#dwd crack

[astudyinchocolate]

[artsyaish]

Kike! Watashi no na wa Dad Arondo! 😍 I've had this haunting my head forever (this stormed into my brain after I heard Mage saying "Daddy Arlond" in the English dub version) LOL Daddy!Rem who has at some point unleashed them feels being head over heels in love with zee Baby!Arondo (insert a cute and fitting boy name here, yes it's a baby boy, period), the future Heir to the Devil Realm throne etc etc. I love drawing Rem's almost non-existent eyebrows, they're adorabubble. Also Dad Rem wears a cape, cause why the fuck not, royal outfits don't have to make sense amirite. SOOO... I humbly serve some Daddy Rem blushy feels. Am I kicked out of the fandom yet? 🙃

[dancewithderps]

Going back to my dwd crack folder, I felt the need to repost some mustache edit I did back then. They're still relevant imho.

[astudyinchocolate]

Darkwing defeats the crummy capitalist cronies!

[dancewithderps]

SOMEONE PLZ STAHP US.

@ask-ritsuka-tachibana

[dancewithderps]

Oh, before I forget

Nesta’s sad attempt to use fb for his first time take possesion of the grimoire’s power.

That’s rough buddy.

[dancewithderps]

A DWD crack fanfic. I tried.

"I'm bored. Let's do something."

A book was sitting on a pillow, arms crossed. Beside him, a dog was sleeply browsing a magazine.

"Mh..."

"Im bored Roen, let's do something." Silence was broken again.

"And what would you like to do, master?"

"Dunno. I hoped you could tell me."

"Actually, I was reading this extremely interesting Grimoire issue--"

"Oh c'mon Roen! How can you lay here in this boring silent room? Don't you feel the need to go outside? Fishing maybe?"

"Err..."

"I know you do! That's precisely why we're going fishing right now!" The book stood up, "I don't want to disappoint such a loyal servant after all!"

"...Sssure." Roen compliantly sighed and stretched.

***

I've personally never ever been in Japan, let alone being there on summer. But that day, it was hot and windy, and almost no one in their right mind thought being around the port was a smart idea; no wonder fishing on a summer day in Japan might have been the worst idea ever.

"Doesn't you feel reborn now, loyal servant? Fishing is the best!!"

"I wanna die..."

As no one was around, Maksis was relieved to be able to wear his lovable Sampei's* hat and freely throw the hook. (*if you don't know who Sampei is, I feel old OTL)

Maria had scolded him a lot whenever he wanted to walk or help her with groceries, when they were at the konbini store. "Just, please, try to not draw attention. If there are humans around, act like a proper book."

"Boo, boring" he mumbled. Maksis deeply loved his wife, but acting like a book was hella boring af. It was like pretending Shiitake boy's chessboard would be able to answer "yes" to anyone's asks: unreal to the most.

So he was pretty relaxed he didn't have to worry about getting attention.

"Eh eh eh, today is the day I'm gonna get a huge one!" Once again the hook dived in. "How's going there, Roen?"

A worn-out dog was laying on the pier as a washed up seal. "It couldn't be worse." He sweared under his breath.

"What? I can't hear you, everything's good? Awesome!"

"Kill me, please..."

Suddenly, Maksis's fishing pole moved.

"What the--! It's pulling! Roen, come help me, this is a big one! Hurry up!"

The white book was struggling with the fishing pole and his short arms, trying also to not let the hat fly away. Roen thought it was better to transform back into his human shape.

"I'm here, Master!" He grabbed the pole and started to pull towards himself.

"Yeah, that's right! Go, go Roen! We got it!"

If someone was about to passing by there, they would find a kinda good looking high school boy, with a weird book fetishism, who was putting his life on risk to fishing something that looked like a huge seal. Or at least something as big as that, seen the dark blue stain that was cropping up to the surface.

"It's giving up, it's giving up, Roen! Just a little more!"

"I hope so, master! Otherwise, I'm the one giving up!" Desperately shouting, Roen tried to pull one last time, and the pole finally followed his moves; the hook dragged the maybe-huge-seal as Roen fell down on the pier.

Maksis was enthusiastic, "We got it we got it!" If he'd had eyes, they'd have sparkled.

But he run out of enthusiasm pretty soon.

"Wha--"

"Master, is everything okay?" Roen sat up massaging his head. His master was astonishingly staring at what was now frantically moving on the pier with them. (Again, if Maksis'd had eyes and mouth, ofc)

As soon as it was clear enough to both of them what it actually was, the book screamed.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL DUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE, YOU SCHOOLBAG?!" (I'm gonna censorship all the swearing)

"Uhm..." The huge violet blue thing muttered.

"G-Glax-sama...?" Roen was speechless.

"It's Mikukier!" The thing shouted "When I'm in the human world you have to call me that!"

"Forget your stupid need of alias you and you Rlond family have." Maksis interrupted him. "I’ll ask you again, you--"

But Sunglasses man was as stubborn as the book himself.

"IT'S NOT STUPID" he shouted back, the big white eye now wide open and glaring at his archenemy.

"IT IS"

"IT'S NOT. I can't let people recognise me."

"YOU'RE A DUCKING HUGE EYE. WHO CARES WHAT YOUR TRUE NAME IS, NO ONE IS GONNA ASK THAT, 'CAUSE YOU. ARE. A DAMN. HUGE. EYE."

"I-IT'S STILL IMPORTANT, OKAY? YOU'D NEVER UNDERSTAND ME!"

It loooked like the verbal war wasn't gonna end soon; Roen compliantly sighed and wished he could just go home to read July's Grimoire issue.

