#lmfao post

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

contributing to the online discourse:

during earthquakes coffins become underground maracas

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

do you think chickens get postnatal depression

like they have babies and we literally steal their children

and eat them

how would you like it if you had a child and the doctors all “it’s a boy!” and then some devious baby farmer snatches your kid and roasts it over a fire while sprinkling seasoning on them

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

*looks off into the distance*

i was a baby.... once

*the phrase “i was a baby” starts playing to the tune of “i have a dream” while confetti rains from the ceiling with pictures of my face*

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

you all are not

y’all are not

y’all ain’t

YAINT

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

to everyone who tells me “go big or go home”:

you severely underestimate my desire to go home

[i-am-an-intrusive-thought]

no return policies are essentially the store telling you “no taksie backsies”