Who I Was (MarkxReader) Pt.6
Pt.1, Pt.2, Pt.3, Pt.4, Pt.5 , Pt.7
“Sora’s here.” I said, when I got back into mine and Harper’s room.
“What?” Harper jumped off the bed, surprised. I ran to the door, and looked in the hallway, seeing Mark and Sora walking down it. “What’re you going to do?” Harper asked, looking as well.
“Definitely not continuing whatever this is.” I say, closing the door, and sitting on the bed.
“You can’t really take anything back.” Harper said, sitting next to me.
“Don’t you think I know that?”
“I swear, you better not drag me into this.” Harper sighed, falling back on the bed.
There was knocking on our door, so I went up to get it. Jackson busted into the room as soon as the door opened.
“Sora’s here, so you need to be extra careful.” He said, running his fingers through his hair.
“What did you say?” Harper asked, looking at Jackson.
“Huh? Oh. Nothing, I just, uh nothing, it’s nothing.” Jackson said, trying to play it off like it was nothing. I guess they don’t know that they both know about what’s going on.
There was an awkward silence for a second, before Jackson quickly turned around, and tried to leave the room. By doing so, he ran into Mark, who was just about to knock on the door.
“I thought you were going on a walk.” I said, eyeing him.
“Yeah, I told Sora to meet me in the lobby. Can I talk to you for a second?” Mark asked, ignoring the other two in the room.
I looked at Harper, then back at Mark. “Uh, sure.” I said, trying to act nonchalant. He pulled me into his room, and let out a big sigh.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know she was coming on tour.” He said, talking really low.
“It’s fine, we shouldn’t have done anything anyways. I shouldn’t have let it go this far. It’s my fault.” I said, looking at the ground.
“It’s not your fault, we can still-” Mark started, but I cut him off.
“Mark, she’s your girlfriend, whatever this thing is between us, it needs to stop.” I say, pointing between me and him. “I’ve been cheated on before, and it sucks. I don’t want her to go through that.” At this point, tears were stinging my eyes. He tried to reach out to me, but I pulled away. “You still love her, I can tell, so be with her.” I say, a tear escaping my eye. I wiped it away angrily, and crossed my arms. I knew this would happen, so there’s no reason to cry about it, but I can’t stop.
“Don’t cry, please.” Mark said, holding my shoulders.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have even gotten attached like this.” I said, looking away from him. “I’m just going to go.” I pushed him out of the way, and left the room quickly.
I immediately go and find Jackson, him usually being the person I go to when I’m feeling down like this.
“Are you okay?” He asked, already waiting for me out in the hall. He pushed himself off the wall, and made his way over to me, pulling me into a hug. “What did Mark talk to you about? Sora didn’t find out did she?” He asked, quietly.
“No, but can we just go get some ice cream or something? I need to get out of here.” I asked, pulling away from him, and sniffling a bit.
He nodded, understandingly, and we both walked out of the hotel towards the nearest ice cream place. Jackson bought the ice cream for me, and we sat at a table inside.
“So, you wanna tell me what happened now?” Jackson spoke from the silence.
I let out a long sigh, and looked at my ice cream. “I told him to be with Sora.” I said, sadly.
“Oh.. I’m sorry.” Jackson moved his chair so he could sit beside me, rather than across from me. He put his hand on my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me.
“It’s stupid. I shouldn’t be this upset, but I am. I’m the one who put this on myself.” I said, hanging my head down low.
“It’s not stupid. You did put it on yourself though, but it’s not stupid to feel hurt about it.” There was a short pause, before he stood up. “Let’s head back. I’ve got a concert tomorrow. We should both get some rest.” Jackson said, putting his arm around my shoulders.
We both walked back to the hotel in silence. Since Sora was here, she slept in Mark and Jackson’s room, and I had to stay in my actual room for the night. Harper was already in the bed when we walked into the room.
“Hey, you okay?” Harper asked, peeking her head from the covers.
“Fine.” I answered simply, before throwing myself on the bed. “I just wanna go home.” I say into my pillow.
I felt Jackson pat my head. “It’ll be okay. It’ll all work out.” He said, before leaving the room.
