Prompt: Nervous (Jegulus microfic)
@jeggyverses-jegulus-microfic
Word Count: 1471
CW: jokes about death and murder, joking use of derogatory terms
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Tap tap tap.
A quiet but steady rhythm filled the room as Regulus’ foot bounced against the floor.
“You’re nervous,” Sirius remarked with a smile he tried to hide.
Regulus turned his head away from his mirror to shoot him a dirty look.
Sirius raised his arms in innocence. “I wasn’t criticizing you! I’m just saying, it’s sweet you’re so nervous.”
“Get off my bed,” Regulus replied. He ran his fingers through his hair for the hundredth time in an attempt to fix the way his curls lay. Somehow, no matter how much time, care, or product he used styling his hair, it never looked as good as his brother’s, despite the older boy claiming he did nothing but let his hair air dry.
Ignored his brother’s complaint, Sirius rustled through the rings and necklaces in his jewelry box. “These silver rings would go well with your outfit.”
“Can you find my choker necklace? The black one with the stars,” Regulus replied without taking his eyes off of his reflection.
“The one with emeralds?”
“No.”
“This velvet one?”
“No.”
Giving up on his hair with a sigh, Regulus moved his fingers to his top. His dark green shirt was collarless and slightly billowy with a tie-front. The problem was how low he should tie it.
“Why do you have so many black necklaces with stars?” Sirius grumbled as he opened a few more drawers. “Oh my god, did you buy them for yourself because they reminded you of your name, you narcissist?”
“My friends got me most of them, actually. It’s an inside joke,” Regulus replied. “I know you won’t understand it, since you don’t have any friends, at least not any with enough money to buy you jewelry.”
“Shut up, you bastard. Ooh!” Sirius exclaimed. “You have to wear these earrings.” Regulus hummed, too focused on his top to go examine the earrings.
At the lack of response, Sirius huffed. “Oi, come here, I’ll tie your shirt for you.”
“No.”
“We both know you’re going to show your collarbones like the harlot that you are, but you don’t actually want to bare your entire chest since you don’t have muscles. I can tie it.”
Regulus rolled his eyes but gave in, letting his brother tie the top while he put on the earrings and rings Sirius had selected.
Sirius nodded at his handiwork.
“Ok, you look less like a corpse,” he declared magnanimously.
Regulus hit him with a pillow.
“Are you sure this guy is worth all this effort? It’s only your first date, right?”
“Yeah, our first real date, but we’ve hung out before.”
“Ew, slut,” Sirius coughed.
Regulus swatted him again.
“Besides, I…” He trailed off with a blush.
“Aww, you like him!” Sirius grinned.
“Shut up.”
“You’re so cute!” Sirius bounced on his brother’s bed. “So, what’s he like?”
“I’m not telling you.”
“C’mon, I’ll fix your eyeliner while you tell me.”
“What’s wrong with my eyeliner?” Regulus asked in a panicked voice.
Sirius laughed. “Don’t worry, baby brother, I’ll fix you right up.”
“Don’t call me that.” He grumbled as he walked over and handed Sirius the jet black liner.
Sirius uncapped it with a pop.
“So? Who is this mystery date of yours?”
“Yeah, that’s not happening.”
“You gotta give me something to work with. What if you go missing and the police ask me to describe the suspect but I don’t have anything to tell them, so they think I’m the one that killed you since I saw you last while I was helping you get ready for this date, and then I go to jail forever for a crime I didn’t commit, huh? I’m too pretty for jail!”
Regulus scoffed. “I’m not going to die.”
“How would you know? Murderers are very charming, you know. Actually, you should probably share your location with me, so I can make sure you don’t just end up dead in a ditch somewhere. Or what if he strands you on an island in a cave in the middle of nowhere and no one can hear your pleas for help because you’re so far away from civilization? Or-”
“Okay, Sirius, I’m not giving you my location because I’m not getting murdered.” Regulus bit his lip. “I actually think… you’d like him a lot. He’s really kind — kinder than me, that’s for sure.”
