#hemp thoughts

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Rowan is being a dingleberry. He’s following me around while shaking his jingly toy.

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Captain Hook: that song in Dr. Seuss movie about Bart and Plumber Pants about wearing garters and feather boas

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Note from awbe later: I apologize in advance for this.

This mini exposition dump is my challenge to try to explain sometbint I’m still learning about while high in the sky. I’m a little less so rn so I’m going to quickly explain. Then afterwards I will compare what I think then to what I thought in the hazepost. For science. Jk, it’s for fun. Jk jk it’s for fun science.

I was going to send this to my poor friend but couldn’t bear it. So I dropped it here instead for later analhzks analysis. Because she does not like math.

⚠️Wasnknf! Warning! Contains (probably very flawed) math🔥⚠️

No. I won’t go stoNERD on you too hard, but the 2018 farm bill states that industrial hemp/marijuana plant is legal nationwide but the %THC (psychoactive 🅿️🐉🌿↪️🍄👁️‍🗨️🅰️☮️🌱ℹ️♈️🐚ingredient) (I spent about 20 min crafting that illustrative spelling and completely forgot what I was talking about. -! Yes, THC. To be legal everywhere, it has to contain <0.3% THC per dry weight. But recreational marijuana contains 50-80% THC. Which makes it sound like the two Soylent even compare to each other, it’s like regular juice and capri sun with tha. Folacer is moving far away.

I just noticed that it dries out my always phlegmy airway and it feels so freeing. It’s like breathing the entire atmosphere around you. Floating like a fish and it all every completely opn. And kicking with foot fins. I’m imaginning a fish getting a set of human feet like how we have mermaid tails and the fish is kicking little feet attached to its tail. But anyway I’m cry laughing here and it isn’t making me cough on phlegm. My airway is like a cover tunnel on a busy ancient street. Active and transferring energy.

I have probably already outworn my stoNERDy welcome but I have to say this for that to make sense. There are different types of THC molecules in the plant, and some have stronger effects than kthersZ. Of the <.3% THC can be Delta 8 or 9 or some other numbers. That’s how many chains of many connect to your cells. Sometimes there’s a letter like 9o and it means that there’s a chaink link 9

I didn’t say want anything wrong on somebody. Is this I’m the paranoia? Because I’m afraid I’ll say something offensive without meaning to. I thought it meant I would think somoene was following me.

I was concluding that and being like oh I should get back to reading and responding to C and I was like yesX that’s what I’m doing. 🤭

TL/DR: hemp is the same plant as marijuana but hemp products only have a much smaller amount of THC that can make you high. Like beer is 5% alcohol and gets you a little drunk, but Bacardi 151 is like 75% alcholo and wil get you SUPER drunk. Or you could just drink enough beers to add up to the same amount. Sorry, there’s math.

⚠️〽️🔺➕♊️⚠️

I have a glass of half orange juice, half Bacardi 151. The orange juice has 0% alcohol. The Bacardi has 75% alcohol. Average it is 37.5% alcohol mixed together.

Bobby Blabby has a beer purée in a glass because it’s a craft ber and he’s a hipster. (As I write tbese I like to imagine a history teacher in the year 3000 in the city of Technopolis asking students about what they think I meant in this post like this is the only literature remaining after the Great Disaster and they are trying to use it to unlock the secrets of their ancestors and what caused humanity to come dwindled to a handful!!! And they must use the knowelsge gained to prevent the same fate from complete self destruction. And they have to figure out what I meant. What I meant is what I said but what I said isn’t what I meant.

Bobby Blanby still has a beer. The beer is 5% alcohol. His glass is the same size as My glass. It’s a 12 oz glass. So his glass has 5% alcohol which is 14 grams. But my 12 oz glass is full of 40% Bacardi 151/juice alcohol (should be about 5x the grams. How many shots does a 12 oz glass contain. One “▶️®️❗️🦷🫰🏽” is 12 oz beer or 1.5 oz shot. How many snots in a beer. Yugk. About 8. But that’s how many shots to one beer. How many beers to one sjotZ. 40% x 12 oz = 4.8 oz = 14grams. ISH, I’m doing my best here. I mean. I just forgot what I meant by ISH. Oh, righted thrat the numbers aren’t exact and I’m just rounding them for the purpose of my story. But I love putting lots of ========= in a math sentence. 5% x 12 oz = 0.6 oz. So Bobby Blabby would have to drink 8 beers to get the same buzz

Now I want gra(HA!)m crackers. And some Beercardi 0.3%

So I would have to consume enough hemp to = 0.3 to 80%. So >80 puffs hemp = 1 puff mj? Why wouldn’t you want the higher % available so that the person doesn’t need to take kn as much of it. But maybe that doesn’t matter.

When my brain is back down, I am confident that I would be able to talk about these subjects better. But now much better, I have 0 confidence.

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Yesterday my friend and I went out for lunch. I had a big salad but while I was eating I had one of those sneezes that seems to start not from your lungs but from your very soul. There is no stopping it or getting out of its way. I sneezed into my elbow but then I noticed snippets of lettuce on my arm. I think they came out of my nose.

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“There was a little stream that fell into a river and the river flowed and flowed into a giant lake!”

•Rag doll gnome sits sits on a river bank and contemplates the complexities of the universe.

•. • Gandalf the Grizzly sits on a space log.

•Rad movie poster about a space bear surfer beaming down through a sky hole.

•Break dancing space Sloth being hunted by cloud shark

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Middle school English class, c. 1998. I feel very happy looking at a year in the 1900s. Another one. Anyway, we were instructed to play telephone for who knows what reason.

