I'm curious, what's your opinion on Shiny Breeding?
I think it’s absolutely hilarious.
Okay so there was this one kid named...ah shit i forget let’s call him Piss-For-Brains. So old Pissy’s daddy ran a breeding center and Pissy Sr. wanted to give his bastard, urine soaked offspring a shiny Chimchar for his thirteenth birthday. So he acquires some apes from Sinnoh and through a process I don’t care to consider, he managed to get some thirty or so Chimchar eggs before Pissy got his pastel monkey.
So Piss-For-Brains is all proud and shit that he got his red pastel monkey and challenges my Chimchar (who I found eating Styrofoam behind a power plant one day after school) to a fight. Because, as I think we’ve established, Pissy had piss for brains.
So this young, freshly hatched Chimchar comes out and within about eighteen seconds, Blitz has mounted this sickly little freak’s head and started raining punches down like he’s Rhonda freaking Rousey or some shit. Pissy is screaming for his red monkey to do something but Blitz picks Shiny up, spins him around, and plants him on his stupid head in the middle of the pitch. K.O.
So now Pissy is crying about how I cheated and in a fit of impotent rage he hucks a juice box or some shit at Blitz’s head. Which turned out to be a mistake because within seconds, Pissy was trying to fight an enraged redneck monkey singlehandedly.
And then the parents came...one or two lawsuits may have been threatened...long story short, that’s when my parents decided I needed to go on a Pokemon journey.
So where was I...oh yeah; shiny Pokemon are mutants and breeders must be into bestiality.