#hongou

[bazahabinga]

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine annoying the shit outta the red hair pirates

I can't believe I'm doing a stupider one piece version of the Who's on first bit

Shanks: okay, are you listening?

You: *looks him dead in the eye, hearing him just fine*, huh?

Shanks: *lets out a tired sigh* very well there are five marine outposts on this island, they're in the shape of the world government's symbol. I'm talking the center building, which is the unit's headquarters, where most of the ranked marines reside. Benn will take the southern outpost. Lucky Roux will take the western outpost and then Yassop will take the eastern one, and you will take the northern base with most of the crew.

You: Okay

Yassop: *not convinced you were listening* who's taking the eastern outpost?

You: Roux's taking the western outpost.

Yassop: WHO not Roux!

You: here? *Points at the map*

Shanks: Yes, up here

You: But you said Yassop over here at the Eastern outpost?

Shanks: *presses his forehead against the table and gently bangs his head on it.* Yes, I did. Fine, then what about here then? *points at the northern outpost.

You: Benn's at the southern outpost.

Shanks: *groans* can you even hear me?

You: *laughs* yes, you take the central base, Roux takes the western out post, Yassop takes the eastern, Benn attacks the southern one, and I attack the northern with the crew.

Yassop: You actually were listening

You: I do that quite a lot, you people are always surprised.

Shanks: because you act and look like you're not listening.

You: I know, I do it mostly for my own amusement.

Yassop: *puts you in headlock and gives you a noogie* You're lucky you're cute.

At port

Benn: *finalizing the list of supplies needed, and who is getting them*

You: *singing an onomatopoeia of the instrumentals of topic by the champs* wa wewaaaAaAaAa wah wa wewaaaAaAaAa wah *hip checks Benn into the water* tequila wa wewaaaAaAaAa wah *dances in place*

Benn: God damn it (y/n)! *Climbs back on the dock* You're gonna be paired with me and the boss.

You: Noo!

Benn: Yes! And in the meantime you get to assist me our supplies. *hooks his hands under your armpits and picks you up and deposits you on a chair next to him.*

You: *whines*

Benn: do you know why I do this, managing the cargo? So we don't starve.

You: And because your needs were never met when you were a child, and so now you go out of your way to take care of the needs of others while actively neglecting yourself?

Benn: ... Okay look, besides all of that, it needs to get done.

You: What ever lets you sleep at night, sweetheart.

Benn: I loathe you sometimes.

You: *winks and smooches at him*

The Crew: *just finished doing maintenance after a storm damaged the ship and are packing up their supplies*

You: *Hiding in a cabinet and makes the water drop noise with your mouth*

The Crew: *freezes*

Shanks: *dangerously close to yelling*

Yassop: God damn it, I don't have the energy to look around for some stray leak tonight.

Hongo: suck it up, we gotta find it before it leads to flooding.

You: *makes the noise twice again*

Lucky Roux: Especially considering the pantry is below this.

You: *makes the noise again, and tries not to laugh*

Benn: It sounds like it's coming from in here *opens the cabinet you're hiding in* .... (y/n) why are you up here? Y'know what, I don't wanna know, do you see the leak?

You: No *makes the noise while looking him dead in the eyes*

Benn: You little! *grabs you by your ankle, pulls you out, and lifts you by off the ground.*

You: *can't stop laughing*

Benn: I found the leak.

Shanks: what? No.

Benn: *shakes you* make the noise brat, or I'll spank you.

You: Promise?

Benn: Do it again.

You: *tries several times, but fails because you can't stop smiling and has to compose yourself before you can make the noise again.*

Yassop, and Lucky Roux: Can we throw them in the brig for the night.

Shanks: You may not, but we can make them do an idiot check to see if we missed any leaks while the rest of us go to bed.

You: That's fair.

