asking haikyuu boys if you can get them pregnant…?
I made this at like 3 am…I just wanted a little bit of silliness
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asking haikyuu boys if you can get them pregnant…?
I made this at like 3 am…I just wanted a little bit of silliness
Tsukki's Girlfriend—☆
Summary: Karasuno’s going through 7 stages of grief after finding out their beloved blocker has a girlfriend, who is surprisingly SWEET!?.
Warnings: Tsukishima Kei x Oblivious!female!reader, reader is oblivious maybe a little too much, chaos and lots of fluff.
Characters: Tsukishima Kei(ft.Karasuno).
A/N: *cries in singleness*(ToT).
The entire Karasuno team had gathered in the gym for evening practice, the sound of sneakers squeaking against the floor and volleyballs thudding in rhythmic chaos. Nishinoya was screaming about rolling-thunder, Kageyama was yelling about sets, and Tsukishima was—
Standing there, glaring at them, as usual.
Except Hinata noticed something different.
“Hey, Tsukishima,” he said as the team broke for water. “You’ve been smiling at your phone a lot lately.”
“I don’t smile.”
“You literally just did!”
Daichi raised an eyebrow from across the room. “You? Smiling? Must be serious.”
The gym quieted. Even Nishinoya stopped bouncing his ball.
Tanaka leaned forward, grinning like a hyena. “Wait. Tsukishima Kei…is that a girlfriend smile?”
Tsukishima froze mid-sip of water. “No.”
“Liar!” Hinata yelled immediately, pointing accusingly. “You totally have a girlfriend!”
“Oi, shrimp, stop talking nonsense—”
“WHO IS SHE?” Nishinoya practically screamed, jumping onto Tanaka’s shoulders. “IS SHE TALL? IS SHE COOL? DOES SHE EXIST?!”
Yamaguchi bit his lip to stifle a laugh. “Um. Actually…she does.”
Tsukishima turned to him slowly. “Yamaguchi.”
“Y-yeah?”
“Don’t.”
Too late.
Kiyoko, of all people, blinked in mild surprise. “You’re dating someone, Tsukishima?”
Even Sugawara’s smile turned dangerously curious. “Well, this is news. She must be someone special if you’re actually putting effort into hiding her.”
Tsukishima rubbed his temples. “You people are exhausting.”
But the damage was done.
Within minutes, the entire gym was buzzing with wild theories about the mysterious girlfriend. Nishinoya was convinced she must be “a cool college girl who likes clubbing.” Hinata thought “a mean girl who is mean to everyone except him .” Tanaka was sure “a tall queen who can handle his sarcasm.”
Daichi finally sighed. “Okay, everyone calm down. Tsukishima doesn’t have to tell us anything.”
But Kageyama squinted. “Then why is Yamaguchi laughing?”
Yamaguchi flinched. “N-no reason!”
Practice ended late that evening, the sky soft orange. Tsukishima was walking out of the gym with his bag slung over his shoulder when his phone buzzed.
[Name]: “I’m outside! Got your favorite strawberry milk :)”
Yamaguchi saw the message flash over his shoulder, eyes widening. “O-oh. She’s here?”
Tsukishima’s ears tinted pink. “Yeah, she wanted to walk home together.”
“Wait—outside the gym??”
Before Tsukishima could respond, the doors burst open and the entire team spilled out like excited puppies.
Nishinoya screamed,“WHERE IS SHE?”
Tanaka screamed joining him,“OUR LITTLE TSUKKI HAS A GIRLFRIEND—OH MY GOD!”
“STINKYSHIMA’S GIRLFRIEND EXISTS!!” Hinata was so shocked that he almost tripped.
While Kageyama was too stunned to speak.
“Kill me,” Tsukishima muttered under his breath.
And then they saw you.
You were standing by the bike racks, a sweet, gentle smile lighting up your face, holding two cartons of strawberry milk in your hands. You waved cheerfully. “Kei! I got the kind you like! Oh, hello!”
You blinked as the Karasuno team collectively froze like they’d just spotted a unicorn—a very cute one.
Tsukishima took the milk from you quickly, muttering something that sounded suspiciously like “thanks, idiot,” but his ears were scarlet.
“...You’re her?” Sugawara whispered.
You tilted your head, confused. “Me?”
“Holy crap, she’s adorable,” Tanaka breathed.
“She called him Kei,” Hinata whispered, awestruck. “She calls him Kei!”
Daichi tried to keep order, but even he couldn’t help but smile. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Daichi Sawamura, captain of the team. I hope Tsukishima’s treating you well.”
You laughed softly, eyes warm. “It's nice to meet you Daichi-san, I am [Name] and don't worry Kei's very sweet, actually.”
