I spent all day putting these guys in A Situation, so have a morsel
(from its first cold blossom)
You should carry a shorter blade, Di Feisheng told him once. They were sharing lodgings, early in the search. Someone comes for you in a cramped room like this, you won't have space to use a jian properly.
That doesn't sound like an honourable tactic, Lao Di, Fang Duobing said, partly teasing. What happened to fighting fairly?
Not everyone is a worthy opponent. Di Feisheng downed his wine and rose, the way he would simply end a conversation the moment his point was made.
In the morning, he was gone. On top of his own bag, Fang Duobing found a pair of daggers, their blades shaped like an elongated leaf. They were well balanced for throwing, too, plain but expertly crafted. Over the months, he grew used to their weight, tucked in his clothes, close to his body.
When packing for this journey, Fang Duobing did hesitate over the blades. What would Di Feisheng think of him using his gift, even after their acrimonious parting?
He sheathed one dagger at his belt, the other in his boot, and went.
The trees rustle in a gust of wind, and their shadows sway across the grass. Under them, someone is sitting on their haunches in front of the graves.
In front of Li Lianhua's grave.
Fang Duobing pulls short, a challenge on his lips. The graves lie below the mists shielding the mountain, but no one would come here on accident.
Before he can speak, Di Feisheng stands, turning in the same motion.
Fang Duobing stares. Are you real? It almost slips from him. It wouldn't feel impossible that the play of light and shadow were fooling his eye, conjuring a phantom from his buried thoughts.
If we ever meet again, have your sword at the ready. That was the last thing Di Feisheng said to him, sparking with fury.
His face is gaunt and still. His eyes cinch with what, on anyone else, Fang Duobing would call uncertainty.
I'm doing a bunch of rewriting of my difanghua fic (which I'll hopefully start posting at the end of July, just in time for the 3 year anniversary of the airing of the first episode of MLC), so I figured now would be a good time to post an excerpt!
Have some pre-difang vibes, with a very out of it and in pain DFS and an unfortunately horny FDB.
***
"A-Fei?" Duobing called a few minutes later. "May I come in?"
Di Feisheng swallowed back a curse and made one more attempt to get his almost completely numb fingers to grab onto the hairpin of his xiao guan. Finally, finally, they closed around the decorative dragon head with enough grip that he'd be able to pull it free. "Yes," he managed, wincing at how strained his voice sounded.
He let go of Xiangyi's hand just long enough to stabilize the xiao guan and pulled on the hairpin. It came out, and his hair tumbled free. The instant relief of not having that extra weight and pressure on his screaming acupoint and skull, of not having to ask for help getting it off, or to not have to force himself not to flinch away or choke someone in response to encroaching hands, made him have to close his eyes to breathe through their traitorous attempts to burn.
"Um," Duobing said, his voice too high and choked.
Di Feisheng's eyes flew open, and he blinked repeatedly to force them to focus and show only one Duobing instead of two, standing just inside the privacy blinds. "What?" he asked, once the world stopped warping.
"N-nothing," Duobing said, a little too quickly. "Glad to see you're getting ready for bed. Shall I take that hairpin before you take someone's eye out with it?"
Di Feisheng glanced down at the hairpin in his hands, which was nowhere near anyone's eyes, then shrugged. The brat probably thought teasing would take the sting out of being helped. "Alright," he said, then frowned, remembering what had happened with the misplaced incense. Better to reassemble it if he wished to see both parts again. Carefully, forcing his hands to obey him once more, Di Feisheng lined up the hairpin and slid it into the xiao guan, unable to stop the faint, relieved smirk tugging at his lips. Finally, something he'd defeated. "Here," he said, holding them out by the dragon's head on the hairpin to avoid changing his grip and dropping them, just barely keeping his arm from shaking from exertion.
It took far too long to notice that Duobing hadn't made a move to take them. Instead, Duobing was just staring at him, his cheeks slightly pink. "You're doing this deliberately," the brat hissed at last, crossing his arms over his chest and looking almost hurt.