The next morning, the boys had rehearsals before the concert today, and we all decided to tag along, since it was either that or stay in the hotel all day. I avoided Mark the whole time. Anytime he would come up to talk to me, I’d either walk away, or pretend to be busy with something and ignore him. I could tell Sora noticed his efforts in trying to talk to me, she didn’t look too happy. I went over, and sat next to Harper, to avoid anymore awkwardness.
“So, what happened last night?” She asked, as soon as I sat down.
“Nothing, I just told him to be with Sora. It was the right thing to do.” I mumble, barely audible for her to hear. Mark and I made eye contact, but I quickly looked away.
“Hey. Don’t the boys dance really well?” Sora said, sitting next to us, and admiring the boys on the stage.
“Oh, yeah. I wish I could dance like that.” Harper said, laughing a little. How can she act like nothings going on so well?
Sora was about to say something else, but she got a phone call, and excused herself from the room, walking outside and answering the call.
When she came back, she had a fallen face. She sat back down, and let out a long sigh.
“What’s wrong?” Harper asked, watching her, concerned.
“I have to go back to Korea tomorrow morning. Twice has a music bank to go to, and I have to be there.” She said, sounding sad.
I couldn’t help but feel a little happy about this. I had to remind myself that nothing between me and Mark can happen.
“I have to call my manager, and ask him to book me a flight home.” Sora sighed, looking at her phone. “Damn, my phone just died, I forgot to put it on the charger last night. Can I borrow yours?” She asked, looking up at me.
“O-oh, yeah, sure.” I said, handing her my phone from my pocket. She unlocked it, and looked at the screen for a second.
“Why is your lockscreen and home screen both pictures of Mark?” She asked, looking at me, confused. I must’ve forgotten to change it back. Harper stared at me with wide eyes.
“Oh, he took a bunch of pictures on my phone one night, and changed all of my backgrounds and stuff to his pictures. I haven’t gotten around to changing them yet...” I recovered, looking away from her like it was no big deal. I prayed that she didn’t go throw my texts, if she did, then we’d definitely be in some big trouble.
“Hm, okay...” She said, eyeing me suspiciously. She dialed a number, and got up to talk to her manager.
“Really, (Y/N)? Why didn’t you change it?” Harper whispered/yelled at me.
“Look, I wasn’t thinking about it, and the pictures are just really cute.” I pouted.
“Look, you say nothing can happen between you guys, so you need to start making some changes, and that would be one of them . The other would be being friends, and not trying to avoid him, because that makes it obvious.” Harper said, looking at Mark, and then back at me.
“I know.” I say in a small voice, looking at the ground.
“Thanks for letting me use your phone.” Sora said, plopping next to us, and handing back my phone, leaving everything silent and awkward again.
Practice ended, and we all had to go backstage for the boys to get ready for the concert. Sora sat down beside Mark, and sighed.
“So, I have to leave tomorrow morning.” She informed Mark, as he got his hair done.
“What? You just got here though.” He said, not able to look at her, since his hair stylist would hit him for moving.
“Yeah, but Twice has another thing to do, so... Yeah.” She said, looking sad. Mark looked at me through the mirror for a split second, before he went back to focus on Sora.
“I’m pretty sure we’ll have a lot of time together when I get back home, don’t worry.” Mark said, trying to make her feel better.
After the boys got finished getting ready, it was time for them to go out to perform. The three of us watched the concert from the wings of the stage. I hadn’t realized I was staring at Mark, until Harper nudged me.
“You’re staring.” She said, simply.
“Sorry, you’re right.” I say, quickly looking away.
“Jeez, pull yourself together, okay? He’s not worth it.” She whispered to me.
Throughout the concert, I noticed Mark stealing quick glances at me. He would smile every time our eyes connected, but I tried to ignore it. Once the boys got off the stage, and the concert was over, I went to Jackson to congratulate him on doing a good job. I looked over at Mark as Jackson was talking, to see him spinning Sora around in a hug, smiling and laughing.
“Can we go back to the hotel now, please? I’m exhausted.” BamBam whined, already getting out of his concert clothes.
