10 Things I wish I knew before I became a philosopher
Hello and welcome back to philosophy tok!
Since I’ve gained a lot of subscribers recently. Probably because a whole bunch of my colleagues of the more recent centuries have been canceled for oversharing some shady opinions in the ethics & morality department.
For those of you who are new here, welcome, I’m Socrates, I’m an ancient philosopher and today i thought i’d give you a few 10 tips for the newbie philosopher that I wished I had known sooner:
The first is: Mastering the Art of the Selfie: Socrates might have enjoyed capturing his deep thoughts in a perfectly-filtered selfie. A solid selfie game is essential for a philosopher in the 21st century.
And start practicing when you’re still young! Take a lot of them and make sure you exude an air of wisdom and confidence, but remember to smile. I didn’t do this when I was still young and sexy unfortunately, and now there’s probably thousands of busts of my old haggard face placed in university lecture theaters and houses of parliament all around the world.
So on the off chance that you become famous for your ramblings and are taught in universities around the world someday, make sure that the professors have plenty of pictures to choose from that are more flattering than this abomination!
"The Art of Subtweeting."
In this age of written words, remember to engage in debates with finesse. Never name names, but deliver your philosophical shade with eloquence and subtlety. If you’re gonna be a hater, never address the individual directly, but also be specific enough to make sure that the person you’re talking about knows exactly who they are!
Now, let's talk about tip number three:
"Online Philosophy Courses."
Now you know, that I am a big fan of meeting and thinking in groups, especially perambulating over the agora. But sometimes, I just can’t deal with the ruthless mediterranean sun, that’s when online courses come in handy. I can keep my brain active, while keeping my body cool and comfortable in my stoa. Shameless plug here. If you want to join my online courses, you can do so on my Website: Soc’ssuperssassysocraticsesh.com
My two most popular courses are still
Plato vs. Socrates - Spilling the Hemlock Tea
Hot Takes and High stakes with Socrates
You’ll find the link in my Bio.
Tip number four is related to tip 3: You’ve got to know how to organize an effective symposium over zoom. The world has grown beyond Greek Horizons my friend, and we want to engage in musings with our international friends. Zoom can be very helpful, even though it can be frustrating to argue with someone who refuses to turn on their camera as they diss your theses and theorems, humiliating you in front of everyone. Cowardly, but unfortunately, far too common these days.