Tsukishima choked on his drink. “Don’t—say things like that in front of them.”
You blinked. “Why? It’s true.”
The team lost it.
Nishinoya fell to his knees. “TSUKISHIMA IS SWEET?! WHAT DIMENSION IS THIS?!”
Hinata’s jaw dropped. “How?? How did you do it?? He yells at me for breathing wrong!!”
Tsukishima pinched the bridge of his nose. “Can we go now?”
But you, ever oblivious and sweet, just smiled at the team. “It’s nice to meet all of you! Kei talks about you a lot!”
Every head snapped toward Tsukishima in slow motion.
Tanaka gasped. “He TALKS about us?!”
Yamaguchi was grinning so hard his cheeks hurt. “Oh, he definitely does.”
You continued innocently, “He said Hinata’s really energetic but dumb, Kageyama’s super serious but also dumb and that Suga-san’s nice but a little scary when angry—”
Tsukishima groaned, turning his face away from the group.
“KEI!! You didn’t tell me they were all so funny!” you laughed, completely missing how he was slowly dying inside. “We should all hang out sometime!”
Hinata clasped your hands dramatically. “Please. Please save us from his sarcasm.”
Tsukishima grabbed your wrist gently, muttering, “We’re leaving.”
“But Kei—”
“Now.”
You pouted but agreed anyway.
After sharing goodbyes the team watched as you and Tsukishima walked away together, your hand swinging lightly in his.
Nishinoya exhaled deeply. “I can’t believe Tsukishima Kei has a girlfriend who smiles like that.”
Tanaka wiped away a fake tear. “Our salty little blocker’s grown up.”
Sugawara folded his arms, smirking. “He’s definitely whipped.”
“Whipped,” Kageyama agreed solemnly.
Hinata nodded. “Absolutely whipped.”
(While making that monk face XD).
Meanwhile, Tsukishima glanced at you beside him—your cheeks lit by the sunset, humming softly, oblivious to everything.
He sighed. “You…have no idea what you just did back there.”
You blinked. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No.” He looked away, ears pink again. “Just… you talk too much sometimes.”
“But they were so nice! I liked them!”
He exhaled slowly, the corner of his mouth twitching up despite himself. “You would.”
You smiled at him, tilting your head. “You’re blushing, Kei.”
“I’m not.”
“You are.”
He groaned. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re cute,” you said, completely serious.
He tripped over his own foot.
That night, Karasuno’s group chat exploded.
[Yamaguchi]: She’s the sweetest person I ever meet.
[Hinata]: How is he dating her???
[Nishinoya]: SHE CALLED HIM KEI (;-;).
[Tanaka]: The way she smiled at him... bro was about to melt.
[Daichi]: Don’t tease him too much.
[Sugawara]: Oh, I will.
And somewhere across town, Tsukishima was glaring at his phone while you were sitting beside him, happily sharing a pack of strawberry Pocky.
“Why do you look so angry?” you asked.
He sighed, leaning his body against yours quietly. “Because you met my team.”
“Didn’t you want that?”
“No.”
“Really? But they liked me!”
“I know.”
He paused. Then muttered, “Too much.”
You laughed softly, resting your head on his shoulder. “That’s okay. I like them too. But I like you most.”
He froze again, face bright red. “You really don’t know what you’re saying sometimes.”
You blinked up at him, confused. “Why?”
He didn’t answer—just clicked his tongue, turned his head, and hid the smallest smile.
A week later, at practice, the team was still teasing him.
“Hey, Tsukishima, your girlfriend texted you again?” Hinata said in a teasing way.
“Aww, tell her we said hi!” Sugawara appeared behind him.
“I will not.”
But when everyone turned away, Yamaguchi caught it—
That tiny, quiet smile he thought Tsukishima wasn’t capable of.
And yeah, maybe Karasuno had discovered something wild that week—
That behind all the sarcasm and deadpan attitude…
Tsukishima Kei really could be soft—for someone sweet enough, not to even realize how much he loved them.
Especially you.
I love 2D mens<3.LIKES AND REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED!
Don't steal,copy,edit or use my works in any form without my permission.
Barelyalive out!
