First time requesting hello! :] hope you do well! May I ask for some Twisted Wonderland First Years (Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel, Ortho, Sebek) (Ortho only platonic ofc (and Grim as well, we love a supportive glutton friend cat), the rest can be romantic, thats up to u!) x Trans Man!reader? :] in a form of headcanons? (But if u feel like writing a fic more, hell yeah, go for it! :])
U can write anything, but if u need some idea, I thought of the reader (can be Yuu) finally saying that they're trans at their freshmen sleepover in Ramshackle, more as a "didnt i tell you that before?" "No???" "Oh. Lol." kinda funny fluff bonding moment and maybe some implications that the guys have a crush on them and will do their research to understand, asking around, asking their friends, the reader and help w their struggles :]
I'm sorry if this is too much and if u decide not to do that, its ok, i hope u have a good day! :]
Sure thing! This took me forever, I am so sorry. Also sorry for not including Grimm or Ortho, I am not good with their characterization and I wanted to get this out before it rotted in my drafts forever.
Dates worked: 04/30/26, 05/04/26, 5/11/26, 5/14/26, 5/17/26 (I just wanted to get an estimate on the time it takes me to write these on average)
Content (Warnings?): Freshmen x Trans Male Reader, implied transphobia, idiots in love, non-specified body type, mentions of boobies tho, Reader binds and no other surgeries or lacketherof specified, Internalized Misogyny (Epel), Internalized Transphobia (Reader and Epel), T*mblr (Ace and Deuce), Swearing, the freshmen aren't just “idiots” but they have depth, I was watching a deep-dive on the psychology of Frankenstein and why people like being sad while writing Sebek's part, Being Transgender as Divine Creation (Sebek)
FEM-ALIGNED DNI!
The Freshmen groupchat lit up with texts, all about the sleepover at Ramshackle and their inevitable appearance.
Reader stood in front of the mirror, smiling at his reflection. It was void of life or actual mirth, still grappling with his reality. He believed everyone knew he was trans, simply accepting his masculinity and not questioning it, even encouraging it on some instances. Rarely was his masculinity questioned, but that was mostly Epel teasing or genuine interest from Ace, Jack, or Sebek.
His fingers touched his face, poking and prodding to make it look different in the mirror. Reader's hands move to his neck, rubbing there and feeling the bone beneath before going to his ribcage, prodding at his chest. He would decide to go binderless from the get-go, seeing as he would need to change out of it anyway.
His hands grab either side, pulling his chest to flat and thinking for a moment if he could just rip them off, the scars healing in an instant beneath his touch and his body becoming something worth his title of man.
His mind is snapped out of it when he hears yelling downstairs and banging on his door. Then, he hears his friends pouring into the dorm.
With practiced ease, Reader regains his composure and looks like nothing was awry in his mind. Besides, he'll be with his friends who support him and love him for the man he is.
He steps downstairs to greet his friends, but met with a mix of shocked, indifferent, and surprised faces.
"What...?"
Ace Trappola
One of the densest motherfuckers on the planet. When he heard you question his and the others' expressions, his mind was thrown into flashbacks of you and rethinking everything.
That is until after he shouts:
"Dude! You've got a chick's body!"
Everyone glares at him and Deuce gives him a good slap to the back of the head. Whispering, "Dude, you can't just say that!"
"Uhh... I thought I told yall. Whoops," Reader shrugged. There goes his bathroom existential crisis.
"No. No you didn't. I feel like this is important information to our relation- I mean- friendship!"
Ace felt personally attacked, coming up to Reader and making a scene. Everyone else already accepted it and kinda moved on to raiding Reader's cabinets and setting up their shit in his bedroom.
"Whoops. Sorry."
The night went on as normal, except Ace was just dazed and confused. He watched him like a stalker the whole night, studying Reader's mannerisms and trying to see if the boobs were fake. Nope, definitely real. Or super-glued on really well.
Slowly, he warms up again and goes back to normal throughout the night.
But while everyone is asleep, and Ace is beside Reeder, his eyes are glued to his sleeping face. He begins to imagine ways to win Reader over with this newfound information.
"Hey...!" he whispers, shaking Reader's shoulder gently.
He wakes from his sleep, groaning with mild irritation.
"What in the hell do you want from me?"
"Spoon me."
"Go to bed."
Nevertheless, Reader's arms encircle his friends, pushing his back to his chest. He was much too tired to object or question his relationship with Ace.
