#evolution of self

[gaiasgaurdian]

🌱

I am manifesting growth, blessings, and your dreams to come to fruition! You will get what is meant for you! You will come into more money, peace, and understanding. Your manifestations will be answered!

[g0blin-hunting]

Can we just take a minute 2008 2010 (I think) & 2017

[gaiasgaurdian]

🌙

Are you repeating any toxic patterns? Take some time to figure out if you’re falling into the same things that don’t serve you. It’s time to notice and start making some changes for the better.

[gaiasgaurdian]

♂

As the Moon goes into Aries, remember that these tough times are helping you see what needs to be changed inward. You may have allowed something to continue on for to long, and your body is telling you to stop. Work on being adaptable during this time. You may be uncomfortable, but as you allow self-reflection it’ll better you for the future

[gaiasgaurdian]

🌿

The Universe wants you to know that times will be hard. Things have been or are becoming emotionally difficult or uncomfortable. It is all for the sake of growth and evolution. Be gentle with yourself and practice self care. Journal your progress and see how far you’ve come!

[redrose200]

the fallacy of self

the fallacy of self

Sun Behind Clouds – Burnham Overy Staithe by Stephen Martyn

the sun bears the weight (of a culmination of clouds) trying to break through, trying to hang on to a clear sky that has abandoned any thought of light —

i see the silk-green texture of people through my spring-leaf glasses and everything seems distant in the tunnel vision of my truths,

i wish to see, i wish i would not see at times, when…

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[micheleelys]

TRANSFORMATION

All of Nature cycles each year including the Antarctic and North Poles naturally;Transformation.

For Humans,  we are comprised of two completely different cells that conjoin together, become an embryo, grow within a body, once born our bodies develop naturally.

But something happens in the Transformation, we are taught Fear, Not to…

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[andthatshowtheworldbegan]

Maybe I’m just stoned and my soul sista is asleep...

Who was I before 2015. Like it’s here a part of me of course. But it used to be so tangible. I longed for that peace I felt before the world turned upside down. This all started from fucking Instagram, looking back on my feed. The person before I found out about Jana and months later my own mothers death doesn’t seem as appealing as it used to be. I go through phases of this and I’m sure the weed helps, but where I feel disconnected from my past self. Usually it was because something was too uncomfortable to face. But the person I was before they died was not uncomfortable. That person has peace and clarity. They were satisfied with where we were at. But then it changed. I had to face mourning and grief not just 2x but a third when I had to see my friend go through an even worse experience imagineable. Mourning and grief. In a constant hit after hit during the first 4 months of 2015. Following and along with the mourning and grief was the numbness. I smoked but it didn’t matter i felt little to nothing. It felt wrong to enjoy, to laugh, to fuck. It all felt so fucked up. Nothing felt right. I did what I had to, went to work, paid my bills. But I’d walk through my days on autopilot. Always looking as blank as I felt. I just stared out the window of the car while we drove anywhere. That was the girl I knew after the pain. The pain was intense and I was glad to feel numb. But then something changed. I can’t recall when but for months now I’ve been feeling so deeply and so fully. I want to inspire and be inspired and I feel that’s happening. I no longer feel the longing to be numb or to be the person I was before I felt this pain. I’ll never be the stoned hippie who overcame an abusive father, sexual assault as a kid, and addict parents. She smoked to feel she felt it all. Then I felt true pain loss and grief. I longed for the girl who felt nothing but positivity and love for the world. That didn’t come, and then I felt numb. Nothing to very little. Now I feel it all. So deeply. I want to love and show compassion and empathy for my fellow man. I acknowledge the shit and piss of the world and work on ways to solve the anxiety it gives me in my daily life. I don’t deny my feelings or bury them away they are accessible to me. And I long to feel them. All of those layers are my current self. I’ve existed through so much. And now I get to continue to exist. Enlightened to it all the pain and the beauty. I get to exist in both sides of the spectrum. Embracing whatever life throws at me because I know I can handle it. I can survive being numb and I can thrive in the beauty. The first picture is me Jan 6th, 2015 before I knew what was happening. The second Nov 23rd, 2017 after embracing my pain and living with it and the beauty. Growth. Please keep going.