synopsis; junhan gives your lips one last lingering kiss before pulling away and checking his phone, “your break is almost over, i’m going home now and preparing for your visit. remember, dont get caught.”
genre; smut
words; 2.5k
warnings; idol!junhan, idol!reader, f!reader, grinding, cursing, oral f receiving, dirty talk, being caught, tit play, fingering, riding
a/n: this isn’t usually the content i post, but i wanted to give it a try, let me know what u think 🩷
working at the same company as your boyfriend, junhan, has its perks, but mostly, its downsides. you get to see him every day, which is amazing, but the two of you can't act like a couple in front of the staff or artists. if someone lets your relationship slip to the media, then neither of you would have a job anymore.
junhan tries his best not to make you feel neglected; he'll casually brush his fingers against yours in the coffee shop line, send you sweet texts when you're in the practice room, and even skips practice sometimes to take you to an empty room during your break so he can kiss you, which he knows you've been craving all day.
there he was, hand resting on your soft cheek, your back pushed against the cold wall of an abandoned practice room that hasn't been renovated in years, and his lips kissing slowly against yours.
"I missed you today," you say in a whiny tone after pulling away from the embrace, your lips pouting, though he can't see in the darkness.
"i missed you too, Y/N. why don't you spend the night with me tonight? it's been a few weeks.."
your manager is rigorous and refuses to let any of your members bring men over, so the only option is to sleep with junhan at the xdinary heroes dorm.
within a matter of seconds, your tone changed from needy to excited, “of course, i have a few more hours of practice, then i’ll go home and pack my things.”
junhan gives your lips one last lingering kiss before pulling away and checking his phone, “your break is almost over, i’m going home now and preparing for your visit. remember, dont get caught,” he insures, which means you need to be completely covered and unrecognizable before even walking near the dorm.
there are always lingering fans that hang around just to get a glimpse of a kpop idol, and this is also why your manager doesn’t like visitors, but you’re smart.
at the dorm, junhan just announced you were spending the night, and it was met with “okay's” or “that's fine”, besides jooyeon. he is junhan’s roommate and has to be the one to sleep on the bottom bunk beneath the two of you.
“i’ve been traumatized enough by the noises i hear when she comes over, even if the tv is at max volume, AND i have headphones on…” jooyeon complains dramatically, by dragging out every word.
“jooyeon when you get a girlfriend, you’ll understand, plus it’s not like junnie has many options on where they can be alone,” jungsu tries to pursue him, but his stubborn head just shakes.
“yeah, also if you had a girlfriend i’m sure junhan wouldn’t mind blocking the noises out for you,” gunil adds to help your boyfriend's case, the youngest still not being persuaded.
“so are any of you going to switch me beds for the night?” jooyeon asks with eyebrows raised, and everyone falls silent, “see!”
“okay, what do you want in return?” junhan questions, wanting to stop the debating and get down to business.
jooyeon’s mouth went from a thin line to a wide smile at the bribery, “i want all 3 meals free for a whole week, and Y/N to set me up with one of her members.” his eyebrows wiggled at the last part while the other boys sighed.
“how about 2 weeks of free meals?”
“deal,” jooyeon maniacally laughs, as if he won the battle, and plops down on the couch with jiseok, who was also laughing.
junhan made sure the apartment was sparkling clean with the help of jungsu and seungmin, so it didn't take as long as it would have if he were alone. he thanked them quickly and hurried to take a shower when he saw the time; you were due at any moment.
you rang the boys' doorbell dressed in a hoodie with the hood tied tight around your head, insuring no hair showed, loose sweatpants, and a mask that covered the bottom half of your face.
jiseok opened the door with a laugh at your appearance, and you just squinted your eyes threateningly at him when you entered. "where's junnie?" you finally took the hoodie off, along with your mask, and shook your hair loose from the hair tie.
"he's in the shower," jungsu informs. ablush heats across your face when the memory of the two of you sharing a shower runs through your head. "i'm going to tell him i'm here, so he'll hurry," you over-share, so the boys don't think anything nefarious is going to happen.
outside of the bathroom door, the sound of water running made you giggle on the inside like it was the first time you had seen him in the shower, but everything he does makes you feel like when you first started dating.
you open the door, the humidity instantly hits your face, and before you can announce yourself, junhan speaks, "jooyeon, why do you always need to use the bathroom when i'm showering?"
your eyebrow raises, "does that happen often?" you ask with a giggle, and the bathroom curtain opens enough for junhan's head to poke out. "baby! it happens far too often. wait in my room, i'll be out soon."
instead of listening to his request, you sit on the bathroom sink to wait for him, "take your time, i'll just sit here and talk with you."
junhan tells you about the movies he picked out for the two of you tonight, while he finishes up, and when the water turns off, your ears go red.
"Y/N, can you give me the towel on the 3rd hook?" you oblige, walking to the shower, and peek through the curtain with a nod of approval after seeing your boyfriend's body. he laughs at where your eyes travel and grabs the towel from your hand, "pervert."
in junhan's room, he lets you borrow a t-shirt, considering the hoodie and sweatpants are beginning to make you hot, and he grabs your cheeks in his hands when he sees you in his clothes. "i've never worn that shirt outside of the dorm, so you can have it without fans getting suspicious." he knew you always wanted to keep his clothes like a normal girlfriend so you pucker your lips as a 'thank you'.
he bends his head down slightly and gives your welcoming lips a kiss, then pulls away with a hum. "lay down Y/N, i want to play until jooyeon comes in for the night."
your heart thumps at the low voice that came from your boyfriend, and without a word, you crawl up the ladder to junhan's bunk bed. he follows soon, after putting a movie on the tv, and crawls on top of your body.
you become shy when junhan begins lifting up your shirt without any words, but made sure to maintain eye contact with you. he drags the tips of his fingers against your skin until your breasts become exposed, creating goosebumps on your stomach.
"i missed you so much," junhan whispers while admiring your boobs, gripping one hard in his hand. the sensitivity made your back arch, and a mocking laugh comes from your boyfriend, who is usually a sweet lover.
he leans down and takes a nipple in his mouth, sucking on it with roughness. a loud moan threatened to come out of your mouth, so you pressed your lips tight together, then looked down at junhan who was now staring back and flicking his tongue across the nub of your nipple.
you could feel his hard-on against your leg through his boxers when he begins moving down your body, kissing your skin as he travels, and leaving a few bites on your hips.
junhan wastes no time when he settles in between your thighs to spread your legs wide. "i guess you missed me too, huh?" he smirks at the wet spot on your panties and you tsk at him with a blush, "of course i missed you, baby."
junhan slides your panties to the side, teasing one of your folds with his long finger, "what did you miss about me exactly?" you huff at his insistence, then push your hips into him so he'd touch the place that was beating for him.
"uh uh Y/N, be good and answer me." you weren't used to this side of junhan which made you even more wet for him. "i miss your fingers when they are inside of me." you finally speak in a whisper, still conscious of the people in the dorm. he hums, but wasn't 100% satisfied with your answer.
junhan brushes his finger over your clit and rubs in small circles until your body feels hot from pleasure. he drags a finger with his other hand in between your folds and smirks up at your teeth that was biting your bottom lip hard.
he slides a finger in your wetness, making sure to watch your reaction, and pumps with more force than he usually does. the tip of his finger reaches your g-spot perfectly, which makes not moaning almost impossible, but you succeed. "p-please baby, more fingers," you plead in a shaky voice that almost made junhan cum right there.
"how many fingers do you want, doll?" your pussy clenched around his finger at the nickname, and he chuckled at the feeling. "3 fingers please junnie," you say in the same needy voice.
junhan curls his finger once in your pussy before adding two more, stretching you wider. "do you want me to lick your clit, doll?" you nod quickly with tears of pleasure falling from your eyes, and tangle your fingers in junhan's already dried hair, when his lips kiss your clit softly.
he swirls his tongue around the nub with a smirk at your shaking body, still making sure to curl his fingers to hit the right spot, and you whine loudly. "i'm so close junnie, faster please."
junhan fastens the pace on his fingers and flicks his tongue until his jaw is sore, "cum for me," he mumbles in your pussy and you lift your hips up until the orgasm ripples through your body.
he puts his free hand over your mouth so you can moan loudly when you cum and lifts his face off your pussy, but still pumps his fingers until your high rides out.
