i think it's important to discuss the sinblings reaction to getting lost in a Mall for example lucifer is lowkey highkey freaking out because his dysfunctional children are Lost mean while Satan and Asmo are taking selfies at the food court (asmo is actually the one taking selfies satan is just reading on his d.d.d. and sipping a SinbucksTM tall iced coffee and watching Luci lose his shit)
As always, you are a genius. OKAY……………………. here we go. this was. supposed to be funny… but we all know I can’t go for very long without making Lu Upset, lmfao
(The first part of this is a fic, then I do a bulleted run down of who’s doing what where)
Lucifer Loses his kids The Rest of The Sinblings in the Mall
Lucifer had higher expectations for his family than this, but honestly at this point he’s not sure why. Is it his pride? Most probably. Right now he’s sorely regretting having any faith in any of them at all. He’d taken a phone call from Diavolo for five minutes and his siblings had all collectively decided that his instruction to wait for him in the closest seating area was too boring to follow, and subsequently scattered. Lucifer’s heart doesn’t seize at the sight of the common area distinctly devoid of his family. He simply takes a deep breath in and holds it for the count of seven, then releases it. Then again. Until he feels better.
He’s not panicking. He’s simply gathering his bearings.
Just because he cannot see all of them at once does not mean that something unspeakable has happened to them, they’re all grown, and some of the strongest demons in the devildom besides. He doesn’t have to worry. They’re fine.
(But what if you’re wrong, the insidious little voice that haunts Lucifer’s nightmares sing-songs in the back of his mind, What if you’re too late again? What more of yourself do you have to give in exchange for their safety?)
After allowing himself a moment to pinch the bridge of his nose and mourn a time when they were all too small to properly defy him, Lucifer unlocks his phone, sends a quick message to the group chat to report their locations (no matter how doubtful he is of receiving any actual replies), and starts making his way through the mall at a sharp clip. The crowd parts before him, either out of deference to his person and position, or simply because he’s exuding such an energy that if one were to get in his way now it would spell certain death.
It’s fine, he reminds himself. Even if none of them respond with where they are, he will find them. And once he sees that everyone is… Accounted for, he’ll be able to… Well. He won’t ever enjoy being in the mall, but at least he won’t be plagued by annoying thoughts outside of the norm.
Asmo will be easy enough to track by his Devilgram, so all he has to do to find them is wait. Leviathan is either in the collectibles store arguing with the clerk (again) or he’s in the Game Stop… arguing with the clerks. Again.
Mammon could be anywhere, which certainly doesn’t make Lucifer’s hackles rise. (It’s FINE.) Satan’s whereabouts are slightly less of a mystery (there is a Sinbucks attached to the mall, after all) but his hunch over his location isn’t enough to quell the… annoyance… he has over not knowing for sure.
Lucifer would have to be a complete moron to not check the highest concentration of food for Beel, so that’s simple enough, and Belphegor is rarely far from his twin–certain… time spent in undisclosed attics notwithstanding–so logically, it’s the food court is the best place to check first. He sighs.
Best get to it then.
—
Where Did They All Go?
Mammon - currently neck deep in the clearance rack at Hell Aeropostle. Which is to say. Regular Aeropostle. Lucifer goes through half the mall before finding him because, literally, Mammon could be anywhere though. He managed to buy a shit ton of new discounted stuff before Lu found him and confiscated his credit card for Disobedience.
Leviahtan - actually was in the GameStop Devildom Edition arguing with another demon (not an employee this time, way to go Levi) about the merits of Overtale as a game. Levi is let off the hook because they actually replied to the GC with something, even if that something was ‘in an argument with a stupid normie, but what did i expect? i left the house’
Satan - was in fact in Sinbucks, reading on his phone and having a good internal chuckle at Lucifer’s distress. Lucifer walked by the glass partition wall between the sinbucks and the rest of the mall about three times before he noticed Satan there.
Asmodeus - went from whatever the equivalent of lulu lemon is, to a boba tea place, to sephora, where Lucifer found him giving himself a makeover. How else is he supposed to know exactly which shade of matte lipstick compliments his skintone the best if not like this??
Beel - as expected, was in the food court. He has an arrangement with lots of the vendors there that he’ll buy out whatever they have that isn’t selling well, so he’s rather popular there instead of feared. the foodcourt is probably about as close to heaven as he’s gotten in a very long time, haha. Lucifer doesn’t even really punish Beel because he’d mentioned going that way before Lucifer took his Very Important Diavolo Phonecall. He still feels a little bad about how he probably made him worry, though.