2. spaghetti ★ sakusa kiyoomi x f!reader
yn is light mode, omi is dark mode | tw—swearing, smd joke, ooc characters, yn and kageyama plotting
prev ch | next ch
♫⋆- spaghetti by lesserafim | yn's trend (let's imagine the msby4 are behind her while she danced mid practice)
GO! ★ MASTERLIST
fun facts
— akaashi was indeed impressed yn was not fired — sakusa literally frowned while watching her dance, that got the views — hinata called yn miss intern for like two days straight — after sakusa told her, yn hated that she actually went to her michael jackson playlist to listen it — sakusa muttered pest, when yn was filming her silly dancing video
taglist is open | @galaneiaeris @k4ss11333 @raebaebears @wolffmaiden @ottocre @bertqut1 @allyium @tlissablr @risagichi @honeyfewr
ring pop! / bsf!ushijima wakatoshi x reader
genre(s): heavy on the crack and fluff, dumb and dumber, ushiwaka is dense but loveable! childhood bsf to lovers! yay! sunshine! rainbows! candy!
warning(s): nothing, implied fem reader for fluency's sake, but please interpret this as you'd like!! i myself am non-binary, so at the very least you know the person who's writing has you in mind!! i still tried my best to keep everything gender neutral to the best of my ability!!
wc: 1490
tldr; “boyfriend? but i thought we were already dating?”
Hi bbyyy! I love your works so much, i’ve never requested or talked 2 someone over the inbox or wtv, just wondering if you’d make a haikyuu one shot with Kenma? Anything fluffy and cute. Sorry for the yap sesh, love youuu💖💖
hiii tysm for requestingggg ily n hope you enjoy 💗 fluff!!
kitty co-parents
kozume kenma x gn!reader. fluff, crack
“oh. my. god,” you stated, your words causing the seemingly stoic guy from your class to jump out of his skin as he turned, eyes wide and face flushed after getting caught. you pointed an accusatory finger at him. “you!”
kenma scrambled to his feet, accidentally dropping the small bag of cat treats he’d been holding. “i, um.. me…?”
the kitten jumped up, resting its paws against the side of the blanket-covered cardboard box. you’d been coming to see it every day after school, bringing food and water since you weren’t allowed to bring it home.
recently, you noticed a strange amount of toys and other treats appearing in the box. you had some tutoring sessions and group work that had you leaving later than usual, but still made a point of visiting the kitten. you wondered who could possibly have found the box you’d do expertly hidden (you tucked it beneath the covered awning behind a shutdown bakery).
“okay, look,” you said, propping your hands on your hips as you nodded toward the treats on the floor with your chin. “this just won’t do. we need rules if we’re going to be co-parenting shiki.”
kenma blinked at you. “shi.. who are you?”
you clutched your chest in disbelief—pained disbelief. “y/n? i’ve been in your class since the third grade?”
from the stare kenma had on you, you knew he did not remember sitting behind you the past two years.
ticking your jaw, you settled with propping your hands angrily against your jutted hips. forget the co-partnering scheme. “whatever! what are you doing with my cat?!”
kenma looked genuinely confused as he turned his head between you and the kitten, who was still struggling to pull itself from the box. “your cat?”
“yes, my… shiki!” you called, and the cat’s eyes flicked in your direction, meowing in a way that alerted he was hungry. “see?” you declared, letting your bag drop from your shoulders so you could retrieve the food packets you left inside.
in your peripheral, you noticed kenma staring. then, quietly, “apple.”
immediately, the cat looked at him and gave the same meow you’d received just seconds before. you blinked down at him as kenma shot you a grin that looked oddly painful. “see?”
it was official. your cat was parent-cheating on you.
aghast, you ripped the thin plastic lid off of the food and carefully placed it in the box with shiki. you watched him eat, eyes filled with horror. “you… betrayed me…”
kenma was snickering beside you, still crouching in front of the box with his knees to his chest and arms wrapped securely around them. though you hated him, the quiet sparkle in his eyes as he watched shiki-apple eat made something flutter behind your ribs.
clearing your throat, you straightened your shoulders and stuck a hand out toward him. kenma eyed it suspiciously. “what.”
“i’m striking a deal. we co-parent shapple here since clearly neither of us are allowed to bring pets home.”
kenma’d raised a brow at “shapple” but didn’t interrupt until you finished. he paused for a moment, debating your words, before reaching out and allowing you to clasp his hand. you ignored how warm his skin was against your palm and shook once.
“then, we’ll need to make a schedule,” he began after a moments hesitation, slipping his hand from your grasp. “i have volleyball practice after school on tuesdays and thursdays.”
that matched up with your tutoring surprisingly well. “okay. i tutor mondays and wednesdays. here, give me your number, and we’ll work out a plan for fridays and the weekend. it’s crazy we never ran into each other until just now!”
kenma reluctantly handed over his phone, eyes never straying from the device as you typed your number in and saved your contact with a 🐈 emoji beside your name. he practically snatched it from you when you handed it back.
“okay… i like to play games on the weekends, but i can come friday,” he announced slowly, and you shrugged in agreement since you didn’t live too far away.