"mmm baby, that was the best i've ever felt. you're so good to me," you mumble after he pulls his fingers out slowly. he had a blush on his face and leaned his body up to kiss your lips sweetly.
you wrap your arms around his shoulders and slide your tongue in his mouth during the kiss, earning a grunt from him. his hard-on was not easy to miss, and you giggle in the kiss when he begins to grind on your bare thigh.
you turn the two of you around so you are now on top of him and continue the grinding. "i think it's my turn to make you feel good, junnie."
you lift your hips up and look down at his core, rubbing your hand on the elastic of his underwear. junhan takes his shirt off to give you a better view, and you lift the band up, sliding your hand inside his underwear to grip his dick firmly.
he grunts again, watching your movements intensely, but you didn't want him to wait any longer. you take his underwear off and watch his dick slap against his stomach, "i love your dick, junnie," you whisper, admiring the precum leaking from his tip.
junhan gives your ass a soft slap while you take off your panties, making sure they don't fall off the bed for someone else to find. "these are mine now," junhan smirks, grabbing the lace fabric from you and hiding them under his pillow while you straddle his waist again.
you line up your needy hole to his tip and sink down, "and here i thought i was the pervert of our relationship," you let out a giggle that soon turned to a gasp when you sat completely on his dick.
junhan tilts his head back at the feeling of your tight, gummy walls engulfing him and grips your ass hard to keep his moans in.
when you begin to rock your hips against his, junhan lifts your shirt up, exposing your beautiful tits, and moans quietly. "go faster, please, baby." he bucks his hips up impatiently, and you smile at him being needy.
you obey gladly, bouncing on him increasingly faster while he begins to play with your boobs that were matching your bounces.
to stop himself from moaning, junhan grabs the back of your neck and brings you down to kiss his lips sloppily. you whine in his mouth with every bounce, and he holds your hips when he notices you slowing down, thrusting up in you to give you a break.
your pussy clenches around his dick, the faster he bucks, and you can feel another orgasm coming. "it's okay, baby, cum again, i want to get all the orgasms i can out of you."
his words hit you straight to the core, and you couldn't help but cum right on the spot. junhan had an evil smirk on his face and turned the two of you around on the bed so quick you almost didn't realize it happened.
he thrusts in you harder than he ever has before; you thought the bed would break from the pressure. "god baby, you're so tight," he growls in your ear, and you clench again. "cum in me junnie, i want to feel you," you whisper back in a pant, and he gives a few more hard thrusts before spilling inside of you.
you run your fingers through his thick hair and pull on the roots as you cum for a third time, your chest heaving at the pleasure.
junhan pulls out slowly after both of you ride out your highs, and he plops on the squeaky bed next to you, still panting. "that was the best sex we've ever had," he chuckles and wraps his arms around you so your sweaty bodies are pressed close to each other. you didn't have the energy to speak, so you just nodded in agreement, tangling your legs with his.
"are you guys finally done?" a voice from below asks in a hopeful tone, and your eyes shoot open wide. "jooyeon? when did you come in?" junhan asks, closing his eyes in embarrassment.
"i believe it was sometime in between Y/N's first and second orgasm," the younger boy laughs, making you cover your red face with your hands. junhan cowards in your neck and chuckles, "i guess we were too focused on each other to notice."
word count: 12k
tags: sfw for most part except a small nsfw bit at the end, college au, menace!junhan, yearning like SO MUCH yearning, jiseok man wtf, lighthearted, comedy kinda, everyone is tired of them, getting together, he's stupidly in love, she makes bad decisions, happy ending duh, fem reader, DRAMAA, friends to lovers, TENSION!!!, he's protective, junhan x jiseok duo lip bite
plot: you keep getting into bad relationships because you think he would NEVER like you back and he keeps getting annoyed at it; he is SKEEMING and plotting to break you up with your current shitty boyfriend bc he’s obviously the better choice (he’s petty and sneaky with it
“How did you even meet this guy?” Hyeongjun asks in a displeased tone, walking down the hallway while looking at the photo of your boyfriend shown on your phone.
“Dating app.” You answer casually, earning a judgemental look from the older. “What? Don’t judge, it was Jiseok’s idea! He said I need to be more extroverted!” You defend yourself, putting your phone in your pocket.
“More???” Hyeongjun widens his eyes, shaking his head. “Being with you two already feels like being inside a rage room on steroids, I don’t think you two should give each other advice like…ever.” He scoffs, lip twitching.
“Hey, shouldn’t you be happy for me?” You frown, admittedly hurt. Hyeongjun was your closest friend and the last thing you expected from him was to act this way over you getting in a relationship, when he should be happy for you.
The taller sighs, turning around and stopping in front of you, looking down at you. “I want you to be happy, yes. Do I agree with getting together with a guy on a dating app when most of his photos are him shirtless and the only thing in his bio is his instagram? Not really.”
“Why are you being so pissy about it?” You ask bothered, starting to get angry.
“I just don’t have a good feeling. Look, if he’s great then great, I'll apologize to you but if he turns out to be an asshole, please, for me if not for you, drop him.” He answers, voice soft.
You wanted to defend yourself but he /is/ right. You do have a history of staying with people that aren’t necessarily good for you just because it feels good to know someone wants you. So instead of arguing, you nod shortly, and say bye to the older as he walks away to band practice, pursing your lips.
If you think about it, this is really Hyeongjun’s fault. You’ve been having feelings for him for a year now and you’re pretty sure he doesn’t reciprocate them. He’s a very straightforward person, so he’d surely confess if he felt anything, right? Really, he should blame himself for the fact that you keep searching for someone that would take your mind off him.
“Kwak Jiseok, I hope you lock your house tonight and close your windows.” Hyeongjun says in a serious tone when entering the practice room, the rhythm guitarist turning to him with wide eyes after glancing briefly at Jungsu, who made it clear he’s on his own from the way he so conveniently put on his headphones.
“Whatever it is you think I did, it was Jooyeon and I have proof.” The older says quickly, pointing to the bassist who was tuning his bass on the other side of the room, unaware of the situation.
“Dating apps??” Hyeongjun whines, putting the guitar strap on his shoulder, looking at his friend tiredly. “Why would you say that??”
“Wha-OH!” Jiseok grimaces. “So she did find a match.”
“So she did find a match mimimimi.” Hyeongjun mocks annoyedly, tuning his guitar with a pout.
“You know, this could’ve been avoided if you confessed.” Jiseok chimes with a knowing grin, dodging the tuner the other guitarist throws at him.
“You could avoid a broken leg if you stopped talking.” He answers shortly, before tuning his guitar, playing the most aggressive guitar riff he knows, earning a raised eyebrow from Gunil when he enters the practice room.
“Do I want to know?” He asks, to which everyone shakes their head, deciding to take advantage of Hyeonjun’s bad mood and start practice before he gets more pissed off.
Han Hyeongjun wasn’t one to get pissed off easily. Actually, if you were to ask him, he’d tell you he doesn’t really remember ever getting full blown angry. However, whenever /you/ were the topic of conversation, he was…sensitive to say the least.
Between casually stretching his foot out at the cafeteria resulting in the girl that he overheard comment on your looks embarrassingly fall and the constant fighting whenever one of your dates would as much as make a bad joke about you, no one was safe.
He was never violent, or aggressive, just very, VERY petty and sneaky. That’s how he would get away with erasing someone’s name from the band practice auditions to make sure they’re not called back just because they shitted on his favorite guitarist last week. He was a good person, really, but grudges were something he did /not/ know how to let go of.
That is also why you and him have been on a rocky path for the past half a year or so. He wasn’t resentful towards you necessarily, but rather your bad decisions and the way you would always somehow end up with the worst type of people as your boyfriends.
After a few dates with the new guy, you decided that he was actually quite nice and you wouldn’t mind taking it further. Maybe, for once in his life, Hyeongjun would be wrong about something. For the first month or so, things were going incredibly well. You’d talk daily, hang out as much as possible and although he was too affectionate in public for your taste, kissing you and touching you whenever and wherever, it wasn’t bothersome.
Your friend, being a good friend, backed off and tried to keep the snarky comments to a minimum, until the second month rolled around. The relationship wasn’t particularly bad, it was simply…weird. Some days he would be super affectionate and some he wouldn’t even ask about your day. You didn’t think much of it since it was better than the guys you’ve dated before, but that doesn’t mean Hyeongjun didn’t notice. Things only got worse after the first big fight.
The guitarist looks at your crying face with a pained expression, and simply sighs while pulling you into a hug. You knew that as soon as you told him what happened, the possibility of you also getting into a fight with him was high so you spent a few minutes crying quietly and debating whether telling him what happened would be worth it while sitting on the guitarist’s couch as he was rubbing your arm.
Eventually, you look up at him and explain the fight, and he instantly knew where this was going. “And I just- I didn’t feel like watching his stupid game because he always talks about sports and you know I don’t understand anything a-and-” You sob, the older rubbing your arms while hugging you, handing you a tissue while staying quiet.
“I know it was important to him but going to the date we already planned a week ago was important to me too and he-” You hiccup, and Hyeongjun’s heart audibly breaks. “He said it’s whatever because he’s gonna go with his friend anyways…”
“Wait all of this on the day of your date?” The guitarist frowns, and when you confirm it his eyes widen. “Wha-”
“He forgot the dates collided and he said he’s been looking forward to it for a month but he never told me so I would’ve known not to put the date today but-” You sniffle, getting closer to your friend. “He said it’s whatever, we can have dates whenever but I really was looking forward to it because I planned on going to the sea and watching the sunset because I never had anyone do that for me…” You cry harder, Hyeongjun closing his eyes pained.
“But he said it’s a stupid sunset there’s one every night and that he’s lucky he’s got friends that actually care about him…he meant this girl he barely befriended a week ago and said she’s going with him and said I should really reflect on it cuz maybe I’m not that good of a girlfriend…or person…” You sob, blowing your nose, Hyeongjun’s expression turning into annoyance.
