My mother, talking about an event her friend is hosting: I don't know if she'll like my lazy costume, I think she wanted more of an actual costume.
Her: *is dressed as a baseball fan with a jersey, hat, and leggings*
Me: You want to borrow my bat? You could be a baseball player
Her: No, I don't want to have to carry it around.
My older brother, now concerned: Why do you have a bat?
Me, shrugging: I bought it at Walmart
Him: That... That doesn't answer my question















