[Ep 201]
Thog: "I don't know how to put this--we're not tourguides! We're not concierges! We're just here to oversee this; we are ADVENTURERS. Listen up. And THIS—" (he motions in front of himself) "—THIS is what we do, for better or for worse." (Looks at Ballast) "it's for worse. We climb into potato sacks and we cry about it sometimes. It's the way life is."
Markus: "That is right! We climb into potato—" (Markus goes the rest of the way into the bag).
(Jay: Markus vanishes, uh, Thog begins to climb into the sack as well. Karen chimes in, still snake adhesived to her fucking face...)
Karen: "You know what, Thog? I'm, I'm glad you seem to have... found a place to fit in. It... this might sound condescending, seeing as how you're currently descending into that man's mystery sack..."
Thog: "Yeah, definitely does!"
Karen: "...but, you seem to have found a place where you're needed, and that's... that's better than, well, what you were doing at our company, so... congratulations, and... g-g-go get 'em, tiger...." (she says, looking at Ballast McGee)
Thog: "Don't... yeah, please don't do that, look. I'm, I'm not a good adventurer. I'm not-- I don't do what they do. Markus has some fuckin, tiefling, demonic backstory, lookit this shit," (Thog motions over to himself and all the demons) "this is everyday for us. I'm, I'm not an adventurer, when it comes down to it. I spent, eh, what was that, a good 12 years of my life learning how to push papers and people around. That's my job. It turns out, that just happens to be exactly what they need, coincidentally. This-- maybe not another adventurer, they don't need another person with a sword and board, they need somebody who's had a day job for once in their goddamned life." (He descends further into the bag) "the type of person who knows that this shit is fucking ridiculous."
Karen: "Well uh, good luck. I hope you slay a dragon, or whatever you adventurers do--"
Thog: "I don't need to fucking slay a dragon, I've dealt with depression my entire life. I'm already badass enough." (He says, vanishing).
(Matt: Oh, he's the hero we deserve...)
