Nov 16, 2025
Lost love
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Lost love
@existencebringsonlypain has never conceptulized eating fries with ranch??????? like what???????????
have you ever eaten ranch with fries???
Yes, and I enjoy it
Yes, but I didn't like it
I've heard of it but never tried it
People do that??
I dont like ranch/i dont like fries
"is this a regional thing?" i,,,,,,,,dont,,,,,,,,,,,,think so,,,,??????
Anybody remember when Velveeta ran all those ads telling people what queso dip was because somehow its existence was unknown to a demographically-significant portion of the populace?
Now we have to "Normalize ranch with chicken and meat?"
"Normalize Ranch?"
Ranch with meat isn't just normal. It's Hypernormal. It's been a standard condiment since the Clinton Administration. It's mayo for people who hate mayo.
RANCH FACTS:
They give you cups of it at wing places, you don't ask for it. You have to tell them to give you something else.
They do the same at pizza places, and also sometimes ranch replaces the red sauce.
Ranch is so American it invades food groups like its looking for oil.
I'm in Oklahoma. We still had dry counties up until the twenty-teens and even we've been dipping our pizza in ranch since videogames came in a plastic cartridge.
It's so basic we've gotten desensitized and we're mainlining Green Goddess and Blue Cheese just feel something.
If you have too much shame to put ranch on something, like meatloaf, that doesn't stop us. We just put the powder directly into the meatloaf.
The average Midwesterner is 17% ranch dressing by volume.
Ranch hasn't become a beverage yet, but it's still trying.
I met a moth asking for a guide with spirits, so I befriended them and led them through all the spirits of Forest Brook, then took them to Grandma's with me. It was so delightful to watch their behavior throughout.
They kept trying out the different emotes they had, and would run between light blooms testing them out. They even ran away from me for a little bit to see what would happen when the rain drained their light XD (I relit them after they tested it)
Then as soon as we got to Grandma's, this is what they did:
So I joined them 😄
Then they discovered swimming
and I made the mistake of showing them the underwater tunnel
(they spent so much time in there that I was worried they would run out of oxygen)
Yes...a Black person invented ranch dressing.
Mojave Yucca, Hidden Valley
By Optimal Focus Photography
Im sick of hiding it.
Ranch dressing is a vile liquid. It is the most putrid of condiments and does not deserve to be in production. I fully support letting people do what they want as lo bc as they aren’t hurting anyone else / everyone is consenting - but once ranch dressing is involved there is not a pantheon of worship that contains a god who’s love can redeem the act affiliated with such a reprehensible sauce