"More importantly, Gla- Mikukier-sama," he wisely interrupted the fight "what were you doing down there in the sea?"

"Hell yeah, water guy. Explain that."

The big eye was taken off guard, and while glaring he looked away.

"It's definitely none of your business, I don't have to tell you."

"Aw, come on diver boy, don't be shy now~" Maksis gladly mocked him.

But that wasn't your usual glaX of water; glaring at the book again, the eye used his eyelashes to grab Maksis' hat and took it away.

"WHAT THE--! Give it back!" He tried to reach the lovable treasure, but his arms wouldn't let him do that.

"Don't even try to mock me again, you shortie!"

"Sampei chaaaaan!" Maksis cried, "How can you even do that?" He then pointed archenemy's eyelashes.

"Eh eh" Mikulax smirked (whit what, tho) "this is all mascara's doing!"

"Uuuurgh the power of fashon!"

Roen seriously prayed no one would come around there at the moment.

"Can we at least try to have a traditional conversation?"

The dorks looked at him and felt unbelievably embarrassed.

"You... you're probably right..." MikumikuGlaxglax slacken off the hat's grip and Maksis jumped to take it.

"Hah! Mine again!" He wore his beloved Sampei chan.

"Now back to business," he nodded at Roen "what were you doing here, sunglasses dude? Not only in the human world, morover randomly into the sea, of all things!"

"As I said, I don't have to tell you. I'm here cause I want to, case closed."

"You really are as stubborn as your goat son..."

Glax grunted and looked away once again. Then blinked one or two and then sighed.

"By the way, old manuscript, you have to took this off me."

"Mh?" Maksis raised his head up.

The eye looked at the hook hooked at his eyebrow. "Oooh!" The book exclaimed.

"Yeah, right. I'll do it... ONLY IF YOU TELL ME! HAH!"

"YOU WOULDN'T--"

"I WOULD"

"Oh no, please, not again..." Roen seriously wanted to go home now. Seriously.

Luckly enough, everyone in the Underworld knew where Rem's tsundere-ness came from.

"I WOULD NEVER SAY IT" the big eye squeezedi, letting the hook to come off.

"I HATE YOU, MAKSIS, I'LL KILL YOU ONE DAY!" And screaming like that, he jumped into the sea once again.

Looking at the dark stain fading away, the white book wondered if those he's seen were tears or simple drops.

"Mpf. Oh well, the nuisance is gone." He snorted. "We can finally go back to fishing, loyal servant of mine!"

"Actually..." Roen raised a hand, sadly breaking his master's enthusiasm, "I really need to go home, Maksis-sama. This encounter with Glax-sama tired me a lot, and also Maria-sama is probably back from the trip, by now. Ritsuka is coming too and I promised to help with dinner on the occasion, so..."

"Oh, right! I totally forgot!" Maksis placed his fist on his hand. "My daughter~! We need to surprise them! A trip to the Underworld is always pretty wearing out."

That weekend Ritsuka had to make important decisions about the Underworld’s government. She and Rem were coordinating everything to rule the land as the great King and Queen they had become. This made her parents really proud. But that time in particular, Ritsuka had to take a choice on a very serious and relevant topic, and Maria felt her anxiety over their usual evening call; so she decided to stay by her daughter's side and - when everything was solved - to take her home to enjoy the human world once again. 

"Just a bit, sweetie." She smiled through the reciever, "It surely won't hurt."

Ritsuka was more than happy to hear that, and a simple glance at her husband was enough to know he agreed with her. "Indeed mom, I think that too!"

~

Master and servant took all the fishing utensils and finally got ready to go home. Roen was so happy he could cry.

On the way back home, the white book was whistleling, all excited.

"I'm gonna see my little baby again, my little daughter~ C'mon, Roen!" He turned to his partner. "Hurry up!"

Roen smiled. "I'm coming, master."

That joyful master of him really moved him.

...Even when he forgot he let the dog carry all the utensils they took with them.

But that was how much loyal Roen was to his master.

***

Later on, at the dinner table Glax was casually mentioned. Ritsuka told them he caught Reina and Rion talking about their grandpas and eavesdropped their conversation: Reina was head over heels for Maksis's coolness while driving a chopper - even with the risk of cutting his own cover! - and Rion silently agreed, vehemently nodding. They also added they wished the Glass grandpa too would be this cool, but the truth was they really didn't know; he was always kinda distant to them.

Ritsuka then chuckled, saying she would have never expected to find Glax-sama  in her room, searching through his grandchildren’s stuff. "Me? I'm not doing anything, just thought this was my office. I beg your pardon." he said while jumping out of the room, slightly in a hurry.

"After he left, I noticed Rion and Reina's books were all over the place. The one about pearls was in full sight on the writing desk. What a weird sir" she chuckled once again.

And that was how Maksis knew what the big eye was doing under the sea.

END.

---- I swear I wrote this all in a few hours and I regret nothing. We needed more Glax/MikukierxMaksisxRoen crack. We just needed it.

So here it is. Enjoy! xD @ask-ritsuka-tachibana @my-son-hates-mushrooms @suchanimetrash @xicequeenxx and whoever is on the crack ship lmao!

[dancewithderps]

I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO UPLOAD IT! YASS. Took me a lot of time but now here it is, dwd crack spam part 2!

I thought it was better to publish it all in a whole post, so it was more... functional? Lol yeah, why not.

SO

@ask-ritsuka-tachibana tell me, dear, do you like this spam as well? :3

one more little pill is coming rn btw!