Introducing… funny shit my Neuroscience prof has said, part one!
These are all real (somewhat out-of-context) quotes from last semester. Proceed with caution.
-“The nursing department is full of APA nazis. If you’re a nursing major and you forget a comma in your citations, you’d better bend over, because your grade is coming at you fast and hard.”
-“Why were the Harry Potter books so poorly organized? They should have been called Hermione Granger and the Two Blundering Idiots. That one with the quidditch should have been called Harry Potter and the Spinal Cord Injury.”
-“GUTS. Repeat after me. GUTS. This is a dissection lab. If your table is sticky, someone didn’t clean sheep juices off their workstation properly. Oh, and always look before you sit down.”
-“Class, repeat after me. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, IT IS NOT AN AMINO ACID!”
-“Quokkas. Ever seen a Quokka? They’re adorable. Honestly, we should just move all of the Australians out of Australia and rename it Quokkaland.”
-“We’re going to focus on a sensory neuron that is already familiar to us—the FREE NERVE ENDING. You may recall from our unit on the Integumentary System that these guys are responsible for temperature and also PAIN. Interesting that a pain receptor would be involved in the withdrawal reflex, isn’t it? Interesting that I already have told you a little bit about it. It’s almost like I knew this day was coming! Whoa, like prophetic powers. WOW.” (He has no chill)
-“So these are the glands that produce sweat—because, unless you’re Prince Charles, humans sweat.”
-“…so, I stab you with a nail and you say “Grandpa! Why did you stab me with a nail?” And I say, “I’m testing your reflexes, it’s an important neurological diagnostic procedure GIMME YOUR OTHER HAND!”
-“I shouldn’t have to tell you this because you’re supposed to be mature adults, but please don’t take freaky photos with the skeletons and post them to social media. Our class has a bad track record with this and it’s unnecessary. Imagine explaining to Granny why your feed has a photo of you doing the nasty with a skeleton?”
[below is an obligatory skeleton pic because why not]
