During one of Cait’s early book club chats, she was asked if she could direct any past Outlander episode, what would it be? She said the Helwater episode. Now correct me if I’m wrong: while she wasn’t in the episode, she was on set that day, yes? Check out her answer 😏 I think there were ulterior motives for wanting to direct the episode.
La manera en que Jamie besó a John en Jamaica es la manera en que quiso besarlo en Helwater
"Grey sintió las grandes manos cálidas sobre la piel de su rostro, ligeras y fuertes como el roce de una pluma de águila, y luego la suave y ancha boca de Jamie Fraser tocó la suya. Hubo una fugaz impresión de ternura y fuerza contenida".
"Caminando en silencio, me acerqué. Enmarcado en la puerta entreabierta estaba Jamie, con la cabeza inclinada mientras apretaba a Lord John Grey en un ferviente abrazo".
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The way Jamie kissed John in Jamaica is the way he wanted to kiss him in Helwater.
"Grey felt the big warm hands on the skin of his face, light and strong as the brush of an eagle's feather, and then Jamie Fraser's soft wide mouth touched his. There was a fleeting impression of tenderness and restrained strength."
"Walking in silence, I approached. Framed in the half-open doorway stood Jamie, head bowed as he squeezed Lord John Grey in a fervent embrace."
Summary: Jamie Fraser is tired of lying. So he goes to see a Priest for guidance and absolution.
For the "Bless Me Father For I'm About To Sin" Square in the @outlanderbingo2020 Challenge.
I just saw 3x03 and I wondered if you could tell a story about what would happen if Frank did agree to a divorce when Claire first suggested it.
I have something that might fit here - MBD
Her words echoed in his ears as he crept across the quiet grounds trying desperately to calm the ever present pounding of his heart. Jamie had tried to concoct a myriad of different ways to get himself out of this mess, but he could think of nothing convincing.
“Come to my room…”
The words haunted him all the way up the winding path from the stables, and his quarters, up to the large manor that hovered over him. The french doors with the long panes of glass sat to the left of the prominent side block of the house and Jamie shimmied through, opening the door only a little and sliding through, making as little noise as possible in his bid not to be caught creeping into the house at such an hour.
He didn’t want to bed Geneva, but nor did he wish to be caught loitering around Helwater in the dead of night with no honourable explanation as to his presence in the main house.
The stairs, thankfully, were lined with carpet meaning his boots didn’t click against the floor. Candles were still flickering through the house, making it easy to wander along the length corridors. He’d been here before so he knew where Lady Geneva spent her evenings and, as he approached the large oak door, Jamie’s wame flip-flopped.
He felt physically sick, his gut gurgling uncomfortably as he pressed his hand against the cold handle. Taking one deep breath, he pushed it open, the creek seeming extraordinarily loud in such a quiet corridor. Still nobody seemed to stir, or to come investigating, so he pressed onwards, eager to get this over with as quickly as possible. He could not put his family in danger…again. He wouldn’t.
Jamie was surprised as he entered the room. The place seemed devoid of life. He’d expected to find Geneva on the bed waiting for him, but the sheets lay undisturbed.
“Milady?” He called, the sound of the dull thud of his heart beating in his ears, making his words almost impossible to hear. If she wasn’t here, what would he do?
“Jamie,” a familiar English voice whispered, her shaky tone causing his heart to stop dead in his chest, “you came…”
No.
It couldn’t be.
Jamie held his breath. Reaching a wobbly hand out, he moved towards the voice, his feet barely carrying him forwards.
She stood in the shadows, her back to him, her shift almost see through in the candlelight.
“Aye,” he returned, finally, his voice working…just.
He still couldn’t quite grasp what he was seeing. In fact he was certain he was dreaming and any minute he would awaken to Geneva and her cold, blue eyes.
From the side he could see the corners of blue eyes that didn’t hold such contempt. Large aqua irises that held the glint of love he’d often thought about. He had prayed her safe, wished often that he could beckon her back somehow and even searched that desolate moor for her in the hopes that she was the white witch Kerr had been rambling about.
Yet here she was, restored right before his eyes.
The shock brought him to his knees and his vision blurred as he tried to stay conscious. He managed, just, long enough to see her turn swiftly and take him in her arms.
“Claire,” he stuttered, burying his head against her neck as she grasped him to her breast.
