(PART 1) I think my question got eaten but I've only discovered that I am ace little over 6 months ago and I've been loving the fact that I finally know what my sexuality is. But recently I've been fairly worried about how that will impact my romantic relationships. I love romantic relationships so I don't feel like I fit within the aro spectrums but I definitely know I don't feel sexual attraction. The thing I'm worried about is ...
(PART 2) The thing I’m worried about is how do I tell someone that I may or may not be willing to have sex (I have never done that.) and what if they feel like it’s a must in the relationship when I’m clearly not sure?
If they feel sex is necessary in a relationship, then that relationship is fundamentally incompatible and you should part ways.
There are a couple schools of thought on how to broach the subject with people you date. If you tell them right away, then there aren’t any incorrect expectations made, but the person also doesn’t get to know you very well first. If you tell them after you’ve been dating for a while, the person may have formed expectations, but on the other hand, will know you better and can decide if they like you enough to have a sex-less relationship. Pros and cons.
You don’t even have to tell them you’re asexual if you don’t want to. And you don’t have to tell them you might want sex later—that could lead to the person thinking they might persuade you, and anyone who wants to persuade someone into sex is a turdface. You can just say “I’m not interested in having sex in any relationship.”