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[maxjustmaxnotmadmax]

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This is a rough recording of the first song I ever wrote back when I was a teenager in high school. It’s about wanting/needing to come out to my family and accepting that it would probably mean the end of my relationship with them. 

Lyrics:

This is the last place you’ll call home.

These are the photographs they’ll keep.

These are the little things that make it clear

that there’s something in the dark that you can’t see.

But when the shadows clear,

don’t take the time to see.

This is the face of every fear. 

These are the last few words of peace.

This is the flame that flickers out

in the silence of a tainted atmosphere.

But when the candle’s burned

don’t waste a match on me.

But when it goes, it’s gone.

Don’t hold your breath for me.

I chose a life you can’t condone.

Don’t change your mind for me. 

[lunas-icecreamshoppe]

**not my original art, just my edit. Pls tag oc and i will update, ty**

[absenceofideas]

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CHECK OUT MY NEW SONG!! 💕💕💕💕🖤🖤

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[maxjustmaxnotmadmax]

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This is a song written about an instance of sexual assault. I hope it speaks to someone else out there. Expand for Lyrics.

Lyrics:

I don’t drink liquor or my dinner

will get up and leave my body.

Nothing good happens past eleven

is what my mother taught me.

And I’m hiding in your bathroom

and I don’t know what to do.

If you’re as scared of me as I am of you

then what’s your excuse?

I don’t care much if your roof leaks

or that your boyfriend cheats on you.

Don’t tell me that you’re lonely, boy,

cause I’ve been lonely too.

All I’m saying

is that you kind of jumped the gun,

when all I kept saying

was “I am drunk, not having fun”.

Now I’m watching out for danger in

every passerby.

And I spend most of my free time

sleeping in or getting high.

And I’m still stuck in that bathroom,

and hiding out from you.

I feel frozen, stiff and stuck in place,

but it’s time to move.

I don’t care much if your roof leaks,

or that your boyfriend cheats on you.

And don’t tell me that you’re lonely, boy,

cause I’ve been lonely too.

All I’m saying

is that you kind of jumped the gun

when all I kept saying 

was “I am drunk, not having fun”.

[maxjustmaxnotmadmax]

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For Carl.

Lyrics:

How’s the weather from the ground?

You’re not the biggest fish around no more.

And don’t get lonely now;

you haven’t even knocked on the biggest door.

And I know you’ve got big dreams

of chemicals and fishing streams

on your mind.

Can’t think clearly half the time and-

and the world may pass us by

but for now we’re safe and high 

in the trees only we seem to see clearly.

I don’t know what’s right,

but you don’t fit this crime.

If you have to preach these lies,

then sell it with the rhymes and that’s okay.

Well isn’t this just great?

My apathy is turning into hate.

I have to get away,

or keep this cigarette inside my face.

And my lungs may shrink and die,

a surprise, oh my, oh my.

I’ll hang around,

but I’m never coming back to town this way.

And I know you’ve got big dreams 

of chemicals and fishing streams

on your mind.

Can’t think clearly half the time

and I don’t know what’s right,

but you don’t fit this crime.

If you have to preach these lies

then sell it with the rhymes and that’s okay.

[maxjustmaxnotmadmax]

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Another rough recording of a song I wrote.  I wrote this one a few months ago about dealing with an emotionally abusive ex after a mutual friend passed away unexpectedly. This isn’t so much about my friend who passed away...it’s about being frustrated that I was trying to process his death while my ex was trying to use his death as an excuse to contact me. He also twisted the narrative to make it sound like my friend had committed suicide, but that was not the case. I remember being frustrated that this was the song I wrote, because I WANTED to write a song about my friend...but as always, my ex and the chaos he brought felt larger than life. My feelings felt like they were being held hostage. I was very sad, shocked and in a confused place. This is what came out. I hope this speaks to someone out there.

Lyrics:

I want a hand to hold at night.

I need one free to stop the fights.

I want a horse to beat until he drinks.

I want to scream “It’s all your fault”,

but I don’t want to take your call.

I want a bird to cage until he sings.

You want a rollercoaster romance.

You want the cheering of the crowd.

You want the Cadillac back end put on your Toyota Prius mouth.

I don’t think just like you,

but sometimes my friends, they die too.

I want some sage to cast a spell

but I don’t want to go to hell.

I want to be friends with everyone I know.

I want to go so far away,

but I don’t want to leave today.

I want to go high when everything goes low.

You want to make up all the lyrics

but you don’t want to have to sing.

You want the comprehensive coverage, 

but you don’t want to cover me.

I don’t grieve just like you,

but sometimes my friends, they die too.

You want a rollercoaster romance.

You want the cheering of the crowd.

You want the Cadillac back end put on your Toyota Prius mouth.

I don’t grieve just like you,

but sometimes my friends, they die,

and ya, sometimes I do cry.

But sometimes my friends, they die too.