Di Feisheng glared, the effort involved in keeping his arm steady making his head throb too angrily to puzzle out what was offending the brat now. "Doing what? Handing it to you? Don't offer if you don't want to help," he snapped, unable to keep the frustrated growl from his voice.
The brat's hurt look vanished, replaced by too many different emotions for Di Feisheng to track while his head felt like it was being impaled, before landing on one that looked vaguely sheepish. "No, I just meant"—Duobing gave the too-bright smile that meant he was about to lie his ass off, badly—"I thought you were holding the xiao guan by the hairpin like that to irritate me! The craftsmanship is unequaled. It deserves better than to just be dangled about! Here," he said, holding out a hand for it, "I'll take them, alright?"
Di Feisheng raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. The truth didn't matter. At least Duobing had figured out on his own this time that he hadn't been deliberately insulted. Might as well pretend he believed his ridiculous explanation. "It's sturdy," he said, putting it in Duobing's waiting hands. "It can handle it. I wouldn't wear it otherwise."
Duobing looked down at the xiao guan in his hands with a faint, almost sad smile. "Something can be sturdy and still deserve care, a-Fei," he said, his voice oddly soft and weirdly gentle. "They're not mutually exclusive." Then he looked up at Di Feisheng, brows raised, an expectant, hopeful look in his eyes.
What the fuck was the brat on about now? Was he really going to lecture him on proper care of accessories?
Oh. No, Duobing meant . . . that he, Di Feisheng, was . . .
Di Feisheng scoffed (or tried to; the sound was too soft, and almost fond, even to his own ears) and looked away, his gaze falling on the wrist guards he'd stacked to his right.
Well, he thought, forcing his hands to pick them up and to keep the parcel tucked between them hidden from view, this was a good a time as any.
I totally think that if mlc had been from fdb's pov it would have read like a ya novel with a female protagonist. Running away from home to escape a marriage! Getting constantly ditched by your mentor/love interest/sugar daddy! Reluctantly growing close with the villain/your other love interest (who isn't as bad as he seems)! Discovering your mentor/love interest/sugar daddy is not who he said he is and that he actually was in/is in a situationship with the villian/your other love interest with loads of sexual tension! Dramatic reveal of evil scheming father! Character growth galore but still being a petty prissy little princess!
Cursed MLC thought that I need to inflict on the world: aspec Di Feisheng experiencing the urge to kiss someone for the first time at age 30 and then suffering, in rapid succession, the indignities of: a. wanting to kiss Fang Duobing, b. Fang Duobing being his first kiss, and c. Fang Duobing promptly critiquing his kissing skills and giving him pointers in his usual condescending fashion.
ok, you know what, fuck it, fic recs post. historically i try not to rec works in progress or things i haven't commented on and i'm throwing that fully out the window for this because honestly, fucking whatever.
if you're on this list and i haven't been fully unhinged at you in the comments, please know that it's because (1) i'm the worst and (2) i'm trying desperately to calibrate so i hit 'enthusiastic' and not 'kind of frightening, actually'. i swear that i have written at least several sentences of a comment for every fic on this list, it's just that i'm genuinely impossibly slow, sometimes. it's me, not you.
my previous rec post is here, in case you missed that. as a bonus, special for this rec list and as a concession to the horrors, i am attempting to guess how much any given fic will fuck up the average person. obviously this is a ymmv kind of situation, but i'm trying, at least?
everything else under a cut because i am longwinded.
and found by @dangerouscommiesubversive, explicit, every possible combination of di feisheng/fang duobing/li lianhua | li xiangyi; bless, but i am not typing all that out. starting off with a wip where i haven't left a comment in like four fuckin' chapters, breaking those rules real good. this fic is a fucking ride. i will admit that i wasn't entirely convinced by the premise when i saw the blurb, but i am nothing if not willing to admit when i was wrong, and i was—once again—totally wrong. this is the fic where i was like 'ok but…is anyone really, like, desperate for gen z li xiangyi?' and then i read it and i was like 'ohhhhhh fuck yeah, ok, i get it, i was actually fully desperate for gen z li xiangyi.' he is. such a little prick. i love him. there has been something unexpected and delightful in every single chapter of this so far, plus a number of impressively memorable one-liners. this fic is fun and distracting and at least as of chapter seven, i'm gonna say it's not even gonna fuck you up. (please note that this is only through chapter seven!)
