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July 24, 2019
My life changed.
In early March i decided to do something major. I decided to start the process of getting a gastric sleeve.
So, Wednesday, July 24th i had the gastric sleeve done. I was discharged yesterday and have been home since. It's amazing how quickly everything changed. A glass of water that i really wanted to drink has taken me several hours to finish! One protein shake that I've finished within the hour, i'm still drinking. And i'm not even half way done!
So this is my first update post op. There will be more to follow!
At 101kgs, this is what my arm, with all its excess skin (and fatty tissue) looked like. Imma make this my starting point, because I’ll be working on tightening this shit up!
6 weeks post-op
Tomorrow I will be 6 weeks post-op. Which also means I’ve worn out my FMLA and will be returning to work in the morning. I am becoming more comfortable with the fact that I had surgery, but I’m not so sure I’m ready to face all of my co-workers who will be asking where I’ve been and commenting on my very obvious 30 pound weight loss since they last saw me. I’m also terrified of becoming fatigued while standing on my feet for 8 hours for the first time since before surgery. Normal housework still wears me out to the point where I need to sit down after 10 minutes. My bosses are less than understanding about things like that.
About my 30 pound loss...
I lost those 30 pounds just days before hitting the one month mark. Which means I have been going to through this plateau for about 3 weeks now. Three long weeks and my scale hasn’t moved. I know this is normal and my doctor said I am still right on track with my weight loss regardless of the stall. But it is still very frustrating to see and I’m so afraid that I’ve lost all of the weight that I’m going to lose from surgery. She suggested I add a little more protein each day as well as more physical activities. I will do what I can and hope for the best.
I can also now fit into my “second goal jeans”. I nearly cried when putting them on yesterday. I have not been able to fit into them in 8 years. While putting them on yesterday I was telling myself, “Okay, I know these still don’t fit. I just want to see how tight they are so I know how much more I have to go before they fit.” But then they buttoned. They are the tiniest bit snug, but I can still definitely wear them. I am so ecstatic about it. It seems to make no sense to me still. I can’t imagine myself in smaller clothes. I can’t see myself going into a store and buying smaller sized clothes for the first time in at least 6 or 7 years. I will always have a fat girl’s mentality.
I am doing my absolute best sticking to a 1/2 cup of food at a time like my doctor said, but I feel like an hour after a meal, I am absolutely starving again. Just a week or two ago I had no interest in eating because it was more of a chore than anything. My food rarely gets stuck anymore because I feel I have mostly mastered eating as slowly as possible with chewing my food until it’s basically gone. I just hate feeling so hungry all the time.
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Heyyy, all!
My name is Marissa. I’m 25 years old and I just got bariatric sleeve surgery. I’m desperately seeking a community where I can talk to other BS patients about the struggles, maybe giving and receiving tips & ideas for food.
Hoping I can find some lovely people who feel like listening to me.
I’m gonna start making videos, I think, just tracking myself and I’ll be uploading them here. The blog is a little bare right now as I am about less than 3 weeks post-op. Hopefully I can build it into something awesome.
Please feel free to follow me! I also have a personal blog and that one is called paper-love.tumblr.com. I don’t post much there anymore but... yeah, every now & then I get bored and look at memes and shit.
Hope to speak to some of you lovely people soon. Gracias.
x
Marissa
Feeling Down after Mistake
Yesterday I made myself sick-not on purpose, but regardless, I made myself sick. I had eaten a cookie and I felt okay, so I did the wrong thing and ate two more. I dont know why I did that to myself. I should’ve known better. Today I’m a little down, as a result of that. The negative thoughts started creeping in, phrases like, “How can you be successful at weightloss if you do stupid shit like that?” Or, “You deserved to get sick.” Occasionally, I’ll hear the voice of ED (eating disorder) saying, “I wish you’d thrown up those cookies, you shouldn’t have eaten them. You need to lose more weight. You haven’t lost enough.” In reality, though, I’ve lost 30.7 pounds since October of this year. I’ve done really well. I may have only lost .2 pounds this week, but I lost weight, regardless! I know what an uphill battle weightloss has been for me, so I fucked up once...I’ve learned my lesson. I plan to start working out again this weekend, which should jump start the bigger losses again.
#mondaymotivation - “If you really want to improve your situation, work on the one thing over which you have control – YOU.”
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