One in the S(h)ame - Chapter 8
The next round found itself beginning shortly thereafter. Yet another many hours of the torment that made up the between-life that they all had some to not accept but persevere through. The torment of the world was never-ending and thus forth they had to not end their efforts to make it to the next day.
Not that it mattered, really. Because this word was a sickening loop, a terrible game of Duck, Duck, Goose that ended in success and failure. If they succeeded, they would get to perceive another 'day' if they failed... well it was the same day all over again.
To 007n7, he knew that all of the days were the same day, perhaps it was a way for them to have some twisted semblance of hope that there would be such a thing as 'tomorrow' when it's been 'today' for weeks, if not months and yet it remains the same 24 hours it had been when they were there in this cursed realm the first time.
Tethered to a string and left reeling, trying to figure out which way is up or down, which way was freedom of imprisonment.
Despite of his awareness of the seemingly endless paradox, there was no end to the loop. No salvation. 007n7 found himself wondering if he was trapping himself in his own personal hell within this supernatural prison of punishment and terror. For, when he remembered something, sometimes others did not.
The others remembered when they succeeded during loops, however, they seemed to not recall dying. None of them seemed to recall the feeling of death, or the conscious awareness that- at that moment in time- they would not be even tasting a semblance of freedom before the void swallowed them whole.
007n7 found this out the hard way, when he recalled his own death on several occasions. The others always looked at him in a bit of a way that deeply communicated the absurdity of it all. A feeling of insanity in this prison of which freely withered their minds the longer they remained. To the other survivors, they had only been here weeks at best... perhaps 4 months.
The former hacker was subconsciously tormented by the fact that they had been here longer. That they had been through this time and time again. Like a record stuck on replay, a note stuck on repeat on the same pitch so indefinitely that one learns to tune it out if they're lucky.
007n7 stood where he spawned into the level, his eyes focused as he tried to locate the next generator. With how slow he was, he didn't move too fast. He needed to save stamina for when he needed to run. For when he needed to escape.
As the burger-bearing man looked around, he kept his hand splayed out to his side- ready over the holographic projection of a keyboard he kept bound to himself like a bittersweet, double-bladed lifeline. He could feel the thickness in the air, and the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. As if they were simply ready to fall out. Yet, the feeling never truly went away when the hairs touch of anxiety subsided.
007n7 frowns to himself as he contemplated his next move. The others had all separated, staying in groups of two... he purposefully separated himself from the others. He knew that Builderman and Shedletsky had told him to take care of himself- he appreciate every word. Every positive thing they said to him would stick forever...
As someone who's done nothing but wrong and fail in the past- he owed it to the other victims of this realm to take falls that they can avoid. He needed to help them get as far as he could- to be useful. To be someone that he can look at in the mirror and not see a failure.
'I haven't done anything in my life that is worthy of praise... and now that I'm beyond praise... what do I do?' the words were like a rat to a glue trap.. It's not quite enough to kill him but it's enough to make him wish he wasn't existent.
From one catastrophic failure to another he had left behind nothing but a trail of pain, misery, betrayal, regret, and shame. He had left behind pieces for others to pick up because he couldn't be bothered to be a better man.
007n7 would help everyone in every way he could, even if it did kill him. It's the least he could do for those he's met and those he's only recently acquainted.
These swarming thoughts ate 007n7 whole, drowning him every time he took a breath to ease up on the feelings of disdain he can't help but feel every time he thinks about his actions, or himself as a person.
It was like a prison in it's own- truly amazing how many prisons that 007n7's been in- considering that of mind, body and spirit. His own volition working against him like a boulder. The suffocating weight meant to consume him entirely.
Spotting a generator ahead, 007n7 got to work on it, taking a deep breath as he opened the hatch on the back and started to twist around the obscene rounds of cords that were a strew so carelessly. His fingers pinched one end, holding a clamp as he sought out the other half of said strand- working restlessly as he peers over his shoulder every half minute.
There were roughly 32 cords, as to why the hell there would need to be that many when other generators bore as little as 6 was baffling and haunting. It's as if the generators chose at random just how difficult they would be to handle- which in itself was a terrible thought.
"Come on... come on come on come on...." there were whispers- desperate pleas for this process to take less time than it was. A grim realization as he could easily tell that the world was mocking him.
Perhaps it was.
Ridiculing him for his slowness. Reminding him how easily he would be willing to destroy rather than repair something so simple. Destroying was always easier after all...
Slamming his hand on the generator, 007n7 grit his teeth as he growled in frustration. There was a heaviness to his shoulders... slouching as he realized that one of the cords was snapped and needed to be repaired. Just wonderful.
Leaning forward, 007n7 starts to wrap the cord around itself, looking to make sure it was secure and not ready to break down at any moment. Just as he got comfortable, there was a sharp feeling that shot up 007n7's back- making him let out a strangled yelp as he tried to keep from shouting.
The feeling in his lower back was agonizing- as if someone was taking a red hot blade to it. With such a sudden feeling he dismissed it.
"I need to stop bending over like this, it's ruining the disks in my damn back..." he fumbled with the cord again, before watching as the lights came back on with a flickering click. For a meager second, pride surged through him. One down, several more to go.
This feeling of pride was soon gut-checked and ripped from his very core as he went to move again and the red hot pain in his back shot through him again- this time more intensely than before. It had not been so intense before, just a meager feeling of numbness. Why now did he feel as though someone stuck a hot blade into his very core- and was trying to rip his spine from him?
Just as he let out another grunt, there was a shrill, animalistic growl that emanated from on the other side of the wall just 8 feet away from where he was crouched. A sound that shook him to his very being. One that made him feel light-headed and anxious. A feeling that he knew all too well...
Hearing the grass crunching under heavy legs as they dragged along and deep snarls that emanated from the core of something that can only be seen as pure evil, 007n7 knew exactly who was there.
Barely mustering the courage to look over his shoulder, 007n7's heart sank into the put of his stomach the second he saw the infamous yellow Robloxian, covered in corrupted code- staring him down from the clearing just across the way.
"J... John ... Doe..."
((To be Continued))