“How does HIM being an asshole make *you* a bad girlfriend??” He asks scandalized.
“I just-he basically said I’m not good enough for him and left and he’s at the game now and having fun and probably thinking that girl is way better than me and I just-” You cry, holding onto your friend’s shirt.
Hyeongjun stays quiet for a few moments, simply rubbing your back and letting you calm down a bit before saying. “Get up.”
“Wha-” You frown confused, getting up with him as he puts on his shoes and a big hoodie, putting one of his sweaters on you too. “What are you doing-” You ask tiredly, voice barely above a whisper.
“You wanted to see the sunset on the beach.” He reminds you casually, grabbing his keys and some tissues. “C’mon we can still catch it but we have to leave now.” He explains a little hurriedly, extending his hand to you. You smile weakly, holding onto it and leaving with him.
You two quickly stopped at a convenience store to get some drinks and food before driving to the beach. On the drive there, all you can do is look at Hyeongjun’s side profile, thinking about how lucky you were to be his friend in this lifetime. You decide to ignore the pang of pain hitting your chest when you remember that the person next to you is in fact your friend, not your boyfriend.
You smile sadly, because if Hyeongjun was your boyfriend you would kiss him shortly at the red light, thanking him for making you feel better, but he’s not so you settle for putting on his favorite song to play in the car, his eyes instantly lighting up at the sound.
When you get to the beach, you put a small blanket down and sit next to each other, quietly eating your tteokbokki while sharing the two soda cans between each other. And when your boyfriend calls you frantically multiple times, you decide to put your phone on “do not disturb” and rest your head on Hyeongjun’s shoulder while looking at the sunset.
You two don’t talk for a long time, instead choosing to silently enjoy each other’s company and make sure to take some pictures because although it might seem stupid, this /did/ in fact mean a lot to you. The taller glances at you, your eyes locking and for a split moment you were wondering if kissing him right now would be that bad of an idea.
The other's eyes travel to your lips quickly, before looking back at the sunset and you wonder if you had some sauce leftover from the food. You didn’t.
Sadly for Hyeongjun, that incident wasn’t enough for you to break up with your boyfriend. How could you when after seeing the photo of you two at the beach he got you flowers and made sure to take you out to dinner as an apology? Hyeongjun rolled his eyes when you excitedly told him about it, walking away to band practice as he always did, refusing to engage in the conversation, knowing he had nothing nice to say.
Eventually, on the third month mark, they started coexisting together, although it wasn’t exactly peaceful. “Yeah, she really likes otters.” Your friend smiles sarcastically from next to you on the couch after gifting you a plushie he got from his Japan trip a few days ago.
You look at the plushie admiring it, before your boyfriend blurts out. “Yeah, I obviously knew that.” He rolls his eyes with a chuckle. “I was gonna have it be a surprise, but whatever…I was actually planning on taking her on a date to the aquarium tomorrow.” He chimes proudly, earning a satisfied smirk from Hyeongjun who was resting his back on the armrest, sighing with pursed lips when you widen your eyes, head turning to your boyfriend.
“Ah that’s really…shouldn’t you know she hates aquariums?” Hyeongjun frowns with fake sympathy, shaking his head as your boyfriend freezes in place, looking at you for confirmation. When you pout nodding slowly, wondering why he doesn’t know when it’s something you’ve told him during your first date, he clears his throat.
“I mean I-”
“They make her cry because she hates seeing those poor animals held captive…” Hyeongjun continues with a sad expression, hand resting on your shoulder comfortingly as your boyfriend close to explodes. “I really thought you’d know this…” He tsks, holding back a mischievous smile that you were unaware of.
You were starting to wonder: why is Hyeongjun more mindful of your likes and dislikes than your own boyfriend?
That question popped up multiple times in your head. It was hard for it not to when whenever you’d talk to your friend about your boyfriend, he would have the same disappointed expression, the same type of sentences leaving his mouth every single time.
“What do you mean he didn’t open the door for you??” “So you’re telling me…he forgot that you had a doctor’s appointment?” “Who even ignores that their girlfriend HATES mint ice cream?? No, the thought isn’t what’s important in this situation.”
It got to a point where you were desperately trying to only speak about the good things with Hyeongjun but it was difficult when by the end of the third month things were getting rockier and rockier with your boyfriend too.
Like the day of your birthday, when Hyeongjun, being the amazing friend he is, had the idea of you all going to your favorite restaurant before the actual party. It was going great, until he suggested to your boyfriend that he orders your food like a good gentleman while you were away.
When you came back from the bathroom you found in front of you a plate of shellfish. The one thing you are strongly allergic to and the one thing you don’t even like the taste of. Your smile slowly drops as you sit down, blinking at the food in front of you.
Your boyfriend looks at you proudly but when you raise your head you find yourself searching for Hyeongjun, who was already raising his hand for the waiter and asking them for your favorite type of pasta instead, giving your boyfriend a very disapproving look, arms crossed.
You bite your lip, amused at your boyfriend’s angry expression as he tries to defend himself, looking at Hyeongjun though your eyelashes as your head is ducked down. The guitarist gives you a quick wink holding back a smile as well, choosing to look at his phone instead of giving the other any more of his time.
That night, your boyfriend kept himself glued to you, arm wrapped around your shoulders while kissing your cheek. He was overcompensating. You knew it, but you couldn’t help but find it cute…the times your eyes wouldn’t fall on the way Hyeongjun’s adam's apple moved when he laughed at something Jiseok said.
When the time to give presents came, you see a perfume you mentioned a few times in the bag, your lips parting, eyes falling directly on Hyeongjun’s puffed up cheeks, who lets out a cough in order not to laugh. Jiseok covers his mouth to make his amusement less visible, when you blink at your confused boyfriend.
“What. Don’t tell me you don’t like it i li-” He starts but you cut him off shaking your head, pecking his lips with a nervous laugh.
“Ah n-no it’s just…I already have it…I thought I told you Hyeongjun got it for me a week ago? It’s the perfume I’m currently wearing…” You explain, your boyfriend Rolling his eyes angrily.
“Of fucking course he did.” He growls, looking at the taller who was returning an innocent and surprised look.
“No, it’s amazing really! This perfume is kinda hard to find anyways, so I won’t run out.” You nod trying to do damage control.
“It’s whatever really, the real surprise isn’t that…It’s for when we’re alone.” He smirks looking at Hyeongjun, who grips onto his glass just a little tighter, expression turning serious, eyes throwing daggers into the other’s direction. And when your boyfriend whispers something in your ear, hand on your thigh as his eyes don’t leave the guitarist’s, Hyeongjun runs his tongue in his cheek, drinking the remaining alcohol he had in his glass.
You didn’t think much of it. Maye he really was that good of a boyfriend and got you two gifts. The rest of the night goes pretty smoothly, and you find your head resting on your boyfriend’s, thinking that maybe it doesn’t matter that you two had another fight just a day ago and that maybe the period where you argue constantly finally finished.
You were wrong. Very wrong. You were wrong because you walk with your boyfriend into his house and the first thing he does is pull you into a heated kiss, which you don’t necessarily mind. You kiss him back, letting out a small noise when he picks you up and walks to the bedroom with you, surprised by the sudden affection.
It’s not like he was never affectionate, but he was definitely more so when you were with other people. As if loving you was a performance, not something he did because he wanted to. People always needed to be present for you to feel loved, so you definitely felt relief, thinking to yourself maybe you’re finally good enough to be loved in private too.
He pulls your shirt off in a hurry, getting on top of you after taking his off as well and starts kissing you harder, his free hand unbuttoning your pants. The room was filled with heavy pants and breaths, and when your hand travels down his body you hear a moan.
A moan of a name that’s not yours. He knows he fucked up, because he stops for a millisecond, before trying to kiss you harder and groan louder, in a stupid attempt to make you forget the name you just heard escape his lips.
You push him away with an angry frown, catching your breath. “What the fuck was that.” You ask, the other trying to go back to kissing your jaw, mumbling about how he didn’t say anything, earning an amused scoff from you. You push him away completely, looking at him. “I’m not fucking stupid.”
The man groans, angry at the slip up as he runs a hand over his face. “It’s not a big fucking deal, oh my god!”
“Not a big deal?? You moan another bitch’s name when we’re about to have sex and you think it’s not a big deal?” You ask angry, getting up from the bed, putting your shirt on.
“Well maybe if you didn’t keep me waiting four months to fuck you I wouldn’t moan someone else’s name!” He bites back, getting in your face.
Your eyes widen in disbelief, laughing. Suddenly, it all made sense. Him being so feisty about physical affection unless it was something sexual, him only seeming affectionate in public.
When you started dating you told him you don’t like rushing things and that it takes a while for you to get comfortable with someone to have sex with them, and he seemed understanding back then. Well, from the looks of it, it was a fucking lie.
“You said you understood! Is that why you’re still with me?? You’re waiting for me to give you the green light so you can finally fuck me before leaving??” You raise your voice, staring at him.
