#it's brain exploding multiverse thinking time

[synodicsoma]

Don't mind me... just got that itch to indulge in more crack ships... need to get back to drawing Guzma x (Yami) Marik and then Junkrat x Stanley has been invading my brain recently too. I've also considered Ford x Junkrat's Junkenstein skin too.

[vidrkness]

Second nature

Pairing: Agatha Harkness x female!reader

Summary: The bruise is still present and when you though things were getting better you fall again into your knees, scraping even more.

Word count: 5k

Warnings: power imbalance, age gap, imposter syndrome, power dynamics, angst, Agatha needs a hug.

A/N: DISCLAIMER: reader is about to go through a rough patch and make some absolutely wrong decisions. So be gentle lol I promise things will get better… eventually. I have another chapter finished to upload before the holiday break, see you guys soon!

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Chapter eleven: Lapsus

“Every atom of your flesh is as dear to me as my own: in pain and sickness it would still be dear.”

“I’m serious, that was the stupidest movie I’ve seen in a long time. I loved it” Billy says as he drains the last of his drink.

When you step out of the theater, the fresh air hits your cheeks instantly, reminding you that you’re still very much alive. The past week had been an absolute nightmare and this weekend was the only thing standing between you and what was coming. Starting Monday, you’d be back on your neuro rotation, which meant orbiting around Agatha again, twelve hours a day, five days straight.

And you were still trying to decide whether that was a good thing… or a fucking nightmare.

Great. 

You snort “I don’t think I’ve ever seen that much fake blood in my life, and we literally work in a hospital”

You fall back into step with Billy as you cross the parking lot, the cool night settling around you.

“I still can’t believe they killed the dog” he says, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets “I thought we had rules in cinema”

“Oh, please. After the third exploding head, the dog was the least of their concerns”

Billy opens his mouth to reply, but his phone buzzes. He glances down and a slow, dopey smile spreads across his face.

“You okay? You are using all your face muscles” You tease 

Billy elbows you, but he’s still smiling at the screen “It’s just Eddie, he’s asking if I got out of the movies okay. He worries”

“Wait, is the one who believed in lizard people?” you asked, eating from your leftover popcorn.

He snorts “Dude, no. That one was… this one is the cute one. The architect”

You frowned, genuinely trying to remember. But honestly? Following Billy’s dating history was like trying to keep track of the multiverse. At the start of the year he’d been convinced he was getting married, only to dump the guy because he hated Wicked.

“Oh my god, you’re such a bad friend” he sighed “I want a divorce”

You gasped, dramatic “No, please. I’m not ready to be a single mother”

Billy rolled his eyes “You are the worst”

“Yeah, breaking news” You stuck your tongue out at him “But I do remember Eddie. Curly hair, pretty eyes” You gave him a warm, honest smile “He seems pretty great”

Before he can retort, his phone starts ringing. Eddie’s name lights up the screen.

Billy winces apologetically “Ups, I should take this. He gets nervous at night”

“Go” you say, waving him off “I’ll try not to get kidnapped in the next ninety seconds”

Billy mouths thank you and steps a few paces away, turning his back to you as he answers. His voice drops into that soft, warm tone you’ve only ever heard him use with people he really cares about.

Left alone, you wrap your arms around yourself, staring out at the nearly empty parking lot. Just you, the distant hum of traffic and Billy murmuring into the phone like he’s trying not to smile too hard.

And suddenly loneliness hits you like a train wreck. 

At first, it’s just a faint buzzing under your skin, like your nerves are trying to warn you before your brain catches up.

Agatha.

The name drifts through your thoughts like a ripple at first, then a wave… then a punch to the sternum. You shouldn’t be thinking about her. Not now.

Not after everything.

But the quieter it gets, the louder she becomes.

You remember the way she would tilt her head when listening to you ramble about nothing. The soft, practiced patience in her eyes, not forced, not polite, but real. How she’d sit through those ridiculous B-list horror movies you loved, even though she hated gore, just because it meant being next to you.

How she’d always save you the green gummy bears because they were the only ones you liked and you pretended not to notice she remembered.

You remember how good she was to you.

And how bad you were at handling her.

How you ruined everything with one panicked, explosive, insecure reaction. Because some old, festering part of you was so used to being abandoned that you started swinging before anyone could drop you. Because she hid something from you, yes, but not out of malice. Not out of betrayal. Just… a mistake. A human one.

But humans with trauma don’t react like humans. They react like cornered animals.

Your chest tightens suddenly, the asphalt beneath your feet feels like it’s tilting forward, like the world is slowly pitching you off its surface. The lights blur and for some reason the flickering lamp of the parking lot seems to be the most interesting thing in the world that you drift like a moth to the flame.

Billy steps closer, lowering his voice “Okay. You’re doing that thing where you look like a one of those period ghosts”

You chuckle “It’s okay, just… brain shut down for a bit”

“Okaaay” he says carefully “So, is it okay if we rain-check the whole getting hammered at your place plan? Eddie invited me over. And I kinda… wanna go?”

The words hit you heavily, that meant being alone and being alone meant overthinking, exhaustion , eventually crying and just… loneliness.

Your throat works around a swallow that feels too thick. You try to nod, try to be a normal person, a good friend, someone who doesn’t fall apart just because she’s alone for ninety goddamn seconds.

“Yeah” you manage, though your voice sounds wrong. “Yeah, of course. Go. Please. Seriously”

Billy studies you for a second, absolutely not believing your words.

“Hey” he says softly, thumb brushing your knuckles “I can stay. Just say the word. I don’t care if I already told him yes. I’ll stay”

You shake your head automatically. Too fast. 

“B I’m fine, really. Jus go”

“Mhm, you’re not” he says simply. Not accusing or being dramatic, just honest.

And somehow that honesty hurts more than anything.

Because you’re tired of not being fine.

Tired of being a mess over Agatha.Tired of ruining things because you can’t stop your brain from eating itself alive.

“I’m okay” you repeat, almost convincing yourself “Go and have fun, you deserve it”

Billy’s eyes soften. Worried, but trusting you enough not to push.

“Okay, but you text me when you get home. Not negotiable”

“Will do, don’t worry. I’ll send you pics of clementine sleeping” you say.

He gives you a quick but grounding hug “Please! I’ll be waiting”

“Yeah, yeah. Go! don’t keep your prince charming waiting” 

Billy jogs backward toward his car, pointing two fingers at his eyes and then at you in the world’s most dramatic I’m watching you gesture. You flip him off with love, then he disappears into the darkness of the parking lot, leaving you alone with the hum of streetlights.

You breathe out, long and a little bit shaky.

“Okay” you murmur to no one “So we’re doing this, alone time. Super fun”

You shove your hands into your pockets and start walking. Just… walking. The theater lot isn’t big, but it feels endless tonight, one of those liminal, echoing places where even your own footsteps sound too loud. You keep your gaze forward, pretending you don’t feel the tight buzzing behind your ribs.

You’re halfway to your car when a thought flickers through your head.

Carol.

Your chest loosens a little, maybe.

She’d told you earlier this week, after that hellish shift, that you could call her “whenever your brain starts doing mental gymnastics without permission” Her words. You’d laughed at the time, but now the memory feels like a hand steadying you between the shoulder blades.

Before you can overthink it you pull out your phone and thumb her contact.

The line rings once.

Twice.

“Hey, doc” Carol’s voice slides through the speaker, a little amused and grounding in a way you don’t want to examine too closely “You alive or do I need to come scoop you off a sidewalk?”

You snort softly “Alive. Mostly. Are you doing anything?”

There’s a beat of shuffling, like she’s moving around, keys jingling “Just came back home from the groceries. What’s up?”

You push air out through your nose, trying to sound casual instead of like you’re one wrong breath from unraveling “Was thinking… if you wanted to grab a drink? Or, like, watch me drink while you responsibly hydrate. Either works”

Carol doesn’t hesitate “Yeah! Yeah, let’s do it”

The relief hits so sharply you cough on it “Cool” 

“Where you at?”

“At the movies on the main, just got out” You say.

“Oh! There’s a dive bar near the theater” she continues. You can hear her grin through the phone “Ugly green sign, smells like someone tried to Febreze a crime scene. Fantastic pizza, though. You know that one?”

“Unfortunately” you say “On my way”

“Good. Sit inside, okay? Don’t wait in the alley. That’s deeply suspicious protagonist behavior”

You let out an actual laugh “Fine. I’ll be unsuspicious. For you”

“That’s all I ask. See you in ten”

You hang up. And for the first time all night, the parking lot doesn’t feel so suffocating. You head toward the bar. Inside, the dive bar is exactly as terrible as you remember, dim lights, a jukebox that prays for retirement and a very unlucky bartender that looks like he’s been awake against his will for too long.

The place is comforting in its own tragic way.

You slide into a booth near the back, tapping your fingers on the sticky tabletop, the weight in your chest easing just enough for you to breathe without wincing.

You don’t check your phone.

You don’t think about Agatha.

Or you try not to.

Instead, you breathe in the warm, stale bar air and let the noise settle around you, imperfect, human, grounding.

Carol will be here soon. And for tonight… that feels like enough.

She arrives in exactly nine minutes and you pretend you don’t notice the way her eyes scan the bar before landing on you with that small, relieved little half-smile.