Ace, on the other hand, felt that it would make Reader feel manly to spoon him, like a fucking weirdo. It worked, but it was weird.
When Ace got back to his dorm the next day, he kept researching ways to make trans men feel more masculine and whatever. He ended up on forcemasc tumblr.
After that, he became more open and flirty, though with a more masculine undertone. It was to affirm Reader's gender, but was more awkward than anything. Hearing the words "pretty boy" now give Reader PTSD. Still, Ace is lovable and his intentions are in the right place. Mostly.
Ace's awkward flirting and general mischevious nature was endearing, at least.
Deuce Spade
Oh.... OH!
He didn't quite get the hint when Reader came downstairs. But when he did, he realized very quickly how kinda hot it is.
Like, not in a weird fetish way, but the fact that Reader was a self-made man and was so manly that no one questioned why he was chosen to be at NRC (aka kidnapped via horsedrawn carriage from another world), a notoriously all-boys school. It was more manly than something he thinks even Jack could achieve.
So, that night he began talking with Reader about the whole situation.
Reader left the room to grab some water before bed, and Deuce excused himself shortly after to talk with him.
"Hey, man," Deuce began before leaning on the counter next to Reader.
The tap was cut off as Reader grabbed his mug, taking a sip before responding.
"Sup. What'cha need?"
"You never told me about..."
There was a small silence before Reader shrugged.
"Honestly, I thought I told all of you. but I guess not. Whoops."
"You didn't... but thanks for trusting us, I guess."
It was oddly sweet how Deuce was grateful for Reader telling him this despite it being something so casual for Reader now. It made him feel better about being trans, made his transness feel like something special.
Without a thought, Reader reached out and hugged Deuce, arms wrapping gently around his waist.
"No, thank you."
So, pretty much after that interaction, Deuce is whipped as fuck.
Bro researches so much about being trans just for Reader, making sure he can do whatever it takes for him. Twisted Wonderland is much more accepting than Reader's world, but Twisted Wonderland still has statistical delinquency and homeless rates that are higher for trans youth.
Needless to say, Deuce doesn't want Reader to be like him, finding any way to provent him from turning to delinquency from loneliness or lack of acceptance.
Also ends up on forcemasc tumblr btw.
Jack Howl
The most respectful man literally ever.
"Well, it's just a surprise," he admits to Reader later after he confronted Jack about the situation, thinking to address the most sensible person in the room.
"I thought I told yall," Reader admitted, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. It was more comfortable than standing and it was late.
"You didn't..."
There was an awkward pause before Reader just shrugged.
"Oh, well. I was born a girl, now I'm a dude. You don't have a problem with it." It was less of a question than it was a statement.
It wasn't just confidence, but a silent acknowledgement of boundaries. If Jack or anyone had a problem, they were not going to be his friend.
Everyone in the room overheard and silently acknowledged the boundary. No questions about it, Reader is a boy and will be treated as such.
Jack imply watched Reader, noting the way he carried himself with respect and confidence. It was attractive. Like, really attractive.
If Jack were to date someone, it would be long-term and healthy. He knew his worth, and his partner knowing their worth was important.
All Jack could do was admire Reader as they tiredly smirked at him, talking to him... Wait, talking to him. Oh, shit he wasn't listening, just staring.
"-So, yeah. I guess i'll grab the snacks and shit. Mind helping me?"
"Yes. I mean- I'll help you."
His tail was wagging so fast, Reader could feel the air wafting around like a fan.
Reader already had his respect, this interaction only heightened his respect for him, hoping to learn more about Reader and gain his respect back or at least help him.
Another that researches, but mostly on gender affirming care and actions. He already knew about trans people and such because he is quite intelligent and could gather some hints early on in Reader's kidnapping to Twisted Wonderland.
So, he starts asking Reader to hang out with him more to do "boy" stuff. He already did, trying to gain his affection, but he'll just do it more often.
Of course, he has to invite him to workout together, telling him which excercises emphasize which features and what diets will help him achieve the goals he wants while also maintaining a healthy mindset towards gender. This manly-man of man is over here wagging his tail at how manly Reader is and that he helped him better himself.
Over time, Reader becomes more happy, much healthier, more alive. iIt's honestly beautiful, Jack sees Reader as more of a man than himself for being self-made in every way. But confessing his feelings? Scary as fuck, even though he knows it's unhealthy to bottle up his emotions.
