seen from Germany
seen from Japan
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from Belgium
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Canada
seen from Australia
seen from Germany
seen from Mexico
seen from Netherlands
seen from Malaysia
seen from Singapore
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from Maldives
seen from Poland
seen from Japan
seen from Thailand
Red Robin, watching Dan drag the dead body of Ra’s Al Ghul across the road: what the fuck
Dan, talking to himself: this’ll teach that immortal loser what happens when you try to recruit me for his creepy assassin gang
Red Robin, activating comms: O? Ima need you to direct be to the nearest jeweler, I’m getting married
Oracle: I don’t get paid enough for this shit
Red Robin: you don’t get paid at all
Oracle: exactly
@lisartino found your meme!
Link to Base:
💬 0 🔁 58 ❤️ 139 · You, too, can now give the Observants their daily dose of heart attacks! · With this DP version of the Panik-Kalm meme,
Pass the Salt, Please;
DPxDC Dead Justice Prompt
Tim made a mistake. A very bad mistake.
Listen, he loved Dan. Loved him with his whole heart; which is why he tried to avoid the idea of his boyfriend meeting his family.
For a lot of reasons, too. Not just because his adopted father was a paranoid bat vigilante who wasn’t too fond of people with powers and that the rest of his family were vigilantes and were def going to embarrass him.
Though he had to say he mostly hid his boyfriend from them bcs he doubted they’d react too well when they found out about Dan’s…past adventures.
The point was that because Tim loved Dan he was trying to hide him from them. But it didn’t work, because why would it?
Hence the family dinner his boyfriend and him were currently at.
“So,” Dick grinned, his voice too cheerful, “how did you and Tim meet?”
Followed me home from patrol and broke into my apartment to give me flowers, a bejeweled dagger, the severed hand of Ra’s Al Ghul, and a poster board saying “please love me” Tim mentally snorted, “it was a chance meeting, I guess,”
“Like fate,” Dan grinned, his fangs gleaming and Tim could see Bruce take note of it in real time
Damian turned to face Dan, “What makes you think you are worthy to be connected to the Wayne name?”
Bruce sighed, “Damian,”
“It’s an honest question, Father,”
“Well,” Dan started, “To be honest, I suppose the fact that I am—“
A swirling portal of green ripped through the dining room, the Waynes leaping into action minus Tim (and Dan, of course).
Three Observants stepped through.
“Dark Phantom,” Observant 1 said, “You have been neglecting your duties to—“
Dan snarled as his eyes glowed red, a powerful ectoblast slamming into the two Observants next to the one that had spoken and a blast powered up for the last one.
“I,” Dan’s voice was Eldritch and horrific, “Am meeting my cursed treasure’s family. Disperse before I rip out your souls from your bodies and devour them!”
The Observants quickly vanished and the portal disappeared; Dan sitting down in his seat calmly as the rest of the Waynes stared in horror (minus Tim, who had his head in his hands and muttering about never living this down).
Dan made eye contact with Bruce and grinned, his teeth sharp and needle-like in his too-wide grin, “Pass the salt, please,”
Dead Justice Drabble #2
Bruce had been firmly against summoning the Dark Phantom from the very beginning, but with the threat of an alien race too strong for the Justice League approaching Earth rapidly with intentions of takeover, he was outvoted.
The hope was that Constantine and Zatanna could convince the Dark Phantom to help fight off the aliens...and hopefully not to destroy them earlier.
So Batman had to bite his tongue when the ritual drawn on the Watchtower floor began to glow toxic green, the Justice League members all tensing.
After a moment or two of ominous glowing a creature finally emerged. It was made of the darkest shadows, limbs too long with a mouth full of fangs and hair made of white flames. The creature stood over ten feet tall, crouching over to not it's head on the ceiling.
"Who dares summon the Dark Phantom?" It rasps out.
Red Robin tilted his head to the side as Wonder Woman stepped forward, "We are the Justice League, we ask for you assistance in-"
"Dan?" Tim suddenly asked, "Is that you?"
The Dark Phantom froze before the shadows began to dissipate and the creature shrunk until a young man stood with glowing red eyes and black hair with white dyed underneath it.