It went thus:

Teacher 👩🏻‍🏫 whispers to kid 1 👧🏾, who whispers to kid 2 👦🏽, etc.c etc. I thought I heard kid 4 👧🏼 whisper to kid 5 👧🏻

👧🏼 I got an E on my test.

👧🏻 (to me kid 6 🧒🏼) I need to listen my best. (?)

🧒🏼 (to final kid 👦🏾) I ngud a zhee on my zest. (Trying to blend the two things I thought I heard together.)

👦🏾 (waves arms in confusion) …….. I NEED TO JUMP OFF A CLIFF!!!!!

I messed up the numbering becsusr the class had 9 kids in it. It was a small school. But I leave the messed up numbers because that’s how I wrote it. That was a good memory from that time and place, and I relatively few.

He fell off a bottomless cliff into a bottomless pit. The cliff is bottomless too if the land mass extended down forever.

I’m inventing a game, à la Patrick: Rbe Game!

It’s telephone pictionary you can play uh yourselfZ you write a sentence into the Awi and pick the weirdest image you get. Write a sentence about that and put that into the aaai and keep going. I’m going to do thatZ in wonky to do that right niw

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Trying a new brand. it’s like my body is made of ice sliding smoothly down an ice hallway. The other ones make me feel like

What do you see? I see a lizard angrily glaring at the blue alien sitting on its tail while taking a picture of the alien.

I can’t remember one word I’m reading long enough to read the next one and put them together.

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What my gender is. I guess I always knew I wasn’t one or the other because I remember being a kid and seeing a bunch of gift bags at some event and they had blue and pink and I was always like:

“You know, I don’t really want either of those.”

I wanted an orange gift bag full of creepy Halloween stuff and orange candy. Any time throughout my life there are male options and female options and I’m just like (shrugs) and choose the one that has something I can use.

I thought everyone was just being complacent and choosing the one that they’re expected to “go with,” and that’s just what you’re supposed to do. But why then do I sometimes want the other gift bag or one that’s completely different. We just take what we don’t want because we’re supposed to?

Well, I have spent my life trying to be normal. It’s not that I actively “knew I was different”; I couldn’t even comprehend why I wasn’t doing the things like other people. So I kept trying to imitate what they do all the way to some semblance of adulthood. [Another good band name. I need to make a list of thos.]

BecUse I am visibly AFAB, I am always read as “female”. I’m stuck with it so to have the optimal reaction from people I try to lean into it because it’s what people are expecting. If someone is unsure of someone’s gender, people seem to view the person as more attractive if the person is confirmed male rather than female.

“I’ve got girl bits. So I’m just an ugly girl.”

Sure, I didn’t like the implication that I was ugly, but it didn’t even feel applicable to me. Like I’m being called ugly but that’s not the point. Like dustbins. Does anyone get worked up about dustbins being grotesquely hideous? No. They are usually appearance neutral and only noticeable for the height function.

So I found it advantageous to try the girl thing and it’s fine. Not torturously horrible but still an effort to fit within expected behaviors. But I don’t do a lot of the boy things either. Not into sports or cars. But I sure like early biplanes and triplanes. And insects, especially praying mantis. I didn’t go to movies because I generally didn’t like movies.

I am proudly disclosing that too. But everyone likes movies! There are plenty of movies I like, mostly animated ones. But it’s rare that I’ll sit and watch a movie with a story. I like a background music movie, but following a story is hard work, and I’m also admitting that I’m quite lazy. I can’t tell the characters apart, what are they talking about, I can’t hear them having an important conversation because I turned up the volume to hear the last important conversation and then a sudden explosion blew out my speakers. And my eardrums.

But now I know that I am non-binary.

When I think of my gender, those are the colors I think of.

My friend who is childfree told me (also childfree) that she hates that she gets bombarded with baby commercials online. I’m not sure what algorithm causes that but I never have that problem. I always get dommercisn about food, video games, retirement plans, travel, just whatevs. And that’s how I like it best.

I like clothes to be lightweight and stretchy, so lady clothes work well. And men shampoo and deodorant. I like having groovy long hair. I think about how much I like sometbint first and whatever it is adds to my gender. My gender is all

I was never part of the binary. I’m out there floating in space where I belong. Not literally of course. The first time I heard the term “non-binary,” I thought of binary stars. I am not a binary star. I am a nebula. What is it? Yes. Nebula is very star.

I am the orange bag filled with pop rocks and flamin skull head/snake/rose combo tattoos. Or those glow in the dark dracula teeth that never fit me. Because it belongs in someone else’s green or orange or purple or multi bag.

I have to be careful when I walk. My legs feel like a tall stack of discs wobbling and threatening to topple over. I think that’s how I hurt my back. My muscles are so relaxed that they’ll do things that aren’t a good idea.

And then later they hurt.

I keep forgetting what day it is. And what time. Good thing I don’t need to be anywhere doe a while.

But I still don’t talk about it much. Who cares about it, bhr also I don’t want to seem like I’m doing it on purpose. Like, “Why are you so special you need different pronouns and words.” Because words are labels and I’m labeling what is.

I accept any pronouns actually. Other kids called me “it/its” when I was a kid because they did not like me and wanted to other me. I’ll accept anything that sees even part of my humanity, even if that part is only the part that society sees as female. I don’t even like writing that word in pink very much because I don’t feel right with the word female and I really don’t feel right being associated with pink. And I don’t think I would have felt much more right when pink was the color for boys. And it’s not just because I don’t like pink. Some shades of pink are awesome.

It’s just such a genderly loaded color.

I’m a gender nebula.