“Yes, Jamie. It’s me. I’m here,” she soothed, rubbing his back gently as she kissed along the top of his forehead carefully. “I wanted to come to you so badly, but with Brianna…” Stopping suddenly, Jamie realised that Claire could only be talking about one thing. Their child. The one he’d forced her to leave to save..
His daughter.
“S-she…lives?” He replied, his breath fanning over Claire’s collarbone as he pulled his head up to look directly into her eyes, his vision clear now.
“Yes, she does,” Claire said, her voice alight with joy. “And she’s here, so I couldn’t just wander up to Helwater and claim you as mine. Not with your parole still firmly in place. I had to be more discrete. Geneva,” she continued, her fingers tracing patterns over the thin material of his shirt. It tickled, a pleasant sensation that had him curling closer to Claire in his half-conscious state. “She offered to help me, us.”
“Jesus, Mary and Bride,” Jamie cursed, realising that her ploy to get him to her rooms hadn’t involved a drunken Hal divulging his secrets at all.
“Is she here,” he perked up, “Brianna?”
The way he said her name set Claire’s heart fluttering. The slight rolling of the ‘r’ and the elongation of the ‘e’ made it sound immediately more Scottish.
“Geneva has her entertained, but she said she would bring her up soon. Just to give us some time alone, you and I.”
“Dhia! I can meet her? What is she like? Does she bare any of yer features, Claire? Or mine?”
Claire laughed, a wonderful girlish giggle that warmed Jamie inside out.
“She looks like you, Jamie. A lot like you.”
Smiling, he bent forward and kissed her neck, his warm lips hovering over her pale skin as he breathed in every inch of her. His wife. His rock. She’d come for him, as Kerr had said. She had found him….finally.
The subtle creek of the door made Jamie twitch against Claire, his eyes catching the distinct flash of red as a small figure darted through the crack, heading straight for them.
“Mama,” the girl whispered, making Jamie squint in the dimly lit room. He couldn’t see her properly as to be able to distinguish her features, but the blue of her eyes shone in the candlelight and it felt as if the breath had been stolen from his lungs. Sitting up, he moved away from Claire to let the lass up.
Brianna, seeing the braw Scot huddled close to her mother, dipped her chin in shyness. Her cheeks heated, but the night hid her embarrassment and coyness as she slunk closer to Claire, wrapping her smalls arms around her mother’s waist as she tried to semi-hide herself from view.
“It’s alright, darling,” Claire soothed, letting one arm drop from Jamie to reach behind her and hold her daughter close, “did Geneva send you up?”
Brianna nodded, her long curls brushing against the back of Claire’s neck as Claire shifted a little to the side, giving Jamie a clear view of the small lassie. “Y-yes, she said I should come now, that you wouldn’t mind.”
“Never,” Jamie breathed, his eyes wide and unblinking as he reached one shaky hand out towards his daughter. Glancing back to Claire, he licked his bottom lip, cocking his head to the side as a million questions exploded in his head. Seeing them together. His wife and his child, right before his eyes, brought to the fore certain lines enquiry that he simply couldn’t wait to have answered.
Brianna kept a firm eye on Jamie, her long red lashes shimmering with moisture as she tried to mimic Jamie’s movements, taking him in from head to toe as she watched him do the same.
“How, mo nighean?” He whispered, finally, choosing the simplest question first. “How did ye come to be here?”
“I found you!” Bree jumped in, her excitement palpable, blatantly she couldn’t contain herself. It was endearing and Jamie grinned, his teeth glinting in the darkness as he looked lovingly over at his wee daughter. It made his heart jump a little to know that she was still young enough that he might have some input in her upbringing...now.
“She did,” Claire replied, proudly. “Frank, he agreed to a divorce when we discovered that our re-joining wasn’t going to be...sustainable.” Claire dipped her head, her shame at not being able to fully commit to her first husband causing her stomach to twist. She *had* loved Frank, and she hadn’t wanted it to end as it had.
“They fought a lot,” Bree added, an underlying sorrow to her tone, “about me.”
“Yes,” Claire added sadly, “we did. Frank wanted custody, and he won…”
Jamie balked, his fingers twitching at the idea of Randall taking his daughter away from Claire but he fought to remain calm. They were here, with him not Frank, he reminded himself, his temper calming a little.
“It’s alright, mama,” Bree comforted, burying her head in Claire’s neck in camaraderie with her mother.
“It is, Bree, now it is.”
“What happened, Claire?” Jamie asked, his interest piquing as Claire and Bree glanced to one another, seemingly communicating without words.
