Dark Purveyor Headcanons!
Thinks milk is a fucking sin.
See’s Lewis as a cousin or something.
*HIGH PITCHED SCREAMING-*
Got a fucking Darwin Award because he died from kissing a microphone, literally just kissing it.
THAT DUMB FRIEND WHO CAN TOUCH SOMETHING AND IT’LL GET SET ON FIRE BECAUSE EVERY THING HE DOSE IS CHAOTIC AS FUCK.
Literally a loveable big dumb.
IF SOMEONE IS CLOSE TO HIM, AND THEY GET SICK HE WILL PERSONALLY NURSE THEM BACK TO HEALTH.
IMAGINE THAT TALL ASS VIKING ZOMBIE MAKING SOME CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP AND FEEDING IT TO HIS SICK ASS FRIEND!
He secretly watches anime.
That friend. That friend who does stupid ass shit but is so smart that he would ascend time and fucking space.
Vikke and Yumil, yeah. They know how to do the puppy eyes. And they work every fuckin time.
She’s summed up by the video How To Be A Cancer. She is so fuckin Chaotic that no other video suits her dumbass ways.
Spreaking of Chaotic she can’t have caffeine or everything will be on fire soon after it.
If you don’t give her caffine for a week she gets so peaceful that even Zed calms his ass down.
Hisses at that one toxic character in movies.
Watches Tom and Jerry in G Major just to watch them
Can balance Zed on his shoulders
Actually cries in G Major
Demonic Screaming With Mariska
Mariska ate his leftovers
He can sense the exact size bra his female friends wear and will buy them some if they need any.
He failed his own vibe check.
Can physically do the >:^> face
The more zombies that basically just pop into existence the smaller he gets
Actually deadass has elvis’ voice but dosen’t fookin T A L K.
Not bby, but..actually really bby.
Once he gets to tbe other purveyors height his chin has basically just shrunk, so he looks like some teen who’s obsessed with elvis for no reason.
Smol Killabilly is too cute for u.
I don’t think I missed anyone right? If I did big oof.