Epel Felmier
I headcannon him as trans btw.
Anyways, he's immediately shocked. Not from the fact that Reader was born a girl, but the fact that Reader passes for a man better than he does. Well, not exactly shocked, just jealous. And impressed.
"Hey, Reader," he calls out from the kitchen's opening. Reader was just grabbing snacks to set out or everyone while they talked and such.
"Yeah, Epel?" Reader responded, turning to him. He had a bowl of popcorn in one hand and a tray of whatever else in the other.
When Reader said his name, he flushed. He didn't know why, it's just his name. There was no need to say it, but Reader said it anyways. He said it so nicely, in a way he wanted to hear for the rest of his life.
"Uh- could I talk to ya? Y'know, in private?" Epel couldn't believe he was doing this.
"Yeah, gimme a sec to put out the snacks and we can talk in my room."
The next thing Epel knew, he was sitting on Reader's bed with Reader right beside him.
"So," Epel began, taking in a deep breath before blurting "I'm trans, too. And- and I don't get it. I don't get how everyone just knows you're a boy! This ain't fair, y'know?"
He was upset. Upset that he was cursed to always look like a girl no matter what he did. He was brash and boyish, constantly displaying his masculinity only for it to be infantilized and dumbed-down to nothing more than over compensation. It was infuriating. and for him to just now find out Reader is trans only stung more. He loved him, truly, but this felt like somewhat of a betrayal even though he knew Reader did not owe him anything and he should be happy that the guy he loved passed as his authentic self.
"Epel," Reader began, a frown forming on his face to match Epel's own. "I get it. It's not fair. To be fair, I never saw you as a girl and was actually surprised when you said that. But I want you to know that I'll always be here for you. I know what it's like, so why not talk with me?"
And Reader was kind, too? Epel must've fallen for a saint.
He reached out and hugged Reader tightly, getting snot and tears on Reader's nightshirt. Honestly, Reader couldn't find it in himself to care and just embraced him back, happy to find some kind of kinship with him.
How Epel processes this is different. He tries to impress Reader withgrandiose and masculine displays, kinda like a bird flashing his tail feathers.
He doesn't need to research much, but he does try to find what makes Reader feel more masculine by using his own experience.
After the sleepover, he only gets bolder and more physically affectionate to Reader, hoping he'll get the hint. One of these bitches has to man up and confess and it will probably have to be Epel depending on how Reader is.
Sebek Zigvolt
"WHAT!? HOW...? HOW DID I NOT FIGURE THIS OUT?"
"I swear I thought I told yall."
That was reader's only defense: That he thought he told them.
"NO."
"Oh... Well, I'm transgender."
It's left at that for the entire night. Sebek is somewhat familiar with this idea, just confused that it had to be someone so not-obvious. But this is also a school with the cuntiest men ever, so there's really no gender expectations unless you're Epel.
Sebek approaches Reader the next morning, a slight flush on his cheeks because of the personable topic and the closeness it would ilicit.
Most others have left, called to action by their Housewardens or personal affairs. But Sebek stayed behind, called to this action by Lilia's imposition of his need for contact outside of his small circle. Also because Lilia knew of his crush on Reader and this was with perfect opportunity to get closer.
"Human," Sebek called after Reader. Reader was tiredly walking barefoot to the kitchen to make himself coffee.
Without thinking, Sebek grabbed onto Reader's wrist. This set his face alight with red, pulling back almost immediately despite the lack of protest from the prefect.
"Yes, Sebek?" He questioned, now more awake and concerned for his friend.
"Uh- ahem, I wish to speak on your announcement from last night. I am here to say that you have my support and respect of your endeavors."
"Oh," Reader responded, dumbfounded at such a... vulnerable (?) display from Sebek. Though, this confusion is replaced by concern and amusement at the rouge falling upon Sebek's cheeks and ears.
"Well, I cherish your support," Reader replied, placing a hesitant hand to Sebek's shoulder. "Thank you."
This interaction triggered a fervent want and need for Reader's approval. This is quite similar to his desire for approval from Malleus, though not from the want to be Reader's perfect retainer and knight, but to be his perfect lover.
How lowly, he thought, to be vying for a human's affections.