“I went with daddy,” Bree answered, her chin quivering a little as her eyes glazed with the memory of it. It hurt Jamie to hear her call Frank ‘daddy’, but then again he had been that for her, as he had meant when he’d sent Claire back through the stones. “I wanted to...at first. I was happy.” Surreptitiously she gripped Claire’s waist, inferring that the same did not apply now. “But then I found some papers…” Flopping against her mother, fatigue coating her face, Bree took a deep breath and snuggled between Claire and Jamie. Clearly she’d shared as much as she was able under the current circumstances.
“Frank had found you, Jamie,” Claire continued, the combined warmth of Jamie and Bree together in one place lending her all the strength she needed to continue, “he had been talking to our friend, Reverend Wakefield, back in Inverness and he’d detailed your journey from Culloden back to Lallybroch and then on to Ardusmuir. The Reverend had written to update Frank, telling him that you were here, at Helwater and Brianna inadvertently found the letters documenting it.”
“Dhia,” Jamie exclaimed, sliding closer still to his small family. “It mentioned that I was yer father then, Brianna?” Jamie asked, certain that it must have given that it had upset her so.
“Yes,” Bree whispered, her wee hand finding Jamie’s as she kept her eyes closed. She was on the cusp of sleep but was fighting hard to stay awake long enough to hear Claire finish the story. “He knew you’d survived, almost the whole time that I’d been alive. He lied to me, and to mama.”
Claire swallowed, her head dipping to kiss to the top of Bree’s head. “We’d agreed, Bree, remember? That we’d raise you. I know he lied, but he was trying to protect us too--”
“He still kept it from us, mama,” Bree interrupted, the anger clear in her voice. Jamie recognised the stubborn set of her words. She was clearly a Fraser. He smiled despite himself and rubbed Bree’s warm fingers.
“So ye sought me out and came back?” Jamie pushed on, trying to calm the distemper that had arisen in his clearly sleepy daughter.
“I was a mess after the court hearing. I worked but that was all. When I came home after a long shift to find Bree curled up on the sofa with the papers clutched tightly between her fingers and tears staining her cheeks I knew that she needed closure. I knew that she needed to come here and see you to learn about who she was as well as learning who you are.”
“Christ I’m glad, sassenach,” Jamie muttered, gathering Brianna in his arms and motioning Claire towards the rather large, neatly made bed. Along the way he blew out the few remaining candles, bringing the room fully black to allow some manner of rest. It had been a long evening and dawn would be upon them before he knew it. He wanted nothing more than to sleep now, his women safely cocooned beneath the luxurious sheets.
Following exhaustedly, Claire kept her hand secured in the back of Jamie’s shirt, her other wrapped around Bree’s free hand as they all slunk over to the grand four poster bed. Jamie slid in first, Brianna swaddled gingerly against his chest. Claire let go of them briefly, just until Jamie was bundled cosily beneath the sheets. Scooching in beside them, she allowed Jamie to slip around her waist, bringing her arms around Bree as she settled her chest against Brianna’s back.
“For all I hate the man for what he put ye through, Claire,” Jamie sighed, his eyes catching Claire’s as they gazed sleepily across as one another over Bree’s bright red hair as she slept soundly between them, “I canna help but be grateful that he was as careless as to leave those notes out for Brianna to find. Wi’out that I would still be here wish ye back to life.”
“I love you, Jamie Fraser,” Claire whispered, the cloaked darkness easing little by little as her eyes grew accustomed to it. “Since I found out you’d lived through Culloden I haven’t stopped thanking God for bringing you back to me. I j-just couldn’t live without you and Brianna in my life.”
“I ken, Claire,” Jamie returned, “all too well. I wanted to die that day and a lot of the days that followed. But ye understand it, aye? Why I was meant to live. Why you were meant to find me...again?”
“God yes,” Claire sighed rapidly, her words almost blurring together as her fingers clenched tightly at the bunched fabric of Jamie’s breeks where they rested on his hips. “I always will, Jamie…”
“...until our lives shall be done,” Jamie finished, their eyes closing simultaneously as they drifted calmly to sleep, their chests rising and falling, the three of them all in time with one another as slumber claimed them.
Outside the wind blew, gusting over the desolate land before dissipating leaving a serene harmony floating around Helwater and the dozing Frasers as they lay in each other's arms, safely locked away from the world beyond.
