#earthtodee

[mayberedbird]

Good morning fuckers!

I have gotten about 2 hours sleep. Maybe 3 but that would be pushing it. But I’m at my dear friend’s apartment in NYC.

There will be a visit to The Museum of Modern Art to see my favorite painting of all paintings not done by Kris or Lo. Points if you know what painting I’m all excited to see.

There will be seeing a friend I have known since 4th grade.

There will be street meat, bagels, deli…there will be drunken karaoke with my awesome ladies.

There will be cheering on my friend as she runs a half-marathon tomorrow.

I’m home for the weekend! Miss Jay and the kids but I’m still going to be having a great time.

[mayberedbird]

2012- not sorry to see you go

The first part of the year I spent pretty much living (if you can call it living) in one room, my kids stuck in their shared room. I didn't get to be the mother/wife/person I wanted because of my batshit crazy in-laws. Then in July we moved into our own apartment. And while this was a better environment for us and we began to heal our little family, there was a downside. It is more expensive. Our living expenses increased but our income did not. We are treading water. And we now have no extended family relationships. My kids have no grandparents in their lives. It's been a trade off. Jason has had no luck in finding a job. He's been looking for over 6 months. I see him getting more and more frustrated and sad and I can't do anything to help or make him feel better. I went the full year without seeing my Chicago piece of my heart, Ann and that hurts. Along with this there has been some high points. Very high. I spent an awesome 5 days in NYC with Jill in May for her birthday and saw Michele, Jillian, Dee & Dee. Also we saw my friend Eileen and went to MOMA, and ate our way through the city. I had a second trip home to NYC and spent an amazing night with Michele, Paloma, Jillian, Sean, Dee, Giselle and Liz. Street Meat!!!! I read 56 books towards my goal of 65 and I enjoyed them a lot. I did very well in school. And today my friend Eileen got her biopsy results back and no cancer!! On the whole I'm really not sorry to see this year end. I'm going to hold out hope that 2013 is going to be much better. I'm planning on/looking forward to SNARK and seeing my NYC friends in Feb, graduation in May which I hope Jill will be able to attend, hope to see Ann, hope Jason finds a job and that it's one he likes...meeting more of you would be great too. But I'm going to believe it'll be a better year.

[sarkastickunt]

Ahhhhh bullets. I kinda sorta missed you.

It's election day tomorrow. I'm voting for the guy, ya know?...the guy. Nope. Not that one. The other one.

I am cutting a lot of ties with people I thought were real and actual forever friends. I just don't have time in my life for people that only use me when it's convenient.

I hugged people outside of my daughters' school today because sometimes coming close to losing everything you love makes you appreciate those around you.

The house is quiet for the first time in over a week. I likes it a lot.

My down stairs neighbors were in the process of moving before the storm. Before they could get everything out, the waters came and took out the entire first floor of my building..including all of their boxes and belongings packed for the trucks.

My entire neighborhood smells like mold.

I do not likes a lot.

Things are going to be really, really tight financially for a while. We just can't seem to get a break, but when I look out my window and see people walking around lost and confused and hurting...I think we have it pretty good.

I had farina for breakfast. It made me warm in my cold spots.

I hate when people lie to me. Just be honest. Nothing chases me faster and further away then when someone fucking bullshits me.

I miss my girls...like...for real fo' real. I am anxious to have some time with them. They fill me with the happies.

My nose won't stop running but I'm not upset, I'm encouraged that at least one part of me is exercising.

[mayberedbird]

My Fiver

1. I'm going to be drunk in a little over an hour. It's Date Night. So yay!! 2. In 2 weeks in going to be home in NYC for the weekend. I'm bringing my friend Robyn with me. I plan on getting drunk and doing lovely, dirty things to Michele, dirty water dogs, pizza, bagels, and a shake shack burger (and the lovely Dee's if I'm lucky). 3. Sat the 13th. If you're in the NYC area and want to join us it would be awesome. Let me know. Sean and Jason? Shira? I'm sure I'm leaving people out but if you're there I'm talking to you. 4. I am ready for the election to be over. It feels like the campaigning has been going on FOREVER. 5. I'm going to the aquarium on Sunday. PENGUINS!!!