#incorrect tgp

[the-supreme-g0ddess]

Janet: There is no future. There is no past. Don't you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every fact.

Eleanor: ...All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

[serpentinesomebody]

Eleanor: I told Michael his ears flush when he’s lying.

Chidi: Why?

Eleanor: Look.

Eleanor: Hey Michael! Do you love us?

Michael, covering his ears: No.

[57bees]

Michael

Janet

Jason

Tahani

Eleanor

Chidi

Vicky

Mindy St. Claire

Judge Gen

Shawn

[incorrect-thegoodplace-quotes]

Eleanor: Okay, thanks dad.

Michael: Do you see me as a father figure, Eleanor?

Eleanor: No! If anything I see you as a bother figure, 'cause you're always bothering me.

Tahani: Hey, show your father some respect!

Eleanor: I did not call him dad.

Michael: No, no, Eleanor. I take it as a compliment.

Jason: It's not a big deal. I called Janet mom once, and she's my girlfriend.

Eleanor: Guys, jump on that. Jason has psycho-sexual issues!

Tahani: Old news. But you calling Michael daddy.

Eleanor: Hey, daddy is not on the table here.

Chidi: Well, you did call him dad.

Eleanor: You shut up. This meeting is about you lying for the first time in your life, man.

Chidi: Okay, I was lying about eating the last popsicle, but the dad thing happened.

Eleanor: A-ha! I got him to admit he was lying. It was all part of my crazy, devious plan.

Michael: I believed you-

Eleanor: Thank you!

Michael: -daughter. Would you like to talk about it later over a game of catch?

Eleanor: I'd like that.

[serpentinesomebody]

Human Michael: *injured and bleeding severely*

EMT: Whats your blood type?

Human Michael: Blood? Oh, yeah, I have that. It’s red.

EMT: No, I mean what what’s your blood type?

Human Michael, getting increasingly confused: It’s red???

[serpentinesomebody]

Michael: So...you guys trust me, right?
Chidi: Normally I’d say yes, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I‘m a little scared.

[incorrect-thegoodplace-quotes]

Michael: Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun boss?

Shawn: Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.

[incorrect-thegoodplace-quotes]

Eleanor: How much could I possibly owe you? Fifty, sixty bucks?

Chidi: Two thousand, four hundred and thirty seven dollars.

Eleanor: Dollars?! Wait, of course dollars. Why was that the part I was surprised by?