I've been playing with some ideas and since I have a big fat crush on a freaking cockroach I'm going to take my chances and write something.
This is the prologue of a set of ones shots, scenarios and things like that I will make about the characters of monsters Vs aliens.
(don't completely remember the dialog so please don't be to judgemental)
(Y/N) works as some kind of counselor/inner relationships/jack of all trades in the Area fifty-something.
Basically helps the monster adapt to the new environment once they are caught and deals with Mongers shit when he doesn't feel like it.
They've been working around there for more than two decades so they get along and know the monsters pretty well by this point.
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It all started with certain wedding that went wrong. The bride to be, Susan was hit by a meteor that turned her into a giant lady.
Susan woke up in an unknown place, terrified and confused she started assimilating where she was at. She was in a big room and there was a table. A tube from the ceiling dropped some kind of yellow slime and a giant spoon.
While approaching said table, she heard some strange sounds around, which only added to her fear. Finally she saw something peeping from behind the strange gelatine in the table.
It looked like a very big cockroach but with some humanoid features. The insect came out from his hide, looking curious.
He finally spoke "Hello" He was cut out by Susan's scream. The girl already overtaken by fear, proceeded attempting to smash the insect with the spoon.
The monster tried to explain himself "Madam!!" Susan started swinging her spoons as a weapon "Will you stop?!" The insect asked as he was attached to the spoon "MADAM PLEASE". Susan kept hitting the insect with the spoon while he tried to reason with her. "Will-" *smash* "you-" *smash* "stop!-".
With one final blow, Susan left him senseless in the table.
The cockroach twitched his body slightly and while trying to maintain balance he said "Whatever mad scientist made you, he really went all out" after that, he finally collapsed on the surface.
"This is not happening" Susan whispered to herself. Meanwhile, the girl stepped on a blue substance with one eye that's talked to the woman "Hi".
The blue goo was thrown to the table where the cockroach had already straightened himself.
"My back!! You broke my back!! Just kidding I don't have a back " The liquid/solid creature said jokingly.
The cockroach, looking unamused responded " forgive him, but as you can see, he has no brain"
Turns out you don't need one, completely overrated. As a matter of fact I don't even *wheezes* I forgot how to breath. I don't know how to breath" *wheezes*.
Rolling his eyes up, his companion responded "suck in BOB" the doctor looked like he was stored of reminding him this.
'BOB' did as he was told and seemed to be finally able to breath " This guy's a life safer".
Suddenly, something green and scally landed in front of Susan grabbing her by her face.
"Wow, look at you. I know what you're thinking. First day in prison and you want to take down the toughest in the yard. Well, I'd like to see you try" said a fish like monster .
He started doing some kind of martial arts movements? Well, at least until his back cracked and he fell to the floor muttering. He recovered almost immediately and said smugly "look, she's speechless".
The other two individuals went to the floor as well
"Wait, did you say she??" BOB asked, who was quickly answered by the Dr "yes BOB, we are in the rare presence of a female monster"
"And a giant one that's for sure" an unknown voice said right next to the doctor, startling him.
The doctor jumped slightly in his place as he quickly recognised the owner of that voice.
The person who just made themselves known was a human. At least it appeared to be one to Susan. They dressed formally but wearing messy hair and a pair of eye bags. Nonetheless, the sly smile on their lips showed their satisfaction for frightening momentarily the Cockroach.
"Oh! This is (Y/N). They have a habit of scaring the living daylights out of everyone here!" He said while glaring daggers at the only human in the room.
"A human!!" Susan asked alarmed "Thank god, what is happening what is this place"
"Well, first of all, welcome to your new home, or prison as my boss insist" the person started approaching them with confidence. "Darling, you are now property of the government, you were before but now it's more noticeable for you" a little laugh came after that statement.
"I'm here to help you assimilate this unfortunate situation just as your other companions here did" Said Y/N trying to explain to the new recruit their new situation. Susan looked like she wasn't listening, as if she was in trance.
The monster were as if they were debating trying to make a good impression on the new one and commenting on what kind of monster they wanted her to be. Meanwhile the only human there intervened in the debate as well.
Finally, they all turned their attention to the giant woman in the room and Dr cockroach asked her "might we ask your name, madam?" A soulsess "Susan" was the only answer he receive from her.
"No, no we mean like, your monster name. What do people scream when they see you coming" BOB explained " like: LOOK OUT, HERE COMES..." he left the sentence unfinished so she could do so. He was met with the same answer as before.
