Review: Louder Than Hunger by John Schu
It has been a while since I've read a powerful, moving children's novel and I knew that Louder Than Hunger would scratch that itch. I would say that it firmly straddles the line between middle-grade and YA, as the protagonist is a young teen but the main subject matter (anorexia) is dark and it doesn't shy away from the graphic reality of that. It's probably best suited to readers aged 13+ and every reader should proceed with caution.
Jake loves books, musical theatre and spending time with his grandma. He hates food, mirrors and feeling enormous. He is desperate to avoid attention, so he tries his best to be as small as he possibly can be and not eating seems to be the only way to do that. How long can he possibly keep it up before he disappears?
Jake is haunted by the malevolent voice of his eating disorder, which consistently interrupts his thoughts, seemingly whenever he is otherwise having a good time. It's such an honest, accurate representation of how an eating disorder operates and makes for devastating reading that had me on edge the whole way.
Many readers will agree that there is nothing better than the smell of new books but Jake almost treats inhaling the scent as eating or consuming. This reversal of something that is so often considered to be harmless and calming was quite disturbing and just one of many examples of the damage within the mind of someone with an eating disorder.
I have never been diagnosed with an eating disorder but I definitely have an unhealthy relationship with food. I read every nutritional label, I count calories and I try my best to keep within my 'allowance'. I don't get physical symptoms when I fail to do these things but I think it does affect my mood. It's exhausting and difficult, so I can only imagine how hard it must be when it consumes your whole life.
Jake's description of how it feels when he eats and thinks about the food inside his body could only come from someone who has definitely had these thoughts before. It's so graphic and it actually made me feel queasy. I will actually go as far as to say that it caused me to be disgusted by eggs and cereal and other foods that I loved, so I would again urge precaution before encouraging young readers with disordered eating to read this book.
I think the saddest part of the book was that Jake is a strong empath and he is well aware of the worry that he is causing his family. Despite this, it's not enough for him to silence the voice, which is literally louder than his very natural hunger. He wants to eat but his mind simply won't allow him to. I think one of the book's strongest merits is the way it illustrates eating disorders as existing in the mind rather than the body. Many sufferers really want to eat and get better but their illness is just too fierce and controlling.
Louder Than Hunger is a thought-provoking, emotional read. I think I wanted Jake to build more on his friendships and for there to be a bit more of a plot. However, I have since learned that this is based on the author's own experience, which makes sense because it does read like a memoir in places. I'm really glad I read it because it's an important topic that young readers should be aware of and it's an accurate portrayal. It's authentic and hopeful but really quite raw, so take care of yourself while reading!