“Oh please, as if you weren’t thinking about other people. You want me to think you weren’t thinking about your fuckass friend that keeps butting in while I was kissing your neck??” He raises his eyebrow, making you angrier.
“No, I fucking didn’t. Because unlike you, I have some respect for this shithole of a relationship.” You clarify. It wasn’t a lie. There might have been moments when you doubted it, but when it came down to kissing your boyfriend or even now, doing more, your mind wasn’t wondering. You didn’t allow it because no matter your feelings or how the relationship was going at that given time, it was disrespectful.
Relationships are all about staying loyal to a person that you decide to be with, it’s a choice you make. The worst part of it? It wasn’t a random name he moaned. It was the name of his so-called friend that he went with at that stupid game, which meant something either happened or he wished it did, and you were not in the headspace to find out so you left his house instead.
You go to your house crying because you really thought that maybe tonight things were going to become more stable and that finally, you will feel loved in private too because he wants to make you feel good. Turns out, it wasn’t out of the need to make you happy but rather get it over with, and suddenly, you felt disgusted at the idea of almost letting him take advantage of you.
You know you shouldn’t, and you really don’t want to do it, but you can’t help but call Hyeongjun, because you needed to hear his voice. You needed someone you could yell at that would understand your anger wasn’t directed at them, and that someone was him.
It was always him. And same as always, he listens to you quietly, giving you comforting words here and there and letting out hums to let you know he’s still listening. That night you fall asleep on call with him as he practices blues on guitar, the sound calming you down instantly.
You weren’t going to forgive your boyfriend. Your plan was to ask exactly what happened that day at the game and get the answer you expected before breaking things off. Unfortunately that’s not what happened, because if there’s one thing your boyfriend was good at was damage control.
So, the next day, he shows up at your house with a big bouquet of flowers while crying, asks you to spend the day together and shows you that he blocked the girl’s contact on his phone. And because he’s just that good at what he does, you didn’t even ask if anything actually happened between them. Once again, you were pulled back in the endless cycle.
Things once again fell back in place for the time being, as you two headed to Jiseok’s house for a party he decided to hold in honor of…nothing really. He just felt like having some fun and honestly you were grateful for it because you could definitely use some fun with the way things have been going lately.
Unlike you, Hyeongjun was not a party type. He could enjoy concerts, festivals, and casual hang outs, but parties were always repetitive and quite boring. Being among drunk annoying people, stuck in a room with strangers, wasn't exactly his idea of fun. So why he was currently sitting on Jiseok's couch with a beer in his hand was a question only he knew the answer to.
Between the workload you've been having lately and the constant fights with your boyfriend, you were exhausted. However, you also missed the guys, especially Jiseok since you two saw each other only once this month, when you had your birthday.
Ideally, you'd be on the couch next to Hyeongjun right now, placing bets on who'll be the first to throw up or who will lose at uno, but instead, you were with your boyfriend in the kitchen, looking around as he made conversation with people he didn't know.
When you turn your head, you get to truly /look/ at your friend. He looked good. Too good. His hair was let down and he had a white button up with a gray blazer over it, but that really wasn't what was most captivating about him.
It was the way he was currently man spreading, one arm around the couch as the other was holding his drink. It wasn't his usual demeanor and it was impossible for you to look away. His expression wasn't a pleased one when his eyes met yours, but you didn't have to ask yourself why, because you knew.
Whenever your boyfriend would go to parties, he would get embarrassingly drunk and almost always make some kind of scene. Hyeongjin knew, because you've told him before, but you couldn't /not/ invite him, since the idea of you being over a dude's house surrounded by guys your boyfriend didn't exactly know, looked bad.
You also know a big part of his annoyance is the fact that you gave your boyfriend yet another chance.
You understood it wasn't ideal, and that's why you now simply purse your lips looking into Hyeongjun's eyes, before he lets out an annoyed scoff, looking away and taking another sip of his most likely non-alcoholic beer.
Your boyfriend wraps his arm around you and you can already tell he started to get tipsy when his lips go to your jaw, suddenly being affectionate, because of course he was. The only times he was able to show affection was when he was in public or at least tipsy, as if that was the only time he found you attractive enough. This time was no different.
Thankfully, Jiseok being Jiseok, sees your bored expression and comes to you, dragging you to the dance floor with a huge grin, despite your boyfriend's complaint.
At times like these, you were truly grateful to have the friends you had because although your boyfriend was now complaining and giving you two a death stare, you were screaming the lyrics of the song currently playing at the top of your lungs while jumping.
“Your boyfriend is kinda boring!” The blonde scrunches his nose, making you chuckle while shaking your head, eyes rolling.
“You guys just don't like him.” You correct and Jiseok nods quickly.
“Yes. Very much dislike him. But because I'm the best and most amazing friend you have, I let you bring him over!!” He says poking his tongue out.
“Do I need to remind you I’m with him thanks to you? Plus, You call people boring as if Hyeongjun isn't on the couch with a sour expression.” You raise your eyebrows with a teasing smile, when suddenly the smell of a cologne you know very well catches your attention from behind you.
Jiseok's eyes go wide, lips pursing with puffed out cheeks, pointing behind you, causing you to close your eyes tightly with a small curse.
You knew you were being childish with that comment, you knew that Hyeongjun would get bothered by it and you definitely knew it was stupid for you to be bitter about your friends being mean to your boyfriend when you've been dreading being in this relationship for as long as you have but you couldn’t help yourself.
Instead of talking back with a snarky comment, Hyeongjun simply walks past you to the kitchen, eyes avoiding you.
“You know why he's like this, right?” Jiseok asks softly, eyes scanning your face. You sigh, nodding shorty, brushing your hair back. “Then why don't you do something about it?”
Looking back on it, that question didn't mean what you thought it meant. But at the time, the only issue you saw was your friend being mad at you for staying in a relationship that wasn't fulfilling.
You didn’t want to talk to Hyeongjun about it, because you knew it would end in the same way it always does: Him being bothered by you still staying and you being bothered by him being so involved even though you were the one to tell him your problems in the first place.
Around the two hour mark, you let out a sigh as your boyfriend was getting too handsy on the couch and excuse yourself with the pretense that you had something to take care of, so you walk outside. That's when you spot your friend sitting on the floor next to the pool cross legged, looking at his reflection.
You walk to him and you’re pretty sure he knows it’s you, because he refuses to look up even when you take a seat next to him. You both stay quiet for a while until you break the silence.
“I want to talk.” You say softly, earning a small chuckle from the older, eyes fixated on the water.
“I don’t. Go talk to your boyfriend, if he’s even awake enough to hold a conversation at this hour.” He bites, lips curled into a sarcastic beam.
“Hyeongjun.” You warn, head turned to him.
“What.” The long haired man finally turns his head to you, tone cold. “What do you want to talk about? You know what I think, I know what you think. We don’t see eye to eye, we’ll just end up in a nasty fight if I really say what I have to say right now, and the last thing I want is to leave you alone with him at this party.”
“We fixed things.” You defend yourself, voice coming out smaller than intended, the older scoffing in disbelief, tilting his head with a frown.
“Fixed? You two had a fight a few days ago. He moaned another girl’s name when he was about to- You called me crying at two in the morning and you want me to believe now everything is fixed?” Your friend reminds you, propping one leg up to rest his arm on it, the other arm used to support himself on the ground. “I think you just swept everything under the rug instead of actually fixing it, the way you’ve been doing since forever.”
You didn’t like to fight with Hyeongjun because everytime his tone got like this, you could feel your eyes fill with tears and your heart sink. “Why can’t you just-”
“Just what? Be happy for you? Be there for you? Listen to you? I do. I always have, I always will, but I'm really getting tired of wasting my time in trying to remind you what’s best for you when you always choose to settle for this.”
“I didn’t ask you to.” You whisper, looking down, and as soon as the words leave your lips you know it was a mistake, because Hyeongjun chuckles tiredly with a shake of his head, sipping on his beer.
“I told you. We can’t talk about this. Not today at least, we’ll just both get angrier and meaner and say things we don’t want to say. It’s whatever.”
“Is that why you’ve been ignoring me today?” You ask although you know the answer, trying to figure out if he is pissed enough to give you the silent treatment or not.
Hyeongjun doesn’t want to answer, and you can tell by the way his eyes look at the pool in front of you two instead of your eyes, sipping on his drink. For a moment, you were worried his annoyance got to a point where he would not even acknowledge your existence anymore, until his arm stretches to hand you his beer for you to have a sip, which you gladly take, holding the cup with both of your hands while your head rests on your friend’s shoulder.
He closes his eyes for a moment before his head rests on yours as well, your lips forming into a small smile. “I’m sorry.” You whisper, not wanting to clarify what for, but it’s not like you had to when it came to him.
“I know.” Is all Hyeongjun says, before the backdoor of the house swings open. Your now very drunk boyfriend holds the door angrily, making the both of you sit up and sharing a look.
“Of fucking course you’re with him.” He scoffs, walking to you. “Whatever. We’ll talk about it later. I wanna go home.” He slurs, grabbing your hand and dragging you inside before your friend could even process what was happening. He blinks a couple times before rushing inside behind you two.