"Really?" The bug man said looking back at their human companion. Y/N nod their head "Her name is Susan but as far as I'm aware the government has renamed her as Ginormica" she said stepping closer to the insect looking at the notes he was making.
Headcannons:
You've been there long enough to know the majority of area-fifty something employees.
You got along with the monster pretty quick since you were curious about them and they were lonely enough to appreciate the company.
When the invisible men died, Dr cockroach, Link, General Monger and you made a silent pact of not telling BOB about it. Eventually once he started asking for the whereabouts of the monster, you told him that he manages to escape and the rest of the monster just went along with it.
At your first few years on the job, you also acted as a part time assistant for Monger. He basically treats you like a kid since he's much older than you but trust you enough. He knows your trustworthy.
Monger let's you go on the passenger seat of that car he moves with inside the facility.
Dr cockroach was very pleased when he found out that you wanted to know about his experiments and how invested you seemed in his explanations. That made you develope a quick but firm friendship with the doctor.
We all know that Link cheats with the help of Insectosaurus when playing cards. BOB is painfully unaware of that fact. You still play with him though.
Once you catched on how he was constantly winning (which wasn't difficult) you learned how to use your own tricks. This made Link competitive so he started developing new ways to cheat (now it's a vicious cicle)
BOB is just happy to have s new friend and just as the other two, you indulge him in whatever he wants to do. Playing catch the ball with his eye is funnier than expected.
Susan was relieved to see you in between the freak show that is area fifty-something. You became her sanity very quickly until she regained her own confidence.
Girl nights are now a must. BOB is sometimes included in them.
This is all for now!!!! I think this movie is really underrated and I've also been watching the series and it's not that bad. A lot of jokes are hilarious and the dynamics are pretty cool.
I will be making more headcannons or one shots. If someone wants an specific one, please ask. Love you guys 😘😘
[The main five monsters, the Invisible Man, and von Wolfmann stay together. Meanwhile, Monger and the Cyberian work to rob and sabotage the new alien-run government.
"That was somethin', wasn't it?" - Monger, after emerging from the water.
"Countries steal from each other. They just use beautiful words." - Monger]
[Alone during a mission, Susan tries to contact Dr. C via walkie-talkie to learn his whereabouts, but his walkie-talkie died earlier to their unawares. She is found by an alien spacecraft, which abducts the quantonium. He learns his walkie-talkie is dead and rushes to find her. She is devastated and believes there is now little to nothing she can do to help Team Monster.
"Susan, my dear, what can I do?"
"Leave. Just leave."]
[Susan is still given missions, albeit appropriate for her human height. She and the Cyberian unexpectedly reunite while both are searching for the lost quantonium, the Cyberian for weakening the alien government and Susan for returning to her 49'11" size. And they both find it. Desperate and embittered by the misfortunes that have come upon Team Monster since shortly after Susan joined, the Cyberian refuses to let her regain the quantonium.
"So you think stopping me will make you happy?" - Susan
"Nothing could make me happy now. Now give me that capsule!" - The Cyberian]
Also, Derek's in this a/u somewhere. And yes, he's still a selfish jerk.
Unfinished? WIP? Idk, you tell me. Again, this is only segments
So many years together has made the core monsters inseperable. If something affects one member, it affects the group.
All. The. Monsters. Are. Family.
It takes Susan a while to understand inside jokes and past incidents because of being the most recent addition.
There are Other anomalous creatures kept in Area 5X, but they are either non-sentient and/or are too dangerous to be kept around the more human-friendly monster group.
Area 5X is so gotdang big because they were expecting a lot more kaijus like Insecto to crop up. Sadly not many have surfaced to justify the space.
There’s a hangar in Area 5X full of wrecked UFOs. Some are spacecraft wreckage while others are stuff like weird meteors (Susan’s is in there), and at least one alien creature that got crystallised upon entering Earth’s atmosphere.
There’s significant difference in staff employed at different points throughout the past 50 years. There are far more women on the Area 5X worksheet than back in the 50s, and the guards are generally more sympathetic towards the monsters. Many modern staff members have been reprimanded or let go for failing to uphold secrecy, or for unnecessary cruelty towards the monsters.
Budget cuts were a legitmate concern up until the Battle of Golden Gate Bridge. The facility was far more barebones and sterile before the government had to formally recognise Area 5X’s importance. There have been a lot of redecorating at the facilty since the fat checks started coming in.
Putting individual characters under read due to length.
