Somehow, he’s hit a frayed end of one vein. Instead of bleeding,
he’s turned into a razor of his own it sits on his tongue, cold a-
nd hard to accompany the pounding of his head. Ally is the last
person he would ever want to hurt. Ever want to lash out against.
But the tide takes him, and it’s too late for him to reach for shore.
It starts with I don’t want to talk but she lingers like a gentle sil-
ver shadow. Feels like manicured nails tearing rivulets into his b-
ack. His hands tangle in his dark curls. Latch and pull.
“ Leave me alone. Haven’t you fucked with my
head enough?”
Voice cracks on the end, because he regrets it already. God, he’s
so t i r e d .
“I’m sorry. Fuck me. I’m such a fuck-up.”
He’s dangerously close to biting nail into the flesh of his temples.
Feels like deja-vu.
[ haventyoufuckedwithmyheadenough
haventyoufuckedwithmyheadenough
haventyoufuckedwithmyheadenough
haventyouhaventyouhaventyou—— ]
She can't breathe. This wasn't what she wanted, no,
no, please no, anything but this. Anything but realizing
exactly how this was all her fault, how if he never met
her, there'd be no rip in his mind, he'd never have felt
this pain. He'd never had to have dealt with this. He'd
be okay. He'd be closed off but he'd be better than he
was right fucking now, going crazy in his own skin.
Allison can't. Understand what happened. She pushed
him, she did. Just a little, it was only a little, but she—-
she shouldn't have done that. She fucked up, she really
fucked up this time. Leave him alone. He wants her to
leave him the fuck alone.
Everything sounds like water. Like she's drowning, and
the smile on her face doesn't taste right, normal. Tastes
fake; plastic. She smiles and tastes metal, porcelain.
[ pleasedonttakemysunshineaway—- ]
❝ I—- ❞
Takes steps away, away from him, outstretched hand
dropping like lead, back rigid as if her spine were just
injected with iron.
❝ Sorry. I'll—-I'll go. ❞
[ Haven't you fucked with my head e n o u g h ? ]
