Pairing: Michael Schumacher x Victoria Morrison ( Original female character )
Summary: World champion Victoria Morrison, who finished her career as a Formula 1 driver, is now a Mercedes team engineer. However, her life is not as smooth as it may seem at first glance. Michael Schumacher, the man who knew and supported her since childhood, dies. Their relationship could not be described, they did not fit into the normal framework and this left an indelible mark on her life, will she be able to go on if there's someone who needs her?
Warnings: slow burn, age gap, implied grooming, A LOT of pain, body Dysphoria, Past character death, past trauma, cheating, betrayal, destroyed friendship, unrequited love, violence, death, +18 content: SMUT, sexual language, alcohol/drug abuse.
Notes: I think it's a huge oversight that there's literally no story about schumi, so it's time for me to take matters into my own hands. (!) In my story, Mick died without ever waking up from his coma. (!) English is not my native language, so please forgive me in advance. I would appreciate it if you could correct my mistakes. I don't know what this story will turn into, as this is my first time sharing my work, so please don't judge me. Also, the main inspiration for this work is Lana Del Rey's song "Dark paradise", so please, if you are not familiar with this masterpiece, listen to it before reading. With love, your Ari.
Tags: Original female character, Michael Schumacher x oc, Sebastian Vettel x oc, Kimi Antonelli x oc, Friends to lovers, Angst, Slow Burn, Daddy Issues, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Explicit Sexual Content, Drunk confessions, Drunk Sex, Secondary romantic plots, Gender inequality, Many nicknames in German.
Evening after qualification.
-You’ve messed up! what do you want me to say? As your engineer, I'm not satisfied.
Victoria knew that she would hate herself for these words.
-listen Kimi, it's hard, I know, just exhale, okay?
In fact, she herself needed to breathe out, sometimes it seemed to her that with age, she did not acquire a gram more skills in the matter of consolation, rather over the years you are filling more bumps and someone else simply has no strength and desire to share. But because of him, something has changed in her, for a long time she has not let anyone new so close to her.
-Every day I doubt more and more, at first, they just assured me that I...
the Italian suddenly fell silent, not finding words or not wanting to say what was sitting in his head.
- Everyone puts so much hope, so much effort is invested in me and my success, and what I give in return, I... I don't know...
Victoria doesn't let him bury herself further, she just can't let it happen, a warm palm covers the boyishly rough skin and intertwines their fingers together.
-This is called growing up, Kimi, and you're just entering it, you know, I still haven't figured it out, and my age is much older than yours, no matter how much I want to deny it.
Here it is. A quiet laugh came out of his lips and involuntarily made her corners rise.
-You know, I was not too far from you when I got behind the wheel of the car and made the same mistakes, even your beloved Max. and where are we now?
And suddenly the warmth, so bright and piercing to the heart, that it becomes scary - Kimi head rests on Victoria's shoulder, leaving only the curly top of her top to be seen, and her hands instinctively wrap around his body. The dark and detached hotel room doesn't seem so sullen anymore. How it happened, no, how she allowed someone to go so deep into her heart, it's not clear, but it was probably useless to deny it, Kimi Antonelli, an ambitious, young driver of the Mercedes team, became too dear to her. And she was need to avoid pain by all means.
A deaf phrase uttered into her skin left a mark on her soul. Yes, Victoria knew perfectly well firsthand what a bitch life can be.
- Words. Watch your tongue, young man.
Victoria spoke quietly, without any severity, only her eyes could give away the pain that she never stopped feeling. Phrases, facial expressions, behaviour and even the damn choice of drink, she involuntarily projected his opinion, without thinking uttering his phrases, because he was everything. This is an unfair betrayal of fate, which she was never able to survive. However, this red-cheeked immediacy gave hope to heal at least a small part of a huge rotting hole , called a heart.
Two weeks before the Australian Grand Prix.
Victoria was the first female racer in Formula 1. Young, ambitious, ready to tear apart, yes, this is the image she created throughout her career, but did anyone know her well enough to see that this is just a mask, hiding fear and uncertainty, accumulated by years of humiliation and claims to her achievements by people around her. The media is far from the best friend for any driver, starting with karting and ending with the queen of racing, and for a girl with the surname Morrison, the media became literally a sworn enemy. And if as a child, the mother tried to protect her child from the annoying attention of reporters, then at an older age, when it was necessary to climb higher and higher, it was impossible to get away from the always uncomfortable and painful questions. "Will you use your father's name, 2-time world champion Thomas Morris, to advance in this sport?" Or "Your family is not afraid that this story may end in the same way as it was tragically interrupted at your father's on the track"... Over time, she learned to ignore tactless questions, stuffing all her memories and feelings deep inside, letting them decompose inside her, but before that it was still a long way...
- You are important to them, not the other way around. Remember that. If you are silent and show your detachment, they will ask more convenient questions, everything, so that you give them at least a grain of material"
Always right. Damn, Victoria really doesn't remember a single case where he suck, and it's annoying and comforting at the same time. But… Good to know that there's someone who can guide you, say how best, at least she thought so. Only now, his own words, contradicted his actions and this nazoil desire to point it out to him did not give her rest and broke out of it.
-And yet you prefer to send them.
Roughly. It wasn't just a discussion, no, it was a debate that grew rapidly.
-Just because I'm doing it doesn't mean it's good for you. You're a different person and you should have a completely different approach.
Here it is. Different. This is what made Victoria have to behave not like all the other drivers, what distinguished her from them. She’s a girl.
-But I'm not like that, Michael, the same questions all the time, these damn reporters are just fucking trying to prick me hurt every time, as if they have some kind of argument there.
Her chest was up, fingers were shaking, and treacherous tears came out of Victoria’s eyes. The wind literally broke through, as if wanting to pull all the insides out of the exhausted body.
-Words. Watch your tongue. You're not a farm daughter.
He looked with the usual reproach, as a parent, serious, but something in his eyes did not give her rest. Carefully leaning on the edge of the balcony, she buried her face in her palms.
-You have the right to answer them, you have the right to be yourself, you have the right to be... damn it, just to be in your place. The little girl in Formula 1, who came out in the name of her father, without talent... yes, I guess they are right, if I collapse so easily under their onslaught. The truth hurts more, doesn't it?
And then, only a little shuddering, she feels her shivering back, a surprisingly warm hands holding her shoulders tightly. It's a familiar feeling.
-Schatzi. Whispering with a strong rough bass, which makes goosebumps run down the skin, calms the British.
-They are nothing compared to what you have already achieved and will still achieve. You know it can be difficult, but you're a strong girl, aren't you? So let the whole world wait.
Her body literally automatically turns and presses against him, and her face sticks into his chest, hot tears still break out and flow in hot jets down her cheeks, but it doesn't hurt so much, not when there is someone next to you who knows and understands your feelings.
- Let's go out, Vicky, you're all shivered.
There was a quiet whisper, Michael's lips leaned against the top of her head, and then the warm figure slowly withdrew. She didn't have time to notice how his hands gently raised her face, and then his fingers, rough, but at the same time so gentle, wiped the streams of her solo tears.
- That's it, Mein Mädchen.
Victoria did not even realise that this was only the beginning of her journey, for her, as for many people of her age, the whole life was concentrated in one time segment that had just begun and it was too early to think about its end, so many moments she looked at for the first time. Scared and knocked down, but there were always hands to help her up.
