#from drafts

[cringecorp]

was reading about tripod fish and i'm obsessed with this wording

[ricgraysonmemorial]

dick: yeah, back when i was undercover in the mafia. i went by crutches. because, you know... i pretended my leg was broke and used crutches.

damian: wow. very original, very creative.

dick, snorting a laugh: yeah.

jason, turning his head at break neck speeds: wait, wait- THAT WAS YOU?!

dick: ?????

jason, hand on his forehead: oh my GOD one of the bosses i was interrogating to get money recommended YOU for a job. his guy "crutches"

dick, face scrunching before his eyes go wide: TODD PETERSON?!

jason: BRUCE, HOLY FUCK!

bruce, still typing on his computer: what do i have to do with any of this?

jason: wasn't it... for you?

bruce, stopping: no?

dick: i was fully on the police force, undercover.

jason: jesus christ

[raindragon-20]

Sirius: Moons, if we ever break up, you can keep the dog. Remus: you…are the dog. Sirius *leans close whispering*: you can never escape me.

[n0n4me-jester]

this but your dog is actually an alien mecha

you just stand there, making some food for yourself, like always. except not really, because a whole ass Cybertronian is standing just outside your window. frame is not big enough for them to fit through much, but they still try, looking like one of those animals-trying-to-get-something-from-a-narrow-tube videos. you would have laughed but it would probably encourage them to try harder and you like to have walls in your home

Bot: do you need help?

You: there is nothing you could help me with but thank you anyway

Bot: ...you sure?

or maybe you go to your neighbor to ask them for something because stores are closed.

Neighbor: yes, i have some spare, but— hm

Bot: *stands behind you, towering over the house, looking intently*

You: oh, just ignore them, i don't even know why they wanted to come

Neighbor: oh, alright...

alternatively! humans are the dogs in this situation

humans would have it easier, i think. size advantage and all. you are definitely not required to fill out some cybertronian documents, but you climb up your metal friend and sit on their lap/shoulder pad, squinting at the data pad like you understand exactly what is says, sometimes glancing at their faceplate

or both of you are in their makeshift room on earth — still in making — as the bot moves around metal beams and slabs, assembling some size-appropriate furniture. they constantly look under their pedes, because you refuse to sit somewhere and just trail behind them as they work. you obviously can't help much in this situation. your alien friend says your company is enough

i like how this could go both ways depending on the perspective

[shaftking]

It sucks so hard that the climate crisis movement and it’s associated activism groups and figure heads has turned a lot of people away from environmentalism with their attitudes, actions, misinformation, and fearmongering. Environmentalism is a noble cause and we should be trying to lessen our negative impact on the environment and repair damage done to it but normies don’t want to be associated with the likes of Just Stop Oil throwing shit on priceless artwork and glueing their asses to roadways and they don’t want to be preached to talked down at by Greta Thunberg or some celebrity or world leader who expects them to live in the pod and eat the bugs while they fly on private jets with single serve plastic everything to ass pat each other about how much good they’re doing for the world.

[tehcherrya]

Why is Eregion so Christmas-y?

Lord of Holly-Land? And the Lord of Gifts? Elves in a Workshop?

Like, c'mon, it's the spirit of the season over there!

[moash]

veil was formed to protect shallan from the thoughts and memories she couldn’t handle. veil is the only one in the system we’ve seen openly profess an attraction to women. i’m connecting the dots.