My Lawlight headcanon is that-
L fell first:
But Light fell harder:
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Yeah yeah, I'm well aware that the first friend scene was a lie from L's side and a mind game from both sides- BUT look at Light's FACE (and no Light's a good actor but this split second of '...' + transparent eyes is not a performance imho)
He's genuinely stunned (translation: L broke him for a moment there lmao it's like, during that single moment, they're the only ones in the room!) BEFORE he realizes that they are playing a role here in front of the task force. As Ryuga and Light; which is what he tells Ryuk later:
(His eyes are hidden *clenches fists* Light is emotionally affected and does not want anybody to know that L got him. Again.
Except this time, he feels humiliated in a strange sort of way.
Despite everything, including the whole 'enemies till death do we part' thing they have going on? Light enjoyed his time with L (albeit not without the collateral damage of other people dying but I digress). He DID like playing tennis with Ryuga as he tells him. That part's not a lie! L being a good friend is not true though.
L does not want Light as his friend for real. He's bullshitting as always to catch Light off guard. This isn't new. But it. is. Personal (to Light, at least).
Only it shouldn't be! This is all part of their game, isn't it? Then why does Light feel a bit...disappointed due to it not being real? In an alternate universe, would he have liked truly being L's friend?
No! Of course not, that is a ridiculous line of thought! Additionally, just 2 chapters ago, Light was like:
Can you see the lawlight and yagamane parallels here? L intends to catch Kira!Light and poses an execution threat to Light while Misa means to date Light and poses some threats of her own:
Both L and Misa come on too strongly toward Light (one as an enemy and the other as a potential ally). Light merely wants to get rid of them both so as to achieve his keikaku with ease. While dealing with Misa, Light thinks, 'I'll be killing her eventually...I can't develop feelings. That's how most idiots screw up.'
Notice how similar this is when it comes to his dynamic with L as well? He has to kill the latter eventually too and his reaction (to when he's confronted with the fact that Rem *can* kill L at his immediate request before the fiasco of Misa getting arrested happens at least) is this below btw:
The guy is truly shocked at how easy it seems to kill someone as intelligent as L. Light does not smile or seem amused. He takes this (L's future death) very seriously (I think it's the first time he does this since his first two kills). I believe it's partly due to the begrudging respect he has toward the genius detective and partly because of the 'what-if's in his mind.
His eyes, blown wide, are unreadable except for the astonished look they show. It is a rare display of emotion we see from Light (I can't seem to pinpoint just what the emotion is tho) which is quite noteworthy imho.
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...Wow I got carried away.
The point is! Light feels a little humiliated for letting his emotions get the better of him even if it was for just an instant during which he was gobsmacked by L's lie which he wished for it to be true.
Light can rationalize it all he wants but deep down, in his heart, he'd always know that there was a period of time (however small) that he not only fell for L's lie, but also secretly under LAYERS of repression actually just wanted to live in that world- the world where there was neither L nor Kira, just Ryuga and his friend Light.
That's wishful thinking and boy would Light hate this if he acknowledged for even a second that yes, he does want that.)
Again. Light 'Developing Feelings = Idiotic Screw ups' Yagami cannot afford to deceive himself that L, on some level, wants to befriend him as that may as well cost his life if he did. He cannot get distracted as that was most definitely one of L's intentions of calling him his 'first friend'.
He'll dutifully play along as he had anticipated it a while ago:
"I like this, Ryuga. If you want to be friends with me. I'll gladly hang out with you."
Light sure looks thrilled as hell to be role-playing as L's friend lmao- like he loves mind games, he revels in duplicity, he enjoys challenges that L adds to his life so is it any wonder that the combination of all is *chef's kiss* for Light? He is so so EXCITED to be hanging out with L face-to-face + looks forward to stabbing him in the back!!
Gotta love lawlight! </3 <3