“Can you not make a fucking scene right now?” You ask lowly, a couple people including Jiseok turning their heads towards you two.
“Stop being so dramatic, I just said we’re going home.” He rolls his eyes, trying to walk further.
“I’ll call the cab then.” You sigh, before your phone is snatched out of your hand.
“Pft, cab? Please, I’m perfectly capable of driving, do you think I'm dumb?” Your boyfriend raises his eyebrow, earning a frown from you.
“I think you’re drunk.” You clarify, reaching for your phone.
“I’m not drunk, I am wide awake. Even if I was drunk I'd probably be a better driver than your fuckass friend.” He growls, grabbing your wrist trying to walk away as you grunt for him to let go of it. You struggle for a bit when you suddenly see a familiar hand unclasp your boyfriend’s fingers from your wrist while taking your phone and handing it back to you.
Hyeongjun stands in front of you, veiny hand strongly gripping on the man’s wrist whose pain is visible even if he tries to put up a strong front, glaring. “She’s staying.” He says in a cold and serious tone, expression stoic. You look up at him, and you’d lie if you said your heart didn’t skip a beat.
Your boyfriend tries to get closer to the taller in an attempt to intimidate him, but Hyeongjun simply grips his wrist tighter, before harshly pushing it away. The other man scoffs, rubbing his wrist. “You’re letting him treat me like this? I said we’re leaving. Well, at least, I am, and you better come with me or else we’re done.”
Your initial instinct is to rush to your boyfriend’s side, too scared of a breakup. But then, you notice Hyeongjun putting his free hand behind his back to signal Jiseok, making the blonde sneakily hand the younger an empty bottle just in case things got ugly, so you change your mind.
You’d like to say it was because you realized how shitty of a boyfriend he’s been but the embarrassing reality is that the whole bit Hyeongjun is doing is the most insanely attractive thing you have ever witnessed and you, although maybe you shouldn’t, want to kiss him. So bad.
“Fucking bitch. We’re done.” Your now ex growls, leaving the room as you stare at the door with conflicted feelings.
Jiseok is quick to distract people and continue the party as if nothing happened because he knows the last thing you want right now is for everyone's attention to be on you, the only person left near you now being Hyeongjun.
He was about to ask something but instead wraps his arm around your shoulders without a word, letting your arms loop around his waist, head buried in the crook of his neck. “Need me to take you home?” He asks with a sigh when he feels your tears on his skin. You let out a small nod and say bye to Jiseok, apologizing for everything and promising to make up for it next time, before walking out with Hyeongjun.
The cold air barely got to touch your skin before he put his blazer on you without a word, walking to his car. You didn’t need to ask if his beer didn't have alcohol in it, because you knew it didn’t, so you quietly get in the passenger’s seat, hugging yourself tiredly.
You weren’t necessarily sad you broke up with your ex, you were sad you had to go through a break up in general, because that meant that if you wanted to go out with someone new, you’d have to deal with awful dates, awkward conversations and bad sex and it wasn’t really something you were excited about.
You were also hurt at the fact that you were willing to forgive something that painfully looked like cheating and were willing to overlook every fuckup he’s done, always going back to him, only for him to end things because you didn’t want to get into a car with a drunk driver.
However, as you watchHyeongjun drive, you realize you are kind of relieved he was the one to end things, because you don’t know if you would’ve been able to. A part of you always knew you were staying because that’s the best you thought you could do, not because you actually loved him, but it still sucked to think that you couldn’t even hold a bad relationship.
A million thoughts were going through your head, but when Hyeongjun stops at a red light, anger visible on his face although carefully contained, the thoughts about the breakup and your ex were suddenly replaced with every moment when whenever your ex fucked up, he was there to do things the right way.
You knew you liked Hyeongjun, for a long time too, but it was the first time you truly let yourself feel it, as your eyes scanned over the curves of his lips, the bridge of his nose, his visible collarbones because of his pulled shirt, his veiny hands and his resentful expression.
The ride is quiet for a bit, until he says “You should stop being around people that treat you like this…” Hyeongjun purses his lips, stopping the car on the side of the road.
You were nowhere near your house but you knew him well enough by now, so you are expected him to force you to have a conversation about this before you could get away.
“Hyeongjun don't be like this…not now.” You sigh, looking down, chewing on the inside of your cheek.
“Like what?” The man frowns. “You deserve someone that likes you. Hell, you deserve someone that doesn't try to drive you home drunk. You deserve someone that worships the ground you walk on, how many more times do you need to hear this until you start understanding?” He continues, annoyance clear in his tone.
“And where am I supposed to find someone like that?” You ask tiredly, looking at him with a sad expression.
Hyeongjun scans over your face for a few moments before crashing his lips on yours. You blink a couple times, taken aback but the other pulls away before you could even think about kissing back.
When you open your eyes, his expression tells you he's just as surprised with his actions as you are. He's about to open his mouth to perhaps apologize or find an excuse, but before he can, you grab his jaw and kiss him harder than before.
You kiss him harder than before because, against everything, he was the only one to always be there for you and truly no one would believe you if you tried to say you weren't heavily…/heavily/ attracted to Han Hyeongjun.
It takes a bit for Hyeongjun to truly process what’s happening, but when he finally does, he grabs the back of your neck and kisses you with a hunger you didn't know someone could feel.
You let out a small noise, body getting closer involuntarily. You slightly pull on his bottom lip, earning a low curse from the man, whose hands were now resting on your waist, fingers lightly digging in your skin.
You've also known each other for enough time now to know that unless you make it painfully clear you wanted this, he will pull away in a few seconds and never speak about it ever again.
That's why your hand travels on the side of his neck, tracing your thumb over his throat while kissing him more passionately, making the older let out a small shudder.
Thankfully, Hyeongjun isn't as oblivious as he wants people to believe he is, which is why you now find yourself being pulled on his lap with your legs on each side, his hands on your waist.
After a while, you pull away just enough to look over his face, breathing heavily. Your friend looks up at you with a hazy expression, gulping as his tongue trances over his lips, eyes traveling down your body then up to your lips again.
This time, the kiss was one of a man that knew what he wanted and he refused to give up until he had it. The idea of someone, especially Hyeongjun, wanting you so desperately he couldn't even be bothered to answer the phone that was currently ringing was dizzying.
Instead of picking it up, being the man he is, he turns his phone off without even looking at it, wrapping his arms around your lower back from under the blazer, letting out a sigh when you get closer to him, a soft noise escaping your lips.
“Why're you such a good kisser, hm?” You whisper teasingly, earning a small smile from the other whose hands now slowly travel down your waist then thighs, massaging them.
“Had to make sure I'll be good enough for you.” He answers and that might just be the most attractive thing a man has ever told you, your lips parting at the flirty response. Oh he was evil. He knew exactly what to say and what to do.
Hyeongjun seems pleased with your reaction, as he starts to peck your lips once with a small smirk, kissing your jaw softly. Your arms wrap around his neck, tilting your head with your eyes closed, hugging the man closer to you.
His lips travel down your neck, sighs escaping your lips, hearing a shaky breath from the older when your chest presses on him.
“We should stop…” Hyeongjun speaks softly, hands gripping on your waist, lips now kissing your collarbones as your hands slightly pull on his hair.
“Why?” You breathe out, caressing his hair while looking at him when he pulls away.
“Because I'm not letting our first time be in the middle of nowhere in my car.” He answers boldly, and your stomach drops at that.
He was never the type to tiptoe around things, but hearing him be so clear and unapologetic about what he wanted with you was definitely a side of him you haven't seen before.
You part your lips, blush spreading across your cheeks and you bite back a smile, looking down embarrassed. Hyeongjun smiles shyly, the boldness from just a few seconds ago now replaced by his red ears from embarrassment as his actions finally caught up to him.
Although he was embarrassed, you wanted nothing more but to kiss him until he was gasping for air so your hands go to his chest and move up to his neck slowly, kissing him and making his hips involuntarily move once with a small curse escaping his lips when you move his hands on your ass. Hyeongjun kisses back because he would be stupid not to. He brings you closer to him and kisses you just as passionately.
“I want this.” You whisper. “Even if it’s not now, I do want it.” You whisper in his ear, giving him the reassurance he didn’t ask for but that you knew he desperately needed, because although bold, Han Hyeongjun’s biggest fear was to be considered a bad person, especially by you.
“I don’t want to take advantage of you.” He manages to admit between heavy breaths, and so you cup his jaw, tilting his head up to look at you, giving the older a reassuring smile.
“You’re not. I actually think you should’ve done this way sooner, it would’ve saved us about 20 fights.” You joke with a smile and next thing you know, his head is buried in your neck, hugging your lower back tightly as he laughs, making you let out a small giggle at the sudden change in attitude, hugging his neck and kissing his head.
“You weren’t receptive.” He shifts the blame, chin on your shoulder.
“You could’ve made a move sooner!” You shrug jokingly, caressing his hair, earning a side eye from the taller.
“Are you saying I should've encouraged cheating?” He raises an eyebrow and you do so in return too.
