Robin, showing up to a crime scene with Red Robin and Red Hood to find Ladybug force feeding an apprehended Riddler danishes:
Robin: . . .
Robin: Ladybug, you cannot solve every problem with pastries.
Ladybug, shoving a scone into Riddler's already over stuffed mouth: *gives Robin a flat look*
Ladybug: Watch me.
Red Robin: Honestly, I've yet to see it not work for her.
Red Hood: She bribed a whole gang last week with croissants.
Ladybug: It's called diplomacy.
Robin: It's called bribery.
Ladybug, considering Robin: *holds out a macaron*
Robin: *stares at it a moment before taking it*
Robin: ... I won't tell Batman.
Red Robin, munching on a muffin: This is how Gotham falls.
Red Hood, nodding with a cookie: Pastry bribes.
___
I picture Riddler quietly choking in the background as Ladybug smothers him with more and more pastries. She's not bribing so much as threatening death by overconsumption.
Adrien froze as soon as he heard shouting coming from the classroom. He took a deep breath and halted as the voices became clearer.
"God, Marinette, you're such a bitch!"
"You need to stop obsessing over Adrien!"
"He's allowed to date whoever he wants!"
"You need to leave him and Lila alone!"
"You're so fucking pathetic!"
"I can't believe you interrupted their date!"
"Stop stalking him and ruining everything!"
"He's allowed to be happy without you!"
'What?'
Adrien slammed open the door to see everyone glaring at Mari, and her just sitting in her seat. She didn't even seemed fazed by all the yelling that had been happening.
'How often are they yelling at her that she isn't even fazed by it? What happened to all of us being friends?'
"I would like to know how Marinette is stalking me and why no one thought to mention it to me?" Adrien demanded.
Alya turned to Marinette with a smile, like they had won something.
"It's okay." Nino said, putting his hand on his shoulder, "Lila told us everything."
"I can't believe you had to deal with that!" scoffed Alya, "Lila was so uncomfortable that her mom took her to Italy to visit family. She says she'll be back in two weeks."
"I asked about Marinette, not Lila." Adrien stated, confusing everyone.
"She's ruining your dates with Lila, on purpose!" cried out Rose.
"I'm not dating Lila!" the model shouted, "Not even if my father forced me too!"
The class looked at him as if he had just sprouted another head. They looked around at each other, but their focus went back to him.
"What?" he asked.
"But…Lila said-" whispered Mylene, unable to continue her sentence.
The silence of the room was interrupted as Marinette's giggles broke through.
"Why are you laughing?" Nino shouted.
"She…what?" Marinette questioned, smiling at them, "Or is Adrien doing it?"
"You're enjoying this!" Alya scowled.
"I told you, but you wouldn't listen." She sang.
"What is going on?" Adrien demanded.
"I'm sooooooo obsessed with you so I'm bullying Lila because we belong together and you will eventually love me." Marinette cooed.
Adrien spun around to the class, "Better question, what is wrong with you guys?"
"But she is!" cried Alya.
"No, I'm not." Marinette smiled, as her phone chimed, "Bye."
Alya stepped in front of her as she tried to leave, "No; we're gonna talk about this!"
"I talk. You never listen." Marinette stated, shoving her to the side, "Now, it's my turn to ignore you."
"So who is lying?" Ivan pressed.
Adrien growled out, "Lila is!" rushing after Marinette.
'Fuck! I need to apologize! Is this what she has been dealing with this whole time? I can't believe they think I would date her!'
Adrien froze on the steps, the class right behind him, as they watched Marinette kiss a guy on a motorcycle. Adrien felt himself tense up as he took in the guy's olive skin and black hair.
'How old is he? He has so many muscles! That shirt is a gift from God to show us what's under it.'
"I…..I don't think Adrien is her type." he heard someone speak.
"Neither do I." the model replied, moving towards them.
'Where can I find me one of those?'
As he reached them, the guy turned and glared him down.
'Uh, or maybe not.'
"Did you have a question?" Damian demanded.
Adrien quickly turned to face only Mari, "Where can I find a guy like him……but not so much of my father in the face?"
Marinette broke into a giggle fit, while her boyfriend looked at him confused.
"He doesn't like your glare, Habibi." Marinette explained, "His dad is strict with him."
"Physical?" He asked.
"No!" Adrien expressed, quickly.
Something told him that if the answer was yes, he'd be an orphan.
"Just…..has my life….structured." the model explained, attempting to ease the new guy.
Mari's boyfriend stared at him for a few moments and sighed, "I recommend Kon."
"Oooh!" Marinette smiled, "I agree. Adrien reminds me too much of Jon."
"Kon?" Adrien asked.
"Konner." Damian declared, "A relative of an…..acquaintance."
