Discover Top Posts Tagged with #incorrect b99

*on the phone* Amy: Jake, I'm breaking up - Jake: I'm pregnant! Amy: ...I meant the call Jake: Thank god - right, sorry. I panicked.

(Arriving at the precinct)

Jake: I just solved a one thousand pieces puzzle!

Amy: One hundred pieces, babe

Jake: I just solved a one hundred pieces puzzle!!

Noice! 🚓

Sauron: How was I supposed to know there'd be consequences for my actions?

Rosa: I can’t wait until I get a job at Starbucks because I’m going to spell everyone’s name wrong so they can’t instagram their cups.

Santiago: are you satan?

Hitchcock: are you god?

Terry: are we humans?

Gina: Or are we dancer?

Jake: is this the real life

Charles: or is this just fantasy

Doug: No this is Patrick

Small, secretive and proud smiles from captain Holt when Jake does something minutely great is all i live for.

Seth: I gotta go

Listener: Aren't you forgetting something?

Seth: Uhhhh *kisses their forehead and leaves awkwardly*

Listener: No! Pay your bill!

Listener: Damn who raised you?

Jake:I swear you will do anything to get attention

Gina:said the narcissist

Jake:said the other narcissist

#incorrect b99