#honeycombwerewolfe

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Apparently it’s been 3 years since we all found out that Bernie was still alive

Serena feels like celebrating this 🥳🥳🥳

@honeycombwerewolfe

[reluctantwonderchild]

The meaning of love

As she looked over and watched the pair dance, Charlie couldn’t help but be struck dumb at what she saw. The pair, clearly oblivious to everyone else around them, were so besotted with one another. So obviously in love, that it emanated from them and filled the room with warmth and happiness.

It dawned on Charlie that this was perhaps the first time she’d seen love like this. Or at least, seen either of her parents so happy and content. So at ease. As if they were adjoining pieces of the same jigsaw. They simply fit together, like it was always meant to be. It filled her with both joy and sadness that Bernie had, seemingly, only found this in the last few years. But she had found Serena and for that Charlie would forever be grateful.

Watching Bernie and Serena, Charlie was brought back to her own speech made not that long ago. Only just now realising how true her words had been.

“I used to think I knew what love was. True love. Fairy tales, movie endings. Driving off into the sunset for a ‘happily ever after’. Naïve thoughts I think we all have growing up. But it’s from watching mum and Serena that I can now see what love really is. No relationship is perfect. But if I can ever find someone I can have a relationship with that is anything like theirs then I think that’ll be a pretty good life. Partners who are equal. Treat each other with respect. Acceptance. Support each other. A relationship filled with kindness, humour, passion, and contentment. You know every so often when you see a couple and you can’t imagine them not being together? Or that it just feels right that they were meant to be together? That’s what I feel when I see Serena and mum. After everything that’s happened over the last few years. Everything we’ve been through as a family. I’m so proud to be able to stand here and celebrate their love and relationship with you all. And I’m proud to be the daughter, and now, stepdaughter, of two such amazing women. I know I’m not the only one.”

It was with a pang of grief, one that she quickly tried to push away, that she thought of Cam and Elinor as her speech drew to a close and she picked up her glass to raise a toast.

Afterwards, when she had a moment with Bernie and Serena, she’d pull her mum into a hug and whisper: “I meant it, you know. I am proud, and I love you so much. I know Cam would say so too.” Her arms, tightly wrapped around Bernie, hoping her mum would feel the magnitude of her love even as her bottom lip wobbled at the thought of her brother.

@honeycombwerewolfe

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Hey... so er... could you maybe... get your wife a hair brush for christmas this year? I feel like it's something no ones ever gotten her and the the woman's in serious need. If theres room in the budget... detangling spray wouldn't go a miss either. Your hair however... fabulous dahling.

"I do assure you, Bernie owns and uses a hairbrush. Perhaps you should use the apparent ample time you have on your hands to worry about your own situation." Serena eyes up the nonnie's hair with practised distain.

Although she does make a mental note to buy some detangle spray for Bernie the next time she pops into Superdrug.

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Nightmare ask- Ellys car rushed at you and for a moment you genuinely thought she was going to run you over but instead you felt yourself shoved out of the way. As your body hit the ground you heard the deafening screech of the cars breaks and the crack of a windscreen. A sense of deja vu hit you. Jason. Scrambling to get to your feet you ran to the front of the car only to find not Jason, but Bernie, laying face down on the tarmac, a halo of red surrounding her golden head.

There had been many iterations of this dream. Several revolved around Serena stopping Elly before she got to the car. Stopping Jason from getting hurt. Perhaps even stopping her daughter's death. In others it was Serena that got hit, and even a few where Elly ended up dying an even more horrific death than reality had bestowed.

They all hurt. All left Serena waking up with a start and a cry, sweat pouring and heart scrambling to tell fiction from reality. But, no matter what, she was always left with the heavy, sinking feeling of the grief that would never leave her. That her daughter was dead.

This version was a particular nasty one. For, if there was a loss that would ever come close to that of her daughter, it was Bernie. Seeing the scene play out once more, it was with a sickening scream that Serena woke up - a cry of "Bernie!" leaving her lips. Even as sleep left her, Serena couldn't get the image of Bernie lying dead and prone on the cold tarmac. Sobbing into her hands, there would be no more sleep tonight. Not until wine had been drunk, enough to blur out the memory of that dream and the blood stained blonde hair.

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Bittersweet Birthday

Usually, this time of year signalled the start of happier times. The days would start to get longer. Personally painful anniversaries for Serena had passed for another year. But, most importantly, it held Bernie’s birthday. In happier times for them both, Serena had revelled in making plans and buying gifts. But this year, going all out didn’t seem quite right. Surprises were certainly out of the question. Still, Serena had a few ideas up her sleeve. 

It started with a steaming cup of coffee at Bernie’s bedside and a small pile of cards that had arrived over the past few days. Serena, having popped back into bed once the coffee had brewed, snuggled up to Bernie - gently carding her fingers through Bernie’s hair. 

@honeycombwerewolfe

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

How did Bernie propose the first time? How did you feel?

"Well, she didn't propose. Not in the sense of actually saying - Serena, will you marry me?" Serena chuckled as she admitted how it had played out. "We were discussing the future. Buying a house together. How we both wanted to continue our careers. Then Bernie mentioned sharing her pension. Of course, I then pointed out that we'd have to be married for that." Another chuckle as a broad smile and look of pure happiness spread across her features. "After a few moments of nervous bumbling, I finally managed to get Bernie to admit that she was asking me to marry her. I said yes. That was that. As for how I felt, well, I don't think I've ever been happier."

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Five Years

The following thread contains themes of grief and child loss. I’m not tagging as I don’t really understand what works and what doesn’t for tumblr now so please read this warning before proceeding with reading the thread.

It was funny, Serena thought, that something could feel like it happened so long ago and yet also feel like it had happened yesterday. She’d been dreading this day. Dreading having to face the worst of anniversaries yet again, and this time with the added grief of what Bernie was currently going through. Her partner’s pain was so new, so raw, it felt wrong to bring attention to her own. So, Serena quietly counted down the days, sleep coming less and less easily, if it ever came easily these days. If she could just get past this day, she might be able to breathe again, to focus on Bernie and not the weight of all that this day meant. For, tomorrow would be just another day, and not the day her daughter had died.

At least, that was what she told herself as she finally gave up on sleep at about 3am. In an attempt to not disturb Bernie, Serena had tried to keep the tossing and turning to a minimum. Turned away from Bernie, she’d taken to staring off into the dark, lost in her own thoughts and grief. Once she could no longer bear to lie in bed, and once she was sure Bernie was asleep, Serena quietly got dressed and slipped out of their rented home - leaving a note for Bernie on her nightstand. A note that read - gone to see Ellie.

@honeycombwerewolfe

[bisexualsurgeonextraordinaire]

Serena would like it known that she does not want a tap inserted into any orifice. For any reason. Ever.