Slappin’ Hams

Follows from my main @raccoonboywrites

[themoonandmyman]

Rowan, 29. He/him. Queer.

MINORS GET OFF MY LAWN.

[themoonandmyman]

Does anyone want to give me money for being sexy and poor and disabled

[djbodyhorror]

your mom jokes don't work when you know someone too well. I would never be in bed with such a wicked woman. That's not even what I had your mom saying last night. I wouldn't speak to her.

[themoonandmyman]

the only philosophical school of thought that has any real merit to my life is Absurdism. which im sure is obvious

[satyriconmp3]

me after making horrible posts all day: who wants me 😏

[anya-rozander]

🤎

[themoonandmyman]

I love to be able to say I’m descended from witches and it be actually, factually true. granted my ancestor was executed and he was also off his absolute nut which they might have assumed at the time was The Devil but was probably actually schizophrenia….

[ayeforscotland]

This is the Witches of Scotland Tartan, designed to memorialise those who suffered as a result of The Witchcraft Act between 1563 and 1736.

The Black and Grey represent the dark times of the period as well as the ashes of those burned. But what’s incredible here is the thought put into the thread counts.

1563 and 1736 are both shown through the thread count and the white check of 3 threads represent the Witches of Scotland’s main goals of ensuring a pardon, an apology and memorials.

An apology was secured by both the Scottish Parliament and the Church of Scotland. and a legal pardon was consulted on but as far as I’m aware hasn’t been implemented.

[themoonandmyman]

Thinking about Shane learning the Russian words for ‘my little bear’ because Ilya’s so large and imposing but so soft and his hair is so fluffy- but he also delights in knowing he can use it on Ilya to needle at him and sweetly annoy him. He can imagine Ilya’s faux-irritated brow crease, followed by wrestling Shane into the couch to prove he’s no little bear- he’s a grizzly bear who’s going to eat Shane for breakfast…

So he works to get the pronunciation down, and finally springs it on him one day when Ilya’s just come in from the lake, hair air dried and floofy and he’s all open limbs and soft edges.

The moment the words fill the space, Ilya goes silent, and tears start to fall. Shane panics, and closes the gap between them to hold his husband close with a crushing grip.

‘What’s wrong? Did I not do it right? Did I say something bad?’

Ilya stays quiet for a moment, trying to control the inevitable break in his voice when he speaks. When it comes out, it’s wet, and wounded, like blood seeping out the mouth of an injured animal.

‘No, no. It’s ok- my mama, she-’ another small sob. ‘She used to call me that. I have not heard it in a very long time.’

Shane knows he doesn’t need to reply, or to fill the following lull.

He just needs to stand there. Solid and unyielding.

Arms a vice around Ilya’s torso, large hands stroking down the damp skin of his back. Soothing kisses pressed like a comforting brand to his temple, his cheeks, his eyes. Urging the tears to flow because they need to. Loving his man exactly how he needs to be loved.

[pudulogy]

[wagyubeefs]

“the fandom has decided - ” “everyone agrees that - ” “we all know that this is the only right way to - ”

[not-roboto]

Screencap painting from "The Waitress is Getting Married" ( 9" x 12", Oil on canvas panel)

(Inprnt!)

[lizardsfromspace]

How many old technologies do YOU recognize? Nobody is old enough for all of them!!!

DVDs

VHS tapes

Vinyl (before it became cool again)

Rotary phones

Whale oil lamps

Magic lantern shows

Gutenberg press

Horses

Antikythera mechanism

Fire

ANSWERED YES TO ALL TEN? CONGRATS, we've finally tracked you down your immortal life-sucking bastard. Hunters of the Order will descend on your lair imminently, since you weren't even using a VPN

[morganasmissus]

just realized that Heated Rivalry came out after October. which means this year will be Shane and Ilya’s first kinktober. everyone hold on

[themoonandmyman]

my Alive Wife keeps haphazardly stepping out into traffic so she can be part of a montage sequence… but we don’t even own white sheets …

[nonlynear]

the phrase “[blank] is kind of a dead wife” is becoming its own dead wife

[themoonandmyman]

this post is a kind of Alive Wife

[yourbestclothes]

hi I rly need some help! as you might know, I’m currently living off social security disability income as I spent the last three+ years doing intensive medical treatments for treatment-resistant depression and was unable to work. my SSDI payment is barely more than my monthly rent, and my account is always negative by the time I get it, so I cant ever catch up.

I’m moving at the end of August to a place with lower rent, so my financial situation should rly improve by September, but I’m still $415 short on rent this month. I’m feeling very overwhelmed, and rly need community support. if anyone is able to help at all, even just sharing this post, it means the absolute world. I don’t have much to offer, but I will happily make you a collage in exchange for any donation ❤️‍🩹

thank you for any love, kindness, & support.

Venmo / PayPal

$0/$415

[yourbestclothes]

$375/$415 ❣️