“As if you weren’t so conveniently trying to show me how much better you were and encourage the breakup.” You chuckle, unbelieving his suddenly innocent act.
“Because you deserved better.” He answers simply.
“And you think you’re better?” You ask in a whisper, his chin between your fingers.
“No, I know I'm better.” He answers confidently in a whisper, looking into your eyes and pulling you closer.
You blink at him a couple times, and you are starting to regret starting this because now you’re seeing a side of Hyeongjun that you don’t know if you will ever be able to get enough of. “I hate you so much.” You breathe out, before pulling him in another kiss, the man laughing softly while kissing you back.
Hyeongjun pecks you a few more times, resting his forehead on your shoulder. “Please never be this stupid ever again, even if it’s not with me, I was serious about you deserving to be with someone that knows how to love you.” He finishes, resting his head on the seat to look at you.
“That’s not a problem anymore, though.” You start, earning a confused look from the older. “After all, you /do/ know how to love me.” You whisper in his ear, and the ways in which that single sentence made Hyeongjun feel couldn’t be described even by the most skilled poet.
Saying you broke him is an understatement because for the past two minutes he’s been looking at you with a dumbfounded expression and lips parted, blinking quickly and barely breathing. You smile fondly because no matter how hard he tries, at the end of the day, he’s still Hyeongjun, the guy who can only ask for extra sugar for you but never for himself.
You hold back a smile, pleased with yourself as the other pushes you away playfully, irritated at you suddenly having control, making you giggle. You peck his lips a couple times as an apology, making it impossible for the older to hold back his smile.
“I still need to take you home.” He rasps, thumbs caressing your spine.
“Or you could take me to your house.” You offer, Hyeongjun’s ears reddening once again, another laugh escaping your lips as you kiss his cheek, getting back in your seat. The older one looks at you with an expression that screams of you to please confirm it wasn’t a joke, so you tilt your head cutely raising your eyebrows. “What? Can’t I have a sleepover with my good friend?”
Hyeongjun’s nose twitches the way it always does when he’s secretly too excited or nervous, biting his bottom lip while smiling and starting the car, excitement barely hidden. You were hopefully hiding it better than he was, because your ex was long forgotten. The only thing on your mind now was the man next to you, because you finally felt like you were next to /a man/.
You didn’t know what you expected when you entered his apartment, but being pulled in a passionate kiss by your waist, was definitely not it. You smile, hands going into the taller’s hair, walking backwards until your back is resting against the kitchen tabletop. Hyeongjun whispers something about how you have no idea how long he’s been waiting for this, but you think you can get an idea from the way he leans over you, hugging your waist and helping you sit on the tabletop.
“Aren’t you scared I'll think you’re taking advantage of me?” You tease, but Hyeongjun’s eyes go wide, slightly pulling away terrified. You laugh softly, throwing your head back which results in you hitting it on a cabinet, whining as your hand rubs the spot, the man laughing at you now.
“See that’s what you get for trying to scare me.” He grins, gently rubbing your scalp, eyes soft against the snarky comment. You look up at him, hands holding onto the hems of his shirt, and suddenly your heart /hurts/. Before you knew it, your eyes filled up with tears, Hyeongjun’s eyes filled with worry instead.
“Hey, no- what-” He blinks, pulling you in a warm hug with a frown. He was never good at comforting, at least that’s what you’ve heard, because when you needed comfort, somehow he always knew what to do or say and he never seemed uncomfortable with vulnerability if it came to you.
You let a couple tears fall, before speaking up in a soft tone. “I’m really sorry.” Is all you manage to say between sobs.
Hyeongjun knew what for. He knew it was because of you taking so long to do something about your feelings, because you kept pouring your relationship problems on him, because you kept ignoring his advice, because you kept getting in trouble, because he had to fight for your love when he was most likely the only man on this earth actually deserving of it.
He knew because he was the only person to understand you well enough to not ask for explanations. It hurts to think how much you hurt him and how admittedly selfish you’ve been acting lately. You didn’t need a reply, you just wanted to apologize, but just when you were about to pull away from his embrace, three simple words left his lips that made you freeze in place.
Three words that Han Hyeongjun doesn’t say often, but when he does he truly means it. “I love you.” He whispers, caressing your back while still holding onto you.
You look up at him, lips forming into a pout before what was tearing up turns into full on crying. The taller pats your tears away with his sleeve, smiling softly with his eyes in a gentle gaze, kissing your forehead. “Let’s wash up and put on comfortable clothes, it’s late.” Hyeongjun offers, helping you down from the isle.
In a very Hyeongjun manner, he was about to simply walk away and prepare some clothes for you, but before he could leave, you pull on his sleeve weakly to make him look back, sniffling while letting out a shaky breath.
“I love you too…” You nod shortly, Hyeongjun’s lips curling into a pleased smile, before he playfully pokes your side, walking inside the bedroom. You smile to yourself, calming down before showering as your….friend?...maybe more? prepres you two some tea and food.
You were now sitting on the couch in the living room, watching tv while waiting for the tea to cool down and for Hyeongjun to come out of the shower. When he does, your mouth goes dry. You’ve been to the beach with him before, you’ve seen him freshly showered before, but seeing his damp hair while his underwear was peeking out of his gray sweatpants, white shirt going up just enough to show his happy trail when he reached for the top cabinet to pull out a fuzzy blanket for you two, your brain was left with heavy damage.
Hyeongjun doesn’t seem to notice, because he simply sits next to you on the couch, keeping some distance before wrapping the blanket around you two, grabbing his mug and tasting the tea quietly. You blink at him dumbfounded, eyes going back and forth between the cabinet he was at a few moments ago and his body on the couch with his legs crossed.
As if things weren’t already bad enough, because of the distraction, you drink too quickly from your tea to notice it’s still too hot, almost dropping the mug with a loud whine while cursing. The other’s head turns to you, instantly helping you set your mug on the table, grabbing a napkin to dab on the small amount that spilled.
“Are you okay?” The man asks amused, holding your jaw in his hand while looking over your burned tongue.
You nod because speaking right now wasn’t an option…for a multitude of reasons, and when you see him silently pondering without moving, you know nothing good could possibly come out of this. This was his scheming face. He is planning something, and you were so very scared of what that something was.
Next thing you know, his lips go on yours, tongue grazing over yours shortly, giving you a short kiss before pulling away. You choke on your own saliva, taken aback at the sudden act, blush spreading across your cheeks quickly, as Hyeongjun goes back to his spot, casually eating.
Your heart feels like it’s about to drop out of your chest, how the hell- how th-where did he even get the guts to do this type of thing from?? You look at him dumbfounded, unable to move, as the other tries (and fails) to hide his proud smirk.
You want to play like this, Han Hyeongjun? Alright, game on.
A while passes, both of you quietly watching tv while eating, when you notice the remote on the arm rest next to Hyeongjun. You smile to yourself, carefully scooting closer to the man and reaching for the remote, close to getting on his lap to reach for it instead of getting up.
You see the way Hyeongjun’s eyes travel to the curve of your body, blinking quickly before returning his attention to the tv. You mentally groan, because he was, in fact, very good at pretending to watch whatever was on the tv.
However, because you refused to let him win a game he started (knowingly or not), you complain about how you want to lay down to be more comfortable since you’re kind of tired, the both of you going into his bedroom.
Hyeongjun’s back was resting against the headboard, so after a while you excuse yourself and go to the bathroom so when you come back you can sit next to him, head on his shoulder. The older one holds back a smile, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, caressing your shoulder gently.
Your eyes travel down Hyeongjun’s body, seeing the way his shirt was slightly raised, and you wonder if he placed it like that or if it was just the universe trying to make you lose your mind. You advert your eyes from it back to the tv, when you feel a pair of eyes on you and when you look up at Hyeongjun, he was already looking at you.
“What?” You ask in a whisper, arm going around his waist.
Hyeongjun looks over your face with a small smile, tucking your hair under your ear, hand caressing your cheek. “Your eyes are puffy from crying.”
“I know…my head kinda hurts.” You groan embarrassed, closing your eyes tightly once before opening them. Your friend offers to get you a pill for the headache but you shake your head with a sneer. “I know something that will make me feel better.”
The other frowns, genuine confusion visible on his face, letting out a shy laugh when you pucker your lips cutely. He seems to consider it for a few seconds but eventually cups your cheek and kisses you softly.
You let out a happy noise, kissing him back while moving closer to him. It wasn’t a lie, because just a few seconds into kissing Hyeongjun, you couldn’t even remember the headache.
“Is the headache gone yet?” He whispers teasingly, teeth slightly pulling on your bottom lip, making you let out a shuddered breath.
“Not yet.” You breathe out, cupping his face and slowly getting on top of him, kissing him slowly as he brings you closer, arms wrapping around your waist.
Talking didn’t last too long, both of you were too busy focusing on the feeling of each other’s lips, trying to keep yourselves from making the kiss get too heated. Neither of you wanted it to get heated, really, but it’s hard not to let it happen when Hyeongjun’s hands slowly move on your ass and your hands find their way to his hair, brushing it back as you hug him closer and your tongue grazes over his lips.