He does not see Reader differently, only putting together the pieces of past interactions and justifying some behaviors he has. He also does more research on the human stigma of gender and gender expression and contrasts it to the perception of gender from fae. After the war, he remembers Lilia explaining, some human ideas of gender and the imposition of colonial ideals were imposed upon fae and changed some of the culture surrounding gender and their roles. It was a very insightful lesson on the effects of war on the subjugated people that allowed Sebek to view Reader's gender as a divine act of creation and bravery.
In summation, he's even more whipped than before.
My requests are open btw! I have a lot of fandoms I write for, and some may not be listed but go for it if you think i might be a part of it.
Hi Chana! I tried to make a mood board for All You See Is Blue. It’s the first I’ve ever made, but I hope you like it! :) (Just a heads up, I’ve taken all the pictures from Pinterest. The images are not mine. The credit goes to the owner.)
WHAT??? WHAT??????? AFJSDOFJLSDJF THIS IS BEAUTIFUL I LITERALLY GASPED WHEN I SAW THIS IN MY INBOX THE WINE THE CASTLE THE PASTRIES THE LIBRARY THE GIRL LOOKING AT THE SKY THE MF FOUNTAINNNN JUNGKOOK IN HIS ROYAL OUTFIT 🥵🥵🥵 (YOU LITERALLY GOT IT DOWN TO THE LAST DETAIL) IT’S SO PERFECT!!!! OH GOD I’M GONNA CRY AGH I LOVE IT SO MUCH THANK YOU 😭😭😭
gonna put this as the new banner for the fic ✈️ i cannot believe this is your first mood board wtf it’s literally so good i’m obsessed 🥺🥺🥺
(´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡ oh my god so I saw a few asks telling u how sad Just A Star was and, I like that kind of plot where someone dies or something but DAMN, Just A Star deserves an award for making me pause nine times to process the entire plot and it made me cry when she told Jaemin she basically didn't want to see him but he insisted timidly despite so, then again when she told him she'd never experience all the sappy firsts like prom, her first kiss, first love and first heartbreak AND HE GAVE IT TO HER DAMN IT, then I cried again one last time when she finally told him she was dying, WHAT THE HELL. I LIVE FOR THIS KIND OF TEEN ANGST 😭😭😭 side note, i didn't know that this blog was run by two admins, but I only know Joyce, but it said admin doie so I'll say it: ADMIN DOIE, YOU DESERVE A GODDAMN AWARD FOR JUST A STAR, HOLY FCKIN CRAP..
hihi woobear, i want to first clarify that i, joyce, am author doie HAHAHA i went under an alias first before i revealed my name when the second admin, author xuxi, left. :) so this blog currently only has one admin aka me HAHAHA ik a lot of older followers know me as author doie, and the older works have it signed with the alias. haha regardless, you can call me either name idc
but n e ways, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING JUST A STAR !! that’s like the peak of my writing abilities and storytelling... i have yet to write something as good as that. MY LITTLE PRIZED POSESSION !! thank you for giving so much love for it <3 also 9 times?????? LSKJDJ N I N E !!??
Synopsis: Sun Wukong realizes his feelings for Reader. He also realizes that he'd never fallen in love before and that he has no clue what to really do in this situation, especially since Reader is a man and where Sun Wukong was raised homosexuality is dismissed as perversion and obsession.
!!FEM-ALIGNED DNI!!
A/N I love soulmates AUs and thought of making this into one, but decided against it. It is lovely to imagine a world where there is one destined person to fall for you, but I'd rather this be natural. Loving someone just because is much more soulful to me. Anyways, the title's wording is on purpose. Despite what orientalism would tell you, gay people were not accepted in Ancient China, especially in the Ming and Qing Dynasty. JTTW was written in the Ming Dynasty by Wu Cheng'en, so I believe this notion would fit with the period in which Sun Wukong would've spent his formative years. The title is an allusion to the Emperor Ai of Han who cut his sleeve off because he did not want to disturb his sleeping lover who was a man. Mizi Xia was a semi-legendary figure from the Zhou Dynasty, far before Ming, and was the companion of Duke Ling of Wei. Mizi Xia was revered for his piety and beauty by the Duke. He even offered him a bitten peach as a gift to taste its sweetness. Once his looks faded, the Duke turned against him and told him that such a gift was demeaning. Despite the power of the homosexual figureheads, homosexuality among men as consumption was seen as perverse, corrupt, something to be reincarnated out of through piety, and often looked down on in literature and such media. To preface, I am not Chinese, I am Puerto Rican and want to give this culture justice through my writing and representation of such societies and cultures. If I did something wrong, please tell me.