“We should go before he gets naked.” JB laughed, leading us out of the building, and into the van.
When we got back to the hotel, Mark and Sora had pushed passed everyone, making their way to his room quickly, hand in hand.
“Well, I guess Sora is finally going to say yes to Mark tonight.” Jackson sighed.
“What do you mean?” I asked, looking at him curiously.
“Mark has always asked Sora to have sex with him, but she wouldn’t do it, because she’s never done it before.” Yugyeom chimed in.
“Oh, I see.” I say, looking down at the ground, again. It pisses me off how he can just do these things so easily, even after everything that’s happened.
“We should all hurry and get packed, we’ll be moving to a new state tomorrow.” JB said, getting into the elevator, with us following behind, and pressing the button to our floor.
“Since my room is being ‘used’, I’m gonna head down to the gym, and work out for a bit.” Jackson looked at the door to his and Mark’s room, and sighed.
Harper and I went into our room, and started packing in silence. That silence didn’t last long however, as we could hear literally everything that was happening in Mark’s room beside ours.
“Oh my god, were we that loud?” I asked, making a disgusted face.
Harper nodded, making the same face as me. She quickly took out her speakers, and played music, drowning out the noises. “Normally, I’d hang out with Jackson, but since he’s working out, and we have to pack, we just have to bare with it.” She sighed.
~~~ I’m bad at transitions~~~
“Bye everyone, I’ll see you in a few weeks.” Sora waved goodbye to us, as her taxi showed up to take her to the airport. Mark kissed her for the millionth time today, before she got in the car.
“Bye babe.” He smiled at her, and waved as the car drove off. Everyone went back inside, and as I turned to go in as well, Mark stopped me, and made me face him. “Look, I’m sorry... I shouldn’t have moved on you like that last week and stuff...” He paused for a second.
I couldn’t bare to look him in the eyes, so I looked anywhere but him. “Yeah, no, it’s okay... It’s not like it meant anything or whatever.” I said, crossing my arms.
“Yeah, it’s just, like now that me and Sora have gotten out of that weird awkward stage, it’s like I’ve found my soul mate.” He said.
I raised my eyebrows in shock, and slouched a little. he did not just say that to me. I must be hearing things.
“For someone with a soulmate, you sure did have sex with me.” I said, almost too loudly.
“Yeah, I know, but like... I didn’t mean to say that.” He said.
I turned away from him, and started walking in the opposite direction from the hotel, angrily.
“Wait, where are you going?” He asked, curious.
“On a walk.” I said, angrily.
(Y/N) had been gone for a while, I was starting to get worried. After about two hours, I got up to tell Jackson that she hadn’t come back to the room at all, but as soon as I opened the door, she was standing there, about to put her key card in.
“There you are. I was getting really worried. We’re leaving for the airport soon.” I said, opening the door fully so she could come in.
She walked in without a word, and gathered the rest of her things that she hasn’t packed yet. She was silent all the way to the airport, and even on the plane. Jackson noticed how quiet she was being as well, and tried to talk to her a few times, but couldn’t get even one word out of her.
When we made it to our new hotel, (Y/N) basically locked herself in our room. She wouldn’t come out for literally anything. It was depressing, and I felt extremely bad for her. Thinking of a possible solution for this mess, I quickly went over to Mark’s room, and knocked on his door.
“Oh, do you want Jackson?” Mark asked when he opened the door, seeing it was me.
“No, I need to talk to you.” I said, pulling him out in the hallway. “You need to talk to (Y/N), she’s been moping around this whole trip, and it’s just sad. She’s a mess, all because of you, and you need to fix it.” I said, sternly.
“Alright, I’ll talk to her, but what am I supposed to say without making her mad?” Mark asked, a little hesitant. “Oh, hey, yeah, I know we had sex and all, but can you just act like we didn’t? We can still be friends.” He acted as though he was talking to (Y/N).
“Look, you don’t have to be rude about it, just try to talk to her. She’s really hurting, Mark.” I say, practically begging him to talk to her.