List of Up-and-coming works

Support me on Kofi and Patreon

[barefeetwiki]

Yume Nikaidou (Yume Nikaido, Ai Hongou, Ai Hongo)

[marshmallow--shark]

I love this game so much, I made memes that at least one (1) person will understand

Also alternate Shimagou version of the old man one & Mitsuzuma + Shimada of the toxic couple one

[kazutakas-pinch]

Phone Wallpapers

Okay so i couldn't find a phone wallpaper generator so all of these are literally screenshots of my own phone lockscreen that i set with these pics that i think the koi kids would use A;SLDKFAJSD Shoutout to @pierrotpriest for sending me down this rabbithole (there are black blanks by some of the wallpapers just so the post isn't so damn long to scroll down with)

Yuiji

I feel like Yuiji's phone gallery is extremely sparse with photos that he actually takes himself + a bunch of photos where hongou and mayu stole his phone and just spammed photos. However, one of the few things that I think he would care about taking pics of is the bb Azuki. This shibe is yuzutheinu on IG.

Yamato

I think Yamato would set an ostensibly generic looking nature photo as his wallpaper. He'd take it at some moment though where he felt calm and save it as his background to hold on some of that calmness. This photo is by Mak on Unsplash

Hongou

Hongou's would OFC be his fav idol LOL Then, once he started officially dating his girlfriend, he'd change it to the whole group in general. This is Shizuku for ME:I who I literally found by trying to research a jpop idol who looked like hongou's gf a;lsdkfja;

Nacchan

Nacchan strikes me as someone who would be into cozy video games like Stardew Valley and Animal Crossing, so I chose a fanart by @chanteii as her wallpaper!

Seki

At first, I considered giving Seki an inspirational photo he took while he was traveling, but then I thought it'd be super funny (and still in character) if he was the kind of person that never customized his phone settings and just uses the default wallpaper ASL;DKFJA

Mayu

I think Mayu's wallpaper while she was dating Yuiji would be a really subtle photo of her friends, and I chose this one by Nico Tsviliov on Unsplash that I thought would be super sweet memory of Mayu posing Yuiji and Hongou's hands in this photo. Then, after they break up, she'd pick just a random pretty nighttime picture she's taken before. The second photo is by Tsuyoshi Kozu on Unsplash.

Sakura

I feel like Sakura would be an indie movie hoe, so his wallpaper is a screencap from Wong Kar Wai's In the Mood for Love.

Akiyama

My immediate inclination was to give Akiyama a fanart of his favorite female video game character A;LDKJFA After some brief research, I decided Baiken from Guilty Gear would be his type. This fanart is by Sokuse Kienta who used to be on pixiv and twitter, but I can't find where they are now.

[pancakey-haley]

Finally managed to get SOMETHING out 😩🙈

[wiverly]

100% canonical that Shanks still believes children are found in the treasure chests, a bit like the story of cabbages and storks. For some reason this is all Roger's fault, as always...

And I'm also certain that there was a conversation with Luffy that went something like this:

Luffy: Shanks, Grandpa told me babies are brought by storks, but I know that's not true.

Shanks: Yes, you are right. Sit down, the time has come for you to know the truth.

Red Haired Pirates & Makino: NO!

Shanks: Children are found in the treasure chests.

Luffy: Really? So cool!

Red Haired Pirates & Makino: *sigh of relief*

After Luffy is gone.

Yasopp: For a moment I almost thought you wanted to tell him the truth.

Shanks: What are you talking about?

Punch: Of the children's story, Boss.

Roux: Yeah, I don't really know how you came up with the treasure chest story so quickly.

Gab: The Captain is fantastic, always full of imagination!

Shanks: Guys... wait... you don't know that children are found in the treasure chests?

Snake: Wait... you mean...

Limejuice: You really believe it?

Hongou: Are you kidding, aren't you?

Shanks: Guys, this is how I was found.

Red Haired Pirates & Makino: *shocked silence*

Beckman: Oh God...

[haydeink]

HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!

May you party and rest like a pirate before the new adventures that wait ahead :D