Content (Warnings?): Sun Wukong x Male Reader, ooc Wukong since creator says Wukong seems aroace, Internalized Homophobia, Trauma, Wukong is Emotionally Constipated, Wukong is afraid of Commitment, Wukong is Lonely, Wukong is Touch-Starved, Reader has Cannon-Typical Trauma and scarring, Descriptions of Violence, Swearing, Religious themes, technically cuddling
Mortals.
Mortals were, in all sense of the word, bemusing. They were all made of love, yet not all loved or wished to love. There is an “or” because those who wish not to love fall harder than a body from the balcony of a shitty apartment. They do it over and over, reincarnating with the same heart and soul that yearns for death rather than love because the former is a much quicker pain.
Wukong felt neither inexplicably soul-crushing self-realizing lack of love nor overwhelmingly disgusting love that drove mindless and staggering suicide. He didn't even feel a kind of sick purgatory between the two. Though, given those two options, neither was heaven, making a purgatory much more bearable than either.
Even with this truth of his predicament, Wukong felt this hold upon his chest by this unknown hand. For hundreds of years, he felt these hands that grabbed and squeezed at his insides. They sweetly caressed his face as they cracked his ribs oh so tenderly to reach his heart and lungs. They sowed themselves like seeds in his body and mind, the flesh they touched intrinsically knowing this feeling and expecting this harsh touch.
Wukong felt it much harder recently. Much, much harder.
Reader was a man. A man with this hold on Wukong's heart that felt like those invisible hands. They were Reader's hands, he learned. The callouses, scars, and roughness of those hands being the same of that which reached into Wukong's lungs to force him to breathe them in.to his esophagus. It was sickening.
This man that held his heart in those rough hands was the wearer of a cut sleeve, a perversion to mankind and destined to rot and die like cattle. Though, MK and Mei seemed to oddly not care about this obvious provocation. Even Tang and Pigsy seemed to allow this stain upon their acquaintance.
It baffled Wukong; mankind's fluctuation of culture and acceptance was arbitrary.
Wukong had seen comrades die again and again. Humans died. Humans faded to dust. He had seen for himself the carnage of battle and bloodshed turn the bloodied and desolate fields change to the green lands and hills on which children play. It was funny, but only he found such humor and did not laugh once at that particular thought.
The Shame Temple in which Sun Wukong resides is a far trek, but worth it for Reader. Oh, how kind and gentle a man may be? After destruction and death before his own eyes, he smiles with gentility. Reader's finger flex as he grips the cloth bag clutched in his scarred fist.
What shuffles in the bag are peaches, fresh from the peach tree sitting atop a hill by his home. Reader's shirt sleeve is cut off from a previous battle. He would rather not waste a perfectly functional shirt and wore it still, aware of its odd asymmetry. It did not matter, especially when his company was brought as a confidant and friend. Something about those words and their connotations of platonic feelings ate away at Reader's heart.
Wukong had been avoidant of any attachment, burden, or otherwise closeness for so long. loneliness does that to a person; makes them avoid ever feeling lonely again by making sure that there is nothing to lose. He would rather not lose Reader. Even so, he avoids him like the plague and nearly cuts him from his life to avoid being hurt.
An immortal being with no end in sight is often a mortal thought, Wukong is aware. It's also his thought. He is the immortal being with no end in sight, an existential burden of bearing the heavens upon ones shoulders and shouldering that weight until the heavens themselves collapse into nothing along with everything he loved. Something mortals say; Dream of Endless and Hob meet in a tavern every 100 years to discuss Hobs' gift of immortality from Death. Wukong sometimes wished to be this “Hobs”.
The trail to the temple was foreboding and long, but Reader persevered. he goes to the temple and knocks upon the wood. It cracks the air with its loud and abruptness within the cave. Reader steps back, allowing Wukong to step out upon the porch and greet his companion.
The smile the Monkey King held faded after a moment, unsure for once in his cocky life. He was perverse and hedonistic; Wukong disappointed even himself.
“Good morning, Wukong,” Reader greets while holding out the cloth bag of peaches. “I picked these this morning. I wanted to give them to you since I know you love them.”
Wukong eagerly takes the peaches, smirking at his confidant. He holds the peaches to his chest with playful reverence before looking upon the gifter. “You know me quite well, bud,” he jokes. Of course Wukong adores peaches, it's a fact that may as well be written in stone. “Come on in. I've been bored all day.”
