#ineffable divorcées

[supersonic-rocket-ship]

Crowley is the WORST backseat driver in the history of the automobile

- yells at you to break the law

- disagrees with the music

- isn’t even in the car

[siriusly-the-best-bi]

guys the kiss was so important especially from a narrative and storytelling perspective because it was literally Crowley taking everything that's happened between them, every unsaid intention and every unspoken promise, and making it physical.

He's taking their arrangement and every other bullshit excuse they've ever used to hide how they feel about each other and throwing them out the window to put their feelings into an undeniable physical action that holds a lot of meaning to humans in order to be absolutely sure that Aziraphale knows exactly what he means when he says "we could have been Us." He wants to be absolutely sure that there are no misunderstandings between them and know that Azirphale will be committing to this decision with absolute reassurance that he's been understood and rejected anyway.

he's taking a human action with so much meaning and so much importance, and he's using it as a way to desperately make Aziraphale completely and undeniably aware of what he's stating. No more charades and no more lies or cover-ups. There's no denying this thing between them now, and Crowley did it the human way. Because he and Aziraphale love humanity and it's everything to them in their own ways.

There's a reason we saw a kiss between Crowley and Aziraphale, and not Gabriel and Beelzebub, despite them both being undeniable foils.

and really if you just think about that isn't it so god damned beautiful?

[stitched-up-teddy-bear]

The Coffee Theory

This theory is by the fantastic @jumbledstars on TikTok

This Theory is for everyone who felt betrayed or hurt by Aziraphale in the season 2 finale or just doesn’t trust The Metatron!!!

The theory goes that the coffee The Metatron gives Aziraphale made him "switch side"

When Metatron invited Aziraphale for a chat, Aziraphale made it clear that he does not wish to follow him until he took a sip from the coffee. Metatron quote on quote forces Aziraphale to drink it rather than offering it casually. After the first sip, Aziraphale suddenly agreed to chat with him. At that moment, Metatron bitterly glanced back at Crowley, catching his attention.

In the coffee shop, Metatron reveals his plan to make Aziraphale the new supreme archangel and commander of the heavenly host, which surprises Aziraphale as he wonders where he would get his coffee. This struck me as odd because we never saw him drink coffee in the series until now.

As Aziraphale walks home, his expression appears more disoriented than when he's in the bookshop, suggesting the coffee may be affecting his brain.

Aziraphale excitedly tells Crowley about the "good news," saying that Crowley can finally be an angel again. However, Crowley disagrees, seeing heaven as equally bad as hell.

Aziraphale comments, "Of course you would disagree with hell, you're the bad guys, but heaven..." This also strikes me as odd because Aziraphale doesn't usually talk about hell or demons in that manner anymore. The last time was during the car ride in season one before they crashed into Anathema.

Furthermore, Aziraphale wouldn't be motivated enough to make a change in heaven, as he and Crowley have been on Team Earth for a while now and seem content with it. Crowley notices this and tells Aziraphale, "We're better than that. YOU'RE better than that!" He senses that something is wrong with Aziraphale or at least suspects it.

After Crowley's confession and (let’s be honest) unexpected kiss (which left Aziraphale confused and regretful), Metatron returns to the bookshop, asking him if he's ready to go, contradicting what he said just 8 minutes ago about giving Aziraphale all the time he needs to make a choice. It's as if Metatron already knows what Aziraphale will choose.

I think Crowley's confession or kiss has momentarily snapped Aziraphale back to reality, as he shows genuine concern for his bookshop and is reluctant to leave. Although Metatron assures him that Muriel will look after it, Aziraphale still appears hesitant and confused.

When asked if he needs to bring something, Aziraphale seems lost and unsure of what to do. However, he eventually regains his composure and follows Metatron with a smile.

Thank you for reading! This theory came from @jumbledstars on TikTok and it’s way too good to ignore! Link to the original theory below!!!

Had to post here because twitter doesnt let me post longer videos 💀 #Goodomens2 #goodomensspoilers #gos2spoilers

[chaoticace2005]

Okay so with all this talk about how our idiotic angel and demon still can’t communicate- I figured I’d try my hand at breaking down some dialogue from their “divorce.” The biggest issue is the fact that both are saying things to try and be together, but the other is misinterpreting everything they’re saying. They essentially just threw what the other person was saying through google translate a dozen times and only heard what it spat out.

This is my interpretation of what the characters seemed to have been trying to say vs what the other heard. Feel free to comment if you have any differing ideas of interpretation! I’m running on like 3 hours of sleep.

A: Come with me, to heaven. I’ll run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference. (We can work together and then can create a world where we can be happy together.) (We can fix heaven, I can fix you.)

C: You can’t leave this bookshop. (You can’t leave me) (What about earth? What about all the earthly things you love here?)

A: Oh Crowley, nothing lasts forever. (It’s okay, it doesn’t matter as long as we can be together.) (We weren’t meant to last forever.) (this is from Crowley’s POV where he officially gets rejected)

C: No. No I suppose it doesn’t. Good luck. (I understand, you don’t want us to be together.)

(Crowley starts to leave) (it’s only at this point Aziraphale seems to realize that Crowley is turning him down)

A: “Good luck?” Crowley? Crowley come back! …to heaven. Work with me. We can be together. Angels! Doing good! I- I need you! I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you. (Where are you going?! Don’t go! We can save the world and be happy together.) (Come to heaven. We can be angels. You can become good. Once you’ve changed we can be together!)

C: I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do. (You can’t change anything. Not the corrupt system and not me. They’re toying with you and you should be smarter than this. You shouldn’t WANT this.) (I don’t want to be with you. It’s too much work. I hate heaven too much to be with you.) (this is from Aziraphale’s POV where he officially gets rejected)

A: Well, then there’s nothing more to say. (I understand, you don’t want us to be together.) (Okay then, you can go. We’re done.)

C: Listen. Hear that?

A: I don’t hear anything.

C: That’s the point. No nightingales. You idiot. We could have been us. (Why am I not enough you? Why can’t you stay?) (You’re not enough for me. I won’t go.)

(Crowley kisses Aziraphale) (Please stay- at least understand I love you. If you’re going away this is my only chance.) (Goodbye, I’m not going with you so this is my only chance.)

A: I forgive you. (I forgive you for not wanting to come with me, you don’t want us to be together, I understand. Goodbye) (I still have to go. I forgive you for kissing me though, and for not wanting to go to heaven with me. You just aren’t enough for me.)

C: Don’t bother. (I’m not sorry for kissing you and I don’t want you to go. I’m never going to be an angel and that’s not going to change.) (No, I don’t forgive you. You aren’t enough for me. Goodbye.)

[redshoes-blues]

I love how Crowley didn’t even hesitate to go talk to Aziraphale after Nina and Maggie advised him to. He really said “fair enough, lesbians know best”

[tearsonthepage]

i made this for crowley to use 💕💕💕

[aroaceblackhole]

I just finished our flag means death, and why do I keep getting emotionally invested in the depression gays???? First the Ineffable Divorce, and now the Blackbonnet breakup😭😭😭😭😭

[teetering-dinosaur]

nobody understands aziraphale like i do