#drunk master

[sanaez214]

Elden Ring Fan Art. If Alexander squeezes some wine down inside him...DRUNK MASTER Alexander!!

[lewistanmexico]

Zhou Cheng - Iron Fist Marvel- Netflix

[itsgoodtoseemeisntit30]

One Too Many- Dhawan!MasterxFem!Reader

Warnings: Swearing

You woke as a loud crash sounded below you. You raised your head slightly and listened, trying to determine if a call the police was needed or not but as you heard a voice curse as he was walking up the stairs. You knew that northern voice anywhere.

You laid your head back down on your pillow and moaned, you hadn’t had a full night’s sleep for at least a week, the last thing you really wanted was the Master coming to disturb you again.  

The door creaked open; he had put the landing light on so light flooded your room making sure you were fully awake.  

“Heyyy Y/N wakey-wakey. It’s adventure time” said the Master in a fake whisper.  

“Go away Master, I just want to sleep” you groaned.  

“Boo, you’re so boring Y/N” whined the Master. His voice wasn’t normally this whiney and you weren’t sure if it was your tired brain or if he was actually slurring his words.  

You turned over to face him, squinting as the light hit you, the Master was standing over you, unable to keep still, swaying all over your room. “Are you drunk?” You asked, propping your head up on your hand.  

“Nope” denied the Master but as he tried to take a seat on the end of your bed, he misjudged it and fell to the floor making you blurt out a load laugh. When you had regained your composure, you looked down at him, he was sitting on his bum looking very confused as to how he got down there.  

“Are you ok?”  

“Yes, I’m fine *hic* love. I think, I think I might just take a little nap right here” He hiccupped taking off his jacket and making a little nest for himself on your floor.  

You sighed and got up out of bed, forgetting that you were actually completely naked and knelt down beside him. “Come on, you’re not sleeping down here, come to bed.” You managed to get him to sit up and it was then he took in your naked form through unfocused eyes. He poked your breasts which make him giggle and you rolled your eyes. You used all your strength to haul him up and push him onto your bed, still fully clothed.  

Noticing this, you began work on removing his waistcoat and shirt, cursing how many buttons he had on his garments. It was when you began on his trousers did, he drunkenly mumble “oooh, you’ll have to buy me dinner first.”  

By the time his clothes were off and he was just in his underwear, the Master had passed out, his head turned towards your side of the bed. You sighed and pulled the bedcovers up around yourself and him and settled down next to him. You pushed a stray piece of his black hair back from his face and kissed his forehead. He was damn cute when he was asleep but you already knew that a hungover Master was going to be a nightmare in the morning.  

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You woke up again around 8am and at first you were a little confused as to why the Master was sprawled out in your bed and then the events of the previous night came back to you. You crept out of bed, put your dressing gown on and crept out of your room.  

You made your way downstairs, making note of the destruction the Master had left in his drunken wake. A plant pot had been tipped over so there was soil on the floor, your shoes that had previously been lined up neatly in a row had been kicked around so they were all over the place. You shook your head and picked your way into the kitchen. You grabbed a glass and a mug and boiled the kettle, whilst you were waiting you looked into your medicine cabinet and found some fizzy tablets you always took when you had a hangover. You weren’t sure if they were going to do your sleeping companion upstairs any good but it was worth a try.  

You carried the fizzing glass and your morning coffee back upstairs and got back into bed. The Master stirred next to you and you looked down at him.  

“Good morning Sleeping Beauty” you said in your sweetest voice.  

“How on Earth did I get here?” Grumbled the Master looking around your darkened room.  

“Well you burst in rather drunk last night, uninvited I may add and passed out on my bed” You informed him taking a sip of your hot drink.  

“I feel like shit” he muttered

“Thought so, I’ve made you this” you said, handing him the fizzing glass.  

“What is it?”  

“It’s medicine, it should help with your headache”  

The Master took hold of the glass, sniffed it and then downed the drink in one. 

“That’s disgusting” he grumbled. He handed you the glass back and laid back down.  

“So, what are we up to today then?” You asked brightly.  

The Master looked up at you with a dark expression on his face “you do realise that in addition to the constant drumming I have always had in my head I now have another self-inflicted thumping going on. I am not leaving this bed at all. Today"  

“Want to finish that murder documentary then?”  

“I thought you’d never ask”  

[this-is-a-yaku]

every so often I remember that the conclusion of drunken master ii (1994) was considered to be in such poor taste by their American distributor that they played it without sound lmao

[onironerd]

Me: Man new Hanzo is going to take a while to get used to. I can't shoot the broad side of a barn now.

Me: *gets 3 gold and a card*

Me: Wut

[robottopurinta]

ドランクモンキー 酔拳

[theonetruesliceofpizza-blog]

Looks like I came on at a bad time

[lkarina9]

Treinando com o Jackie.