(Triangle) how easy was it for you to leave Forsyth? You already left your village and family behind, so Forsyth was naturally the next step
Python’s eyes widen. The question about Forsyth is already something he’d rather not talk about, but to ask it in such a callous way, and equate it with leaving his village- which he’d done for Forsyth-
He knows damn well that this is probably what plenty of people think about him. That he’d rather drift across the continent than stay and dedicate himself to the service of the kingdom…and that he didn’t care enough about anyone, even Forsyth, to choose otherwise. Python, too lazy and selfish to give a shit about anyone or anything, right? It must not have bothered him a bit.
It would be easy to lie and confirm that, but the truth was that he’d quietly agonized over it for weeks before telling his plans to anyone. Never over the choice itself- as soon as he was even informally offered the knighthood, he knew he didn’t want it. But he’d had no idea how to break it to Forsyth that he was going to leave. After all, he’d always been a pessimist at heart- the last thing he’d wanted was to see Forsyth broken enough to give up on his dream, but it had seemed inevitable, and he’d been prepared to stick with him and pick up the pieces. They could still have made a life for themselves- as hired soldiers or mercenaries, or eventually settling down and living their days out in peace. It didn’t matter much to him- whatever else Forsyth set his sights upon, Python would have remained at his side. But he’d never even considered whether he’d follow if Forsyth became a knight, because that would never actually happen.
Except that it had, and Python had been at a loss. More than once, he’d considered briefly if he could put his personal feelings aside and stay for Forsyth’s sake. The soldier game had always been temporary and he’d been fine with that, but he didn’t have any other grand dreams to fulfill, and after all, being a knight would keep him fed as well as anything else. But the idea of fully pledging his loyalty and his life to the royalty and nobility of the so-called new kingdom (as if anything about it was different) nearly made his skin crawl, and he knew it was never truly an option.
Finally blindsiding Forsyth with the news- because, ever the optimist, it still hadn’t even occurred to Forsyth that he would turn the offer down- had been easily the worst moment of his life. Any plans they’d had for a life together were tenuous at best, since they both knew that they could be snatched away at any moment by an enemy’s blade. But Forsyth at least had had them nonetheless, and Python had never expected to be the one to take that away from him. He wouldn’t change the choice he made, and they still see each other as often as they can, but the confusion and heartbreak on Forsyth’s face when he’d realized that Python couldn’t be persuaded to stay still comes unbidden to his mind when he least wants it there.
All he says aloud is, “Nothing about that was easy. Go to hell.“