Susan:
Enjoys many hobbies considered stereotypically feminine; baking, sewing, cosmetics, etc...
Grandparents and extended family are farmers or are atleast connected to the business. Modesto is the agricultural centre of California after all. Her parents were the first of their generation to go against the mold and seek out white-collar careers.
Studied cosmetology in school and was working at a beauty salon to save up for her and Derek’s wedding.
Is very athletic and grew up doing a number of physical extracurriculars like cheerleading, dodgeball, and roller-derby.
Grew up being teased for being the shortest kid in her class/family. They still tease her for it.
Greatly fears causing collateral damage and/or harm to others through her size.
Has issues with anxiety, worsened only by her new job as “savior of earth”. She wishes for a confidant to tell her worries to.
Married life with Derek was doomed to fail. Susan had a plan in place for what came after the marriage, and focusing 100% on Derek’s career was not it. There’s also the line from Derek’s mother about Susan being “the weatherman’s wife”, implying that she was to be the homemaker and not have a career of her own. It’s possible that Susan was planning to settle down and have kids with Derek, but the lack of control she had in moving to Fresno implied that more was going on.
Is currently “taking a break” from love and dating, despite gaining many new admirers.
Tries her best to return to Modesto to visit her family and friends whenever possible, though work often keeps her away for weeks at a time.
If she retains her height-shifting abilities as in the series; Susan goes through really bad “growing” pains.
Link:
Was frozen in his relative late-teens during a cold snap. Got shifted around until he ended up somewhere in Greenland before being discovered by modern humans. Post-thaw he went a bit wild, swimming frantically back south to try and find his old enviroment.
Was one of many scrappy youngsters in his troop, with a number of adoptive parents. The strongest ruled the troop, and Link was fairly weak in comparision to the leaders. He had gotten into a fight the day of his freezing (over something silly in hindsight) and swam away to sulk. When he didn’t return after the cold snap - the troop accepted that he had likely died out on his own.
Likes to freak out humans by making up weird biology facts about his species and ones he’s fought against - like joking about laying eggs or having his tail dettach and regrow like a lizard. However there’s some things he has to ask about, because he doesn’t have medical knowledge or words to describe something.
A lot of his macho behavior came from imitating the guards who kept watch on him. 1950s violent military alpha males aren't a very good role model for someone who doesnt know what societal norms are yet. Link was a lot more insufferable back in the day but chilled out as he began interacting with other walks of life.
Has a high paternal instinct and immediately becomes softer around kids and smaller animals.
Has body language similar to a cat/alligator. Slaps his tail when angry or in deep thought. And yes; Link purrs/rumbles when happy.
Loves monster movies - especially the ones where the monsters “win”. He cried when he saw “Beauty and the Beast” and then immediately booed loudly when the Beast turned human.
Does Not Trust doctors or scientists due to bad past experiences. Will only go to Dr Cockroach and Monger if he ever gets hurt/ill. Gets stressed fast if he has to be in a waiting room or doctors office.
Link had no idea what gender indentities or orientations were until recently - he did come from a pre-human civilization that really didnt mind/care about the schemantics. It took him some time to wrap his head around it. He identifies himself as bisexual after much thought and many hours alone on the computer.
Don't press him about his body. He's built different from humans and cis people. He will punch anyone who doesnt respect his or anyone elses identity.
Has been in love before. It didn’t end well.
Will occasionally wear clothes, but finds it a challenge to find anything that fits him. Will give any shoes he finds to Dr Cockroach and BOB to eat.
The best driver/pilot out of all the monsters.
Dr Cockroach:
True name is Jaques-Yves Herbert. Prefers to just go by "Dr Cockroach" because he dislikes the association with his birth family.
Picks up human languages very easily, although not as quickly as he can understand animals.
Parents were a mixed scientist couple. His father was an aggressive “Strong British Man” that would beat him son down for not following orders or for not meeting his standards for a man. Dr C turned down both chances to attend his parents funerals.
This man isn’t straight. He probably uses old-fashioned slang when asked about romance such as; “I am Uranian” or “I wear a green carnation”. It took Susan a few times to realise what he meant, as she is used to a more open minded enviroment.
Got the idea of transforming into a cockroach from reading Franz Kafkas “The Metamorphosis” as a child. He sympathized with Gregor’s abusive situation, and began considering the possibilties of how one could survive better as a creature like a cockroach.
Studied in biology and entomology in the Uk before moving to the states to follow engineering. Obtained his degree in Dance as a “side gig” in University.