“You beat your ETA” you say as she slides into the booth.

“Yeah, well” She shrugs out of her hoodie “That’s just the EMT nerd inside me, I guess”

You roll your eyes “You are indeed a nerd”

She chuckles, waving the bartender over “Hey! Can we get two beers and pepperoni pizza, please?”

“Bless you” you whisper.

The first twenty minutes are easy, shockingly so. You catch her up on Billy’s dramatic romantic saga and she tells you about her boss and his growing addiction to mini trains collectibles . You laugh so hard you nearly drop your beer.

When the food arrives, you reach for the same slice and end up brushing fingers. Carol just smirks like she expected it.

You stick your tongue out at her. She pretends to grab it.

And maybe it’s the alcohol or the warm buzz of the bar, or just the relief of being with someone who doesn’t make your chest contract, but your shoulders loosen. Your breathing evens and you feel so relaxed it feels illegal.

“Pool?” Carol asks, chin tipping toward the old, lopsided table in the corner.

“Okat, warning: I am terrible” you inform her as she hands you a cue.

“That’s fine” she says, lining up a perfect break “I’m amazing. Someone needs to balance the cosmic scales”

“Wow” you mutter “Love humility in a woman”

She sinks the first ball with unfair ease.

You miss. Repeatedly, dramatically. At one point you somehow send the cue ball bouncing off the table entirely.

Carol stares at you “…That’s a talent”

“Shut up, it’s part of my charm”

She’s laughing too hard to aim properly after that, which is the only reason you manage to make a single pity shot. When you do, she cheers like you hit the golden buzzer. It’s ridiculous. 

And it makes you actually enjoy your life for a minute.

You migrate to the dartboard next, half because you need to redeem yourself and half because you kind of like the way Carol lights up whenever you challenge her.

“Okay, super doc” she says, hands on her hips “Show me what you got”

You throw your first dart.

Bullseye.

Carol blinks “I- what the hell?”

You shrug modestly, picking up the next dart “Maybe I’m just gifted”

“Gifted my ass” she mutters, stepping behind you “Show me again”

You throw.

Another bullseye.

Carol places her hands dramatically on her knees and leans over like she’s winded “Oh my god, I hate you”

“Why? Because I’m talented? Because I’m beautiful?” you tease.

“Maybe” she says, straightening with a grin that makes your stomach dip 

You stick your tongue out again and she tries to grab it again, it becomes a thing.

Then three college guys with guitars and one girl who looks like she could kill a man with her lethal cat eye, take the small stage getting ready with their set up. You’re both pleasantly buzzing, leaning into each other more out of comfort than necessity.

The music is loud and messy and perfect. Carol bumps your shoulder and you nudge her back. Her knee brushes yours and she doesn’t move it. Neither do you. You look at her during a song, her cheeks warm from the alcohol, hair pulled back in that perfectly messy way, eyes soft and focused entirely on you.

And something happens inside you. Because it is not Agatha who you are looking at right now and for some reason you feel a lot of things, sadness, anger to yourself, to everything even when it’s no one's fault but yours. 

Only yours.

Carol’s smile tilts, a bit nervous but that doesn’t stop her. She leans in, hesitating just long enough for you to understand what’s happening.

And then her lips touch yours.

It’s soft, brief, barely a test of pressure. But it sends electricity straight down your spine.Carol pulls back immediately, eyes wide, breath catching.

“Shit-” she says, rubbing the back of her neck “Fuck, I- I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”

Before she finishes the sentence, you’re already leaning forward and kissing her again.

Because thinking has never gotten you anywhere good.

Because your judgment has been questionable lately.

Because you are just… tired. Tired of being you.

And because Carol is just there and that need of feeling secured to the ground is the thing she can offer you right now.

So fuck it. You take it.

Her hand finds your cheek. Yours curl in the fabric of her shirt. She pulls back just enough to whisper “…Okay. So we’re doing this?”

You nod, breath warm against her lips “Yeah. Yeah, we’re doing this”

Carol’s mouth crashes back into yours like she’s been holding herself back for a long time. The music loud and hypnotizing, the bar lights flicker against her jaw and the world narrows down to the warmth of her hands, the taste of her breath, the way she exhales like she’s finally exhaling you.

Your back hits the cushion of the booth and you both laugh breathlessly into the kiss. It’s messy and eager and so, so easy to fall into.

“Bathroom?” Carol murmurs against your lips, a question, not a push.

You nod without thinking. Because adding another mistake to your collection doesn’t feel that bad right now.

She laces her fingers with yours and pulls you down the dim hall, slipping into the single-stall restroom and locking the door behind you. The moment it clicks shut, her hands are on your hips, your shirt, your jaw, fucking everywhere and nowhere all at once.

You kiss her like you’re trying to outrun something and she kisses you like she doesn’t know you’re running.

Her lips trail along your jaw and stay suspiciously for a moment in your neck. You feel the faint sting in your skin and a quiet sound leaves your mouth, making Carol groan. Her thumb brushing your cheek and you feel your heartbeat spike, want tangled with guilt, guilt braided with want. Her mouth finds yours again and your hands curl into the front of her shirt because grounding yourself feels easier than pulling away.

She presses closer, her knee sliding between your legs and your breath catches.

And then,

Agatha.

Her face flashes through your mind like a match dropped on gasoline.

Her laugh. Her patience. Her stupid gummy bears. Her hurt expression the last time you spoke.

The look she had when she realized you were walking away from her.

The way that ‘I miss you’ sounded like her last words before perishing.

“No” you whisper before you can stop yourself “Wait- Carol, wait-”

Carol freezes instantly. She’s breathing hard but her eyes sharpen, shifting from heat to concern with whiplash speed.

“Hey” Her voice lowers, steady “Hey, look at me”

You try, but your vision is blurring, your breath is too fast. Your whole body feels like a kicked beehive.

“I’m sorry” you choke out, bringing your hands to your face “I’m sorry, I just- I can’t-”

“Hey, you don’t have to explain” she says immediately, taking your hands in hers“You’re okay. It’s okay”

But you shake your head, tears already running down your cheeks , maybe from guilt, maybe from confusion, maybe from the weight of Agatha’s name lodged in your throat like glass.

‘What a fucking loser’ you think. Getting tangled with another incredible woman just to hurt her like this. 

Kate.

Carol.

Agatha.

Agatha…

It was bad, mean and fucking embarrasing. Trying to use Carol to forget someone who you absolutely know will never leave your system. 

What kind of person are you turning into?

“It’s not you” you manage to say but your voice weaves “It’s not. You didn’t- I’m just- I screwed everything up. I shouldn’t have started this, I-”

“Y/n” she takes your face into her hands, firmly “Look at me, you're not screwing anything up”

Your breath stutters. Carol steps a little close, just giving you some security.

“You’re overwhelmed” she says gently, giving you a warm smile “And that’s allowed. You’re allowed to stop”

Her softness cuts deeper than any judgment would have.

You put your hands over hers, trying not to fall apart “I’m so sorry”

She shakes her head “Stop apologizing. Come on, let’s get out. Bad vibes in here, right?”

She gives you a tiny, lopsided smile. Somehow, you manage one back. You both step out into the hallway. The cold bar air hits your skin, sobering you in seconds. The music suddenly feels too loud, the lights too bright, just too much.

“Wanna head out?” Carol asks quietly.

You nod “Yeah”

She handles the tab and calls an Uber later. Neither of you talk much on the ride, just soft silence and the city passing by outside the windows. Her presence steady beside you, no pressure, no anger, just understanding.

When the car stops in front of your house, you swallow hard.

“Carol, I… I’m sorry”

She looks at you and her expression is nothing but gentle.

“I know” she says “And it’s okay, really”

Your throat tightens again.

“We’re good” she adds “Promise. Just get some rest, alright?”

You nod “Yeah. I will”

You squeeze her hand before stepping out and she squeezes back. The Uber pulls away, and you stand on the sidewalk, watching the taillights fade into the dark.

When you finally get in and close the door behind you ,kick off your shoes, letting the house swallow you whole. Clementine pads up to you immediately, rubbing against your legs like she knows you need it. You scoop her up, tucking her under your chin and for a moment the world outside feels distant. Her tiny purrs vibrate into your chest and you almost convince yourself that’s enough to fill the hollowness.

You slide under the covers, still in your clothes and stare at the ceiling. The ceiling doesn’t answer. The day’s adrenaline has faded, leaving only the quiet, relentless churn of your mind.

Your chest twists with guilt and longing, frustration and regret. You can’t stop replaying the night, Carol’s kiss, the bathroom, your sudden retreat, Agatha’s ghost pressing down on every impulse. The frustration builds like a pressure cooker, you want connection, want release, but every time you reach for it, your own brain snatches it away. And the endless reasons why you’re not allowed to be happy. 

Why you always have to ruin it.

You curl tighter, burying your face in Clementine’s fur, breathing her in like it will ground you. 

It doesn’t.

And the next morning it’s more of the same, sunlight bleeding into your room like it’s mocking you. Your phone vibrates relentlessly across the nightstand. You squint at it, blinking into a sea of notifications. Billy. 

Hundreds of messages, some worried, some teasing, some exasperated.

“OMG are you alive??

