I had a small upswing of energy/suicidal ideation(they tend to go hand in hand with me) a little while ago which freak me out so I booked a bunch of appointments. Normally I would have been so anxious by the time they came I would no show. I took the opportunity to go to get referred to a social worker, get a massage(and acupuncture! I was a skeptic but now Im like?!?!?!?!?), refill my retinols and facial stuff, and getting new mealworms and a large wheel for our newest Hedgehog!!! She is a rescue and my partner named her Professor Babycorn, I am in love but very fussy mom mode. The most important is that I finally got put on medication and now Im a very fine owner of a citalopram prescription. An entire lifetime of being Professionally Mentally Ill™ and I am unpacking the shame of medication, I am both nervous/scared(I couldnt pull the trigger on taking them last night so Im starting tonight) and excited.