Belphegor - Asleep in the common area chair where they first were told to wait. He never moved, Lucifer just couldn’t see him in his dumb panic. Technically can’t be punished since he followed Lucifer’s instructions, which makes him really smug about the whole thing. Lucifer almost wishes he’d gone somewhere just so he could have the satisfaction of it.
pros and cons of dating Trafalgar Augustin and Indy Maxwell?
Trafalgar
Pros:
She’s fun! Work is stressful and serious enough. She doesn’t need that in her personal time.
She’s up for just about anything (or nothing, if that’s what you’re feeling)
She’s great at reading people and will probably know what you need before you do
Cons:
You’ll probably never learn her real name or anything about who she really is. But she’ll feed you plenty of fun BS.
She’s horrible at flirting, so hopefully you made the first move or are equally bad at this whole romance thing, so you don’t care.
She may or may not be on the run from every major galactic power.
Given her line of work, you might only be “dating” and she’s actually trying to get a secret out of you/using you as cover/thinking about if she’ll need to kill you
Indy
Pros:
Also super fun. What does the apocalypse mean to her? There are still good times to be had and she’s determined to find them.
Ever thirsty? She’s bound to have a Nuka Cola or thirty on her person at any time, so she’s got you covered.
She has a knack for finding and bringing out the best in people.
She’s rich. She grew up in an old Nuka Cola bottling plant, so she has caps to spare and she’s happy to spare them.
She’s a genuinely good and giving person. She might seem a little… out there at times, but at her heart, she cares about making life better for others.
Cons:
So, her definition of “making life better” might include mass volumes of Nuka Cola and Nuka related gear. She’s on a mission to collect every bit of memorabilia that she can, so if you’re not to keen on being surrounded by Nuka knick-knacks, you might want to run screaming within an hour or two of being around her.
Though she seems to be blessed with luck, it might be because she’s somehow sucking all the luck out of the environment around her. Get used to explosions, flying bullets, and sudden visitations from deathclaws/radscorpions/super mutant suiciders/every other nasty thing the Wasteland has to offer.
@hellishhurricane tagged me in this fun little thing! <3
1st: tag 9 people you’d like to get know better: anyone who likes can do this! I’d like to know more about all of you!
2nd: BOLD those statements that are true for you
APPEARANCE:
I am 5'7" or taller
I wear glasses
I have at least one tattoo
I have at least one piercing
I have blonde hair
I have brown eyes
I have short hair
My abs are at least somewhat defined
I have or have had braces
PERSONALITY:
I love meeting new people
People tell me that I’m funny
Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me
I enjoy physical challenges
I enjoy mental challenges
I’m playfully rude with people I know well
I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it
There is something I would change about my personality
ABILITY:
I can sing well
I can play an instrument
I can do over 30 pushups without stopping
I’m a fast runner
I can draw well
I have a good memory
I’m good at doing math in my head
I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute (i’m honestly not sure?? I haven’t been swimming in ages)
I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling
I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch
I know how to throw a proper punch (yes, in theory, but it hasn’t been tested, haha)
HOBBIES:
I enjoy playing sports
I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else
I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else
I have learned a new song in the past week
I work out at least once a week
I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months
I have drawn something in the past month
I enjoy writing
FANDOMS ARE MY #1 PASSION (hmm, maybe just in terms of liking to lurk. i don’t like being any sort of presence)
I do or have done martial arts
EXPERIENCES:
I have had my first kiss
I have had alcohol
I have scored the winning goal in a sports game
I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting
I have been at an overnight event
I have been in a taxi
I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year
I have beaten a video game in one day
I have visited another country
I have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts
RELATIONSHIPS:
I’m in a relationship
I have a crush on a celebrity
I have a crush on someone I know
I have been in at least 3 relationships
I have never been in a relationship
I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them
I get crushes easily (nah people are turds)
I have had a crush on someone for over a year (long time ago, yes)
I have had feelings for a friend
MY LIFE:
I have at least one person I consider a “best friend”
I live close to my school (in terms of where i went to college at least!)
My parents are still together
I have at least one sibling
I live in the United States
There is snow right now where I live
I have hung out with a friend in the past month
I have a smartphone
I have at least 15 CDs
I share my room with someone
RANDOM SHIT:
I have breakdanced
I know a person named Jamie
I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce (not that I recall at least)
I have dyed my hair
I’m listening to one song on repeat right now
I have punched someone in the past week
I know someone who has gone to jail
I have broken a bone
I have eaten a waffle today
I know what I want to do with my life
I speak at least 2 languages
I have made a new friend in the past year