“You better answer or I'll call the police!”

“Clementine pics pls!”

You inhale sharply, squinting again, thumbs fumbling to open the thread. The flood of texts makes your chest twist in a familiar mix of warmth and panic. You send him… everything. The whole fucking mess, the bathroom, the kiss. 

The guilt.

Clementine mews impatiently, nudging your hand. You pet her absently, scrolling through Billy’s messages, letting the concern and mild hysteria wash over you. It should feel grounding, but instead it just reminds you how… small and fragile you feel.

You force yourself out of bed to make breakfast and come back to bed with a tray of things you are barely touching. Clementine on your lap, leaving crumbs across your pajamas. You scroll mindlessly on your phone, answering a few messages but mostly letting the screen glow against your tired face.

The day stretches on, you get up for water, sink into the couch. Nap for an hour. Wake. Back to bed. Repeat. Every time your mind drifts to the night before, your chest tightens with the memory of Carol’s kiss and your retreat. You try to tell yourself it’s fine, that it’s normal, that you’re processing but it feels like wading through quicksand and every move forward pulls you under further.

By evening, you’ve barely left the bed, barely changed, barely breathed outside the bubble of blankets and quiet. 

You are… here. Physically present. Mentally shattered. Emotionally tangled. And alone, except for the little heartbeat of fur pressed into your chest.

It’s miserable. It’s soft misery, quiet and endless and you let it sit with you because you don’t know how to escape it yet.

And after all, you deserve that because it was all your fault, right?

— — —

By Monday things settle for a bit.

The hospital is the same chaos always but today it feels heavier, like it knows what you did this weekend. Or didn't. Or almost did. Or ruined.

You stand in the locker room tying your hair back with hands that won’t stop shaking, staring at your reflection like it might give you instructions.

Don’t fall apart.

Don’t think about her.

Don’t think about Carol.

Don’t think at all.

Billy leans against the lockers beside you, already in scrubs, way too awake for this hour.

“So” he says lightly, popping a piece of gum into his mouth “On a scale from ‘thriving’ to ‘feral raccoon found screaming behind a Denny’s’ where are we at?”

You deadpan “Raccoon”

“Yeah, I figured” He nudges your shoulder “You’ll be okay”

Your stomach drops at his words, what is even ‘be okay’ anymore?

And then, as  if summoned by the sheer power of dread, Agatha’s  voice cuts through the hallway outside the locker room.

“Interns. Conference room, now”

Your spine goes rigid and your body suddenly feels too cold to actually seem like you are alive.

Billy takes your hand immediately, like bringing you back from the distant void you were trying to hide. 

You glare at him weakly, but your feet move anyway, traitor that they are.

When you get there, Agatha stands at the head of the table. Arms crossed, tablet tucked under one elbow. She looks exactly the same, impossibly composed, her perfect hair down in a long cascade of soft waves, white coat crisp like she didn’t spend the last however-many weeks haunting your every thought.

She’s so perfect, just as always. But she looks… different.

Her eyes flick to you.

Just for half a second, but it’s enough to disarm you and your chest caves in.

“Good morning” she says to the small group of interns. Clipped, professional, like she’s never memorized the way you take your coffee or laughed with you at two a.m over bad takeout 

“We’re short-staffed today. Neurosurgery is on consult rotation with ER. You’ll both be rotating downstairs” She says, directing her attention to Billy and you.

Billy perks up “Ooh, trauma Mondays. My favorite flavor of chaos”

Agatha ignores him. Her gaze lingers on you a fraction longer this time, unreadable.

“You” she says, pointing with her tablet “Stick close. Observe unless I tell you otherwise”

“Yes, doctor Harkness,” you reply automatically, voice steady in a way you do not feel.

Billy shoots you a look that you pretend not to see.

Downstairs the ER is already a mess.

Monitors beep in overlapping rhythms, gurneys line the halls, nurses move like they’re choreographed. Adrenaline hums under your skin, familiar and grounding. For a blessed stretch of time, you get to be a doctor instead of a walking emotional bruise.

Alice welcomes you with a big smile as always, letting you know how much she missed your brain there. You trail Agatha from bed to bed, jotting notes, answering questions when prompted. She’s all sharp efficiency, clipped commands, hands steady even when everything else is on fire.

She doesn’t look at you unless she has to.

Which somehow feels like a favor. It would be a crime to even look her in the eye after everything.  

You’re helping Billy check vitals on a patient when the automatic doors at the far end of the ER burst open.

“Incoming!” someone yells.

A stretcher barrels in, two EMTs in navy uniforms and you know her walk before you even see her face.

Carol.

She’s moving fast, jaw set, one hand holding pressure at a patient’s head wound while the other gestures sharply at the trauma nurse.

“Thirty eight year old male, MVC, unrestrained driver” Carol rattles off “GCS fourteen on scene, possible head trauma, brief LOC-”

Her eyes lift.

They land on you.

For just a beat, her expression softens, something warm and relieved flickering across her face like she’s glad you’re real and standing there.

“-BP stable, pupils unequal” she finishes, turning back to the team.

Your heart stutters.

“Oh, damn” Billy whispers, looking at you.

“Billy” you hiss.

“What? I have eyes”

Agatha’s head turns.

She takes in the scene in one sweep: the patient, the chart, Carol.

And then-

You.

She watches Carol speak to you again, brief and professional now, clarifying something about the patient’s presentation. Carol gestures with her chin toward the CT bay. You nod, listening, focused.

Agatha’s jaw tightens. It’s subtle. Anyone else might miss it.

You don’t.

“CT now” Agatha says sharply, stepping forward “I’ll take over”

Carol steps back smoothly “All yours, doc”

Their eyes meet.

Something settles, not hostility but something colder. Measured.

Agatha gives a curt nod “Thank you”

Carol glances at you once more before following protocol, already moving to clean up and chart. As she passes, her shoulder brushes yours, accidental, just less than a second but grounding in a way your body reacts to before your brain can catch up.

Agatha sees it.

She turns on you immediately.

“Why are you still standing there?” she snaps “You’re not on break”

Your pulse spikes. “I- sorry, doctor Harkness”

“Go prep the consult notes. Now”

“Yes, ma’am” You spin on your heel and move, heat crawling up your neck. Billy gives you a wide-eyed look over his mask.

Jealousy?

Ten minutes later, you’re charting at the nurse station when Agatha appears beside you, close enough that you can smell her perfume, familiar and deeply unfair.

Her voice drops, low and sharp, meant only for you.

“This is a hospital” she says “Not a social hour”

Your fingers freeze over the keyboard “I wasn’t-”

She cuts you off “Whatever that was, leave it at the door. When you’re here, you work”

Her eyes search your face, something raw flickering beneath the irritation, hurt, maybe, buried under layers of control.

“I expect better” she finishes quietly.

You blink, her words sit heavy in your chest but you have no right to be surprised, at the end of the day it was you who did this, who brought you back to square one.

But a sudden fire rises up your throat.

“Hey, I’m sorry for everything but I wasn’t doing anything wrong, she was just giving me the patient stats” You say only for you two to listen.

“Well, it didn't seem like that to me. And excuse me to try to keep my doctors in line, it is already a shame you are parading around with that in your neck. Will it become a habit?” She says, and you can clearly see the annoyance in her face. 

Your hands fly instantly to your neck, you don’t have to see to know what she's talking about. Again, you screwed it.

Just what you absolutely fucking need.

She doesn’t look at you again, instead she straightens, professional mask snapping back into place.

“Get back to work” Agatha says, already walking away.

You sit there, staring at the screen, heart pounding so hard it makes your ears ring. Across the ER, Carol looks over, concern etched faintly into her brow.

You don’t look back.

You can’t.

Because you’re back where you started, caught between past and present, guilt and want, the woman you still love and the one who tried to be there when you were falling apart.



Fuck.

A/N 2: me to Agatha: good for her!

Tag list: @darlingaura @deathbylesbianwitches @jeridandridge @aru-son @sweetmidnights @milflovers4 @pianogirl2121 @6stolenangel9 @infernumlilith @cinnamongirlblogsworld @dandelions4us @absolute-memegarbage @upsidedowndanvers @jujuu23 @wifeofmanymilfs @yellowwallflowers @morgananyx @filmedbyharkness @theothersideofthescreen @greyella @angelxblink @neverfindmegone @harknessshi @dhampirlegacy0-0 @peskygremlin @vyvvycg @seaoflittlefires @w4ndsversew0nder @sunny8you @ilovepattilupone

[cooliocumbucket]

WY@

summary: what happens when you're caught during the invincible war by no goggles before he demolishes the guardians and you're "unfriendly" exes in his dimension.

notes: brent faiyaz and no sleep were the inspirations behind this one 🫡

shiesty mark and no!goggles mark are personal faves of mine but I'm sure if i wrote no!goggles like how he's seen 🤔 extra content for them regardless!

feel free to still request!

no goggles!mark x female!reader

tags: dubious consent, rough sex, female!reader, praise kink, mdni, 18+, light angst

i be doing shit i really shouldn't do fr....

"You know you are impossible to keep track of, man!" The alleyway your hunter had you cornered in seemed to grow tighter the further you ran, anywhere literally anywhere seemed to be better.