Reader knew Wukong long enough to know how he was, operated upon his arrival. He steps in, thanking Wukong. It was near-silent, only small glances exchanged as the two walked further into the temple to the living room. It was messy, but nothing seemed to bother Reader about said mess. Reader only climbed onto the couch and made himself comfortable within Wukong's space. This is the closest he has felt to anyone besides his apprentice. Even with such a wholesome and tender setting, he believes himself perverse for wishing to lie his head on Reader's shoulder.
With stiff shoulders, he sits beside Reader on the couch and places the bag in his lap. It's uncommon for Wukong to allow himself to display fear or hesitance, but Reader brought upon this feeling within his bones. he was unsure if it was familiarity of the hands.
“Wanna watch some trash TV?” Reader questions, handing Wukong the remote to the television before them. This was Wukong's Shame Temple after all. “I came over in hopes we could hang out. I don't care how we spend it, I just want it to be with you.”
Those words from his mouth and that voice sent Wukong's heart to palpitate. His face became flush beneath the fur upon it as he sheepishly took the remote within his hands. “Yeah, sure, bud. What about Monkey Cop or something? MK likes that show I think,” Wukong muttered as he selected the show.
The light upon their faces is moving and changing in chromatics. It was pretty. Reader looked pretty. Wukong looked pretty. The other was pretty to the other. In that lighting, it seemed Wukong's body was unaware of its movements to make himself comfortable. Letting his guard down was a luxury in war. He was never fully asleep, never fully vulnerable. This luxury of vulnerability, even diluted, was worthy of tears as he found his solace within the shoulder of his confidant.
Wukong's head laid upon Reader's shoulder where his sleeve was sliced. The feeling of fur upon skin laid bare was not lost upon Reader. He looked upon the beauty and had to stop himself from gasping. His mind raced and his his body reacted with the flushing of his face. Reader tested his luck and gently took Wukong into his arms to hold him just a bit closer.
Wukong did not stir. If he had, it would have been of his own volition as Wukong was aware of his companion's actions. Greed was allowed for just a moment. He wished to revel in the depraved perverseness of wishing to be cherished and loved wholly. To be held in such a way mimicking that of a cradle or caring lover comforting their significant other. He wished to never let go, no matter how long he had lived without this touch before. He felt as though his heart would stop beating upon loss of skin-to-skin contact.
Of his own reluctant volition, Wukong stirs and looks upon Reader. Those thoughts of loving this man, as perverse as they are viewed, are flooding back with a reverent tone. Reader looked upon Wukong the same; reverential and with little pause. Why must this wholesome love be deemed perverse and sickening by those who believe they are the heavens?
Wukong decides to try and deflect the situation by biting into one of the peaches before offering it to Reader. “Here, bud, you gotta try these!” He exclaims, pushing the peach to his cheek playfully to try and make this situation much more comedic to cope with the intimacy he was not sure he would be ready for. Reader laughs before biting into the peach from Wukong's hand where Wukong had already bitten.
An indirect kiss. It's childish and nothing to look upon with worry, but Wukong seemed to acknowledge their places. Acknowledged their standing as a cut-sleeve and a bitten peach.
A/N This story is going to be similar to how I regularly write when I'm in my element. I tend to write more vaguely and with a lot of similes and metaphors. I have a lot of works in my draft that I need to work on. This was written on 09/23 at night while I was on the verge of passing for reference.
!FEM ALIGNED DNI!
Content (Warnings?): Cater x Male/Masc Reader, he/they pronouns for Reader, established romantic relationship, comfort, hurt/comfort, Cater crying, Reader is not Yuu, cuddling, premarital hand-holding, kissing, descriptions of bodily harm
People who say that ignorance is bliss are morons.
Intelligence, the ability to accurately assess and address an issue is definitely not bliss, but it is rewarding to solve and remedy a problem.
Remedy, it's what Cater needed. He sought asylum in the arms that held him currently. Remedy, that's what Reader was. He was his home, his remedy, and his stitches.
When Reader found Cater, Cater was an open wound. His insides poured out, leaving behind himself and his body sitting limply inside to stare back at this threat that was Reader. He stared, stared with hollow and empty eyes with threats embedded into their pupils. The stare shook with hesitance and fear.