“works for me. this will be a temporary relationship until we find a home for shapple, though. it’s getting colder and i don’t want to leave him outside…” you bit the inside of your cheek when you finished.
kenma blinked at you before slowly, awkwardly, placing a hand on your shoulder. “um. we will.”
you rolled your eyes but didn’t brush his hand away, even though it barely touched you. standing, you watched kenma’s hand fall before offering yours to him once again. he didn’t hesitate as long this time to grab it and squeaked when you pulled him to his feet. “upsy-daisy!”
you watched kenma brush himself off before you said, “he’ll be fine until breakfast. see ya in class tomorrow, partner!”
kenma watched you go, cheeks flushed as he recounted the encounter, until you disappeared until tomorrow.
Ouch!
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀
Thinking about Pro!Wakatoshi who hears Tobio talking about shaving his legs for Japan's upcoming game in the Olympics.
He overheard Shoyo and Tobio squabble over the idea that it would make you more aerodynamic and so Waka decided to try it out for himself.
He uses a regular mens razor, fresh from the packet though so it's extra sharp.
Wakatoshi walks out of the bathroom into the main space of your hotel room, where your sprawled on the bed scrolling on your phone.
He walks out with a satisfied look on his face, perhaps even proud of himself. What he doesn't notice however, is that the second he turned off the shower his legs started bleeding.
Profusely.
You lift your head up to see your pro player boyfriend all his 6'3 glory, absolutely smothered in blood from the waist down.
"Toshi..."
You spend the next thirty minutes patching up his legs and pointing out spots that he couldn't reach or missed completely.
This man left the back of his thighs entirely unshaven btw.
And yes, it was noticeable. Very noticeable.
Ushijima Wakatoshi competes in the Olympics the next day with bandaids plastered all over his legs. The press goes insane trying to figure out what happened.
You sit, giggling in your front row seat by the court with a stupidly large grin on your face.
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀
a/n: This man is so silly I cannot
All works are owned by @ lintobln - please do not copy, edit or plagiarize ♡
Tadashi Yamaguchi bf headcanons plsssss 😫😫🙏
Tadashi Yamaguchi ✧ bf headcanons
⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
fluff, crack, nsfw, dating headcanons, him being down bad for you
A/N: Sorry about the wait ml
Pre-Dating ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
• Laughs a little too hard at your jokes. Immediately embarrassed. Thinks he is “doing too much”.
• Tries to be useful as a love language, holding things, grabbing snacks, offering help before you ask.
• Gets visibly flustered when you compliment him. Stutters, looks away, but carries it with him all day.
• Confession is awkward and heartfelt. Voice shaking, hands clenched, but painfully sincere. Fully expects rejection or you asking about Tsukishima. Is completely stunned if you say yes.
Dating - SFW ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
• Extremely affectionate once he’s comfortable. Clingy in the sweetest way, always wants to be touching you somehow.
• Big on reassurance. Needs it, gives it, thrives on it. You both get softer together.
• Loves quiet dates: walks, cafés, staying in and watching something low-stakes.
• Gets excited planning small surprises. Nothing flashy, your favorite snack, a note in your bag, a playlist he made quietly.
• Very considerate with boundaries. Always asks before assuming. Learns quickly and adjusts even faster.
• Always checking in. “Is this okay?” “Are you comfortable?” And he genuinely listens. He will never make you stay uncomfortable.
• Protective but not possessive. Stands a little taller when you’re with him, thinks you give him strength.
• Keeps sentimental things. Tickets, notes, random objects that remind him of you. I bet you they’re the most random things too.
• If you’re stressed, he forces himself to be calm on purpose. Grounds you by being steady, even though he is freaking out internally.
• Laughs at his own jokes more when you’re around.
• Falls asleep holding you. Stays asleep that way. Wakes up relieved you’re still there. You’re his safe place. He relaxes around you in a way he doesn’t around anyone else.
• Texts you updates about his day even when nothing happened.
• Extremely attentive. Notices mood shifts before you say anything and adjusts without making it a big deal.
• Likes walking on the side closer to traffic. Pretends it’s random. It’s not.
• Walks slightly slower when he’s with you so you don’t have to adjust your pace. Notices without pointing it out.
• Hugger. Not quick hugs—lingering, full-body, grounding hugs that reset your nervous system.
• Nervous about conflict but tries anyway. Chooses honesty even when his voice shakes.
• Celebrates your wins like they’re his own. Brags about you quietly to people he trusts.
• Very considerate in shared spaces. Lowers volume, adjusts lighting, checks in constantly.
