Apr 21, 2024
*on the phone* Amy: Jake, I'm breaking up - Jake: I'm pregnant! Amy: ...I meant the call Jake: Thank god - right, sorry. I panicked.
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*on the phone* Amy: Jake, I'm breaking up - Jake: I'm pregnant! Amy: ...I meant the call Jake: Thank god - right, sorry. I panicked.
(Arriving at the precinct)
Jake: I just solved a one thousand pieces puzzle!
Amy: One hundred pieces, babe
Jake: I just solved a one hundred pieces puzzle!!
Noice! 🚓
Sauron: How was I supposed to know there'd be consequences for my actions?
Rosa: I can’t wait until I get a job at Starbucks because I’m going to spell everyone’s name wrong so they can’t instagram their cups.
Santiago: are you satan?
Hitchcock: are you god?
Terry: are we humans?
Gina: Or are we dancer?
Jake: is this the real life
Charles: or is this just fantasy
Doug: No this is Patrick
Small, secretive and proud smiles from captain Holt when Jake does something minutely great is all i live for.
Seth: I gotta go
Listener: Aren't you forgetting something?
Seth: Uhhhh *kisses their forehead and leaves awkwardly*
Listener: No! Pay your bill!
Listener: Damn who raised you?
Jake:I swear you will do anything to get attention
Gina:said the narcissist
Jake:said the other narcissist