#dnfi.

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talking about osdd stuff in a very bitter manner sorry in advance

i hate that because i'm in one age-verification-required subreddit for people over 30 with any kind of dissociative disorder reddit thinks i want to see all of the others. at any given time half of my feed is people posting "do you think i have this disorder? i lose time constantly and my friends say i often speak to them in a funny voice and outfit and claim to be the hamburglar but i don't remember and i hear his voice in my head like he talks to me and this morning i woke up and someone had written in my diary I AM THE HAM BURG LAR" and all of the comments are other idiots like omg maybe!!! and i know social media rewards the loudest idiot every day but the degree to which people will be set up by the equivalent of this emoji 🪤 and then somehow emerge from beneath the box hog-tied is exhausting. i opened this app to reply to someone's thread about being worried that grounding on the legal and verifiable facts about their life and body will cause them to somehow split a part who identifies with all of them and cuts everyone else off from being able to even recognize that they're brunette in real life, not watch 26 year olds do this 13 year old unsubtle fishing shit ahsjfshsjf

actually this should go in my dnfi tag because its probably also something a potential follower would want to block me over. eughtjghg. to be clear i hate the clear baiting people do in any kind of mh/disability community but i think its especially bad to open reddit search for r/DIDdissociativesystemdisorderOSDD join it meet karma limit by replying there make a post and then in the post be like "whats wrong with me?". girl you are asking the guess the source channel in the system discord where your hamburgling bag is. i think you know what is happening and what response you want!! playing stupid just so the first person to actually say it isnt you..... dont piss me off

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 —  made by the effervescent @gridman.

 

[discvorld]

i'm saying this as an englishwoman but the amount of (white) europeans who get on this site and re-assemble their shrine to america is insane. yankee this yankee that like i hate the cunts too but you're worshipping the flag daily because it lets your scapegoat all of your countrys deep and evil racism issues onto someone louder and stupider. you're the other side of the coin of the democrat population complaining that under a blue president they never had to see warcrimes - you love trump, you love bush, you love when the big stupid american yodels his big stupid cowboy opinions and you can shake your head and go tch. see in england we don't have racism any more, none of us would ever be so loud and tacky with our bigotry. you need america to take up so much cultural space so nobody asks you about haiti or the congo or kenya or namibia or sudan or pakistan or libya or afghanistan or how your country treats rromani travellers or your blackface traditions or burqa bans or !!!!!!

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listen i'm just going to say as far as the average blue fujo here is concerned i do think the biphobia against mlem specifically is insane. like your uke gets a canon gf and you have a screaming meltdown at the idea that a man could choose to have women in his life even tho he could also choose to go live on badly written anal island? you don't think that it #means #something that instead of going Oh Cool He Can Be Bisexual you hit the brakes with the same ferocity that you insist you WOULD like female characters if they were INTERESTING while posting kylhux or whatever. at least when lesbian affectionados do it abt a woman getting a bf i know its coming less from abject hatred of bi women and more pre-emptive (and frequently justified) fear that a character who was allowed to exist outside of the orbit of some fucking guy is about to get a lobotomy. i think the list of man hating female characters who got a boyfriend and were allowed to keep their personality is like. poison ivy. and she had to kill the guy. like that's based in a real fear of misogyny reducing a character who almost had agency down to a fuckdoll and it's not weird about bisexuals because that's a fear we have too in those cases. but a man who was just standing there in canon is not actually the ground zero victim of being assigned a bangmaid whose name the author barely bothers to give her & your fanart of him fucking mccree was already just tumblr's jakeycest of the month so all you lose at that point is the ability to go HE'S GAY, NOT BISEXUAL EW EW EW at other bitches in your fandom and i dont actually have sympathy for bitches on year ten of fandom hopping from the komaedaslop swamp

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okay here's my single one on this so i stop dwelling: online-only communities for bi and lesbian women* are hellscapes beyond measure bc each side is violently bigoted against the other. but

i think its insane that after years of me pointing out that the twitter masterdoc is biphobic *and* transphobic *and* lesbphobic the creator comes out as bi and the literal hundreds of bitches who decided they were lesbians based on what she wrote about how her experience of attraction to men didn't go back and self examine to check that they too were not biphobic bisexuals. i think once you can identify a very specific subset of masterdoc-ers who meet that criteria you can instantly also id how often theyre the loudest stupidest voice in any discussions about lbt womanhood. they love the d slur and they hate history and they hate irl spaces and they hate gender expression that isnt the most "why are you, a butch, having a bubble bath" dogshit hetlarp and they're almost always in overlap with the bioessentialist trans men who also deify a made up version of lesbianism that seems to earnestly hate women on every level beyond miffyxsnoopy icons and goth gf jokes