Reader did not flee, did not shout, and did not blame. He only stood, staring, before he drops to his knees to hold and soothe the other boy gently. He stitched him closed. Cater was put back together, whole, and still hurt. Just because he held him together doesn't mean Cater wouldn't be scars. Scars fade, yes, but they never go away. But the healing is something to learn and grow from.
Cater lies in his dorm room, cheek pressed to Reader's chest. His ear rests at their heartbeat, listening to the steady rhythm. It beat for him, he remembered. Cater remembers Reader grabbing hold of his hand and leading it to Reader's chest. He held it there and told him that his heart beat for him. It was corny and they laughed about it afterwards, but it was still appreciated and born from love.
It was a love Cater didn't get to experience often, especially with his social media presence and having to put on this fake happiness. Cultivating this sweet, flawless, eccentric persona was exhausting, even feigning traits of himself to make Cay-Cay feel more real than Cater. It terrified him.
Reader's fingers planted themselves in his hair and took out his hair tie. The orange-to-gray hair molds around his fingers, allowing them to sew into his hair like seeds. It's calming, the gentle scratching movement of Reader's fingers.
Reader's other hand pulls the covers over them both to lock in more heat in the autumn chill. Cater smiled against their clothed chest, reaching out to capture their hand in his. Cater just holds it, wanting to feel his skin on his. While he lies there, Cater feels his lover's eyes on him. He, no doubt, has that boyish smile Cater fell for splitting his face with reverence for Cater.
Soon, Cater lifts his head to stare back into Reader's eyes. he stares, searching his eyes to find a semblance of disgust or a twisted love built on forged kindness. But he finds none of it.
Reader's eyes beamed with reverence, no matter how light or dark they seemed. There was always room for Cater in his eyes. Those same eyes crinkled, having scrunched from held laughter behind a bitten lip. Cater always thought that he looked handsome when he did that, for some peculiar reason.
“Hey?” Cater calls out softly, clearly calling out to ask a question. “Hey,” Reader answers, clearly teasing but allowing room for Cater to open up. A smile cracks Cater's previous and almost permanent smirk. it almost makes him rethink his question.
“Why do you love me so… you-like?” He questions, voice soft and slow. He isn't doubting his love, simply questioning why. 'Why do you love me like this, so soft and something I can only say is you, hun?"
It's a valid question, and Reader thought for a moment before answering. Their hand squeezes his, reassuring Cater that they were taking him seriously.
“You deserve it,” Reader answers earnestly. “You deserve to be loved all soft-like. I think if I love you, I should love you in a way that… nurtures and cares? I don't know how to say it, I just think you should be loved like… this. Like you're Cater Diamond and I want you, just because you're you. I don't need you, yeah, but no one should need anyone. And besides, if I needed you, that love ain't genuine, it's out of necessity."
That's all he had to say. All he had to say for Cater to look at him dumbfounded. A tar slides down Cater's cheek, slow and taunting with its lingering warmth.
Being the concerned boyfriend Reader is, he wipes Cater's tears, holding his face tenderly and giving him the option to pull away if he needed space. “Hey, honey, are you okay?” Reader questioned with a tender tone. He leaned in and inspected his eyes, searching for answers. What came next was heartbreaking and so rewarding all at once.
“I thought I didn't deserve you. But I'm rethinking that, definitely. I think I deserve your love, you, and I love you..”
That was all Reader needed to flush and have this lovestruck look cross his face that he only now saw on Cater.
“I love you, too,” Reader answered, looking down at Cater's lips. “Can I kiss you?... You can say ‘no’,”
Cater flushed a shade darker, meekly nodding in an uncharacteristic fashion. “Yes,” was all he managed.
Reader's fingers cupped Cater's jaw and led his face to his. He paused when they were only a couple centimeters apart to admire Cater's face up close; the face with one eye instead of two. Then, Reader kissed him, closing his eyes and savoring the moment like it was their first kiss together. Their actual first kiss together was much more awkward and ridiculous, though.
it lasted for a few moments before they both pulled back. Their foreheads rest against each other, completing their embrace. It was gentle, no expectations or need to perform for the other.
I. NEED. REQUESTS. I have no goddamn ideas for first of any and all kinds. Omg, I see people actually liking and reblogging my posts and I am so happy, but I know that I can't do shit if I don't have requests because I am a bum and I am sadly apart of dying and dead fandoms that need to be revived or have some kind of works for them. Please omg request something, literally anyone.