Mari smiled, "He's his best friend's older brother."
"And he looks like this?" the model asked, gesturing to Damian.
Marinette bit her lip to keep from laughing again, as she took out her phone and brought up a picture of them at a picnic. Adrien looked at the picture and saw how happy Marinette looked with her boyfriend.
"This one!" She said, zooming in on one of the guys in the background.
Adrien felt his cheeks flush as he stared at a guy with blue eyes laughing. He was wearing a leather jacket and a Superman shirt underneath.
"Sign me up!" Adrien said, trying to take the phone out of her hands.
"I'l let him know." Damian smirked, "Who knows, he might even visit soon."
Adrien froze, trying to figure out what he would say to him. He was too busy with his thoughts to see Mari get on the back of the bike.
"Bye, Adrien!" she shouted, as they drove off.
'Fuck! I could have asked her what he liked!'
"Dude, what was his name?"
"Yeah! How do they know each other?"
"How long have they been dating?"
"How old is he?"
"Give us the details!"
"Oh, I didn't ask." Adrien admitted, "I just asked Mari how I could get a guy like him and they recommended me someone they know."
"A guy?" Nathaniel asked.
"Yeah. He looked……..beef cakey? Hunk-able? " Adrien shrugged, "I think that was the word, right Nino?"
Everyone quickly turned to Nino. It was written all over their faces on how he could keep such a secret from them.
"A gym bro?" Nino questioned, cautiously.
"So, you like muscular guys?" Alix smirked, elbowing Kim, "If so, Himbo, but he didn't look dense. Ripped? Jacked?"
Adrien smiled, happily, "I don't know yet, but I liked what I saw when they showed me his picture and I'm willing to try!"
"What did he look like?" Alya asked.
"Uh…..if Marinette and Luka had a baby, but was a badass!" he announced.
"That's no help, whatsoever." sighed Nino.
He shrugged, "Makes sense to me."
"I'm confused." Rose admitted.
Adrien looked at her, confused as well.
"Why would Lila lie to us about dating you? Why would she tell us that Marinette came to sit with you, on your date, even after you told her to leave? She said that Marinette was following you to the movies and to your picnic spot and -" Rose was sniffling.
Adrien took a step towards her, "Lila lied to you all. I have no feelings for her, at all. If I spend time with her, outside of school, it's because it's for a photoshoot and my father asked her to be there. I have asked him to find a new model because I know that Lila likes me. I've rejected her over and over again."
"Lila didn't lie about Marinette stalking you!" Alya cried out.
Adrien looked at Alya as if she was speaking a different language, "Did you see the guy she just left with?"
Adrien lifted up his shirt to reveal a flat stomach.
"God painted that shirt on him!" the model shouted, "Hell, that God was ready to attack me for getting close to Mari! His abs summoned me to him! I would have left me for him, too!"
"Lila was very detailed about the dates, Dude." Nino winced.
"I dated Kagami, which Marinette helped me with. She even helped me plan some of those dates. Kagami said she even tried to help her work out why it didn't work so we could get back together." Adrien confided, "That doesn't sound like jealousy or obsession to me. Kagami calls Marinette her best friend and I happen to know that Mari goes to visit her and Felix, once a month."
"She said you reserved a resturant and took her-" Alix began.
"Anything I want to purchase has to go through Natalie. I have to explain how it's useful to me and why I want it." Adrien interrupted, "I'm lucky I'm not writing an essay. There's no way I could reserve a resturant and everything I eat is through a diet and portioned. It's why I go home for lunch."
The class looked at each other and he could see the doubt growing.
"What about the park?" asked Mylene.
"It sounds like a nice idea for a date, but I'm allergic to feathers and birds would likely try to get close to the food." the model confessed, "I did have a picnic in my backyard with Mari once. We played video games. It was after Kagami broke up with me and she was trying to make me feel better."
"Hah!" Alya shouted, "She was trying to get you to like her! It was a date!"
"Marinette kicked my ass at UMS3, constantly!" He shouted, "She told me to get better! She's reigning champ with Max! Kagami called her and she answered the phone. She destroyed me with one hand! If anything I got a crush on her, just from that!"
"You watched Solitude with Lila!" Alya snapped, "She said the director knows her, personally! You told her she was as great as the lead actress!"
Adrien turned to Alya and snarled, "Call that Bitch and tell her she is dead to me! She'll be fired by the end of the day from Gabriel, just for that comment."
Adrien pulled out his phone and called Natalie, "Send the car. Father and I need to have a talk. Immediately."
