my girlhood is a prison they don't want me to break out of

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my girlhood is a prison they don't want me to break out of
I want my boobs GONE I hate it all I hate this body it doesn't feel mine in the slightest 😭
I feel like I can't exist can't do shit please get me out of this cage it doesn't belong to me I am so extremely uncomfortable and in pain please make it all stop
the way gender dysphoria is lowkey just this empty fucking bottomless pit that can never be filled the way you want it to. it’s never enough for the dysphoria demon in your ear screaming that your chest isn’t flat enough or your voice isn’t deep enough and i’m TIRED
I'm so lucky to be a naturally hairy trans man. I'm not on T and I've been told my voice is decently masculine from voice training. I'm lucky to have a parent that buys me binders when I need new ones and I'm so lucky to have methods of getting facial hair. My dysphoria is still so bad, though and I still get misgendered almost daily. I don't know what to do and have no way of getting testosterone in my country.
no one ever talks about how much it hurts to be treated like you're made of stone when you transition. I still have feelings, I'm still human, you cant just tell me you hate me and wish id die, just because I'm a man. even if it's a joke. "Oh hes a guy, he can take it" have you considered that it hurts my feelings when you put me down repeatedly in front of everyone. being expected to just take the abuse shouldn't be part of manhood. friends should treat each other better.
time / geographically traveling forward to get bottom surgery cuz i need it NOW
do you ever see pictures of yourself as a kid and feel short of breath
but you just can't imagine living as a girl
Being trans at a pool party full of cis people is akin to those nightmares where all your teeth fall out and you’re naked and you’re also late for something important and