“hey bro do you think you can get ice cream?” you asked, childe spinning his head around from the couch, looking at you like “what?”. he dropped his phone onto his lap, still sitting in the couch as he just cocked a brow up.
“did you just call me ‘bro’?” he asked, slightly confused. “I mean, okay dude, i guess I can.”
“ajax, it was just a prank, love,” you explain, him just still confused. he knew it was a prank, but he was wondering why you even did that. like, what was it worth? I mean, come on, if it was a prank you should have replaced his toothpaste with mayonnaise or something. overall, he just thought it was a little odd- and just for that, he refused to buy ice cream.
“you suck ass.”
“fuck you.”
—
Kaeya - ♐︎
“bro, are you serious right now? did you really leave the toilet seat up?” you asked, disgusted by his behavior. however, he was more disgusted with your usage of the word “bro”. he hated that, he wasn’t your “bro”, he was your boyfriend.
in retaliation, he just rolled his eyes and said “call me bro again, and I’m going to always leave the toilet seat up.” what an empty threat, he never stayed true to his threats. you scoffed and just rolled your eyes back.
“whatever, bae. i was just kidding, y’know?” you reassured him, half scoffing and half smirking right then and there. he was still annoyed, he doesn’t take this shit lightly because he’s a sensitive bastard. “god, you’re such a baby.”
“could tell you the same shit when you cry when I fu-”
“kaeya alberich, shut the fuck up before I beat your ass,” you cut him off, holding a wooden spatula in your hand as he lightly laughed.
“whatever bae, I was just kidding, y’know?” he mocked you.
“kill yourself.”
(author’s note: the way I cringed writing this-)
—
Diluc - ♉︎
“hey bro, so I was thinking-”
you were immediately cut off by diluc’s reply. “bro?what am I, your close friend? dear, am I getting friend-zoned mid-relationship?” he speaks up, even though he knows you’re just joking, he thought he’d tease you a little.
“c’mon~ you know it’s a joke,” you whine, rubbing his forearm.
you two were in the middle of eating at a restaurant, diluc’s chopsticks holding the chicken between the two wooden utensils as he looks at you with a laughing and reading expression.
“y/n, you’re so strange sometimes,” he speaks before placing the food in his mouth.
you honestly expected a greater reaction out of your boyfriend, but I suppose he just thinks it’s a “you” thing.
—
Zhongli - ♑︎
“bro, so today I found this really cool kitchen gadget at the super market, can I use it to prepare dinner tonight? it’s an INSTANT PEALER for veggies!” you exclaim, zhongli just listening to you like usual.
“sure, why not? what are we having for dinner?”
did he not catch you? you did say something sort of weird. so, you say it again. “uhhh, we’re having fried zucchini and pasta, bro.”
“sounds lovely, I can’t wait, do you need help in the kitchen tonight?”
maybe he didn’t catch it again; he is kind of an idiot.
“no thanks, bro.”
“you realize I know what you’re doing and I just don’t care, right?” he speaks very nonchalantly and smiles cockily. it irked you, your face twisting into an embarrassed yet defensive expression.