The dead-end made the reality of your situation feel even more damning and you grappled with what you were turning to face.

Invincible.

"I think you should probably stop there or are you gonna phase through the wall, Kitty Pryde?" He laughed at his own joke as your eyes frantically searched for an exit.

You knew Invincible, of course, you knew the insanely powerful superhero who flew around your city with freedom you wish you had but without the burden of lives, he insisted on saving.

This deranged bizzaro version that stood in front of you, wasn't him, however, and the familiarity he seemed to have with you made it even clearer.

"What is it with you and taking off, dude!?" Invincible asked and your brain flipped through memories to pinpoint when you'd been in the same vicinity.

"I thought with dimensions there were supposed to be like differences?" He pondered out loud, "Subtle but not so subtle shit across the multiverse you know?"

He was floating at first before his feet planted to the ground and personal space didn't exist between you anymore.

He tugged at a loose string on your t-shirt, his touch sending a shiver down your back.

Tears involuntarily began to stream down your face as death seemed to be an edge you were insanely close to teetering over.

"What the fuck are you crying for?" Invincible narrowed his eyebrows together in confusion, "If I wanted to hurt you, you'd be hurt, duh." He rolled his eyes like it was obvious. As if your heart wasn't going to beat out of your chest and explode on the ground at his feet from anxiety.

Your silence must've bothered him, Invincible inspecting your face even closer.

"You don't got anything to say?" He prodded, terrified blinking your response as he grew slightly frustrated.

"Come onnn, say something!" Invincible urged electricity in his eyes.

"Are you really not going to hurt me?"

"Hmmm I could,"On the spot, he wrapped a hand around your throat and you regretted ever learning how to speak, "It wouldn't take like any effort for me to crush your windpipe and pop your head off." You braced for him to do what he described instead he touched his forehead on yours.

"But killing you quick would defeat the purpose of finding you, ya know?"

Without thinking you shoved him as hard as you could from your space, a sudden boldness coursing through you that should've sealed your fate.

Instead he went back to gazing at you, the push having no effect on him in any capacity.

"How the fuck do you know who I am!?" There were plenty of other things you could've asked but your brain was barely processing this interaction to think of them.

Why did it have to be you?

Why were you targeted by the lunatic?

"If two plus two equals four, and portals equal multiple me's then the answer to your question would beee," He grinned at you expectantly, as if you were on a game show.

Like he hadn't just threatened to take your head from your neck.

Deciding to engage him, in the hopes it'd buy you more time you gulped back nerves.

"You're an Invincible who was close with a different me?"

"Ding, ding, ding! We have a lady with common sense!"

"But like in what way?"

'There's no way in hell I was dating this guy' you thouht to yourself, unaware of how wrong you were.

"Now there's a question you should've been asked, dude." His casual nature scared you more than a domineering presence could, in instant it could be switched- the blood that stained his hands was proof, his entire demeanor was proof of it actually.

"We were big-time in love, super duper committed to each other where I'm from, "He pointed between your bodies,"You wouldn't see either of us without the other type spiel."

"Whirlwind high school sweethearts who followed each other to college and what was supposed to be onward to the stars," Invincible prattled on, pumping up the dramatics the more he spoke, the back of his hand pressed onto his forehead for effect. "I loved you more then air, then blood and gore, then-"

"What-" Before you could finish, his hand was already moving making you clamp your mouth closed. The soaring punch he landed on the brick wall behind you crushed the structure the impact of his fist leaving a mini crater. Through your peripheral vision you could see multiple crumbles of cement fall and your feet could feel the reverberate just from how powerful his punch was.

This felt like warning number two.

"You should never interrupt anybody when they're talking, it's like really rude." He spoke deathly serious with a pout that rivaled a puppy dog's.

"I'm sorry." You said shaking, the apology's purpose to placate him but he wasn't easily swayed.

"No, you're not."

"I am." You begged, almost believing yourself but you knew he truly didn't.

That flip was switched again and he was grinning once more.

"Nah you know you're not." The intense gaze he bore into you continued, your eyes drifting for a second and he gripped your chin in place, still smiling, "You aren't different from my y/n at all, and she never meant any apology she gave." Releasing your chin he cracked his neck in boredom, eyes shifting up at the darkening sky.

"You know I'm getting the vibe you aren't interested in what I'm saying, and its honestly super hurtful." Gulping you figured that if the option to talk to him was removed the other one he was thinking wasn't pleasant.

"No I care!" You blurted out, Invincible looking at you without belief.

"You sure you want me to finish?" You thrashed your head up and down making him shrug his shoulders, "Alright, man."

"I made a mistake like any person does, "He waved his hand absent-mindedly, "I killed a couple thousand people and then suddenly it was like a ghost town with us, pun intended."

"You abandoned me, told me you'd love me no matter how much blood I had to spill and then shat on those words like it was nothing. Like what we had was nothing." He couldn't keep the bitterness from his tone even if he tried, his eyes downcast for a second in memory."But at least this time we're starting on an honest foot, hotness."

"Honest foot?"

"You think I did all that work of tracking you down for fucking fun?" Invincinble shook his head with a toothy grin, "I mean I kinda did but without me loving you I'd have no motivation, baby."

"But you just said I abandoned you."

"Yeah, that doesn't mean I don't want you."He scoffed, pursing his lips, "Who in love doesn't have problems?"

To you, you were strangers and to him you were his second chance at control.

"I don't even know you're name."

"It's Mark, Markkk,"He sounded out the syllables, slow. "Say Mark, come on you can do it."

"Mark?" You tested it on your tongue with hesitation but He swooned out loud still, unable to resist kissing you.

His lips crashed against yours, all logic being lost in how passionately he kissed you.

It wasn't gentle or slow he threw all of his emotions onto you at once. His movements were hungry and frenzied each twist of his tongue searching for more of your mouth to taste.

You tapped at his chest for a breath but he only held you tighter moaning into your mouth with a desperation that had you tightening your thighs. The print in his suit rubbed against your front in a sinful rhythm, your pussy becoming wetter by the second.

A thin trail of saliva was your only connection when you finally broke apart but he hadn't dropped his arms from the embrace.

"You never could hold out on me for long!" He bit his bottom lip hard with excitement, "Let's give that you're not the same theory a test."

i think this time i'll be through fr....

"You're soooo good," He slurred his words with so much happiness, dick covered in your cream from how fast and hard he was moving.

Your cheek was smushed against the wall he punched and you could barely keep your balance as he fucked you like a toy.

"Pleaseee," You couldn't get your request out as you came once more, body squirming from good you felt.

Straining to watch your fucked out face, you could hear his frustrated tsking.

"You know this position isn't any good for some face time." Mark flipped you with ease, back hitting the wall as he slid easily in practically purring from how slick your pussy felt.

"Muchhh better." His mask was off and you couldn't help but notice how handsome he was. The darkness in his eyes still hadn't left and what scared you was how it was beginng to spur you on.

"Nobody can ever take me like you can," He panted feverishly, fingers gripping your neck to keep control, "Ever."

"You hear that?" your wetness spoke for you but he still forced your jaw open with his thumb, spit on his hand, "I know you heard my question, what I say about being rude?" Your wrapped your legs around his waist tighter as he slammed you up and down his length on repeat.

"I do!" You sobbed walls clenching around his dick, feeling so full. You'd never been fucked with this much intensity and it was overwhelming.

"Who did that?"He forced your neck down, your eyes stuck on how much of your cum covered his girth.

"You did-" You whimpered gasping when he snapped his hips at a different angle.

"I think it was a team effort." He murmured teasingly in your ear before biting it, strokes becoming sloppier. Your hands rested on his shoulders then went up to hold onto something.

Mark twitched inside you from the sensation of your pulling his hair, and you found yourself hoping he'd fill you to brim with cum.

"Pull it some more," Your fingers sunk into the back of his hair, and you tugged but it wasn't enough,"Harder, as hard as you can!"

You felt like you were about to rip his hair out but as his eyes rolled to the back his head and his thrusting grew more hurried you knew he was close.

Sinking his teeth into your neck as he came, nut dripping onto the ground from how much it was he still continued to fuck into you.

You were just getting started.

[rosenclaws]

ma meilleure ennemie || Worst!Logan x Reader

summary: Logan loved, lost, fought, and killed you in his world. Now after being thrust into another universe. He finds you in a world where things worked out. How unfair.

warnings: angst, fem pronouns are used for the reader, its kinda a sad ending but like bittersweet more. talks of fighting and violence

wc: 4.2k

a/n: This is based on the song from Arcane! I would highly recommend watching the show btw its amazing and the scene this song is from is absolutely gorgeous. Anyways I hope y'all enjoy <33

Logan was really sick of all this multiverse stuff. Like seriously.

He barely remembers what happened. Wade had taken another one of this universe hopping devices from the TVA in order to complete some mission but as usual the two got into it. Shouting and fighting until Logan's claws went right into the little device. Before either of them could react it exploded. Logan felt like every atom in his body was being ripped apart and put back together. The world was spinning and he wasn’t quite sure where he was anymore.

In the blink of an eye he's not standing next to wade anymore. He in a bedroom. The light shining through the window and birds chirping outside. Logan looks down and sees that he's no longer in a bloody yellow and blue suit, but simple sweatpants and a black shirt. What the actually fuck. He catches a glimpse of himself in a mirror.