Dating - NSFW ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
• Submissive in the trusting sense. He likes being guided, reassured, encouraged. Relaxes when you lead; blooms under calm direction. Will not beg you verbally, his eyes will do the talking.
• He gets affected before anything happens. The tension hits him early, fidgeting, quieter voice, attention locked on you. Loves when you make him wait. Not in a cruel way, just enough that the anticipation turns him pliant and focused.
• If you touch him casually beforehand, it throws him off completely. Takes him a second to recover. The type to wait 5 minutes at the walmart parking lot because you kissed him. iykyk
• Nervous smiles when he knows where things are heading.
• Praise-focused. Gentle encouragement turns him warm and pliant faster than teasing ever could. He doesn’t have a favorite position but he prefers to do it while he can see your face.
• Touch-starved but patient. Waits for cues, melts the moment you give them. Will hump the shit out of you if you take too long though.
• Responsive and attentive, mirrors your pace, checks your reactions, adjusts instantly. Will melt if you “use” him to make yourself feel good.
• Whispers instead of talks. Soft sounds, quiet reactions, your name said like it’s fragile.
• LOUDEST MOANER. He is NOT afraid to make noise. Makes super soft involuntary sounds when overwhelmed or overstimulated, incredibly telling, incredibly honest.
• Shy when things heat up, but never withdrawn. Quiet agreement, tries to keep steady eye contact even though he gets super shy.
• Thrives on reassurance during and after. Needs to know he did well; you make sure he knows.
• Gets bolder the more you reassure him. Confidence grows with every kind word.
• If you tell him what you like, he memorizes it. Treats it like something important.
• Responds best to encouragement over command. Gentle guidance keeps him steady and eager.
• Will look to you afterward for confirmation. Just a “keep going” will make him do what he is doing for another hour. Your approval settles him completely.
• Soft sounds, softer hands afterward. Wants closeness more than anything.
• Aftercare is non-negotiable for him—water, warmth, arms around you until everything settles.
BONUS ⋆✴︎˚。⋆
• The type to blush after instead of before. Processing takes time.
• Definitely has a sex playlist. Mostly The Weeknd.
• Very responsive to tone. You don’t need to touch him to get a reaction; a calm, confident voice does more than enough.
set up | chapter two
miya atsumu x reader
When the new MSBY Black Jackals's PR head comes to town, you have three rules: stay focused, stay sharp, and stay away from Miya Atsumu. From your worst nightmare at sixteen to Japan’s heartthrob, Atsumu has always attracted trouble. You're here to do your job but unbeknownst to you, the universe has other plans. So when fate sets the ball, will Atsumu be the one to receive it? genre: fluff, angst, enemies to lovers, slow burn, pining, childhood rivals, second chance romance, humour, suggestive themes, explicit smut. notes: 5.8k... oopsie. business trip to okinawa gone wrong lol. crack, fluff and lots of tension!!!!
series masterlist -> chapter three
Your trolley rolls behind you as you inhale the fresh Okinawa breeze, a far cry from crowded Tokyo. With a slow stretch, you lift both arms overhead, easing the tension that’s settled in your body after the long flight.
Hinata dashes past you, springing into the air. “The waves await me!”
In your peripheral vision, you see Meian chasing after him. You grin, glad to see everyone pumped and ready as you prop your hands on your hips.
Pocari Sweat, one of the team’s sponsors, in their long list of contract obligations, required the team to shoot an ad to promote their drink. And, if truth be told, you may or may not have pushed this idea instead of the other ones from the agency just because you wanted a short, fully funded trip to the beach.
The sky is a clear cloudless blue and the sun is blinding.
Sakusa falls into step beside you, uncharacteristically, pulling his mask down and letting out a hum.
You turn to him, “Ready for the shoot?”
He nods, “I studied the script extra hard last night to get some free time to buy extra wipes.”
Your brows furrow in confusion, “Wipes?”
Sakusa’s face turns solemn as if he’s seen a ghost. “Yes…” he begins.
“Public…” A few moments pass, and he looks like he’s gathering the courage to complete his sentence.
“Sand.”
You sigh, “Of course,” agreeing for his sake.
Sakusa was a germaphobe, and you may have pushed that thought to the back of your head when you approved this script.
You almost rub your hands together super villain style when you think of all the good bts footage you’ll get to film of the team’s antics for their socials.
“Stop being a little wuss,” Atsumu calls out from behind.
“We’re playing beach volleyball,”
Atsumu shoots both his fists inwards in a macho motion, surpassing both of you as he finishes his sentence in a backwards jog to the van.
Sakusa scrunches his eyebrows in annoyance before mumbling something along the lines of needing to exterminate Atsumu.