I need some fishy help...
I know I'm going to sound like an asshole and a massive idiot for daying this but...I don't love the fish that I have and I don't want to keep them anymore for the sole reason that they lack personality and won't get to know me and they're boring.
I have a Tiger barb (used to have 2 but Barbara mysteriously disappeared) and 3 Rosey barbs. They're pretty and I like them. But the reason why I started keeping fish again was because I needed something that would depend on me to survive because I was at a really low point in my life and i wanted to feel necessarh. I got a betta, then my boyfriend killed him by accident. Then two goldfish and I loved them dearly. They only recently died, so I got some barbs because my tank was empty. I liked to sit in front of my goldfish and watch them and they would swim over and pay attention to me sometimes and do that stupid food wiggle. I used my aquarium to help me relax and it was very therapeutic because I had something to watch and interact with a tiny bit. But these barbs do absolutely nothing. They don't recognize me and I've had them for a while now. They don't show any personality. All they do is swim. Like yeah fish swim, and they're energetic top, but...damn...they swim like robots. Idk how to explain it. They're almost ornamental. It's like fish tanks in the backgrounds of movies.
I can't keep certain fish. Guppies and danios and such are almost like decorations to lazy fish owners and they feel too easy for me. They lack individuality most of the time. These barbs too. They do nothing but swim around together. They don't approach me at the surface until the food is already in the tank. It's so dull. Sitting by my tank to watch them does nothing for me. It doesn't relax me. It just makes me feel guilty for buying these fish and not liking them like I should. I'm actually thinking of moving them to my 10gal to make room for a dwarf puffer. I'm craving an animal with intelligence (or an adorable lack, in the case of goldfish) with personality and indivitual traits. My two goldfish were very different. I even once had a shrimp that never jumped away from my hand like the others. But these barbs? Nothing. I feel really bad about it.
Don't get me wrong. I really do like these barbs as fish, but I'm not enjoying them as a hobby. And I keep fish as a hobby and a coping method for my stress and anxiety. So here's where you guys come in.
Got any cute barb facts or stories that could brighten up my opinion on my fish? I really want to enjoy them and they deserve more love than I feel towards them.