and the days are bright red by @junemermaid, explicit, di feisheng/fang duobing/li lianhua. rip to my beloved tumblr mutual @junemermaid, because they're getting called out twice in this list, but: tough. this fic is so delightful. featuring: memories of slut era li lianhua, the mortifying ordeal of being known, an entire box of historically accurate sex toys, fang duobing and di feisheng communicating (sometimes silently) in a way that unsettles li lianhua (back from his months-long sojourn), some very hot sex that is both very much about sex and also about trust and being perceived, casual intimacy, and fledgling tenderness. there are Emotions in this, and they get moderately intense, but it's a very kind and surprisingly gentle feel-good fic.
a drink under a clear window by @momosandlemonsoda, explicit, di feisheng/fang duobing and fang duobing/qiao wanmian. a fic that tackles the dreaded v-shaped polycule and makes it work. it seems like perhaps it shouldn't: fang duobing as the hinge, with di feisheng and qiao wanmian on either side, but actually it works perfectly, and is a lovely little glimpse at who they could become and the relationships they could have. i love the thought of qiao wanmian having come into her own as a leader in her own right, as more than just the representative of the ghost of li xiangyi, and this does a wonderful job of letting her be her own person. also, yes, ok, passing fang duobing back and forth like a party favour. this is a post-canon fic in which li lianhua is dead, but the fic itself a straightforward delight that is not at all fucky uppy.
the floating clouds, no resting place, again by @junemermaid (not sorry), technically gen and no ship, but functionally pre-di feisheng/fang duobing/li lianhua. the hair-washing fic. ohhhhhh. i started jotting notes for this post the day that i finished this fic, and i really thought that they were in any way comprehensive, but instead, what i typed and left as a note to myself was this:
and honestly. you're right, hypothetical reader, that doesn't totally make sense, but i stand by it regardless, because i apparently had that thought in [checks date i last saved the file] fucking august, and i'm still nodding along with myself. that is that this is like. this fic is very beautiful and will make you ache and will leave you slightly better at the end of it than you were at the beginning. it may also make you cry; this seems to me a fair enough trade.
the floating lotus by @anndramarama, not rated, di feisheng/li xiangyi. pre-canon stuff doesn't always work super well for me, but i really enjoyed this one, featuring di feisheng and li xiangyi when they're both so young and arrogant and full of themselves—and stupid and naïve and young and almost hopeful in a way that they're often not, in fic, for all that they were barely but children at the point of the donghai fight. they just seem…vulnerable, i guess, in this, in a way that i find touching. seasonal bonus: a ghost story, of a sort. given that this is set pre-canon, i think it's hard to come in any softer than bittersweet, which this very much is.
from here one's hand could pluck the stars by @howlingmoonrise, explicit, di feisheng/fang duobing. sex pollen fic! also featuring, a little surprisingly, given the premise, incredibly explicit and enthusiastic consent. look, this does what it says on the tin. di feisheng gets sex pollened. fang duobing is left to stay with him. the obvious ensues. unfortunately, it is also devastatingly charming? fang duobing is earnest and sweet; di feisheng is suffering beautifully terribly and trying so hard not to impose on fang duobing. they're both trying so hard to be respectful of what the other person needs, but they're also still bratty and argumentative and exasperated/exasperating, and it's very entertaining. this will fuck you up none percent, and may even make you laugh.