Has been barred from free access to the coffee maker/machine due to overnighters. Once stayed awake so long that he forgot the letter “R”.
Owned a terrarium of Madagascar Hissing Cockroaches throughout college. He mourned each of them when his roommate’s iguana got into the tank.
Was a "beatnik" back in the day and still kinda is. Embraces and encourages modern counterculture as he himself was not given such acceptance in his youth. He has however shamefully eaten his old Lenny Bruce album.
Hasn’t actually aged physically since his transformation. He attributes this to the fact that certain athropods can’t age physically beyond maturity. Link is very jealous.
Has obtained more degrees while in captivity, as Monger allowed him access to research and learning materials. He has however had his allowances revoked for previous escape attempts/doomsday devices.
Does still enjoy human food, but the cockroach instinct of "eat detritus" tends to overrule his eating choices. Can’t cook either.
Ironically a terrible driver. The damages from previous drives has made Monger restrict him from operating even a razor scooter.
BOB:
Pretty much considers himself human. Was created by them, raised by one (Monger), and talks like one. Gets sad when he's reminded that no other humans are blue blobs like him.
Absorbed some dna from the scientists present at his "birth", leading to his eye, speech, and omnivorous diet.
Doesnt actually need to breathe (as he can just absorb oxygen through his mass) but the fact that humans Do means that BOB thinks he has to as well.
Shares some physical characteristics with tomatoes/nightshade plants, as he is technically half tomato. He refuses to eat tomatos for this very reason, considering it cannibalism.
Attracts garden pests looking for a tomato plant. This unwittingly makes BOB a pretty good bug zapper.
Still retains his "mental broadcast" ability from "BOB's Big Break" although at a more subtle level. He tends to parrot the things he accidentally "eavesdropped" on.
Is empathetic, and can tell when others aren't doing ok emotionally. Will flop down on someone who’s really sad to comfort them. No brain, only heart.
Best cook out of the monsters. If he doesn’t forget what he’s making at least.
"Whats a gender? Can I eat it?"
Insectosaurus:
Core body is that of a Japanese Silkmoth, although she ended up being spliced with other animals present on the island during her initial mutation; namely ants and ground squirrels.
Eats over a literal ton of mulberry leaves per day. Also enjoys oranges.
Secretly wishes to be more humanoid.
Was only able to pupate and transform due to physical trauma. It seems that her transformation was like a “power-up” that required her to be in geniune distress for it to activate.
First language is Japanese. She learned it from the intial recovery team, and later developed an understanding of English from years in Area 5X.
Goes into torpor in cold weather. Pretty much impossible to wake her up for missions during Winter, as she needs to “rev up” before becoming mobile.
Still very much Link’s best friend. Still enjoys sports, chicks, and beer.
Monger:
Full name is; Warren Rex Monger.
Is very protective of the monsters and will defend them to the death.
Pretty much raised BOB (as seen when BOB was a baby blob in “Night of the Living Carrots”), and considers him his “freaky gelatinous son”.
Has a reputation of being a “control-freak” due to his aggressive overseeing of the monsters’ containment. This toughness is partly because of incidents that occured without his knowledge. Lets just say some scientists have been wedgied/fired for running experiments on the monsters without Monger’s approval.
Has a very “Ron Swanson” emotional response and view of the world. Crying is acceptable only at funerals and at the Grand Canyon (if he hadn’t lost his tear ducts in the war).
Has been married multiple times. Will not confirm or deny if he is currently seeing anyone.
Invisible Man/TiM:
Legit got out but no one at Area 5X is sure how. He suffered a geniune medical emergency and disappeared after surgery. The other monsters were informed that he died from complications to deter them from getting escape ideas.
Is able to be detected in Infrared light. Dr Cockroach managed to rig up goggles to view TiM in case of injury and to foil pranks.
Was a scientist working on an invisibility potion for the military and used himself as a guinea pig. Hasn’t actually been able to replicate his results since - thinks the effect may have been caused by a genetic abnormality.
Dr Cockroach and him are massive rivals. Both actually met eachother pre-transformation through a CalTech expedition. This makes the pair one of few people that have seen the others human face.
Is 100% naked. Was forced to wear clothing once this was discovered.
A massive prankster and a cynic. Him and Link were a force to be reckoned with.
Has revisted the facility multiple times and has started a number of ghost stories.
Any additions are welcome! I proably have alot more to dump about. Might make one of the alien characters from the series