He looks different, just slightly. He had less wrinkles and the bags under his eyes were gone. His hair was a little longer too. It was uncanny as hell. It was him, he was moving his hand and touching his face but it doesn't fully feel like him. He hears laughter outside of his door.

Slowly he opens it, poking his head out to see the hallways bustling with students and teachers. He catches a glimpse of blue fur and he slams the door shut. No no no this isn't real. This is some weird fucked up nightmare dream thing. His heart starts to race as the sights and smells of this odd world start to fuck with his senses. He shuts his eyes and bangs his head against the door. Just wake up already Logan.

Wake. Up.

"You drink too much last night honey?" Logan acts before he can think.

Claws out and slamming whoever had snuck up on him into the door. Logan's eyes widen as he sees you under his arm. Confusion in your eyes as you tug at his arm.

"Fuck! Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." You push him away with your powers but Logan's gaze only hardens.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" He growls. He should bury these deep in your fucking head.

"I live here?" You furrow your brows as you put your hands up.

You take a step forward but Logan takes on back. His defenses are up and he won't make the same mistake this time. You're dangerous, you're the enemy.

"Logan what's gotten into you?" You ask softly. You try again to reach out and touch him but he flinches away.

"Stay away from me." He pushes past you, shoving you into the wall as he rips the door open and runs down the hall. Ignoring the call of his name.

He wanders aimlessly around the mansion until he finds Charles office. If anyone can explain what was happening it's him.

"Ah Logan, I've been waiting for you to arrive, please sit." Hesitantly he sits down, he can't help but observe everything around him.

The last time he was here, at the mansion, was the worst day of his life. But now everyone's laughing and happy. He blinks and the memories flashes in his mind. The blood that stained the walls, the smell of burning, the screams.

"So much pain. I'm so sorry." Charles wheels over to Logan.

"Hey chuck. Been a long time." Logan grumbles. His hands dig into the chair handles, almost tearing them off the more he lets his mind spiral.

"Forgive me for prying, but your thoughts are incredibly loud." Charles pokes and prods Logan's brain. Seeing glimpses of his world and this one mashing together.

"You're not from here." Logan nods his head.

"I don't know how I got here but, I need to get back."

"Start from the beginning." Logan spills it all.

Starting with his own world. How he walked away and it led to everyone being killed. The years of grieving and killing. How he was found and kidnapped by Wade and how it led to him saving the universe. How their fight led to him being thrown into a completely new timeline. Appearing to have taken over the body of this worlds Logan. And you. How you were in his bedroom and the flurry of emotions that came with it.

In Logan's world you were a very powerful mutant with mind powers. You were kind and friendly, but rumbling deep within you was a terrifying power. Power that could level a city with only the snap of your fingers. Charles had taken you in as a child and nursed your abilities. Teaching you the importance of control. You were his prized student. But then Jean came along and Jean became everything you couldn't be. At least that's what you had always told Logan.

She took the spotlight. She got everyone's love an admiration. People weren't scared of her. Her power was graceful and strong while yours was reckless and something to fear. When Logan rolled around you were a professor. He had caught your eye from the moment he was brought in. A handsome, mysterious stranger. But as always it seemed that Jean was the one to grab his attention. Which Logan admits is true, at first. But Jean didn't want him and he respected that.

Logan met you in the middle of the night one day. Small talk turned into more as the sun came up and the two of you were still wrapped up on the couch. You understood him more than anyone and he got you. Your romance may have started slow but it grew into a pillar of Logan's life. He loved you. God he loved you so fucking much. You were his light, his love. You were never a second choice to him, but the right one. The only one that mattered.

But he got to you too late.

All that pain and doubt had been manifesting years before he got there and after one bad mission you exploded. The team had turned on you, told you that it was your fault. It was misplaced anger from everyone. Including him. A shame he carries to this day. Your powers became uncontrollable. If not for Charles and Jean together you could have leveled the entire mansion. Logan tried to console you, to bring you back to him but it was too late. You saw the fear and the hatred growing from those you once considered family.

So you left. The brotherhood got to you before Logan could and the next time he saw you was on the opposite side of battle. You had changed. He barely recognized you anymore. You were cruel and ruthless with your powers.

For years the two of you fought on opposite sides. Logan tried to fight for you. He was convinced the you that he knew was still in there but no one else believed him. They told him over and over that you were gone. That the woman he loved was no more and only a cold blooded villain remained.

You hurt his friends, you threatened the mansion, the kids who once looked up to you now shivered at your name. It hurt him to his core, but eventually he accepted it. His love wasn't enough. Nothing could bring you back. You were gone.

It all cumulated about five years after you left. The brotherhood wanted to use you to wipe out all those who opposed them. Innocent people included. Anyone who stood in their way. The X-Men were sent to stop them. It was a bloody, long, intense fight. Allies and enemies being taken down left and right until it was you and Logan left.

"Please sweetheart, I miss you." Logan begs.

"Come back home."

"That place is not my home anymore." You spit. Nothing but hatred in your eyes as you pushed Logan to the ground. Your powers keeping him from moving.

"I'm going to kill you and all your friends. Nothing is going to stand in our way. Nothing!" Your powers let him go but you grab him by the neck.

For a split second Logan thought he saw regret in your eyes. Something. Anything other than the empty soullessness from before.

Logan! Take it! He hears Jean speak in his mind.

She was nursing Scotts wounds, she could barely stand on her own. With a broken roar he digs his claws right into you. He watches as the light drains from your eyes. As the blood pours from the wounds he gave you. He holds you in his arms. Silently whispering that he loves you, that he's sorry.

Your body goes limp and when Logan can no longer hear your heartbeat he knows that you're truly gone.

Why you let go of Logan he'll never know. You had to have known what the risk was. Why would you ever give him free use of his hands, of his claws? A part of him wonders if this is what you wanted.

Your death took a heavy toll on him. He started drinking more and more. The conflicted feelings weighed heavily on him. Most would celebrate your death but he mourned you every damn day. Mourned the woman you were, the woman that you loved.

"What is she doing here?" Logan asks lowly. Memories of his version of you flashing through his head.

"Here she never lost control, never joined the brotherhood.

"What changed?"

"In this world, Jean came to me first. She was my student first and thus Jean helped me train her to control her powers. She was my star student. Never feared her powers." Logan scoffs.

Was that all it took? Was that little difference all it took to save you? If he had loved you enough could he have saved you? Or were you already too far gone by then.

"We'll work on getting you home. I'll talk to hank and get back to you. For now, just try your best to adjust." Logan is dismissed.

Now what? Maybe he should just hole himself in his room until its time to go home. Until he remembers that you're there too. Suddenly he hears kids screaming, his senses kicking into high gear as he runs outside, claws out on instinct. He sees you with a bunch of kids running around screaming. He doesn't have time to think. He just acts.

"Get away from them!" Logan yells. Making everyone stop in their tracks. He lunges at you and you use your powers to slam him to the ground.

"What the fuck is your problem! We were playing a game!" You shout.

"Kids, go back inside." You command and they slowly file inside, whispering amongst themselves.

"How was I supposed to know that?" Logan growls once you let him back up.

He puts his claws away but the hostility doesn't fade. How could it? His brain is so fucked up right now, he had long accepted that you were gone and now he's thrown into a world where you aren't a villain anymore. That you're the woman he loves again but he just can't let himself trust this. He can't. What if Charles is wrong? He just...he can't do this.

"What did you think? Did you actually think I was going to hurt them?!" You ask mostly as a joke.

"Logan, you've been off since this morning." You reach your hand out but he doesn't take it. He pushes himself up. Putting up these walls that you swore you broke a long time ago.

"I think its best if you stay the hell away from me." He walks away without another word.

Leaving you utterly confused.

Logan locks himself away for the next couple days. Only coming out when he was called by Hank and Charles. He could feel your eyes on him every time. Like a sad puppy he kicked to the curb. He doesn't even look at you. He knows he can't. If he does he'll cave. The problem is that Logan knows he can't stay here. He's only setting himself up for heartbreak if he lets you in. Nothing but pain and what could have been. He just doesn't think he can mourn you anymore. He just wants to go home. To forget this ever happened.

Once again he can't sleep, deciding to walk around the mansion instead. Pictures line the walls, some that he recognizes and others he doesn't. He stops and one in particular. Jean and Scotts wedding. Scott looks happy and Jean is a beautiful bride, but that's not what catches his eye.

It's you standing right beside her. A big smile on your face. You look gorgeous. So happy and carefree.

"I remember that day," He jumps hearing your voice once again. He turns to see you standing away from him, but staring at the picture. His claws don't come out this time at least.

"Can't believe Scott even wanted you as one of his groomsmen with how much shit you give him." You say softly.

"Yeah," Logan looks over to the other side of the photo. Seeing himself dressed in a suit. Except Logan's eyes are on you.

"Charles told me. About your situation. I understand why you reacted the way you did. I'd be freaked out too." You rub your arm awkwardly.

"How much did he tell you." He asks.

"Not much. Just that you're from another timeline and you're trying to get back." Logan grunts.

"That...you've been through a lot of pain and loss." Logan's breath hitches. So Charles didn't tell you any specifics. Maybe that's for the best.