my war is done by @orchisailsa, explicit, di feisheng/fang duobing/li lianhua. another wip, with the first of three chapters posted, but please understand that this chapter is nearly 15k and so fucking good and compelling. li lianhua lives! and returns to find that things have changed in his absence, and perhaps that he has also changed in his absence, and now wants things that he had told himself he didn't mind not even having to lose. bonus: road trip and—delight!—only one room at the inn. also some other stuff that i'm not spoiling, but that made me absolutely gleeful. this is definitely a work in progress, and while i don't think there's anything particularly upsetting in the chapter, it does end on something of a cliffhanger. i personally do not feel that this is an upsetting cliffhanger, given the information about the fic that's presented in the tags, but it is technically a cliffhanger.
awkward paragraph break, but it's also important, i think, to mention the absolutely stunning (and not at all safe for work) companion piece to my war is done, you'd be there calling my name, by saki the cup bearer, who i don't think is on tumblr. it's fucking incredible; i am very decidedly not an artist but i cannot begin to imagine how much effort went into this. just. holy shit.
not unlike him in shape and form by @philologicalbat, explicit, fang duobing/li lianhua. ok look. i fucking love when things are deeply emotionally messy, and this is so emotionally messy. li lianhua who's been attracted to fang duobing and not doing anything about it, then discovering that fang duobing is shan gudao's son and is very much going to do something about it. he wants in this, and he's cunty and manipulative and mean about it, and sometimes also almost sweet, almost tender, and i love that, because i feel like li lianhua is very often an object of desire and very rarely gets to desire. i love how human he gets to be in this fic. this is not a sweet or gentle fic, but it does end in a moderately tender place that is tentatively hopeful, i think.
unbecoming heir by @bettercostume, explicit, di feisheng/princess zhaoling. i am taking your hand in mine and begging you to trust me. i know what this fic looks like. it's noncon and a weird pairing and you might look at it and expect it to go in the obvious direction and: it does not. this fic is so good that it makes me angry. it makes me miserable and everyone in this fic is trying so miserably, miserably hard, and it's fucking devastating. i spent literally thirty minutes earlier today yelling at my wife about it. i cannot rec this fic strongly enough. this is not a happy fic, but it is a good fic. it will absolutely fuck you up. this is very complimentary but also you will be fucked up.
until you are its primary evidence by @ilgaksu, mature, di feisheng/fang duobing/li lianhua. the single most effective use of what is effectively a prologue that i've ever seen in fic, are you kidding me. this fic is nothing at all like what i expected it to be, and is something far better than what i could have imagined. it's fang duobing's point of view, which is a rarity already, and it's so well done, and it allows him so much humanity and so much anger and grace alike. there are so many tricky things about this fic—the prologue, the fact that it's set in the amnesia arc, fang duobing's pov, the fact that it actually addresses canonical disabilities and illnesses without being fucking weird about it, the tension between the three of them—and it's all balanced so well. this has some emotionally heavier moments but ends tentatively happily; tentative only because it's set during the amnesia arc, and, well. we know what comes next.
as a final note: if you wrote one of these fics and feel that i've wildly misinterpreted the emotional tenor of the ending, please message me in whatever way you prefer and i will correct it. i would not normally presume to guess how things are likely hit people, as i am in many ways not anyone's ideal reader, but today it seemed like it was kinder to at least try.
This is how I imagine Fang Xiaobao a few years after canon.
Pictures are of Zhi Liuhui from Legend of Rosy Clouds* but this is my visual for an older Fang Duobing, who wears his hair the way Li Lianhua does (did).
*who is bisexual in the Japanese canon, which I know will be censored in the cdrama, but I have faith in ZSX that he will be able to make him very bi regardless.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Fang Duobing didn't let himself think too hard as he turned to face Di Feisheng better. He let himself look at the bare, scar-littered skin, at the metal hooked into each nipple. The very thought of it made Fang Duobing’s own chest ache with both pain and pleasure.
“How does it feel?” he wondered out loud.
“Do you want to see?”
Feeling a little like he was jumping off a cliff, Fang Duobing reached for the piercings in answer.
OR: Turns out Di Feisheng has nipple piercings, and Fang Duobing is being extremely normal about them, nothing to see here!
(They fuck about it)
