#ewfeelings

[daelivesforu]

when people try to advise u but then they end up hurting ur feelings because of the way the said it

[barney99]

'if you drop a coke bottle, open it slowly' hell nah if i drop a coke bottle im putting it back on the shelf for someone else to open accidently, and watch their surprise as it explodes in their face

this isnt about a coke bottle btw

[nelehjr]

I think it's time for That Post. I'm not sure how to say all this, but thank you. The past two years have been an absolute crap shoot. This summer really kind of felt like things fell apart for me and now I'm starting to put them back together. I wish I could hug everyone who showed up for me. There were tears over things ranging from Grandpa's death to sleeping on an air mattress! And through it all, more of you than I can count showed up.💘 Some of ya'll, I haven't seen IRL since we graduated high school, others simply live on the internet, a handful of you drove to my old house in the middle of no where to spend some time with me. I am so, so, so, grateful. I've been blessed to have some amazing people in my life.💘 Thank you. Subtle plug: cool art by @myhippythreads #YesThisPostIsAboutYou #IfTheShoeFitsFeelFreeToLaceThatBitchUpAndWearIt #ThankYou #Graditude #EwFeelings #FeelsTrip (at Laramie, Wyoming) https://www.instagram.com/p/CVp599dryLd/?utm_medium=tumblr

[lolitsdeborah]

#1

Pain and People are temporary.

[mysticalpeanutbutter-16]

Hey

So, no one cares, but I'm back.

[jrwideman]

Here's a nice photo cause if you know a sneakerhead you're not getting much but shoe related posts for the next 5-6 days. #ewfeelings Sidenote: She's bomb af. Also the Raps stay getting us free Popeye's. Bless up. (at Toronto, Ontario)

[twentysomethingsadness]

"You did good"

Hey all, So I’m just lonely and feeling the need to get this out. To acknowledge what is and what I know I need to hear. I’m just having to let go and to give myself permission to be enough in my own eyes. Too long I’ve lived my life trying to win the approval of my parents (whom I love, but beyond that the relationship is rough… ). it was never going to come because I could never be straight enough or conservative enough or happy enough or consistent enough… The pain is just so damn deep. I’m at a crossroads though… Maybe even a bit of the way down the new path… I have been building a life for myself a part from my family. I have a live 6 hours away, I have a great roommate, I have by some miracle now have two jobs and I can pay my bills and eat food etc. I have people that love me and want me to succeed! I’m able to be as “out” as I want and I’m not worried about being seen as who I am. I’m still working through various mental health things amidst it all… But I think I’m doing well… I mean I’m depressed and weepy, but I’m functional enough to leave the house and show up for work and force myself to shower and eat. I don’t take any of that for granted. I’m just so torn up inside and I don’t know how to let go of the hurt and how to take back the power of my own identity… How do I empower myself to be enough? How do I give myself permission to just be? To maybe just exist and piss my parents off by being myself and living myself… I have often felt like Robert Sean Leonard’s character in Dead Poet’s Society… As if a beautiful dreamer, trapped in a life I didn’t choose, treading a path I know i may not survive. A martyr to my ideals.

The thing is though, I’m not a confused, homophobic, closeted 14 year old living with homophobic emotionally abusive parents anymore. I’m a fucking adult (I need to tell myself this every damn day) and I get to make my own choices and be whatever I choose. I’m the one who will live most closely with the consequences of my actions. I am credited with my successes and responsible for my failings. I own me. Today I finally came to that conclusion. I can’t believe it’s almost taken 23 years to begin understanding that I belong to myself and that that is enough. I’m almost 4 months sober in AA soon and working another program and feeling sobriety in that. Haha I’m gonna quote fucking Macklemore, “See, you keep the issues but you take away the drugs/And I had to find out who I really was/Who I really wasn’t/ So sick of who I was becoming/ Yeah, tired of running/Time to look at the man in the mirror until I can learn to love him…” That’s the truth of it though. Take away the coping mechanisms and the pain is right there on top… So accessible… So undeniable. Numbing out for so many years had left a deficit of grief that I have yet to grieve… And now I am doing just that. I’m just so broken. Love you all! if you read this whole damned thing, may God bless you for your perseverance!