"I don't know...what we are in your world. But I want you to know that I'm here for you Logan." He clenches his fits, god how can you be so sweet to him after he almost stabbed you twice. He'll never understand.

"Thanks. I'm sorry If I scared you before." He says.

"You can never scare me." You say and Logan shuts his eyes.

You used to say that to each other. Logan was made to be a weapon and you were a ticking time bomb. Yet not once were you ever afraid of each other. Both of you looking past what others saw.

"What...what am I? To you?" You ask hesitantly.

The question's been eating you alive since you learned about this whole thing. Logan takes a deep breath. Turning to look at you and feeling his heart sink down to his feet.

"It's a long story, one you don't want to hear." He says with a sigh.

"I mean, I have time. I just. I don't want you to have to carry it all alone." You reach up and touch his arm. Logan's eyes close as he feels your fingers trail down to his hand, lacing your fingers with his. It's been so long since he's held your hand.

"Maybe another time sweetheart." Logan squeezes your hand, using all his willpower to let go of your hand.

You watch sadly as Logan walks away, disappearing back into his room without another word.

He lays on the bed staring at the ceiling nursing a glass of whiskey. It's been a week since he got here. They're close to getting him home. There's muffled music coming from the living room.

It's Storms birthday. Logan should be out there, maybe to keep up appearances but a party is the last thing he wants to be at right now. There's a knock at the door and he ignores it. Until another one, and another. Finally he just gets up to tell them to fuck off. He opens the door to see Charles.

"I said no." He mumbles. Ready to slam the door but Charles stops him.

"I'm not here for that. We should be ready to send you home within the hour. That being said. I know it's been a long time since you saw most of us. Consider saying goodbye this time." With that Charles leaves, leaving Logan stunned.

Quietly he grabs his jacket and heads to the party. Sneaking in as best as he can. Sticking to the corner of the room. He sees Storm talking to Jean and Scott. They're smiling and laughing. Jean spots Logan from across the room. Offering him a small smile.

His eyes move over to the middle of the room. They had pushed the furniture around to make room for a dance floor. He watches as He's not strong enough for this? Rogue, Kitty, and Bobby were dancing. Laughing as they take turns making up stupid dance moves. Jubilee was using her powers to create fireworks that lit up the whole room.

She catches Logan's gaze and waves happily. Seeing everyone again, seeing them happy and thriving. It made his heart ache. To know that at least in one universe, everyone is okay. No thanks to him that is.

"Logan! Come dance!" Jubilee shouts, making everyone's eyes turn to him.

"No thanks kid, I don't do that." He grumbles.

"Oh come on Logan, it's a party." She begs.

Logan sighs and pushes himself off the wall. Walking to the dance floor taking Jubilees hand and spinning her around a little bit. A small smile crossing his face.

He remembers Jubliee asking him to dance once. Back in his timeline. She was a kid. There was this school dance and she wanted to go so badly. He took her hands and she stepped on his toes. He made her swore up and down to never speak of it but he remembers it fondly.

"Mind if I cut in?" He turns to see you standing there. You're all dressed up looking so pretty. Jubliee bows out, wiggling her eyebrows making Logan roll his eyes.

"Hi." You say softly as Logan holds out his hand.

"Hi." He says.

You and Logan move in sync. Like nothing had happened as the two of you move to the music. Logan smiles as he twirls you around and dips you. He lets go of the weight on his shoulders. Letting himself just exist for once. To enjoy holding you in his arms and dancing to the music. He'll face reality when he goes back. But tonight, he'll dance.

When the music lets up he drags you outside away from the noise and the prying eyes. You walk through the garden in a nice quiet. He leans down and picks a flower from the ground, putting it behind your year.

"Pretty." You bite your lip as you tug your coat tighter.

You sit on a bench and Logan joins you. From this angle you can see how lively the mansion is tonight. The party, the lights on in the bedrooms. Its so homey. Logan smiles, a part of his heart feels like it's patching itself up. At least its not all bad in every universe right?

"You go back tonight right?" You ask and Logan nods.

"Are you happy to go back?" Logan looks over at you, grabbing your hand and squeezing it tightly.

"I uh, I don't know." The truth is he wants to stay.

God he wants to stay so badly. To live here and be happy. No worries about the world ending or being reminded of his dead friends. But...He can't stay. As badly as he wants to this isn't his life. You aren't his girlfriend.

As he was told before. All the pain he went through made him the man he is now, there are people out there who still need him. Who need the Wolverine to fight for them. You lean your head on his shoulder.

"I wish I could stop time. Just for a second." He mumbles.

His arm wrapping around your shoulder as he watches them sing happy birthday. You lift your head, staring into his eyes. What sad lonely eyes they are. He leans in, foreheads touching as he cups your face gently.

"Can we, can we just pretend like it's the first time?" He asks in a low whisper.

You nod your head as you close your eyes and let his lips touch yours. The kiss means fucking everything to Logan. His thumb brushes your cheek as he kisses you with ever ounce of love he still has deep in his heart. He knows that you aren't the same woman but fuck he just hopes you know that he's sorry that he wasn't enough. He hopes you know that he loves you.

You tug on his hair and Logan groans. His other hand resting on your back pulling you closer. He reluctantly pulls apart from you. Breathing heavily as he catches his breath. There's this silly smile on your face, one that always appeared after Logan kissed you no matter how much you tried to hide it. He missed it.

Logan. It's time.

He hears Charles in his head. His smile dropping as he realizes it's time to go. "I can go with you down to the lab." You offer as Logan stands up. He takes your hand and helps you up, leaning in to kiss your forehead gently.

"No, I should do this on my own." The truth is he knows that if you're down there he won't be able to go through that damn portal.

"Don't look so sad, You'll have your Logan back soon sweetheart." He wipes away a stray tear from your face.

"I know. It's just, hard to say goodbye." You take the flower from your hair and place it in his jacket pocket.

"Something to remember me by." You walk hand in hand back into the living room.

Logan takes one last look around the room. A strange sense of peace coming over him as everyone smiles and waves to him. It's not goodbye for them, but it is for him. But at least this time, he got to say the words. Logan lets go of your hand, sparing you one last look as he steps into the elevator. He can't bring himself to say anything. You know what he wants to say.

The elevator moves slowly as he heads down to the lab. Silently he steps out and heads towards the lab.

"Logan wait!" He freezes as he hears your voice.

"How did you-"

"The stairs. I took the stairs." You blurt out. He nods, standing there unsure of what to say.

"Can I ask you one question before you go?" You ask breathlessly. He nods. He can hear something happening in the lab, he doesn't have much time.

"In your universe, did you love me? Were we happy?" Maybe its an odd question. After all you just made out outside. But you don't know what this Logan had been through, if things were different or how different they were. You just needed to know. You always had a hunch your love was stronger than a simple timeline.

Logan takes a long look at you. Committing you to memory, so that now he can remember you like this. Smiling and happy and unafraid of who you are.

"I loved you more than anything sweetheart, I still do." With a soft smile you take one last look at Logan before returning back up the stairs. When Logan returns he'll be the man you knew before, but you don't think you'll ever forget this other Logan. Not for a long time.

"You ready Logan?" Hank asks as he hooks Logan up to a machine.

This was supposed to separate the two Logan's. He just prays it doesn't kill him. Logan closes his eyes. Similar to the feeling before he grunts as his cells seem to tear apart once again. Only this time when the pain stops he's back in his bloody suit. The other Logan is laying on the ground. Knocked out from whatever the hell Hank managed to do.

Before their very eyes an orange portal appears. They must have finally pinpointed the anomaly once the two had been separated. Before he steps through he turns around, nodding his head at Hank and then Charles.

"It was good to see you again Chuck, Thanks for everything." Logan says.

It feels like a weight has been lifted off his chest as he steps through the orange portal. In a flash he's at the TVA headquarters, standing in front of Wade.

"Peanut! There you are, oh I was worried sick." Wade jumps into his arms and Logan just drops him. Wade stands up and dusts himself off.

"We need to get you chipped or something. Maybe a bell to wear around your neck." Logan rolls his eyes and just follows the TVA agent in front of them.

"I went to a world where dogs could talk. What about you?" Wade asks as they're brought back home. Logan thinks for a moment. He sticks his hand in the pocket of his suit. His body freezing as he feels the soft petals of a flower.

"Hello? Earth to Wolvie? What having some emotional flashback to something only the readers know about?" Wade waves his hand in front of Logans face.

"I was thinking asshole." Logan shoves his hand away. Smiling as he tucks the flower deep in his pocket, deciding that he'll keep his adventure to himself for now.

"Anything you want to share with the class?" Wade asks. Logan just shakes his head.

"No, nothing worth mentioning."

[lobotomyhusband]

Hey, I normally don’t do this, but your recent post about time really struck me. Because god have I been there. And it’s not talked about enough. I hate hearing “time doesn’t exist” from those who already had what I wanted. It’s frustrating! And you are completely valid for feeling it. This isn’t to say “it’ll all be worth it” or “once u shift you’ll live a thousand lives so what does this little blip matter?” Hate that. Because what you’re feeling right now DOES matter! And if you haven’t shifted yet, it’s hard to have this multiversal perspective that this reality is nothing in the grand scheme of it all.