"Tim? Babe?" The Dark Phantom, or Dan, blinked. "What are you doing here?"
"What are you doing here?!" Tim shot back, "Since when you were an eldritch being?!"
"Since when were you a vigilante?!"
The two were at a standstill before Dan grinned evilly, "You look sexy,"
Batman Mode was replaced with Dad Mode, "No! No, no, not happening!"
Bruce wrapped Tim in his cape to block him from Dan's view, "Not a chance in hell!"
Tim groaned, face flushing red beneath the Batman cape as Dan whistled innocently.
------------
Me: *throwing Dead Justice content into the void aka Tumblr* I must feed my children!
Dead Justice (?)
Lemme explain, picture this, Dark Dan is redeemed and reverted to about sixteen or seventeen years of age due to some timey wimey stuff courtesy of Clockwork.
Dan’s got blood red eyes, black hair with white underneath it, killer fangs, and pale skin, other than that, completely normal human looking appearance.
He stays in Gotham to (half) live his life when he sees Tim Drake for the first time.
Tim who looks like a sick Victorian child, who is smarter than anyone he’d ever met before, who is sharp and precise and could cut down kings with just words.
Dan’s in love—except Ghost Love is different, and even then Dan’s pretty unique in that sense. He’s obsessive with his love, fixating on it.
He stalks Tim, learns everything about him (Red Robin included), learns his friends and enemies and all in all his going full Gomez Addams to Morticia Addams on Tim’s ass
And Tim? Touch starved neglected as a child Tim? He’s just as nearly obsessive, he knows Dan’s past and to have a lover who is strong enough that Tim’s paranoia can slightly ease itself away is perfect.
Dan adores Tim, practically worships him. Would bring him the head of Ra’s on a golden platter (he loves Tim too much to settle for silver) if he so wished.
From a distance, they’re obsessive and lovesick and probably problematic at best
But to them (plus ghost standards)? By the ancients are they in love.
BONUS !!!
Bruce: Tim…I think we may have to have a little chat about Dan.
Tim: what about him?
Bruce: he seems rather…possessive.
Dick: Oh for crying out loud! Tim, he’s obsessed with you, it’s not healthy!
Tim: he just likes to be with me
Dick: Timmy…he nearly ripped the head off of the barista who flirted with you
Tim: she touched my hand without permission, he was defending my honor
Bruce: he’s been arrested three times for assault against people you’ve interacted with
Tim: all deserved, By the way
Dan, walking into Wayne Manor with Ra’s unconscious body being dragged behind him: Tim, my beloved cursed treasure, I have a gift for you!
Bruce:
Dick:
Tim: Aw, he’s so romantic!
Just for the record, Dan and Tim’s relationship is NOT this;
Dan: I’ve never done anything wrong in my entire (half)life
Tim: I know this and I love you
It’s this:
Dan: I’ve done so many things wrong in my (half)life
Tim: I know this and I find it hot
Dead Justice Drabble #1
Dan doesn’t handle Tim leaving well. He’s like a feral cat in a way; whenever Tim leaves to go to WE, Dan’s doing everything he can to get his bf to stay.
Dan *rushing in with stab wound*: Tim! I’ve been stabbed! I’m bleeding! You need to take me to the hospital and/or dress as a sexy nurse to take care me!
Tim: Babe, you’re already half dead; you can’t die. And you’re not even bleeding anymore, quit doing this when I have meetings
Dan, *hiding Tim’s car keys inside his chest cavity*: good luck getting them now!
Tim, *whose def prepared for this*: *pulls out second pair of keys*
Dan: I’m pregnant!
Tim: *kisses his cheek* We’ll talk baby names when I get home, then,
Dan: *ferally latching onto Tim’s leg as he tried to leave out the door*: why are you leaving me?!?
Tim: it’s for two hours! That’s it!
Dan: you hate me, don’t you?!?!?
DP x DC: Dan x Jason
Jason: I’m the Red Hood! I’m a killer! A murderer! How could you even stand to look at me?!
Dan, who murdered the entirety of Earth’s population and had his humanity physically ripped out of him and merging with Plasmius’ ghost half via core consumption that could technically be considered semi-cannibalism:
Dan:
Dan: So basically when I was fourteen—
