Both Feminists and Gamergate Need a Chill Pill
I feel both sides by this point have been hijacked so successfully by hyperbolic trolls (the the point where I'm wondering if some were just very plants placed to derail the argument given all the trolls I see on politically forums it's very possible) that we all need to take a step back.
I now offer the disclaimer that i know now all feminists fall into the group described here just as not all gamers fall into Gamergate. I am being general.
To the Feminists: Yes, there are jerks who have gone out and insulted and threatened and done all the scare tactics you can with the internet. But I personally feel it's a minority of Gamergate. It's called the vocal minority, a small group that screams so loudly you cannot help but think they're the whole movement.
They are not. There are a lot of people in Gamergate who really just care about how video game journalism is too tied up with video game companies, many who event think the insults are stupid and the threats are insane. They were initially drowned out by people's outrage over the threats, which I myself and outraged about since those threats are not okay. Ever.
To the Gamergaters: Yes some of the feminists and others have flipped out at you unreasonably, but that is because of the trolls and others using your tag to harass. I want to believe that those associated with Gamergate genuinely want to talk about the issue, not about threatening to rape women in gaming, but I think you can see where people might get the wrong idea.
The feminists don't want to take away your games, or cut off your balls, or anything. There are feminists who care about gaming and think your cause is a worthy one, but get turned off by the trolls. And since that was your face for so long you can kind of see why they aren't sure about trusting you.
I'm a feminist and a gamer. I don't want to take away all the games I don't like or find offensive, for heaven's sake that could be a third of the games on the planet. Makes more sense for me to ignore them and not give them my money. There's also the fact that feminism is fragmented so one woman's feminist is another prude is another slut. It's complicated and I think even most feminists will admit you cannot have a single definition of it beyond wanting equality.
What we want from games is not exclusive:
Gamergate wants more honesty in video game journalism. We want games panned and praised fairly and wants the industry to not have so much control over the journalists.
Feminists want more representation for women in games. We've slowly been getting it, but there are still some games that heavily disappoint us on that front and so we talk about it honestly.
Those do not contradict. That's why we can be on the same side.
The Trolls
I feel that this whole thing got derailed early, potentially by scared companies who paid people to troll. Come on, it happens. They've been scarily good at manipulating perceptions.
Take the threats towards Anita Sakeensian. Do I like her? Eh, pretty indifferent really, she's made some good point but she's had some heavy misses too. Like her Bayonetta 2 review, such a miss.
Now, there's automatically those who call her a professional victim and even that she may have made the threats up. There's those who call her a feminist martyr. Me? Yeah, not enough info, though given how much vitriol her videos get it wouldn't shock me if someone went overboard and decided to out and out threaten her.
There's also Felicia Day. Says she's scared she'll be doxxed if she mentions Gamergate, gets doxxed almost right after. Even if it was an opportunistic troll, to the world at the large the assumption is that Gamergate did it. It's the assumptions like that which are killing you guys,
So even if you think there have been no threats or no one from Gamergate has ever apologized for those threats, depending on your side, remember: the other side is made of humans too. Assume they have a reason, some reason for what they are doing and try to take it seriously. Even if it sounds ridiculous to you there is a reason they feel strongly about this and that deserves a voice. Both sides deserve to talk at the table and be taken seriously.
it is hard to control people's perception, but it needs to be done.
I'm sorry to say the Gamergate tag's been dragged through so much mud that it'll take a while to rinse it off. Can it be done? Certainly. But it will be hard. Most people have already put you in the little box and every time some jerk uses your tag to go after someone it'll get bad all over again.
Both sides need to do something. Feminists, find the good points of Gamergate and support them. Support them with all your might. Remember, they think you want to hurt them and that is a bad perception we have given gamers of us. Gamgergate, organize and keep a better eye on yourselves. So the second you see a stupid post full of misogyny and threats you can laugh and go, "That's not us, and wow they're an idiot!"
Both sides must reassure each other of their good intentions until trust can be built. Given the rocky start, it might take a while. Let's all try rolling for diplomacy anyway.
We all need to let go and do the work so we can aim at the people both sides are really annoyed with: the corporations. Who, again, I would not be shocked to find have been planting some of this stuff we've been fighting over. Divide and conquer, after all.