I digress, I’m not here just to complain in solidarity. I’m here to give some tips that personally helped me working with loa while being terribly impatient and scared of time. This isn’t to say these tips have solved all my problems, sometimes I still worry, but it’s quieter now.

Loa is all about YOUR assumptions. You don’t have to listen to anyone else, listen to what feels right to you. Doubts and break downs don’t have to mean anything if you don’t give them meaning. And, as long as you return to the new story afterwards, it is okay! Speaking of the new story, I am “I’m in my dr” biggest hater. When I affirm that I immediately am hit with resistance and doubts and fear. If that’s the case for you, you are not broken for it. You are human. What worked for me was finding affirmations that don’t make my brain explode. For example, I have had success with lucid dreams in the past. So “I lucid dream every time I sleep” became my new affirmation. Occasionally added by “I shift through lucid dreams” or something like it. Now- not only have I had a lucid dream almost every night since affirming, I’ve gotten a chance to shift with each one. It worked bc my brain was already loosened up to the idea of lucid dreaming. It made sense to me. And I had minimal resistance to it. Minimal resistance = I’m calmer, more confident. Less stressed of time bc I know through persistence it has to happen.

If lucid dreaming or other things don’t feel right in your brain that’s okay. Start small. “I am capable of shifting.” “I am someone who shifts easily.” Or something along those lines. And persist in that new assumption. It might be easier for your brain to consider, to take in, and then integrate as its new identity. And once it’s there, it has to reflect in the 3d. Because through repetition, your brain starts to expect it to.

TLDR: it’s okay not to jump straight to the end in affirmations. Find affirmations that make you feel good, that make moving past occasional doubts easier. You don’t have to force yourself into what everyone else preaches is the “right way” for loa. I think, and this has worked for me, that working with your emotions instead of constantly fighting against them is what helps the most. You got this! Dont give up, and I hope this can help you in the ways it’s helped me :)

thank you🪷.

[wimpycore]

🔷Gojo Satoru: Infinity, Calculus, and the Man Who Made Reality Lag

🧠 WHO IS GOJO?

Gojo Satoru is the strongest sorcerer alive — and not because he lifts the most weight.He inherited the Six Eyes and the Limitless Technique from the Gojo Clan. And those two things together? That's like having God's calculator... and using it to manipulate reality itself.---

🔵 WHAT IS LIMITLESS?

It’s his clan’s inherited technique, and it’s all about one word:

✅ INFINITY.

But not in the "space goes on forever" way. More like: You try to touch him... and you never actually do.

Imagine you're trying to touch his hand.Now imagine there's a gap between your hand and his. And as you move closer, that gap keeps splitting in half. Again. And again. Forever.

That’s called a “Zeno’s Paradox.”➗ Real-Life Math:In calculus, when you divide a distance forever — like 1 → ½ → ¼ → ⅛ → 1/16...The distance gets infinitely small, but never becomes zero.

That’s the idea of a convergent infinite series — it approaches a number, but never reaches it.

So Gojo uses that logic IRL.He slows down everything that tries to touch him…by stretching the space between atoms using cursed energy math.

🧮 Basically:Infinity exists between two things. Gojo controls that invisible space.

So when you throw a punch? It slows to zero velocity right before impact.

> “You’re not stopped. You’re just moving through infinity.”---

🔴 GOJO'S TECHNIQUES — THE TRINITY OF LIMITLESS

1. Cursed Technique Lapse: Blue

"Gravity with an attitude. "Blue creates a vacuum — it pulls everything toward a point in space. It’s like Gojo says, “Hey reality, subtract some space here,” and it does.

The result? Buildings collapse, people get yeeted, space warps.

💥 IRL comparison: Like a black hole — small point, infinite pull.---

2. Cursed Technique Reversal: Red

"The universe says no. "Red is the opposite. Instead of pulling, it pushes. Violently.Gojo pumps reverse cursed energy into Limitless — and it multiplies instead of subtracts.

Red repels everything in its path like a cannonball made of “get away from me.”

🔥 IRL comparison: Like explosive force or rapid expansion — kinda like the Big Bang.--

3. Hollow Purple> "Blue + Red = Delete button."Combines Blue (pull) + Red (push).Normally, opposing forces cancel each other out…But with Gojo? They collide, fold space, and erase everything in their path.

🟣 What’s left? Nothing. It doesn’t explode, it just ceases to exist.

💀 Think: You weren’t destroyed. You were subtracted from reality.---

🧿 SIX EYES — THE BRAIN UPGRADE

Only Gojo has this. It’s like having the most overpowered calculator in the multiverse.

Helps him:

See cursed energy in extreme detail

Calculate infinite techniques in real-time

Spend near-zero cursed energy — perfect efficiencyIt’s not just eyes. It’s a CPU upgrade to his brain.

🧠 Basically, he’s running Jujutsu on quantum math mode 24/7.While you’re still doing 2 + 2 on your fingers.---

💥 DOMAIN EXPANSION — INFINITE VOID

“I will fill your brain with so much information… it forgets how to blink.”

Gojo’s domain doesn’t damage your body — it crashes your consciousness.Inside his Domain, your brain receives infinite information at once.

You can’t move. You can’t think. You just exist in paralysis.

🧬 Think: sensory overload cranked up to cosmic horror.

You’re not dead — you’re just stuck in omniscient terror.---

⚖️ IS INFINITY ACCURATE IN REAL MATH?YUP.His version of Zeno’s Paradox is textbook calculus.Real-world concept:> ∑(1/2ⁿ) from n=1 to ∞ = 1But it never actually reaches 1 — it just gets infinitely close.Gojo weaponizes this concept by expanding the space between you and him infinitely — you get closer, but you never arrive.That’s not fantasy. That’s legit convergent series math used in physics, too.

[angel-of-the-moons]

Reversal

Miguel O'Hara x Fem!Reader

TW/CW: NSFW, Smut, Sex, Sex toys, Top(?) Reader, Bottom(?) Miguel, Reader being Nasty, Size Kink, Height Difference, Overstimulation (almost), Edging(?), Canon event: Miguel likes it up the ass from time to time

MINORS DNI: I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

A/N: Blame thank @oharaludes for this (Also I lied I should be asleep but I stayed up to write this now instead of tomorrow because akhdlhslhflhohofnsondlndlnc I couldn't afford to lose the spark™)

(Any Spanish spoken is in italics and is largely translated by Google. Header does not indicate reader's race. I really need to get more creative at making these asdfghjkl)

🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷

Miguel O'Hara was a man who had to be in control at all times. He had to oversee who went on what mission, who to let into the Society, who to hunt down, what universes to monitor, which anomalies threatened the safety of the multiverse...

He was not known for willingly relinquishing his control.

But, being in control all the time, bearing all that weight had limitations. Sometimes, it just became too much and you would need to let it go for a bit, get the weight off your back and relax.

But then... Miguel had you.

You were probably the only respite Miguel had in the multiverse. And you were right under his nose the entire time. He convinced himself to go back to his universe, to visit his brother. He missed him.

But... he went back...

Just to find you. You were spunky, playful, and annoyingly gorgeous. And you happened to be one of Gabriel's newest best friends.

Poor Gabriel had a heart attack when he swung by your apartment to drop off the computer he was fixing for you, just to walk in and see you and Miguel on the couch in a rather compromising position.

You told Miguel you swore that his brother's brain exploded when he almost fainted.

But hey! Your computer worked again!

Not too long after, you decided to make it official. Official as in "he told you everything" official.

Gabriel just made you two swear you'd lock your front door next time.

Right now however, the nostalgia of that day lost its novelty as exhaustion and frustration crept into his body as he dragged his feet into your apartment, unlocking the door with your security code and letting himself in.

There you were. Gorgeous as the day he first saw you

One of his shirts hung off your shoulder, and down past your thighs. He couldn't resist the smile that snaked its way onto his face when he smelled you.

"Ah, Miguel! How is your universe saving thingy going, amor?" You said, flinging your arms around him as he gripped you tight, burying his nose in your hair to inhale the soft scent of you.

Coffee, chocolate, and strawberries. That's what you always smelled like.

"Exhausting." He sighed loosing his grip on you just enough to look down at you. You were so goddamn short.

It was cute, honestly.

You frowned up at him, those gorgeous lips of yours quirking down. "Ven y siéntate?"

Miguel let you pull him by the hand to the couch, where you sat down first and patted your lap.

Miguel smiled again as he accepted your silent request, lying on your couch (though mostly curled up due to his sheer size alone) and laid his head in your lap.

Your fingers dove into the soft chocolate locks on his head, massaging his scalp with your nails and he made a soft groan of contentment at the sensation.

"Now, tell me about it?" You hummed.

"Later... right now I want to relax. Olvida todas esas cosas." He mumbled softly, closing his eyes, his thumb caressing your knee softly.

"Just want to relax." He repeated, turning his face into the plus of your thighs.

He could smell you. And he knew that you knew it.

And you were never one for subtlety.

But you were one for playing coy when it suited you.

"Aw... Miggy." You purr, combing through his hair softly. "You really do need to relax, honey."

"I can think of a way." He growled, turning his head again, so he can place a kiss to the top of your thigh, making you giggle.