Hyeongjun lets out a small moan and it might just be the best thing you’ve ever heard. One of your hands stays in his hair while the other travels down to his chest. When his hands lightly grab your ass to hold you closer, you let out a small gasp, grinding once on him.
“We should take it slow…” The man breathes out, eyes closing briefly before opening them again.
“Why?” You ask in a whisper, getting closer to him and pressing down on him, arms now wrapped around his neck, caressing his hair.
“It just- the right thing to do-” He shudders, licking his lips as his breaths get quicker and shorter.
“Why do we have to do the right thing?” You tilt your head, face dangerously close to him, grinding one more time. “Are you that scared of being a bad person Han Hyeongjun?” You whisper, holding his chin between your index and thumb.
“I don’t wanna take advantage of you…” He manages to get out, hands moving on your thighs.
You grind closer on him, hand then traveling down his chest then under his shirt, eyes locked with his. “Then let me take advantage of you.” You continue, pulling him closer by his necklace, his breath hitching as your nails gently drag over his skin when you kiss near his ear lobe, whispering “Since when were you this boring hm?”.
That seems to be everything Hyeongjun needed to say fuck it and instantly take off your shirt, kissing you hard while groaning. “‘m not boring.” He mumbles, pressing you more on him and all you can do is let out a small noise while kissing back, trying to take his shirt off too.
If there’s one thing Hyeongjun was, it's competitive, so the idea of him being as boring as your ex was enough to make him forget all about his almighty morals, because he had a point to prove. That’s why he wastes no time in turning you two around and taking your clothes off, knee between your legs as he marks your collarbones in places only he can see.
You let out breathy moans, hands cupping his jaw while grinding on his knee, smiling to yourself. Hyeongjun’s hand traces the side of your body, before wrapping one of your legs around his waist, pecking you a few times before pulling away.
“How do you want it?” He whispers, hand moving down your stomach as his pick necklace brushes against you while kissing your earlobe. You know he probably didn’t think much of it other than making sure he makes you feel good but that single question absolutely broke any and every ability to properly think you had inside you.
You blink at him with parted lips, a shaky breath escaping your lips when his eyes meet yours. Hyeongjun was a man of actions rather than words, so you decide to reply by grabbing his hair and pulling him in a needy and passionate slow kiss. The older grunts in the kiss, hand moving at the same pace, soft moans escaping your lips and you really don’t know if you can handle more of this.
As he positions himself, he looks at you one for one last confirmation so you smile nodding, leaving a soft peck on his lips before holding him closer and when his thrusts match the kissing before, you are pretty sure you’re about to pass out.
He was everything you ever thought of needing. It’s as if somehow he knew exactly how to move and what to do, kissing your jaw and neck while thrusting slowly, each thrust getting harder, making it impossible for you to think about anyone or anything else that wasn’t him. Soft moans of his name leave your lips and that only encourages him to thrust deeper, your back arching at the feeling.
Knowing you’re the one making Hyeongjun let out small moans and heavy breaths while his lips stay parted in pleasure, felt euphoric. It was a type of feeling you’ve never experienced before and it felt intoxicating.
And because he was still Hyeongjun, your good friend, at some point the hand that isn’t holding your waist moves to grab yours, interlocking his fingers with yours to brush his thumb against your knuckles. He rests his forehead on yours and you look up at him smiling happily, earning a small chuckle from the taller before he kisses your forehead and thrusts faster.
You hold onto him, room filled with heavy pants and small whines, and when his hand presses on your stomach all you can think of is how embarrassingly much you love him, and how stupid you were for being scared of your feelings and his possible reaction for as long as you have.
Hyeongjun mumbles something along the lines of “you’re so beautiful” and you feel like crying. You don’t think you’ve ever felt as wanted as you do at this very moment, and you can only drag your nails on his back while repeating his name louder with each thrust when he hits your spot.
Your hands lightly pull on his hair, earning a louder than before noise from the older, making you slightly giggle. However, those giggles quickly die down and get replaced by loud whines when Hyeongjun raises an eyebrow at you, altering to a faster pace, your head throwing back.
You slap his arm playfully calling him an asshole, earning an amused breathy laugh from the man before he slows down again, thrusting slower and harder, apologizing by pecking you softly a couple times, nose scrunched up slightly from smiling. He was beautiful, and when he hugs your lower back with both arms to hold you closer and thrust deeper while moaning your name, you let out one last loud whine before cumming, quickly followed by him.
Hyeongjun’s body falls on yours tiredly, and you hug his neck lovingly, not wanting to let go. After a few seconds he looks up at you, still trying to catch his breath with his chin on your chest.
“You look really pretty…” You whisper admiring his rosy cheeks and messy hair, as the other mumbles something, hiding his face in your neck, only making you smile harder. Hyeongjun kisses your shoulder and the marks on your collarbones faintly, before pulling away and cleaning you two up.
And because it was Hyeongjun, you both had to shower again and change the sheets so he could sleep with a clean consciousness. The difference between sleeping over now and other times though was that as he was waiting on the bed after changing the sheets, you were no longer anxious about sleeping next to him in case you got the urge to kiss him.
So now, because things were different, you walk into the bedroom wearing only your underwear and one of his band shirts and you can physically see the exact moment when Hyeongjun’s brain stops working. He looks at you with parted lips and a dumbfounded gaze, breathing out a “woah…” as you sit next to him.
You know you two need to properly talk, but you don’t really want to ruin the moment so instead, you opt for figuring out what is off the table by yourself. You start with getting under the blanket and moving closer to him, being pleasantly surprised when the older opens his arm for you to snuggle closer to him, so you do.
You wrap your arms around his waist, looking up at him lovingly, because even though you’ve always loved Han Hyeongjun, right now, after all of that…he looked different. He looked glowier, prettier, /happier/. He looked breathtaking.
“You’re being weird…” He whispers with a smile, nose brushing with yours. You mock him playfully and simply bring your hand to his cheek to caress it while poking your tongue out. “So weird…” He sighs, shaking his head, unable to hide his smile.
“You love me.” You nod determinately, making the older’s nose slightly twitch in embarrassment, ears red.
“Now you’re just using it against me…that’s not very nice.” He says matter of factly, laying next to you completely and pulling you half on top of him, holding you close. “I don’t like you, you’re mean.” He continues, words heavily contradicting his actions, especially the way he slowly rubs your back from under the shirt.
Feeling his hand under your shirt you widen your eyes, about to say something but Heongjun beats you to it and starts gently scratching it while rolling his eyes with a smile, because he /knew/ you. You hum pleased, hugging him closer with your head resting on his chest, feeling that sense of closeness and happiness you’ve been trying to find for the longest time.
You look over his face for a moment before pulling him in a soft kiss, the oher’s free arm instantly wrapping around your waist, hugging you closer. Now, the kiss started slow and soft, but the fact that you’ve both been repressing your feelings and how attracted you were to each other for about a year, might or might have not resulted in you clinging onto Hyeongjun as his fingers were moving against your clit.
Once again, you’d like to blame Hyeongjun for looking as good as he does in his afterglow. What else were you supposed to do other than let him know just how good he looks? He didn’t mind it either, because although he’d never admit it out loud, his chest was feeling with pride at the idea of being so attractive to you that you couldn’t get enough of him.
He was a simple man, all he ever wanted was to be loved by you and love you, and now that he finally had the green light to do so in a way that would make you forget any man’s face or voice that wasn’t him, because why wouldn’t he?
You blink at the older tiredly, eyes barely staying open as he cleans you up again, kissing your face softly and repeating that you should get some rest but how could you when sleeping means not getting to look at him?
You shake your head and stubbornly fight it out, instead sitting up and putting on one of his zip up hoodies over your tshirt and some pants, suggesting you go to the balcony for a bit for some fresh air. The older one gives you a concerned look but agrees despite reminding you how late it is, because he was, in fact, very serious about doing whatever makes you happy.
That’s why you were sitting on Hyeongjun’s lap bridal style on the futon of the balcony with a blanket draped over you two while looking at the sky, your head on his shoulder. Playing with the hoodie he put on while having his arms around you felt peaceful. You look back at the guitarist, admiring his features and you finally feel like you’re home.
“You’re being weird again…” Hyeongjun teases with a small smile, looking at the sky.
“We have to talk, you know?” You remind him softly, tucking his hair behind his ear and caressing his jaw, the older finally turning his head to look at you with a small nod as he gets more comfortable and holds you closer to him.
“I think I said everything, though?” He tilts his head genuinely confused, making you smile slightly. “You already know I tried to break you two up because I didn’t like how he treated you and because you deserved better….what else…” He scrunches his brows, looking at the sky briefly, searching in his mind before finishing off with “And you know I love you and am willing to do whatever you want me to.” He answers honestly. “What else is there to say?”
