haven’t shifted here yet but it’s fun to imagine kissing my man and i’m ovulating so yeah (this is just for my enjoyment🙂↕️)
“you can’t kiss me again,” i almost whimper once his lips part from my own. i step back a little. it’s a feeble attempt to keep myself from falling into him again.
and it’s not that i didn’t want to. i want to. but— “i can’t? really?” he asks breathlessly. it was genuine confusion, not some challenge to make me change my mind. and it makes sense because 5 seconds ago, i let him with no hesitation.
i shake my head quickly, a little too quick but his steps are already following my own—he always follows me. it’s this automatic response he has now, from weeks of shadowing my every move, and it was officially biting me in the ass.
“i’m betrothed.” i say it like it just came back to me. and my expression is just as shocked as his. “you’re what?” he exclaims.
i start explaining, even though i don’t know where to start. even though i don’t have the words ready. we’re still doing that “where you go, i go” thing, until i feel stone behind me. and hiccup is hardly following my words, it seems. just the sound of my voice and the way my lips look as i move them. his eyes are pinned there like he’s starving and i’m the last warm meal in the world.
he leans in again, as if he has no control anymore and kisses me—this time his hand coming up to plant itself on the wall next to my head as his other snakes its way around my body. it’s needy. it’s hot. and nothing like the one prior because now it feels like he’s kissing me to prove something, or forget something, or replace it all with me—i don’t know but it’s way too much so i pull away.
just enough to where i’m gasping and dizzy. his hand stays at my waist, the other still braced against the rock like he’s trying not to fold in on himself. “gah,” he groans, turning his face slightly, cursing at himself under his breath. “i’m sorry,” he apologizes. “it’s just—i can’t help myself,” his voice is wrecked. honest. a little scared. and maybe he should be.
because if this situation was any less dire than it is right now, i’d let him keep kissing me. i’d let his hands map every inch of my body as i climbed into his lap and pressed my chest to his. tugging the curls i just tangled as i unraveled for him. i swallowed hard— the feeling becoming too much for me to bear.
“we have to get out of this cave.” i relent, looking to the exit as if it was our hail mary. like the cool air near the mouth of the tunnel might snap me back to reality.
“good plan.” he agrees hoarsely as i usher us out.
a very very messy draft of our first kiss loosely based on that lovely little tasm scene where gwen cleans peter’s wounds and he’s breathless and needy and absolutely the most beautiful he’s ever been. #needthatBAD