“That’s not a high bar though,” Sirius retorted. “Ouch! Don’t pinch me, you gremlin, or I’m going to fuck up your makeup.”
“Drama queen.” Regulus muttered, but held still as Sirius finished his eyeliner.
“Alright, we’re all done,” Sirius turned to the clock on Regulus’ desk. “With ten minutes to spare! Enough time for you to at least tell me your plans so I know where to look when you go missing.”
“I don’t know where I’m going. He’s planning the date as a surprise,” Regulus said with a small smile.
Sirius flopped down on the bed with a loud groan. “Are you begging to get murdered? You’re actually an idiot. Why would-”
“He asked me out!” Regulus snapped. Though he knew Sirius’ needling was coming from a place of love, which he really did appreciate given the siblings’ complicated history, Regulus’ patience for his brother’s antiques was running thin. “He wanted to take me out and I said yes. He just told me what time he’d come by my room to pick me up and-”
“Wait, you gave him your address?!” Sirius shot to his feet. “This is so bad. What if- Okay, wait no.” He took a deep breath. “You know what? He’s coming here now, right? This is actually good. I can take a good look at him and remember his face for the police report. And I’ll threaten him, too.”
“You will do no such thing!” Regulus exclaimed in alarm. “Don’t drive him off! I-”
“If he leaves because of that, it means he was trying to murder you, so good riddance!”
“Did you hear nothing I’ve been telling you? I know him well enough to know that he would never hurt me, okay? He is a miracle of a human being — beautiful inside and out, sweeter to me than anyone else, and way nicer to me than I deserve. He’s like the sun — he’s so bright and cheerful and everyone in his orbit is warmed by his light.” Though his cheeks were red, Regulus spoke firmly.
Sirius froze, dazed by Regulus’ uncharacteristically passionate speech. “Wow, now I really want to meet this bloke. Either he’s really good at brainwashing people or-”
Sirius was saved from his brother’s wrath by a knock. Regulus ran to the door, eliminating any chance Sirius might have had to reach the door before him.
“Hey, Regulus. You look… wow,” came a familiar voice.
“Thank you,” Regulus replied softly.
Like a puppy rushing to greet their owner at the door, Sirius jumped off the bed to meet his best friend. “James!”
“Oh! Hey Sirius,” replied a slightly surprised James Potter.
“James, you’re just in time. Regulus is going on a date — a first date, no less — and he doesn’t even know where the bloke is taking him! You’ve got to help me threaten the guy so Regulus doesn't get murdered.”
“Shut up, Sirius!” Regulus hissed. He turned to James, mortified. “I told him I would be just fine, but did he listen? Of course not.”
James bit his lip, trying to hold back a laugh. “Remus has been listening to a lot of true crime lately. Although I thought you refused to listen to it with him?”
Sirius huffed. “He always has it on, I hear bits and pieces against my will.” Then, he brightened. “Maybe the universe wanted me to hear it, though, to save my brother’s life! I made him look too good for this date. Murderers love pretty victims.”
“He does look very pretty,” James agreed.
Regulus rolled his eyes and turned away, though not before James could see the soft pink blush coating his cheeks.
Sirius obliviously nodded. “Exactly the issue! I shouldn’t have done his makeup or tied his shirt like that.”
James’ eyes trailed down Regulus’ frame, from his long dark lashes and high cheekbones to the black choker accentuating his long neck standing in contrast with his pale skin to where his collarbones peeked out from his top. James gulped.
“Where is your date, anyway?” Sirius frowned, looking over at the clock. “Being late is not a good quality, Reg. Didn’t you say you were leaving at two?”
Regulus smirked. “You know what? You’re right. I did say that.”
He grabbed James’ wrist. James let himself be led out through the doorway. Regulus tossed a quick “Bye!” over his shoulder without looking at his brother, before shutting the door.
Sirius blinked. He blinked again.
“Wait, your date is with James?”
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A/N: Trying to get back into writing! This was so fun to write :) It's my first Jegulus fic that I'm posting (actually my first time writing a fic for this fandom) and it's not beta read or anything, but I had a blast writing this silly little fic. I hope you enjoyed reading it!