You look over his face with your lips parted, feeling your heart beating faster than humanly possible, and you really don’t know if you’ll ever get used to having Hyeongjun speak so clearly about his feelings for you. “I love you too but I don't mean in a-”
“I don’t either. I love you.” He repeats determinately, because he somehow knew you needed a clarification that this wasn’t just as friends. And when that clarification is given, it feels like the biggest stone that was weighing you down finally got taken off your chest. You smile gratefully, hands caressing the sides of his neck and kissing him lovingly a couple times, before pulling away and snuggling closer to him.
“What now?” You ask, voice slightly insecure.
“You tell me, your needs come before mine.” He answers and you’re convinced he did not intend for it to sound as romantic as it did, but it /did/.
“Since when were you so romantic Han Hyeongjunnnnn????” You grin teasingly, making the other scoff playfully, looking to the side before you turn his head with your hand, making him look at you. “I’ve wanted to be with you before I wanted to be with anyone else.” You explain, earning a shocked cough from the older.
“Wh-wha-since when?” The man chokes on his own saliva, not believing the words that came out of your mouth.
You consider lying to save yourself the embarrassment and say two days ago but he deserves better, so you duck your head down with your lips forming a straight line and say “A year ago…that night when you had your first gig and we had to rush to that guitar store before the show started because your high e string broke when you were tuning and since you were too excited you forgot to get an extra set.” You smile, the guitarist frowning confused.
“How did that make you fall for me??” He asks amazed, making you smile more, straightening a few of his messy hairs while talking.
“You asked me to come with you for emotional support and I thought, ah he really needs me in his life.” You say endeared, caressing the side of his neck and looking into his eyes. “And I think it was the first time I saw you that stressed…You looked really cute.” You explain, the other scoffing with a small smile.
“So my pain is your happiness, huh?” He tsks, shaking his head playfully. Hyeongjun was going to stay quiet but seeing your expecting eyes for his own story, he groans embarrassed before speaking. “The first time I hugged you…” He mumbles, and you cover your mouth with wide eyes, trying to hold in a laugh.
“The fi-that was…a year ago…like a month into knowing each other??” You remind him, surprised, the older nodding, ears red.
“I was like…ah…what am I doing…I’ve only known this person for a month why am I hugging her like this…” He grimaces, and you can’t help but laugh because Han Hyeongjun is truly the most endearing person you have ever met. “And then when I hugged you the next time for confirmation I knew I wanted to be around you more than around others and I didn’t mind physical contact if it was with you and yeah…”
You look over his face amused, before squishing his face with a wide grin, forehead resting on his. “You’re so stupid ohmygod…I thought you didn’t…Han Hyeongjun why wouldn’t you make a move?!” You whine but before he could reply you start kissing him lovingly to make up for the lost time.
The man mutters a “You could’ve made a move too” before wrapping his arms around your waist tighter and kissing back, only pulling away when you were both out of breath. You look at him happily, pecking him every two seconds, playing with his hair.
“I don’t want you to feel like you need to rush into anything, okay? We can just take it slow.” He reassures you softly.
“I don’t really need it, I was only dating people to get over you but I totally understand if you don’t think you can handle having such a sexy girlfriend yet and need some time to prepare.” You nod quickly, making the other raise his eyebrow.
“Yeah, what about you having such an attractive boyfriend? Are you sure you can handle the fans?” He quirks an eyebrow up, making you hold back a giggle.
“Mm I think I can handle your ten fans, five of which are your band mates.” You smile evilly, the other pinching your sides playfully offended with a laugh. “But yeah, I know what you mean, we can go on a couple dates first, make sure we don’t want to rip each other’s faces off because one of us likes white whine and the other red or something.” You hum, hugging him. “I’m just happy I get to be with you.”
Hyeongjun’s eyes tell you he shares the same feeling, although he doesn’t say it out loud. After all, he doesn’t have to because you know. You know because he shows it.
You two stayed quiet for a while, until you remembered something you’ve been wondering for months. “The strap incident was on you, wasn’t it.” You whisper after a few seconds, hearing the other let out a wholehearted laugh.
“Hey, I told him to get you a strap as a valentine’s day gift cuz you’ve been wanting a new one for a while! Him not making the connection that it’s for a guitar isn’t on me!! He /knew/ you started playing!” He defends himself innocently, but you look at him unimpressed, smiling.
“Oh so you conveniently left out the most crucial part, huh?” You raise an eyebrow, pushing him slightly with a grin. “You’re an asshole, I had to explain myself that I don’t even know how to peg someone-” You mumble, the older one laughing even harder.
“Mm nope, don’t blame it on me. All I did was be a good person and give him ideas.” He smiles proudly, remaining silent for a second before looking at you with a mischievous grin. “But did you keep it?”
“DID I- HAN HEYONGUN!” You gasp yelling, rushing after him inside the house when he gets up, getting away from you before you can hit him. “I WILL SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS, ASSHOLE!” You laugh, giggling with a whine when he wraps his arms around you, dragging you on the bed and kissing you when you find him in the bedroom.
You try to squirm away laughing, only to be held closer by the taller, who kept kissing your cheek and lips until you forgot why you were even running after him, now hugging his neck, snuggling into him.
Hyeongjun kisses your forehead one last time, before putting the blanket over you two, hugging you tightly enough to make sure that if this is a dream, he would at least make it last for as long as possible.
Next morning, Hyeongjun wakes up with a groan as something almost pushes him off the bed and when he opens his eyes, he feels like crying of happiness. Stupidly enough, seeing you sound asleep while wearing his shirt, a confirmation that the events of last night weren’t part of a dream, caused tears to build up in his eyes.
For once, Hyeongjun lets himself tear up, and lets himself truly /feel/. He lets his emotions take control for once as he smiles at the way you mumble something about a walking ice cream in your sleep, chuckling endearingly.
When you frown slowly waking up, that’s when Hyeongjun quickly wipes his tears with a sniffle, pretending to sleep with his back to you when you open your eyes. You look at him smiling, unaware of what just happened and simply get closer to him, kissing his cheek before getting up and preparing coffee for the both of you, because you truly and wholeheartedly love Hyeongjun
Things finally fell into place. Maybe it took longer than it should have, or maybe it took just the right amount of time, but the one thing you’re sure of is that this time, you know you’re loved in the purest form.
It’s not even like you have time to question or doubt it, because Hyeongjun comes out of his room wearing a hoodie and holding another one in his hand, putting it over your shoulders as he kisses your cheek once, asking if you want breakfast. And when you nod, he quietly starts making your favorite type of pancakes.
Because Hyeongjun truly, and wholeheartedly loves you too.
What kind of aftercare do you think each xdh member appreciates most?
nsvxjssbusjdh anon i hope you know that this ask made me lose my mind aaaahhhh
[Aftercare with Xdinary Heroes]
i feel like gunil would be so worried about everything after sex. his #1 priority is making sure that you're alright and that all your needs are being met. he would be scrambling around, doing anything and everything to make you comfortable, fussing over you. you're thristy? water's already on the table beside your bed. you're hungry? he's ordering take-out, even paying extra to make sure it gets here quicker. anything you want, it's yours. you might actually have to calm him down, assuring that you're alright and everything is fine. then he's trapping you in his arms, like he's never going to let you go(he probably isn't)
jungsu loves peppering you with soft kisses everywhere. on your nose, your arms, you stomach, legs, everywhere. he would pout at the marks and bruises he accidentally left on you because he doesn't realise his own strength sometimes, before kissing them softly too. "it's so they heal faster", he tells you with a grin. you would always have soft makeout sessions every five minutes because the love he has for you is overwhelming him and he can’t help himself. if you don't kiss him back or tell him teasingly that it's enough, he would have the biggest pout on his face and how are you supposed to resist that? he'd also smile in every kiss.
jiseok would be quiet after sex, content to just lay there and bask in your presence. his hands would trace little hearts on your skin and his eyes would follow you everywhere. he just needs you near him and he would have the biggest heart eyes at you at all times. a little giggle would also slip out of him every ten minutes or so and he'd squeeze your hand/arm/waist, burying his head into your neck everytime it does. he's just so happy being with you.
seungmin would get really shy after sex. it doesn’t matter if it's your first time together or the tenth, he would be blushing everytime and he would have this massive smile on his face. he'd check if you're okay in a soft shy voice and when you say that you are and how much you love him, he'd melt, squealing inside. he'd also tell you he loves you at least five thousand times not because he doesn't think you don't know but because he needs to say it out loud or he might actually melt. and when you say it back? congrats now you have him laying over you like a weighted blanket because he actually did melt.
contrary to popular belief, i feel like hyeongjun would actually be very talkative after sex. he can talk a lot when he's comfortable and he wants to tell you about every single part of his life. the two of you would talk about everything that comes to your mind ranging from the mundane to serious talks about your future to just joking around. hyeongjun loves your midnight, after sex talk sessions because he feels that both you and him are at your most natural at that time.
i already said all of this in my ask to dinna but i'm saying it again because i can't stop talking about joo. jooyeon would be his softest after sex. he'd need to be touching you at all times, because he needs to make sure that you're real and you're his. he'd also be so giggly after sex and he loves pillow talk too. he also loves seeing you in his clothes, especially after sex, and if you do wear them, he melts. the cute, toothy grin of his is never leaving his face as he clings to you like a koala.