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standard biphobia rant you know the drill

i do hate the like "stop saying wlw / sapphic / gl / yuri & grow up and say lesbian" thing bc like yes i do think bitches NEED to get less lesbophobic yes i DO think the choice of yuri is a little weeb-y (me needing to get over it and admit that i'm a longtime weeaboo is why i use it instead of sapphic lmfao) but also..... im a bisexual woman and frequently im talking about bisexual women. i dont need to "grow up" from talking about bisexual women and i'm also not going to talk about an equal ratio of m/f because you don't think a bisexual woman can focus on women without it being a tell that she's a closeted lesbian. there aren't other words i can use because i'm not a lesbian and i am frequently not discussing lesbianism. i'm discussing women fucking women and while i personally am comfortable with the original use of lesbian to describe a relationship between two women you're fucking insane if you think i'm willing to use it in a way that legitimizes lesbophobic rhetoric which it inevitably will do because i will still be talking about those characters bisexuality. like its not my fucking fault that the online sphere uses sapphic to avoid saying lesbian any more than its [your: ie the people pushing against wlw as a term] fault that people will call ships with canon confirmed bisexuals in it a lesbian ship bc thats less gross™ to them. aaaaaaaaa

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the thing about transmisandry™ is that no man espousing it has yet to manage a checklist of things they face specific to their made up oppression that doesn't require you to ignore significant overlap with trans women, butch women, or cis women who experience some degree of degendering based on another axis of marginalization (ie race or disability) and this is fundamentally because no trans man who was not *already* a feminist based on MORAL principles bothers to develop them after coming out. instead its the contingent of pre-misogynistic closeted/unrealized trans men who saw feminism as just because they were the ones being harmed who believe wholeheartedly that a) its wrong for them to have faced misogyny (or still face misogynistic misgendering as an extension of transphobia) because They Dont Deserve It and for no other reason and b) the reason they face it has nothing to do with their classification within a misogynistic system but everything to do with they themselves as an individual possessing some kind of astral genome that designates them to this rung on the hierarchy forever more unchanging under the father the son and the holy spirit forever amen. and such. and that's why the men i know don't fall for this shit, because their understanding of feminist and intersectional principles had already extended to incorporate ways that they (white/ablebodied/literate/etc) were posited to have institutional power over others, so adding the axis of misogyny to that metric didn't cause them to undergo victim complex ego death or lash out in self-defensive violence.

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the current discourse round is so fucking triggering, side complaint. "some women are pedophiles and can't exempt themselves from the accusation" is an insane sentence to drop as a like, winning move (presumably). i can have 0 tolerance understanding and empathy for women who are attracted to children and not working on remedying or fixing that¹ and still campaign for their human rights. i literally already have that feminist framework for cisfem pedophiles and misogynistic violence, obviously i can extend it to transfem and transmisogynistic incidence........

¹ as with women who need to leave abusive rls but have kids, i'm well aware that i personally will never be a safe landing pad for women who have an attraction to children for whatever reason² and need patient understanding longterm support to untangle the why and how. the women who can do that work i have a lot of respect for bc i know its not easy (by virtue of how hard it is for me if nothing else #myempathylack) but ohhh my god the current push for like. the idea that it says nothing about your values or safety if your desired handling of this is to be upfront about it without anyone being able to decide to end contact with you for their own sake + clearly seeking no solution or management strategies + existing peacefully in spaces that aren't adult-only without oversight or criticism? mm. no.

² i'm sorry i just disbelieve that anyone who isn't a pedophile for power and abuse purposes is *actually* atttracted to children. either you're attracted to the physical features (which idc about bc many adults can have them), or you're incapable of being attracted to adults (frequently for abuse victim reasons, i know ppl on my old person DID circuits who struggle with either a) seeing physical bodies that match the one that abused them or b) seeing their own body as adult now & working on accepting that they're no longer feeling same-age-appropriate attraction bc theyve grown older) or you're attracted to mental features (in which case you need to sort out why and then hold yourself to the same standards as any excessive sadist and remove the capacity for temptation from your life) and all of these things are fair reasons for people to not be comfortable around you and to end your contact if you tell them.

honestly i lost track of what i was saying here #myblog #mystreamofconciousness but i do think what it boils down to is that i personally think its irresponsible and stupid to not keep adult-only stuff in adult-only communities and that while kids can and do lie (and im not advocating for passport submissions or witch hunts), way more people need to get it together and embrace locked accounts and private forums. "oh how will people know we exist" well right now half of the site knows ageplay exists because kink blogs keep appearing in their notes explicitly against their dni so the current method is already not fucking working