"Wait!" Alya panicked, "Why-"
"Learn how to use Google, Miss Reporter." He replied, "I know the directors, the lead actress, the costume designers; I know everything about that film. There are only two people I have watched that with. My father and Marinette, because she tried to help me escape to see that film in theaters. I only watch the first ten minutes with her before fans realized I was there and she had to help me escape again. Father had a copy at home. That bitch is nowhere as great as the lead actress and now she never will be."
The car pulled up and before it could even stop, he entered it and slammed the door. The class had never seen Adrien that angry.
Nino looked down at his phone and gasped.
"What?" Asked Nathaniel.
"Lila is fucked and she was definelty lying about the movie." Nino answered, "I guess we owe Adrien and Marinette more than one apology, especially her."
Alya grabbed his phone out of his hand and looked over the movie. The lead actress was Adrien's mother. His aunt was her stunt double. The Mayor helped direct the movie, along with Kagami's mother. Style Queen and Gabriel designed the clothes.
'That bitch is nowhere as great as the lead actress and now she never will be.'
"Alya?" questioned Nino, as he slipped his phone out of her grasp.
Alya opened her phone and selected Lila's name. She pressed call and put it on speaker.
"Alya!" Lila cooed, "Today isn't a great day and-"
"Today was interesting here as well." Alya interrupted.
"Alya, I need to-"Lila tried again.
"We all watched as Adrien eye-fucked Marinette's biker boyfriend. He asked them to set him up with a guy and he has a date planned with him already. He literally called her boyfriend a God and wanted to lick his abs. Also, Adrien said he would never date you, even if Gabriel forced him to. Oh, and before I forget, Adrien called you a Bitch. See you in two weeks, you liar!" Alya snarled into the phone and hung up.
Alya trembled as she fought against her sobs. She looked in the direction Marinette had ridden off into and wondered at what point she stopped believeing her. At what point had she started disregarding her best friend's words as nonsense. When had Lila's words become so much more important ad believable. When had Marinette stopped being her best friend and become Kagami's? How had she not noticed Marinette's taste for guys change so much?
"It's Friday so we have to wait until Monday to apologize to Marinette and Adrien." Max spoke up, "We can apologize about all assumptions we listened to and learn more about them."
"Assumptions?" Alya laughed, "We listened to Lila and never questioned anything she said! We became mindless zombies to her words! She said not to talk with Adrien and we never did! We could have asked and-we yelled at her so many times. She said it herself: 'I talked; you never listened.' ." as tears streamed down her cheeks.
Nathaniel sighed, "I don’t know if Marinette's friendship is something we can get back at this point. Alya's right. We listened to Lila and didn’t listen to Marinette's side of the story. When we did, we still believed Lila and called her a liar."
"She did seem happy to see us all confused." Alix admitted, "She reminded me of Chloe, at that moment. She was waiting for everything to fall apart and be blindsided. "
"No." Juleka whispered, "She wasn't like Chloe. She was worse and we made her that way. Marinette was our friend and we bullied her."
The class remained silent as the truth hit them hard. They had bullied Marinette and now she wasn't the same person they remembered. They knew nothing about her and wasn't sure if she would let them back in. They all looked at each other, understanding they all needed to let today's information sink in and walked away.
Marinette didn’t forget, she’s actually just kinda embarrassed about it. How is she supposed to casually mention a sculpture that was made by someone who was in love with her resides outside her front door?
Damian is just endlessly amazed by the details of her life.
Annnyywhoooo, my first daminette fanart easily became my most popular post in just a week… didn’t realize there was so many of us! All the notes are encouraging me to make more so I wanted to thank you all so much, I’ll definitely make more :)))
Tim cameo bc he’s my fav weirdo
Extra-
Damian: Since w h e n?
Tim: Uhhh, early Hawkmoth days. Kinda unfair, we’ve been around for decades and don’t have anything like that.
Steph (on call): Tim, the Wayne name is on half the buildings in the city. Fund your own and plant it outside Wayne Tower if it’ll make you feel better.
I have this scene in my head of a giant DC/batfam crossover where everyone in the batfam inherits Bruce's adoption tendencies and he has no clue what to do about it.
Like one day, the batfam find a homeless Peter Parker, end up doing a DNA test, and bam, it's Dick's son. He's around 14, and has that same sunny disposition as his father. The Wayne family has grown by one and they couldn't be happier.
Except... Jason has been acting weird lately...
At first, it was a little weird because he had been spending more time around the manor to see Peter. And then he stopped. Completely cut contact out of nowhere. Dick confronts him and finds a 16 year old Danny Phantom hiding behind his brother with the brightest, green eyed glare Dicks ever seen.
A month later a French class visits.
It's their last trip of their middle school year before highschool. 17 year old Damian Wayne walks in with a 12 year old Marinette who's small, nervous, and is so smart she skipped a grade. Damian is happy to announce that he has a new daughter.