“Ok, ok, I’ll try, but I might just make it worse.” Mark said, walking past me, making his way to my shared room with her,
There was a knock on the door, but my energy was too drained to get up and answer it. But when I didn’t, there were only more knocks to come. I sighed, and went to the door to open it. When I saw Mark standing there, I turned around, and let the door close in his face. He caught the door before it closed, however, and let himself in.
“Go away.” I say, laying back down in the bed.
“No. We need to talk.” He made his way over to the bed, and sat next to me.
“What else could you possibly want from me?” I asked, scooting away from him.
“I just want to talk.” He says, scooting closer to me.
“Fine. Make it quick, I’m busy.” I say, sitting up.
“I feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately.” He started. To that, I laughed. It was quite the understatement of the year. “Can we just put the whole thing behind us, and go back to being friends?” He asked, looking at me hopefully.
“Friends? I don’t think so.” I said, shaking my head.
“Why?” He asked, confused.
“Why? Why he asks. Maybe you haven’t considered this, but I actually cared Mark, you actually meant something. And yes, sure, I knew you were taken, but that’s beside the point. It’s hard to be friends when the person you love is in love with someone else.” I said, not really thinking about the words coming out of my mouth.
Mark stared at me, surprised by my outburst.
“What did you just say?” I asked, pointing at him.
“I didn’t say anything, you said-” He started, but I cut him off by quickly standing up from the bed.
“No, that’s not, no. I didn’t mean that, that was nothing, just forget it. No, nope. No. No.” I said, leaving the room quickly.
I ran out of the hotel as quickly as I could. Mark caught up with me half way down the street. He’s much quicker than I am.
He grabbed my wrist to make me stop, and face him. “I didn’t know you felt that way.” He said, trailing off his sentence.
“Felt what way?” I asked, pretending I didn’t know what he was talking about.
“Can you stop that?” He said, giving me a look.
“It’s not like you care anyways, I was just some toy to you, that you could just easily throw away. Besides, you have your soulmate now.” I said, shaking my arm away from him.
“If I didn’t care about you, then I wouldn’t have done any of that stuff with you.” He said, almost angrily. “You think I meant that soulmate bullshit? I said that to convince myself, because I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“Oh really?” I crossed my arms, unable to believe him.
“Because, it seems that way to me.” I said, tears rolling down my cheeks by now. I tried to walk away again, but he pulled me back, hugging me, and I let him.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered. He lifted my chin so I would look at him. “I really am.” He said, before he leaned in, and kissed me as passionately as he could.
We both heard a click of a camera, and pulled away from each other, seeing some photographer smiling at us, evilly.
“So, who’s this? Someone’s a cheater.” The paparazzi said, amused at the situation.
“Delete that now.” Mark said, angrily.
The paparazzi shook his head, and laughed. “No way kid, this is gonna get me paid.” He said, before jogging away to a black car, and driving off quickly.
“This is not gonna end well at all.” I said, holding the bridge of my nose. Why do I keep letting these things happen?
“Come on, let’s just go back to the hotel. We’ll figure something out.” Mark says, leading me back to the hotel. By the time we got back to the room, I was on the verge of a panic attack. As soon as I saw Jackson, I ran to hug him, and burst out in tears.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, holding onto me tightly.
“Me and Mark kissed, and this guy took our picture, and now it’s going to go everywhere and Sora’s gonna find out.” I said all at once, while sobbing into Jackson’s shoulder.
Mark tried to come up to me, and comfort me, but Jackson held his hand up to him. “Don’t you think you’ve done enough trouble tonight?” Jackson says, a little too harshly.
“This is America, it’s not like the photo will be published in Korea right away.” Harper says, getting her phone out, and looking through the internet. “Oh my god.” She says in a panic.
“What?” I look up at her, tears still streaming down my face.
“Nothing, everything’s fine, it’s, what? Nothing. Like Mark who? Am I right?” She said, throwing her phone behind her. Her phone started ringing, but she wasn’t even attempting to answer it.
“Your phones ringing.” I pointed out through sobs.
“I don’t think it is.” She said, scratching the back of her head.
“Yes it is. Answer it.” I sniffed.
“...No.” Harper said, shaking her head.
“It’s stressing me out more, just answer it.”
