#fucking mood

[themoonandmyman]

Wanna know what line absolutely kills me?

‘I don’t want you to think she was weak. She wasn’t.’

It’s such a powerful statement that tells us so much about Ilya as a person and the kind of childhood and upbringing he was subjected to.

His mother’s suicide was an accident, his father said, and don’t you dare say it was anything other than that. His father and brother made sure to beat into him that emotions are weakness.

Sadness is a sign of something broken within you that needs fixing, and for all Ilya’s emotional growth, he internalised that.

We see it continue into the second book. Ilya keeps therapy a secret from Shane for months, not wanting to burden him with his illness. Hiding that part so he could ‘fix’ himself for Shane. So Shane would never know this vulnerability. So that Ilya could deserve him. Earn him, somehow.

Ilya doesn’t view what his mother did as ‘weak’- but he can’t extend that same understanding, that same kindness to himself. His mother’s son.

[simplepotatofarmer]

"I hate seeing the word accountability on the internet because most people don't know what it means. It's gone the way of 'woke' and 'feminism'. The actual culture and practice surrounding these terms have become a spectacle on the internet. Perverted by people who want to use it for their own violence. [...] Some people say 'accountable' when they really just mean shame. You want to harass someone, isolate them, abuse them, and still keep your high-ground and call it justice."

- shanspeare, when fans become incels

i highly recommend watching their video(s) but i liked this section because they go onto explain that accountability should be a tool to challenge harm and being responsible for your actions but that a lot of what's being done is actually punishment.

[youngpsichichugemuscle]

[hannahari]

being fucked so hard from behind and they lay on top of your back while they’re fucking you senseless and moan in your ear

[p3achj3llyf1sh]

Those new shadow forms, ey?

[mferallthegoodnamesaretaken]

Leviathan, singing: ~Hush, little laptop, don’t you cry.~

Leviathan: ~I'm gonna find you some more Wi-Fi.~

Leviathan: ~And if that Wi-Fi doesn’t work…~

Leviathan: ~I will destroy the fucking Earth.~

[von-trips-diaries]

February 22, 1948, Sunday

Wolfgang von Trips Diaries

Lazed around in my room all day, listened to the radio, wrote letters. It was incredibly cozy. But too lazy, I need to be more active. More energy, do more, at least do tasks properly, I was slowly getting lazy about it. "O Jesus Christ

[casstorff]