"Nuh-uh. How about we switch things up today, hm?" You grin.

He looked up at you.

"¿Qué quieres decir?"

🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷

He should have known.

Of course.

Of course you were waiting for the right moment to breach this subject.

And of course you knew he'd say yes, he almost always said yes to you.

It was... odd. Not unpleasant. But odd. Normally he tops in bed, pinning you down, biting marks into your skin, sucking hickeys here and there as he pounded you into the mattress until your eyes crossed and you were a babbling incoherent mess.

And of course, you also had everything planned out.

Because when you had a plan, you had all your bases covered.

Like right now.

Somehow, you talked him into letting you top him for the night. Taking control from him and just helping him enjoy it. And you assured him he would.

You anticipated the holes he'd tear into your bed with his talons, the curses he'd spit...

What you weren't expecting though, was the soft whimpers and deep groans coming from him. How absolutely pliant he became while you fucked him with the strap-on you had secured to your waist.

You would continue to apply more lube as you fucked him here and there, stopping to grip his hips for stability, the pillow under him helping keep him angled for you.

You half wanted to have him get on all fours so you could fuck him that way, but it would ruin the other part of your plan.

"So good for me." You purr, running your fingers up his abs, tracing the small scars he's picked up over the years.

You jerked your hips upwards, not hitting his prostate but enough to make his eyes roll and him snarl through hissed teeth.

When he cursed, he wanted it to come out harsher. He meant for it to sound more... authoritative.

But all that came out was a whiny, breathy gasp.

"¡Mierda!"

You giggled, and stilled your hips just a moment to grab the bottle of lube, squirting some onto your hand as you wrapped around his throbbing length.

Not that you ever needed to use lube when you jerked him off, the man leaked so much precum that he could just use it on its own.

But, you liked the lewd sounds it helped make when you drag your fist up and down his cock.

He was so big you could barely wrap your hand around him.

You dragged your hand up his shaft slowly, leisurely tracing each vein as you rolled your hips in a consistent pace, not quite giving him the relief he wanted, but edging him just enough that he slowly just became undone under you, like you had so many times under him.

"Awww, cariño..." You tut, jerking him slowly, twisting your hand as you went to the angry and weeping head of his cock, rubbing your thumb over the slit and applying a bit of pressure there.

"Tell me what you want, baby." You grin, giving another sharp thrust, sending a sharp bolt of pleasure up his spine that hit him so hard he audibly gasped and you could hear it as his talons shredded your bedsheets.

"¡Mierda!" He groaned, the noise deep and rumbling and oh so needy that the very sound sent a fresh wave of heat straight to your cunt.

"Use your words, honey." You hum, arching your hips again as his thighs flexed, the muscles taut as he let out a shaky exhale, one arm going to drape over his face.

You clicked your tongue and reached up, swatting his arm aside so you could see that gorgeous face of his.

"Let me see you, mi amor." You say to him, making one long stroke, followed by a few short, hard ones, making him cry out again.

"Again, use your words, baby. What d'you want?"

"Fucking--" He growled. "I want to cum! Mierda I want to--"

You frowned again and let his cock go, slowing your pace to an agonizing crawl.

"Miguel..." You scold.

"P-Por favor." He whined, tipping his head back so you could see his Adams apple bob as he swallowed.

"Thaaaaat's it. I have something for you..." You say, reaching for the small velvet bag that rolled to your knee thanks to the weight dipping the bed.

He looked up at you, his pupils blown wide and his irises glowing a gorgeous crimson as you pulled out a small vibrator.

You smirked with satisfaction when you saw his cock jump, a new bead of precum dripping down onto his abs, adding to the rivulets that flowed down his sides already.

You turned it on and it buzzed to life in your hand, surprisingly loud for such a tiny thing. But damn, did you get your money's worth. You turned it off again and pressed it at the base of his cock, where the shaft met his taut and heavy balls.

"All right, since you asked nicely, I'll allow it."

The moment you turned it back on he dropped his head back with a sound that you swore would shred any other man's vocal chords, especially when you started thrusting where you knew he so desperately wanted it.

You grinned and bit your lip, thrusting up and hard, guiding the toy up and down his bobbing length, not giving him any relief.

You could tell by how tense his abs were and how desperately his hands pawed at your bedsheets that he was close.

"Go on and cum for me, cariño." You purr seductively; you punctuated every word with a thrust.

"Just." Smack!

"Like." Smack!

"This." Smack!

You dragged the small vibrator up to the tip of his cock, and thrust hard one last time, as he practically bellowed out your name as he came, hot ropes shooting out of his dick and coating his abs, parts of his chest, and completely coating the head of the vibrator.

You giggle and switch it off, and pull the strap out of him slowly, amused at how badly he was twitching for you.

"My idea was a good one, huh?" You say smugly.

Without looking at you, he sticks up his index finger.

"This time." He said, his eyes still closed as he came down from his high, his belly painted white.

"Pff. Hey, hey Miguel. Miguel. Hey. Heyyy!" You giggle, looking down at him, tapping his thigh to get him to answer you.

When Miguel finally looked at you, he had a soft scowl on his face, which immediately melted away when he watched you wrap your lips around the head of that damned toy, and lick every bit of his cum off the tip, making direct eye contact the whole time, humming like you were simply sucking on a piece of candy.

"¡Mierda!"

You shrieked and giggled when he pinned you down, spreading your legs with his thighs as he bit down on your shoulder, growling.

"My turn now, chica."

[yawnderu]

Parenthood — Miguel O'Hara x Reader

I love putting this man in situations.

Content: You kidnap a wombat and force Miguel to play house with you.

fluff, idiots in love, mutual pining.

"You brought a living wombat into my office." Miguel notes bluntly, staring at you dead in the eyes with an unreadable expression as his slow-moving platform lowers.

"I wanted you to see it." You retort, shooting him a playful smile as you put the heavy creature on the floor, trying not to cringe at the pain on your back from carrying it. You crouch down next to it, petting it like it was a domestic pet, and it lets you.

"You could have sent a picture." Miguel sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose as he mutters in Spanish, not knowing what to make of the situation. Why was it always up to him to handle all this nonsense? He deals with timelines and the multiverse, what the hell does he know about wombats?

"Why on earth did you think you should bring this to my office?" He asks, jumping down from the platform and staring down at you and the not-so-tiny creature, hands on his hips.

"He was so miserable at the zoo! Now he's smiling and laughing— well, not really, but you get what I mean. He looks happier." You retort, looking up at Miguel to give him a sheepish grin.

"You're telling me you kidnapped a wombat just for this?" He looks between you and the wombat, who is now chasing you around. He's... both impressed and amused now. Impressed because you actually managed to do something like that, and amused because you would do something like that.

"What's his name?" He internally punches himself for falling for the bait. He knows he should have sent you away, maybe even have you arrested for stealing a zoo animal, but... you kidnapped the animal to show it to him, and it's playing with you, looking happy. It's... kind of endearing.

"I was thinking about naming him Miguel O'Hara." You answer teasingly as you lay down on the floor of his office, allowing the wombat to climb on top of you as your hands cover your face, feeling its tiny and gentle scratches on them.

"No— that's my name." Miguel says. This is adorable in the most unhinged sort of way, and he can't help but ignore the way the corners of his mouth tilt up slightly.

"Fine, then he'll be... Miggy." You poke your tongue out at him, sitting up as the wombat stays on your lap, being surprisingly calm. You made him tired by running around and letting it chase you.

"You call me that." He answered with a raised eyebrow, glancing between the wombat and you. He can feel his brain leaking out of his ears.

"Are you too selfish to share a nickname with a wombat?" You grin up at him, enjoying teasing him, just like every single time you're together. His reactions are the best, and he's so funny without even realizing, like a grumpy cat.

Miguel simply rolls his eyes, walking over and crouching down in front of you. He stares at you dead in the eye before disengaging his suit on his hand, reaching down to gently pet the wombat. His hands easily dwarfing the head of the animal, yet he's surprisingly gentle.

"Tell you what— this is my child, I'm its mother, and you'll be the father." Yes, you're trying to play house with the damn animal and Miguel. No, Miguel will not stop you, despite the way he rolls his eyes.

"I didn't sign up for this." He replies, yet he keeps petting the animal, scratching behind its ear. This girl could probably kidnap an entire herd of these if she so pleased... and he'd probably join in on it.

"You're insane." He tells her casually, though his words lack the usual bite they carry. "Actually insane." He loves her.

"You still have a huge crush on me, though." You retort teasingly, ignoring the way he's blankly staring at you, burning a hole through your head. He's probably making your head explode in his imagination.

"I don't." Miguel is a horrible liar and he knows it, yet that doesn't mean he won't defend himself against your horrible— but true accusations.

"You totally do." Your smug tone only makes things worse, forcing Miguel to try his best not to roll his eyes so far he could see his own brain. He simply sighs, ignoring you as he starts petting the wombat's tummy.

"Don't speak when I'm petting the baby. Cállate." It seems Miguel is getting a chance at parenthood with you, even when the "baby" is a 30kg marsupial. The thought of it makes the corners of his mouth slightly tilt up, looking down at the animal to hide it, yet you can still see it. The image of it puts a smile on your own face, yet this time, you keep quiet about it.