“I’ll answer it.” Jackson said, letting go of me, and picking the phone up. “Hello.....? Oh, hey, Sor- Man.” He said into the phone. “Woops, can’t talk now, bye.” Jackson said really fast, before hanging up, and throwing the phone back down. “It was that guy, that was like... Just come here.” He gave up on trying to explain, and pulled me into a hug again, trying to calm me down.
“Mark, you gotta fix this.” Harper said, running her fingers through her hair. Mark’s phone started to ring nonstop. Sora was blowing his phone up with texts, and calls, but he refused to answer.
The boys barged into our room, bombarding us with questions, which was only making my panic attack worse.
“Everyone, outside, now. Harper, you and (Y/N) stay in here. Feed her something, and get her some water.” Jackson ordered, before pushing all the boys out into the hall.
“How’d you let this situation get so out of hand, Mark. I’m so disappointed in you.” JB says, crossing his arms, staring Mark down.
“I don’t... I don’t know.” Mark hung his head low, avoiding the eyes of all the boys.
“I swear to god, you need to fix this.” Jackson said, crossing his arms.
“How!?” Mark yelled. “She’s seen it, I imagine she’s super pissed, and never wants to have anything to do with me. There’s no way to possibly fix this.” He said, thinking about what to do, and letting out a long sigh.
“You need to talk to her, or something. Make up some story about how (Y/N) wa having a panic attack, and you didn’t know what to do, and freaked out.” Yugyeom suggested, not wanting Sora’s heart to be completely broken.
“I say, let her break up with his dumb ass.” Jackson said, rolling his eyes at Mark.
“Just call her, and tell her the truth, there’s no need in hiding anything.” JB said, handing Mark his phone.
Mark took the phone, and called Sora. She picked up on the third ring, making Mark even more anxious once he heard her voice.
“Sora...” Mark sighed, looking at the boys. JB ushered everyone out of the room, to give Mark privacy. Sora didn’t say anything, but Mark could hear her sniffling.
“Sora, I’m so sorry-” Before he could continue, Sora butted in.
“You should be sorry, Mark. Is that why you were acting weird when I showed up to surprise you?” Sora was almost yelling through the phone.
“No, that was the first time.” Mark lied.
“You know lying isn’t going to make this any better. Tell me right now what you guys have been doing.” Sora said sternly.
“If you lie to me, we’re done.” She said, cutting him off again. Mark was silent, hesitant to say anything. “Okay, whatever, why don’t I just end this, and you go do whatever the fuck you want with (Y/N).” Sora was crying now, and Mark could tell. It broke his heart to hear her suffer like this, but he knew what he did was wrong, and now he’s paying for it.
“If I tell you, then you’re going to break up with me.” Mark said, quietly.
“If you don’t tell me, I’m going to break up with you anyways, so.”
It got quiet for a few seconds, before Mark took a deep breath. “We had sex, okay? Is that what you want to hear?” Mark said, his voice shaking.
“How many times?” Sora asked, not really wanting to hear the answer.
“The whole first week... Everyday before you showed up. I was desperate, we hadn’t done it at all, and we’ve been dating for so long. I needed it.” Mark tried to make an excuse, but Sora wasn’t listening. Mark could hear the sound of Sora’s phone hit the floor.
“Sora will have to call you back later.” Sana said, after picking her phone up. She hung up the phone, before Mark could say anything.
Mark let his arms go limp by his side, while the boys filed back into the room. “Well?” Jackson asked, crossing his arms. Mark shook his head, and left the room quickly.
“I guess it didn’t go well.” Youngjae says, looking at the door.
“Whatever, we’ll deal with this later. Remember, we’re still on tour, so we have to focus on that.” JB said. “I’ll call the manager, and see if he can do anything about it. In the meantime, get ready for practice.” He pulled out his phone, and left the room as he called their manager.
“I’ll go talk to Mark.” Jackson said, starting to leave the room as well.
“Don’t be too rough on him, okay?” BamBam spoke, before Jackson could fully leave the room.
“Don’t be too rough? He used my best friend as a sex toy for a whole week, threw her away like she was nothing, now he does this? I’m going to be rough.” Jackson said, leaving the room angrily.
